OUT I
/n q ç
LANS LA NEVE
SEVE
We are Inclined to believe that
most every one, even the most
surly
sort
of Individuals,
possesses a certain amount of
humor. In view of Oils theory,
ever so often I take the occas
ion to devote this column to In
cidents of mostly a humorous
nature that have been gleaned
from various states. Perhaps
at least some of you readers
may find some of the following of
an amusing nature. Here’ s
hoping. If not, those of a more
serious trend that are published
In this issue may appeal to you.
Anyway, read ’ em.
CALLING A LL CATS
When a Michigan man was as
signed the task of caring for the
fam ily parrakeet he was not too
happy. The little bird was bad
tempered and messy. The fe l
low endured the bird fo r some
time, however, and even started
to teach it to talk. One day
the bird disappeared. By coin
cidence, boththecagedooranda
nearby window had been left
open.
"That was really too
bad,” the man said, “ as I only
had time to teach it one short
phrase.” It seems that phrase
was, “ Here, kitty, kitty, here,
kitty .”
ME TOO, DAD
A Connecticut fisherman de
cided it was tim e fo r his son
to learn the joys of fishingwhen
he celebrated his eighth b irth
day. Everything was going just
dandy.
They dug worms,
gathered up their tackle, packed
a lunch, and in no time flat were
off fo r pop’ s favorite fishing
spot. The ride there was just
fine. However, the next step
was a steep bank between the
parking lot and the water’ s
edge. Cautioning his young, in
experienced son, the father gave
instructions fo r him to wait and
watch how he mastered thepro-
MOTOR VEHICLES
SPUR ECONOMY
th e s t a t e passed the m illio n
m ark in 1968 by an estim ated
6, 000 units. This is a 35, 000
increase over 1967. W ith truck
registrations increased by m ore
than 10,000 units, the state now
has 1, 236, 000 m o to r v eh icles.
Oregon residents supported
t h e i r highw ay transportation
system through paym en t of $106
m illio n in state highw ay user
taxes in 1968. Included w ere
$63 m illio n in gasoline taxes,
about $18 m illio n in vehicle
reg istratio n fees and som e $25
m illio n in m o to r carrier and
m iscellan eo u s user charges. The
sta te also provides m ere than
$ 6 5 m illio n to the F ederal gov
ern m en t in auto m o tiv e excise
taxes.
.
T rucking continues as a grow-
i n g business in Oregon w ith
trucks representing about 16. 5
per c e n t of registered vehicles
an d paying m ore than 45 per
c e n t of special state veh icle
tax es. The state has m ore than
122,000 workers involved in the
co m m e rc ia l use of trucks.
O regon's rank as an a g ricu l
tu ra l state rem ains hig h aid ed
by the farm use of m ore than
53, 000 trucks, b etter than one
of every four private trucks re g
istered in the sta te .
A bout 3, 500 school buses
transport Oregon pupils to and
from classes w hile m ore tlvin
1, 200 other buses are in c o m -
m e ric a l use.
Z
blent. Dad just got under way
when he slipped, and shot the
steep slope on his back. He
ended up with a crash at the
water’ s edge.
The learning
youngster
innocently asked,
“ Daddy, do I have to go down
that way, too?”
UNUSUAL REQUESTS
Game wardens often receive
unusual inquiries, and some
times find that they have to turn
down certain requests. Such
was the case with a Pennsyl
vania game warden recently
when a lady called to ask a favor.
“ I’ve got poison ivy growing
up the side of my house,” she
said, “ and since you’ re a game
warden and immune to it, would
you come over and remove it? ”
The warden decided that this
was one of those “ so rry about
that” cases.
in Ontario, one of the hunters
began to curse. His displeasure
bruught a wave of laughter from
the party’ s Indian guide. The
guide explained that there were
no cuss words in the language
of his tribe, the Ojlbwa. Quite
amazed thehunter asked whathe
did when he hit his thumb with
a hammer. The guide smiled
and said, "Then I talk English.”
A GOOD LOOKER
The lowly starfish has an eye
at the end of each arm so he
can see in all directions at
once. — Remington Newsletter.
HUNGRY TRESPASSER
Muskrats are usually rather
quiet and harmless creatures,
but one made his presence
known when his appetite ran
wild in a Pennsylvania green
house. The little fellow got into
the greenhouse and couldn’ t find
his way out, so he decided to
have lunch, he munched on a
bed of snapdragons and chewed
off the stems of over 100 dozen
plants before he was caught and
removed.
At the wholesale
price of $4 a dozen, friend
muskrat chalked up quite a food
b ill.
CONFIDENCE DOESN’ T HURT
Sportsmen come in all sizes
and ages, and have a variety
of ideas and notions of how to do
something best. However, being
confident doesn’ t hurt. A 73-
year-old Arizona Sportsman
applied fo r an elk perm it re
cently and drew a late-season
bull license. Even though he
must hunt from a wheelchair,
the Arizonan doesn’ t let that
stop his enjoyment of outdoor
life.
His whole secret, how
ever, is perhaps his confidence.
Immediately after the hunter
received notice that he could
go gunning fo r elk, he went out
and bought a new freezer.
SEE, SEE, SENOR
Hawk’ s eyes have been called
nature’ s most highly-developed
organs of vision in existence.
