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AAA
ALL SYSTEMS GO!
You: Mostly happy. Mostly
healthy. Mostly trim. Completely
employed. Totally fun, energetic
and active. Enjoy traveling. Live
in Eugene/Springfield are. Age
49 1/2 to 60 3/4 (or something
close) NS/ND. Me: ditto. Write to
blind box “ditto”. ✍
SWM,34, 5’10, athletic & easy
going. looking for friend to
hang out with, attend shows/
social events. I enjoy bike
rides, leisure dining, live music
and sharing. would like to
meet anyone willing to share
and have fun ☎ 2437
DOWN TO EARTH
Seeking
partner
for
hiking/exploring the Oregon
coast and the great northwest.
5’7, 160, witty, fun, humorous,
adventurous, Scrabble, movies,
photography. You? Friends
first, possible LTR. ☎ 2436
40 yr., seeking kind, adventur-
ous friend for outdoor activi-
ties, live music and movies. ☎
2359
5’10”BUSTYBOMBSHEL
Where’s Big Daddy!Well
dressed, Attractive, Tall, Long
Blondhaired, Green Eyed,
Intelligent-10. Seeking 30-45,
tall, financially secure. I love
being pampered & like to
please! So where is my SUGAR
DADDY? ☎ 2452
MUTINY NEEDED
Nicer girl, UofO, needs com-
passionate guy. SWF-concerts,
coffee breaks. Am small, light
haired, finishing classes in
cognitive psych. above board
and looking for a non-smoking
guy 25-39. ☎ 2441
HELLO OUT THERE!
I am looking for a genuine,
authentic, honest, employed
man in his 50’s. I can always
spend time with me, but I would
rather spend time with you. Drop
me a line. Tell me about yourself.
A photo would be nice. NS ND
Write to blind box “Hello” ✍
LOOKING FOR FRIEND
Active, Attractive, Athletic-
Youthful, SWF, HWP, Mid forty’s,
mom, honest, classy, fun,
sense of humor, educated, pro-
fessional, with a love for the
outdoors, would like to meet a
SWM with similar characteris-
tics for possible LTR, NS ☎
2364
VEGAN ON THE COAST
MISFIT SEEKS SAME
NICE GUY SEEKING LADY
I’m 63 and retired, financially
secure, seeking lady 50-60 for
companionship. In good physi-
cal condition, 5’10, 176 lbs. Love
travel & outdoors. I would love
to meet you. Write blind box
“Seeking Lady”. ✍
NO INTERNET TYPING
Happy, honest, fit, 56, NS, ND.
ISO F, 40-60. Spontaneous,
independent, open-minded,
honest heart. Lets explore our
smiles, dreams, pleasures,
travel & snorkle spaceship
earth with a see and do it all
spirit. ☎ 2453
I have looks, brains, a house,
and I don’t fit in anywhere,
Perhaps you feel the same
way? Maybe we fit together?
40ish, healthy, non-smoker,
creative type, etc..etc...Ask and
I will tell. ☎ 2434
ISO LTR
FUN GRANDPA
FIND IT
BLOND GODDESS
THE KIVA 11/30
SWM, 54, lives at the beach,
likes the mountains too, loves
to fish & crab, cook & garden,
enjoys a glass of wine. Seeking
single woman with similar
interests. ☎ 2414
ISO fit, ALIVE, playful women
or couple for potluck, playing
or listening to music, hot tub,
group/single massage. Goal is
to create safe, playful quality
experience. Questions? ☎
2226
I watched you celebrate your
birthday at BJ’s on 12/4. You
become more beautiful every
year.
You were looking for smaller
garlic and my friend helped.
Your smile has been haunting
me and I’m kicking myself for
not talking to you. Coffee or
drinks? ☎ 2438
ISO A WIFE
Looking for a wife that can
have a child. I believe that I
can care for a wife very well. I
have a state of mind that is
called legitimacy. ☎ 2413
SHOW ME THE ROPES
Hot SM 40 ISO hot horse-loving
women 25-45 who can show
me the ropes on a part time
bases. I am very interested in
finding you. ☎ 2411
FREEDOM IN REACH
23 yo convict with hard body,
good looks and tattoos. Am
fun, spirited and deep souled.
