Salt Rheum
‘ ‘Dora your artist friend hare many
commissions?”
“ I believe he had one lest year.
H ia father-in-law asked h i « to paipt
CHINK8K OF PEKIN
“ Beynolds, ” « i d the oldest mem
ber ®f the Arm, “ how do you spell
’w h ich !' ”
. /
I”
Hood's Sanaparilla
’ You never seem to give even a
thought of your ancestors."
“ Oh, yes, I do; I often rejoice that,
w ith in public recollection, none of
them ever got hanged."
" W -h -L c -h ,” responded the other.
“ T h a t’s what I thought,'* rejoined
the older member, covertly scratch
ing a “ t ” o u t-o f the word he had
written.
S t ill H e re O o m ta rfM tln g .
T h e Secret Service hat unearthed another
bend o f counterfeiters end secured a large
q u an tity e f bogus billa. which arv to elever-
Ijr executed t h a t the average person would
never suspect them ot being ipurioua.
Things o f greet seise ere a lw e v t selected
for Im ita tio n , notably Hostetter’ Stomach
Bitters, which has m any Im itatora but no
equals for disodera like indigestion, dye-
peiHiia, constipation.nervooanass awe gen-
erai d eb ility. Alw ays go to reliable drug
gists who have the reputation o f giving
whet you ask for.
Wholesale Boots and Shoes
N ccmi M m Came First la Texas.
On account of a scarcity of bricks
in a Texas town the congregation of
“ I hear your husband is ill, Mrs. the local church allowed th eir nt
edifice to remain unfinished while
Jones."
saloon waa being erected.
“ Yaa’u m .”
“ Nothing serious or critical, I
hope?”
“ Critical?
I should say bo were.
H a a in ’t aatisfied w ith n o th in ” ho
a in ’t . ”
A Btaaa 1m Mw L lfo ag M any M o* York-
eve T h at F ew B eceU w it h M e a s u re .
The woman who had arrived grqw re
flective. "1 shall never forget my hall
bedroom days, 180 la number." aha
•aid. “A good deal baa been written
about the hull bedreem of New York,
b at »0 pea ca» tell att Ita mtsarloa 1
came to New York fresh from the am
ple »pace» of a country home. 1 look
a hall bedroom because it was ihe only
room la the hoaae 1 could afford. It
had lb It a cot. covered la day with an
‘Oriental’ tapestry; a waabstaad. a
screen, a shelf curtained off with hooka
Ona give yen the beet bargains la
beneath for clothes; a looking-gtaaa on
Buggies, b o v i , Bollera and Engine«,
the wall, with a little stand beneath,
Windmille and Pampa and Genarat
two chairs, and a useful piece of furni
Machinery. See as before buying.
ture whleh waa writing dank, bookcase
and dressing case com bined. W hen
my trank and my typewriter were
added to these treasuree 1 could turn
around with qgre, by opening the door
ao as to utilise a part of the hall for the
KRAUSSE * PRINCE,
“ **
purpose.
“My typewriter knocked out the little
stand la one round. Could It have eat
still It would have stood the burden.
But I had to move the stand whenever All Kinds Carried In Stock.
I wanted to drees, or to get at my trunk.
, and as 1 did not remove the typewriter,
„ .hut simply dragged the stand around,
Jones—.Van Founder’s latest music
tha poor thing quickly collapsed. The
- -
landlady looked severe when I told her. is bald stuff.
POaTLAMP.
S m ith— W hy bald?