They can seeat least eight times
as well as the most keen hu
man’s.—Outdoor Indiana.
Port O fc rd News, Thursday, Aueu t 21, 1969—3
SOUTH COAST
Offshore salm on fisherm en
a t Brookings are tro llin g right
on the bar or ju st outside and
are av eraging 1/3 to 1/2 fish
per an g ler. N early a ll fish are
Chinook. A t Gold Beach, how
ever, only an occasional Chin
KILLS CAN CER CELLS
ook is b ein g taken in the bay
R esearch a t the U niversity of w ith boats unable to get out due
O e g o n has produced a sim p li to rough bar conditions.
Increasing num bers of the
fied lab o rato ry m ethod tor m a k
ing a substance th a t k ills c a n famous "h alf-pound" sum m er
steelh ead are m oving into the
cer cells.
7Ae
Rogue R iver an are currently
providing f a i r tishing to tlie
e arly m orning an g ler. The m ain
run of fish should be entering
the riv er in the n e x t w eek or
tw o and anglers can look for
w ard to som e outstanding fish
ing when they arrive.
D rifted nightcraw lers, sm all
sp in -n -g lo s and dark fly p at
terns fished deep are the m ost
productive lures to c a tc h these
fish th at average 13 to 16 inches
in len g th . Most fish are taken in
the h o l e s betw een Elephant
R o c k and Lobster C reek but
som e of the best fly w ater exists
above this point.
Totals Are Always Lower
EASY ANSWER
When foul weather persisted
to haunt a party of Americans
et
J
SuW illliffl !
See the News office for i abb i
stam ps. N early any size or ¿tyle
a v a ila b le . P o r t O fa rd Net
t e t i y ¡ Cudnï
9P&II GubGCRiBER...
noli/ I Ktft o w e ®
LIFE
CEREAL
GPAK
When our checkers total up your food b ill, yo u 'll be
delighted by our lower prices. Come in and save
every shopping day w ith our help and service.
BY BOB BREWSTER
Outdoor E ditor,
M rrcury Outboard»
__
DON'T BOUNCE THE FISH
D id y o u e v e r s e e a
fis h e rm a n
p ra c tic in g
“ sk ip a lo n g ”?
I t ’s a game played by
trailing a stringer o f fish over
the side o f a b o at while the
th ro ttle is w ide open.
A l l k i d d i n g a s id e ,
forgetting to pull the stringer
in to the boat before moving
to another fishing spot is a
m is ta k e m ade by many
fishermen. The cure fo r the
p ro b le m , say the fishing
a u t h o r it ie s a t M e rc u ry
outboards, is to properly care
fo r fish the moment they are
taken. Fish should be placed
on ice as soon as possible, but
there are several preliminary
steps to keep in mind.
T h e y sh o u ld be drawn
im m e d ia te ly . The stom ach
co n ten ts begin to decay soon
after a fish is taken, and
gastric juices can eat through
th e wall causing tainted flesh.
Also be sure to rem ove all
blood along th e backbone.
N ext, wipe th e body cavity
dry with a clean cloth or
paper towel. T ry to keep the
fish from getting wet. Water
a ttracts b acteria which only
speeds decay.
Always p u t an ice chest in
th e b o at and take along some
plastic bags. The bags are
p e r f e c t w rapping and will
k e e p c le a n e d fish from
co n tactin g any w ater in the
ice chest. I t ’s b e tte r to lay
fish on to p o f the ice than to
b u ry them , and the chest
s h o u ld
be
opened
occassionally to let in some
fresh air.
In a d d i t i o n t o n o t
bouncing fish on the stringe',
th is m e th o d o f handling
assures you o f good eating
when you get them home.
H o w e v e r, th e m o s t
i m p o r t a n t c o n s id e r a tio n ,
advise th e lads at M ercury, is
th a t if the w om an o f the
house likes to eat the fish you
catch , bringing them hom e in
t h i s m an n er will make it
easier to get away the n ex t
tim e you w ant to go fishing
Where
families
gather
' S t'
IN ,
MIXEP NUTS
CORN
OLIVES LIMOSW PiTTTp
TMWTO JUICE
SWEET PICKLES
BACON » A X
SQUARES
3/2-02.
294 CORNIMI GAME MENE
CROCINO
A A < up
994
feeûeon CHEESE
7OP O ff
SOMMER
MEALS J
CUTLIPÇ
SPEC í AL
POTATO CHIPE
594
COTTAGE CHEEGE
P.wr m
TENPERI7ER ADO
UPH^
3/ v CJ. 494
WHEATIEG CEPE AL
?9<
GAEUEN PEAS MOUTt çw 994
TOMATO COUP C W e e u J s no ./ tins 494
KRKPV K PACKERS SUNSHINE Lê 394
FlOOR CLEMIEE SPIC N’ SPAM 6l«HT SG<4
B l u e
S Ü N B tA M
iS -Oz.
BISCUITS
peu .
B ox
for good
BOTATI
tim e s ...
oecôoN o t A s r
MÍOIUKA
W K
Vitto
HALP GALLON!
MEDIUM C0ZEI4
*7 9 4
L O flV fS
P iu s w e M
6 Ü T T Ç M IK
n
GREEN
PEPPERS
PEACHES 2 -4 9
&AR.TLETT
PEARS
TOMATOES 2 39
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