Seeking a woman’s correspon-
dence to secure relationship
before parole. Write to blind
box “Freedom”. ✍
SWM, NS, seeks compassionate
woman 30-50 to share life in
an open heart space. Well edu-
cated, progressive, over trav-
eled, kids a plus. Looking to
create a LTR in a safe emotion-
ally growing space. ☎ 2420
Handsome, 5’8, 140 lbs, 45 yo,
well endowed marathon man.
ISO: cute, playful, sexually
aggressive women 35-55, 150-190
lbs with alot of spare time. Safe,
clean. Not seeking LTR. ☎ 2404
DEEPER EXPLORATIONS
SALSA PARTNER
Beyond the hiking, beach,
Bijou, wine and dancing all EW
women seem to, are there still
HWP women 30-50 (mothers
especially welcome) who want
deeper conscious connection
on all levels? ☎ 2419
I’m looking for a Salsa dance
partner to practice with, 18 to 40,
willing to learn with me. ☎ 2402
MARATHON MAN
DEXTER SKI CLUB
Single male 43 seeks unat-
tached tree skiing tele buddy to
assist with trail planning/groom-
ing at new local ski area. ☎ 2369
JESSE @ GOOD TIMES
Friday December 7th. I was sit-
ting on the deck, you were
playing pool. You said my
shoes looked made for danc-
ing. You left before I could
give you my number. Get
ahold of me. Jen ☎ 2458
CAFE ROMA
friday afternoon- you were
inside studying, cute girl,
blonde hair with hat, i walked
by with a friend, brief eye con-
tact, I was too busy to say hi,
single? coffee? ☎ 2455
SEX & INTIMACY
SWM 44 ISO lovely woman who
is 30-45 in shape, well-
groomed and knows the differ-
ence between sex and intima-
cy and likes both. ☎ 2410
VOL. IN MEDICINE
LUCKEYS 11/25
BI WOMEN’S GROUP
Meets the third Friday of every
month at 7:00 pm. Call for
more details. Please No
Men/TG/TS. ☎ 2062
Rassi, I forgot to give you my
number. We got along so great
and I want to know you. Please
get in touch and don’t believe
your
brothers
gossip.
Jeannine ☎ 2456
NICE GUY
You: Getting off the plane,
smart, saucy, super sexy.
Never looked so sweet. Me:
smitten, slowly composing
librerotica. I’ll be your book of
the month; please read a thou-
sand pages. ☎ 2454
I5 ACCIDENT NOV 25
LADY JENNIFER!
Milady! Upon our acquaintance
Thou gavest me a Hambo and
a Contra, and t’were grand! Yet
the twain sufficeth not! Pray,
couldst, wouldst come again
and grant thine humble ser-
vant yet another dance?
L’homme a la fleur. ☎ 2416
LOST MY RAIN GEAR!
DRS. CHAMPER/KARTH
Did you find my basic (grimy)
yellow rain jacket and black
pants on 13th Street 12/05?
Want to give them back?
Contact me. Small reward. ☎
2445
Back to back appts. on Monday,
mid afternoon. We smiled, said
hello couple of times. You good
looking in your turtleneck and
gray cords. Was that you on
2W Oak St. garage two days
later? Could only see black sil-
houette against light sky back-
ground. Coffee? ☎ 2415
Monday around 1:00 at either
Roma or Sakura. Green
wool/felt, parallel stitching on
the bill, by Hat People.
Sentimental value. Happily
pay the cost of ad response. ☎
2444
JOHN HENRY’S
SPENCERS BUTTE
Met your puppy Eastwood but
couldn’t take eyes off
owner...Do you play well with
others? ☎ 2451
HABITAT FUNDRAISER
Me: tall with red cap. At the
Habitat for Humanity fundrais-
er you stopped to admire my
lamp, but we didn’t have time
to light it up together. ☎ 2418
I helped Joan after her Nissan
was scalped under jackknifed
semi truck in the fog 5am Sun
Nov 25. Cant stop thinking
about her-she was taken to
Sacred Heart with fractured
skull. Does anyone know her or
anything? ☎ 2446
LOST MY HAT
FOXY LIBRARIAN
Meet someone open-oriented.