When I got another stand I carefully
Jones— Because it needs an "air
lifted my typewriter off whenever 1
Thirty-third year,
wanted to m ove the stand, w hich was a restorer. ”
t a n . Modern m
earned, and I t a told that, although
the soil la vary productive, there Is
hardly enough cotton raised to supply
the demand. This to due, la great
measure, to the lack of tools in culti
vating It and poorer machinery fa r car
ing when harvested, as everything here
SCHOOLS M
M c o n t a s .
one people I ever saw, especially the published, with anjK, other orders re " " B y a rS i w i ware continually falling
- women. These latter are never Idle, quiring the attention of tbe battalion. from the hooks without the altgbtesi
i They are great gossips, but de not neg- Finishing with these sad the necessary provocation, and 1 had always to move
“ M a n d y ,” said Farm er Corntocsel,
Getting Back to Fane.
i lect their work on that account, and It alignment, “the middles“ are marched the screen, and then bring a chair to
•*f guess it would be just aa well not
to a common thing to see them chat- by companies Into the rneas hall. There stand on to hang them up again. The
“Is
yOur
ma well again, Eddie?”
to say so much about home cookin’
, ting In the narrow alleyways between they are allowed forty minutes for din only way 1 could get any light or air
•W ell, yes’m, but she a in ’t quite
when you are ta lk in ’ up your summer
their houses, but always a t work, ner, when, a t th e tap o f the bèll, they was to alt by the window; and aa my
A Private
to her old form yet. Pa fought
board.”
trunk had a stand there, 1 had perforce
either
turning their reels or stitching must rise and march out.
“ W h y not?”
School
l shoe aolee, which find a ready sale, for
A t precisely » 5 8 "tattoo” rings out to alt on the trunk; and a trunk can be
“ 'Cause some of theee fellers sot,
Mothers wiU find Mrs. Winslow's Sooth
, a Chinaman who want barefoot would d e e r and distinct over the campus .and Improved upon aa a place af continuous
to me, lik e th a t waa what they was
ing Hyrup the beet remedy to naa tor their
repose.
I
have
sat
upon
It
for
hours,
he
uterly
disgraced.
Why,
even
the
tolto
the
tired
"middy”
to
get
ready
for
tr y in ’ to get away fro m .”
ohlldren during the teething period.
beggars here wear shoes, although the bed. In five minutes be to Just about tailor faahlon, mending my clothes,
when
my
very
soul
loathed
the
needle
,
rest
of
their
apparel
may
ba
aver
ee
crawling under the coven, and as soon
After (h< RcccscUiattoa.
"She married a poet, d id n 't she?
scanty.
" It wad an acrobatical feat to drees In
as the last resounding note of “tape”
And to he successful?”
Dooley—
Say, Hooley, gin me a
“Another thing worthy of mention la has become Inaudible tbe lights are that room In the morning. 1 never shall
“ Oh, yes, rem arkablyf go. W hy,
punch
on
th*
jaw opposite phwere
forget
some
of
my
maddening
struggles
his name is a household word on two ; tha fact that nothing la wasted in this tam ed out by a switch key In the of-
yes kicked me.
, lend of the ‘Chinks.* Grass sad all floe and tbe tataro admiral doses off In to g e t Into my clothes In two square
continents,
and
last
year
his
income
Hooley— Phat for.
. " I ww up in tbe m ill district today.
kinds of roots are palled up, washed to alnmberland, to dream of the days feet e f apace. For six months I never
waa nearly 9300.
. Dooley— I want yes to straighten
F rig h tfu lly noisy up there. ”
knew
how
my
back
hair
looked,
for
It
and dried, end w ed for fuel. Scrape of to coma and toe glories of the navy.
out me face.
“ T h a t’s righ t. I ’vrf got a friend
was too dark over by the glass to aee.
Mr. fi’i Supposition
paper and doth are pasted together to
who lives up there.
H e c a n 't hear
M
y
destructive
tendencies
came
ent
C
H
E
A
P
T
R
A
V
E
L
IN
D
E
N
M
A
R
K
.
,
make
the
insoles
of
shoes,
and
bits
of
“ Since Spiffing lost his teeth he
H o —How do you feel when I beat
himself ta lk in hie hoaae. ”
can’t speak distinctly nor eat proper . wood are glued together to build up P rice o f T ick ets la G overned h r the strong, for I palled down first the cur
you at whist?
" M y ! Boiler shop n e x t door?”
Clarence—
W
h
y
do
you
M
y
the
tains over my clothes, and then those at
either a post or a board. The woman
food,” remarked M r. Bloomfield.
Tim a Consum ed e e Journeys.
