TO THE EDITOR
BY SALLY SHEKLOW
An Open Letter
To the anti-gay marriage crowd
D
ear heterosexual supremacists: Thank you for
caring so much about my personal business. I
feel a little guilty because, frankly, I don’t
care at all about yours. No offense.
It’s just that your marriage, as state-sanctioned
and God-ordained as it may be, isn’t something I
spend much time imagining. Not that I have to. I see
and read and hear about straight marriages every day.
The way you flaunt your lifestyle, it’s sort of hard to avoid.
You don’t exactly keep your dirty laundry private. I mean,
who doesn’t already know that half of all One-Man-One-Woman marriages end in di-
vorce? It’s no secret. Any women’s shelter can tell you that 97.5 percent of domestic
violence occurs in straight households. Still, I’m not out there trying to prevent het-
erosexual marriage (although I do support women’s shelters).
You spend millions persuading folks that same-sex unions somehow threaten
straight marriages. Kinda crazy, but your freedom of speech, like mine, is protected.
Just think, though, of all the good you could do if the time and effort and money you
pour into your anti-gay marriage campaigns went toward something useful — like re-
ducing poverty or saving the rain forest or making peace between nations. You know
— helping.
Opportunities abound. Work for issues that really matter. You’re wasting your di-
vine talents on something you can’t change and besides, isn’t hurting anyone. Gay
people are not out to get you. We’re busy trying to protect ourselves and our families
from prejudice and discrimination — who has time to plot against straight people? Our
unions don’t threaten yours. Look around. We’re not the ones organizing our congre-
gations against you or rallying voters to declare your relationships unconstitutional
or lobbying our legislators to deny your rights.
You should be thankful your newlywed photos run in our local newspaper, the very
paper that — unlike The New York Times — refuses to print same-sex wedding an-
nouncements. That policy isn’t fair or right, but it doesn’t make me launch a cam-
paign against heterosexuals’ civil liberties. Just like your freedom to choose your reli-
gion, your choice to marry outside your sex is protected by law. If you choose to keep
marrying and divorcing your opposite-sex partners, I won’t stop you.
Don’t fault same-sex marriage for your own failings.
Gay people can’t hurt the institution of marriage.
Hello? We didn’t invent adultery. Or wife-beating.
Same-sex unions aren’t the reason most female murder
victims are killed by their husbands.
Where’s the sanctity in that?
I do find your obsession with same-sex marriage bizarre, but I don’t scour the
Bible for verses that might bolster my opinion, although I understand there are quite
a few — love thy neighbor as thyself, for example.
Don’t fault same-sex marriage for your own failings. Gay people can’t hurt the in-
stitution of marriage. Hello? We didn’t invent adultery. Or wife-beating. Same-sex
unions aren’t the reason most female murder victims are killed by their husbands.
Where’s the sanctity in that?
What you do in the privacy of your own marriage — or even what you say about
mine — is beyond my control. You call me perverse, but you Defense of Marriage peo-
ple seem incredibly weird to me. Come on, is there anything weirder than fixating on
other people’s sexuality? Your non-consensual peeping into my life is downright
creepy.
G
et a clue. You can’t eradicate or outlaw or convert everyone who isn’t made
in your image. So we’re different — big deal.
Instead of demonizing me for the way I was created, why not think about
what really matters and pitch in? We could work together, pool our energies to in-
crease dignity, respect, and joy in the world. For everyone.
I would at least like to continue the life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness that our
Constitution deems my inalienable rights. I know prejudice runs deep and that blam-
ing scapegoats is human nature, so I forgive you your limitations. You’re entitled to
take as long as you want to come to grips with reality.
Meanwhile, this would be a good time to kindly step aside and mind your own busi-
ness.
Most sincerely, Sally Sheklow
Award-winning Eugene writer Sally Sheklow urges you to call Speaker Of The House Karen Minnis at
(800).332-2313 and demand an up/down vote on SB 1000. The Oregon Senate cast a historic vote July 8 when it
approved SB 1000 (civil union/non-discrimination) by a 19-10 margin, but Minnis is sitting on it and refusing to let
it come to a house vote. Minnis could stall this until the end of the session so that we can’t try again for two more
years. Let your voice be heard.
6 JULY 21, 2005
“freedom fighters” ... and maybe we would
appreciate the wonders of corporate hege-
mony just a bit more than we have, gazing
from barred Haliburton windows while try-
ing to explain habeas corpus to smirking
guards.
A few years of this due process would
certainly put some backbone into our limp
liberal spines, and even compel us to re-
place our self-righteous scowls with empty
toothed smiles of capitulation — after
Karl’s team successfully whittles away the
Bill of Rights to the single nub of the
Second Amendment. The marketing gurus
of the Republican Right should find them-
selves comforted indeed — since
Amendments Four, Five, Six, Seven and
Eight are already dust. And since there is no
profit in reporting a loss, our media will
continue to cherish the feed-bag soothsay-
ers while gagging the coal-mine canaries
like myself.
Tom Erwin
Eugene
WAR IS PEACE: 1984
Now W is saying we’ll fight until we win
in Iraq. That could take awhile, maybe
longer.
In Afghanistan, the Taliban and allied
tribes are coming back from the ashes. I read
about an Afghan jihadist who fought against
the Soviets. They hiked the Khyber pass car-
rying heavy loads of weapons and ammo on a
sparse breakfast of turnip soup and bread.
How do you beat those kind of people?
At this writing, 1,751 American soldiers
have died in Iraq. 13,000-plus have been
wounded. We can’t find agreement on Iraq
casualties, and $250 billion has been spent.
Read your math.
I’ve always thought that the modern
Israeli-Palestinian conflict has made the
Middle East what it is. Non-stop death and
destruction.
We have al-Qaeda right where they want
us. Good luck to us.
Greg Hume
Creswell
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