☎ 2225
12/3 You: volunteer dark hair,
yellow blouse, red stetho-
scope. Me: green shirt, OSU
hat, blood draw. Talked about
blood and movies. Single?
Movie? Coffee? More talk? Go
ahead, call. ☎ 2447
BOOK STOLEN
You stole my author signed
“sci-fi” book...my notes won’t
help you understand the truth.
I’m looking for you to make
this right. ☎ 2409
Hottie boy bartender @ John
Henry’s Saturday 12/1. Oh my
you were fun to watch last
night. What else are you fun
at? ☎ 2440
BY ROB BREZSNY
ARIES (March 21-April 19): “Everything absolute belongs to
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): At Free Will Astrology, we love to
pathology. Joyous distrust is a sign of health.” So proclaimed
Friedrich Nietzsche. Note well that he used the adjective “joy-
ous” to describe distrust, not “cynical” or “grumbling” or “sour.”
The key to remaining vital and strong while questioning every
so-called absolute is to cultivate a cheerful, buoyant mood as
you do it. That’s one of your top assignments in the coming
weeks, Aries: Practice joyous distrust.
turn things upside-down and inside-out every now and then. It
keeps our mental hygiene sparkling clean, and yours, too. This
week, in order to incite a purifying ruckus, we’re offering you a
challenge from psychologist James Hillman. Please suck the fol-
lowing thoughts into the deepest recesses of your understand-
ing, and enjoy the brainstorms they detonate: “By accepting the
idea that you are the effect of a subtle buffeting between heredi-
tary and societal forces, you reduce yourself to a result. The
more your life is accounted for by what already occurred in your
chromosomes, by what your parents did or didn’t do, and by your
early years now long past, the more your biography is the story
of a victim.” What I’m trying to tell you, Virgo, is that it’s a fine
time to rebel against your genetic heritage, your upbringing, and
your conditioning. Imagine a life for yourself in which you don’t
believe that those factors control what you’re capable of.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Here are the best and most
enjoyable ways to capitalize on your current astrological omens:
(1) Transform one of your so-called liabilities into at least a tem-
porary asset; (2) lose any attachment you have to pleasures and
rewards that won’t mean much to you a year from now; (3) allow
and even invite people to show you how you can get smarter; (4)
compassionately identify the limits of the people you care about;
(5) squeeze every last lesson out of what you’re leaving behind.
GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In Big Russ and Me, a memoir
about growing up, journalist Tim Russert writes a lot about
what he learned from his father. Here’s one story: Whenever a
family member accidentally broke some glass, his dad took
extraordinary precautions wrapping up the shards in a sealed
box before depositing them in the trash can. Why? Because he
wanted to be sure the garbagemen wouldn’t cut their hands. I
urge you to be that conscientious in the coming week, Gemini.
Imagine in detail the impact your actions might have on all the
people, both known and unknown, whose lives you touch. The
gods will reward you for doing so.
CANCER (June 21-July 22): Are your cohorts looking at you
quizzically, wondering why you seem so energized from exploring
the shadowy, off-limits places? I’ll offer some suggestions about
what you could say to them. First, try to make them see that
until you’ve risked going too far, you may not know when to stop.
Second, tell them that you suspect there are healthy desires
buried at the roots of your dark feelings, and you’re hoping to
free them. Third, explain to them that you’re not picking at your
scabs in order to prolong your hurt, but rather to better under-
stand the hurt. If those rationales are too subtle for your com-
panions to understand, cackle softly and say that you just need
to be a little bad in order to give your goodness more soul.
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): A lightning bolt is hot, fast and potent.
It can travel at 100,000 mph, reach temperature of 60,000
degrees Fahrenheit, and generate enough energy to illuminate a
light bulb for two months. And yet it’s usually no more than an
inch in diameter. This is an apt metaphor for the kind of highly
concentrated power you will have available in the coming days,
Leo: deceptively petite in proportion to its enormous wallop.