She— N ot quite ao bad as you feel
“ No, H e's deaf and d um b.”
A
the window, pole and a ll I had to wedding was patriotic?
spinners and straw platen earn 2 cent»
Denmark was absolutely tbe pioneer
when your friend Jenkins, beata you at
Algernon—
W
ell,
the
bride
waa
red,
keep
a
good
many
things
In
my
trank,
• a «lay. This may seem small pay, bat to cheap railway fares. Tbe tares were
poker.
not so when f- tell you that 1 am in reduced all around, so that tbe longer and whenever I wanted to get at them the groom was white and. ner father,
who
had
a
ll
the
bills
to
pay,
was
formed that gs a year wtU clothe a the distance the greater the reduction, < had to first remove a mass of books,
blue.
. —------------- A * —-
er to build than yon expected?”
Chinaman and "his wife, finch a thing but a t tbe earns time tbe return ticket papers and manuscript from the lid. or
“ Oh, no, I ’ve only spent twice as
aa underwear to not known by them, system was abolished fo r jouismya else open It and let them slide down
mach o« it, go for. aa-{ anticipated ”
behind. I had to alt on my trunk to
. neither is A garment ever fitted, and a w ithin Denmark.
~
-
play my typewriter, because neither of
Utica dressmaker would starve to
One of the greatest boons to business
death hero.. The only measures that men and holiday makers Is the so-called the chairs was high enough.“
“ Sue had been married three times
"And ao you hate the half bedroom?"
You may as well ta lk about going are taken - are from the hip to the
fertalgbtly tic k e t For third ctoga It
before she got her present husband,
For Others.
"Well* no; 1 don’t know that F do.
w ithout eating as going
without ground. Fashions never change. Take
hadn’t she.”
fences.
H you have a house and two or three yards of material, aew It costs 22a 8d and tor second clam t 1 15s That hall bedroom witnessed my first
“ I t sounds funny to bear you ta lk
fid. finch a ticket entitles the holder to triumph. 1 get my first ebeeff there;
“ Yea, and be to such a patriotic
“ home you must have a fence around together, run a tape through the top.
ing
that
way.
Whan
we
were
at
co
l
travel nU ever Denmark for a term <20, for a 2(000-word story. When I
man she calls him her glorious
it.
I f you have a farm you must end haul It together, and you have the
of 14 days. H e can go wherever he opened the envelope andsaw that check lege you d id n ’t believe in eternal Fourth.
m ark ita boundaries by fences, and drees made.
punishment a t a ll. ”
—
’
etoo shut in the stock w ith feneea. “ T9w I'Chlghg* firo ro ty economical, cares to go and as many time« over Ig r o w fa ln t I t was the revulaton after
" I know, but I d id n ’t have any
the
osato
route
aa
he
assy
wish
within
A fence - is in many wsyaae im port- and 1 gneaa you w ill think that they
elk months of grim, heartrending deter
Halt's Cs
ant aa a m an’s house. A aacom m un- bfive need to be when I tell yon that the time paid for—namely, fourteen mination. Then I toughed end cried
Sniffs— Thera to more sin in C hi
>«. tato«
days. A holiday-maker may visit every
ity grows the subject of fences assumes
cago than in any otbei c ity on the
osta.br
the unskilled laborers are only paid place of Interest la Denmark during and grew hysterical. Anyone with any
more and m ort prominence.
face pf the earth.
upon an average of 7 cents a day. Ma that time and I f be finds any pleasure experience could have told me that one
The succeas of the “ Anchor” fence
Snuffa— I beg to differ.
sons, carpenters and stonemasons are In traveling from town to town night swallow did.not make summer, but to
in the United States hue been phe
“ I defy you to name another Witt»
the ktng-plna here In labor circles, re and day for the period he cab do so. me it was the beginning of success.
nomenal for the chief reaaoh th a t it
more sin in i t . ”
And ao It proved. I have net lived la
combines eooaooay,. strength
and ceiving the munificent sum of 28 to 90 He pays the price of 96.40. with a de a hall bedroom since.“
v - *
“ C in cin n ati. ”
**H9 can’t be a good business man.
cento a day. The work dfiy hers be-' posit e f 91-87 for tbe tick««, on which
beauty in a way that instantly ap
“And n o v r
W hy, he to a collage profeasor.”
gins
at
sunrise
and
lasts
until
dark,
a photograph of the holder to pasted,
peals to everybody.
In the Eaateru
The woman, who had arrived was el-
The Jays ef Neese Chasing.
“ But he has married tbe daughter
Tbe beat dressing for black leather to
states , where it has been known lon- but notwithstanding all thia the labor- and at the expiration of tbe 14 days lent, and looked straight ahead of her.
of a m illio n aire.”
• ~
'
Hubby—
A h, m y dear, you see I
orange
Juice.
Take
a
slice
or
quarter
g ^ l the factories m aking it are era seem contented and happy.
be returns the ticket and gets the 9157 Then she laughed and rose suddenly.
“So much Io regard to tbe people, and deposit back.
— —
•< “1 wish I could ever be as happy of an orange and rub It thoroughly all have come home from the office an
pressed to fu ll capacity.
In th ia
hour earlier than usual I
state, whereat to comparatively new, now perhaps a few words In regard to
H e can also buy a ticket for a month, again aa I waa when I got that check.” over the shoe or hoot and allow I t to
W ile — Oh, you dear, good m a n ! I
“ You want the pockets to run np its widespread adoption seems to be the officials of the city, particularly the which costo 66 per cent more, and the
dry.
Then
brash
briskly
w
ith
soft
she said.—New York Sun..
and down, I suppose,"said tbe tailor. only a question of the agents getting policemen, may Interest you. In the longer the time the greater tbe reduc
brash nntll It shines Ilka a looking- was just wondering who I could get
“ No, a ir,” th e irritab le customer around and showing th eir wares to first place, a Chinese policeman to a tion. While a fortnightly ticket coats
glass. A moat convenient dressing for to take uptheae carpets!
replied. “ I prefer stationary pook- the people.
wonderful creation; In fact, a cress be 55«, a twelve-month ticket costa 950.
ton shoes to the Inside of a banana akin:
A Mm ef Carnage.
eta. You may make the elite perpen
Thia to rubbed well and avenly all over
There is ample reason for a ll tbe tween a clreua clown and a football I f tbe passenger had to pay for a
dicular, however.”
tbe shoe, and removing ell spots and
ta lk going on about the “ anchor” player. His breeches are always baggy twelve-month ticket nt the rate of 96.60
She— I d id n ’t suppose you had the
fence, as it to solving the great fence and heavily wadded; in fact, ao clumsy per fortnight It would coat him 9188.60.
dirt as well ao giving a fine polish, nerve to kisa me.
problem satisfactorily. I t is not only that you wonder how la tbe world be Thus the redaction to over- 160 per
H e— Oh, yea, I have got nerve
which tost to brought out by using a
well adapted to ornamental work, ever goto around In them. He also
flnannel cloth for wiping dry and an enough to do anything.
M r U b a ta t a t CUUraa.
but it to the biggest kind of a blefising wears a coat which to thick and clumsy
other clean flannel for polishing. A
to stock raisers and ranchmen gener- and cornea well below the knee. Dark-
slice of lemon to also used aa a ta i
a liy . I t is mode of heavy wire and blue Is the general color, which Is set
leather dressing, r a t ent leather moat
the joints are held rivet-tig ht by the off with facings hud bunds of light
never be Macked or polished with any
patent “ anchor” clamps.
I t does Mue, red, green, maroon and brown,
thing bnt an oil. They are the hardest
not coat aa much aa the old-fashioned bnt no yellow la ever used, for that Is
kind of ghoea to keep in good order. It
fences, yet it lasts practically forever. tbe sacred royal color, and ao one bnt
to necessary to take a dean sponge and
I t ' to worth anyone’s w hile to write those of blgb rank are allowed to wear
clean them from all dirt before apply
“ Tom m y, bow many w a n has
to the manufacturers, The Portland I t Policemen are thicker than huck
ing the oil. It may then be robbed dry
United States been engagedinT”
Anchor Fence Co., 748, Nicolai Street, leberries In thia city of Pekin, there
St once w ith a flannel or other soft
"F ive* s ir.”