Please use it wisely.
54 DECEMBER 13, 2007
LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): It’s the Season of Returns and
Recoveries, Libra. You will generate good fortune if you look for
what you lost. Here are some suggestions on how to proceed:
Recall important memories you’ve almost forgotten, retrieve
any valuable things you rashly threw away, and bushwhack your
way back to a promising path you strayed from. For best results,
you should forgive yourself of any mistakes you think you made
that led to the loss.
SCORPIO
(Oct. 23-Nov. 21): For reasons too silly to go into
here (involving romance, of course), I once spent six months
making thrice-weekly three-and-a-half-hour roundtrips from
Chapel Hill, NC to Columbia, SC. The back roads I drove on were
sparsely traveled and my ancient pick-up truck didn’t have a
radio, so I passed the time by reading. I became quite skilled at
continually darting my eyes back and forth between the road
and the open book resting on my steering wheel. In this way I
got through James Joyce’s Ulysses, Leo Tolstoy’s Anna
Karenina, and Thomas Mann’s Magic Mountain. I don’t advise
you to try something so dangerous, Scorpio, but I do believe it’s
a perfect astrological moment for you to master the art of slip-
ping back and forth between two starkly different realities.
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): A group of us decided to
throw a party. The Sagittarian among us, Rosa, insisted on being
in charge of supplying the desserts. She feared that if anyone
else handled this task, there wouldn’t be enough, and they
wouldn’t be sweet enough or rich enough or decadent enough.
To make sure the delectable treats were available in rapturous
abundance, she felt she could only trust herself. In this spirit, I
appoint you to be the sweet, rich, decadent dessert-provider for
the entire world in the coming weeks. I’m using “desserts” in
both the literal and metaphorical senses.
CAPRICORN
(Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Among modern Baghdad’s
most prominent architectural features are its blast walls. These
omnipresent concrete barriers shield buildings from truck bombs
and random gunfire. They were nothing but oppressive eyesores
up until a few months ago, when a team of 40 artists began cover-
ing them with brightly colored murals that depict idyllic landscapes
and glorious scenes from Iraqi history. Your next assignment,
Capricorn, is to try an equivalent conversion. Add beauty to some-
thing ugly; bring a light touch and a creative spirit to a trouble-
some situation; dress up your defense mechanisms in silk and gold.
AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Let’s meditate on events that
have an impact at a great distance from their origins. For
instance, African dust reaches Florida, raising pollution levels,
just as particulate matter from China floats over to sully
California’s skies. Here’s another example: The CIA played a
major role in overthrowing the democratically elected prime
minister of Iran in 1953, and this is still wreaking chaos on the
current relationship between the U.S. and Iran. In the coming
week, Aquarius, I predict your life will provide another example
of this theme, although in your case the long-range influence is
likely to be far more benign than the other cases I cited — possi-
bly even downright benevolent.
PISCES
(Feb. 19-March 20): “Open your minds, sweethearts,”
begins the soothing rant of enlightenment advisor Dvorah Adler
(Dvorahji.com). “Take a deep breath in and a deep breath out. It’s
time for you to hear the big secret of the ages, the radical truth of
truths that only the wisest gurus and avatars and grandmothers
are brave enough to reveal. Are you ready? Here it is: ‘SHUT UP
AND BE HAPPY!’” I’m pleased to convey Dvorah’s ancient truth to
you, Pisces, because it’s what you need to hear right now. So
please, darlings: Shout, whisper, or sing “SHUT UP!” to all the voic-
es in your head that are so addicted to saying “What am I doing
wrong?”, “When will I finally be happy?”, and “Why can’t every-
thing be perfect forever?” The fact is, you are exactly where you
need to be, and everything is proceeding with mysterious grace.
HOMEWORK : Forget what Time magazine thinks. Who is
your “Person of the Year?” Tell me at FreeWillAstrology.com;
click on “Email Rob.”
Go to RealAstrology.com
to check out Rob Brezsny's
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