Portland, Oregon, for catalogue and being. It Is said, between 15,000 and
cloth which will not scratch the patent
“ Enumerate th e m .” '
pictures explaining th e ir wonderful 20,000 e f them within tbe walled city.
fiufah O b W fiW tal Tribnna.
“ One, two* three, four, five.”
"This walled city to two miles square
nnd has two great gates in each wall
Alas for Aspirations!
Why a Hay b Uka a Cigar.
base, about half a mile from the cor
Old
Gentleamn—
So
you
th
in
k
my
H e n r y J. Byron, one of the w it
ners, and a mile from each other. The
tiest of English playwrights of a daughter loves you, air, and you wish
streets are broad and stretch straight
___________ '
acore of yean ago, remarked on one to marry hex? _
Dudejeigb— That's what I called to from one to tbe other, making the
occasion:
“ A play is like a cigar. I f i t ’s see yoti about. Ia there any insanity space Inside Into a Mg nine-block. The
police stations are scattered all along
good, everybody wants a box.
I f i t ’s in your fam ily?
the nine squares. The head of the
bad, a ll tbe puffing in the world
police has charge of all the city gates, 1
won’t make it go.”
they being nine In nnmber. Tbe po
licemen never carry any arma, not
even a stick, but keep swords, apeare, <
guns and cntlaaaea In racks at the eta- '
tlon, and when a signal gun to fired 1
make a rush for the station from ’
which tbe sound cornea and grab tbs 1
first weapon In sight When on parade 1
or when they have a review, which to '
taste seed. Mat than« Ilk« candy. T h e y
remove any bad tasta In th« Inouth. leav
quite often, to the only time they are 1
ing th« breath awa«t aad parfunMd. I t to
armed, especially If they expect any 1
a pleasure to taka them, aad they are
llkad m paclally by children.
foreign devils to be present
The 1
■w M tan th« stomach by elm n slax th«
weapons are fanny looking, particular- 1
mouth, throat and fond channel. T h a t
SWEETEN
ly a savage looking three-booked spear, 1
mean«, they «top uadtseeted rood from
1 souring In tha stomach, prevent gas fo rm
which makes a terrible. Jagged wouud. 1
THE STOMACH
ing la tha bowel*, and k ill dlaeaaa germs
o r any kind th a t breed aad f««d la tha en
“BestA 19753
'
»n within 1
CASTOR IA
Us (M Tu Km Alwijt tapt
tire systam.
are purely vegetable end contain no m er
curial or other m ineral poison. They ooa-
■Ist of the latest discovert« In medicine,
and form a combtaatloa af retaodtas tm -
equaled to Stake tbe blood pure and rich
and mako etaaa skin aad to a o tlfu l co w
plezloa.
tone th« «tomach and bowels and «tlr up
tbs lasy llv tr. They do not merely soften
tha ato«ls and c a tu t th eir discharge, hut
Strengthen th« bowel» and put theta into
lively, healthy condition, making their ac
tion natural.
never grip nor grtpe. T hey act quietly, pos
itively and never cause any kind of nnnim
fortabla feelldg. Taken regularly they make
tha Ilv e r a e t regularly and n atu rally as It
Should. They keep the sewerage of the body
properly moylng and keep tbe «y»tea clean.
Increase the flew o f m ilk In nursing m oth-
era. I f tbe mother eats a tabtat. It makes
her m ilk m ildly purgative aad has a mild
but certain effect on the baby- In thia way
they are tha only aafa laxative fo r the
nursing Infant.
taken patiently, peraletently. w ill cure any
form ot constipation, no m atter hpw q|d or
how often other remadtaa have fafo d. They
are absolutely guaranteed to cure say Caarn
or purchase money w ill be cheerfully re-
» À fi» ïW