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About Street roots. (Portland, OR) 1998-current | View Entire Issue (March 1, 2013)
Street roots March 1, 2013 Losing it - or maybe not After a diagnosis of bipolar disorder, illustrator Ellen Forney worries medication will wipe out her creativity BY JIM DOUGLAS Forney rides the roller coaster so familiar to people being treated for bipolar disorder. he extreme and unpredictable highs Unpredictable periods of mania and and lows that come with bipolar depression lead to changes in medication. illness can be like having a When a blood draw shows negative effects, frightening head “full of frantic rats.” And she has to stop taking the medication even even with treatment, the symptoms may though it is helping her symptoms. continue seemingly without relief. Family Expressive cartoons illustrate her reactions and loved ones, as well as the person to the many different medications. (These suffering the problematic behavior, can feel reminded me of the humorous conversation mystified and frustrated by its seemingly in the Oscar-nominated film “Silver Linings inexplicable nature. Playbook” between the characters played by Ellen Forney’s “Marbles” may help. It is Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence, in an engaging, unsettling and informative look which they discuss the effects of the various at the author’s own experience with the medications they’ve taken for their mental illness, unique in that it is a graphic novel, illness.) rather like a black-and-white “comic book.” In her efforts to gain stability, the author Forney’s illustrations add an element to her does yoga, tries to make herself swim and descriptions that words alone cannot create. keeps a journal of her medications and her The author is a cartoonist whose work moods. She uses what she learns from regularly appears in Seattle weekly, The Karen in cognitive behavioral therapy to Stranger. She illustrated Sherman Alexie’s “talk back to the internal critic,” listing her “The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time “automatic critical thoughts” and the Indian” and teaches at Cornish College of corresponding and more accurate “rational the Arts. She is not shy in describing the responses.” She also learns to be more - lengthy process by which she attempts to open about admitting that she has a mental come to grips with — and achieve some illness and confides in the few friends who relief from — her condition. are able to accept the variation in her Diagnosed at about age 30, Forney moods without being judgmental. describes her treatment with a psychiatrist But, perhaps above all, because she is an throughout the entire book. However, she is artist, she sketches. “Marbles” includes slow to completely buy into the idea that some of those drawings, which very treatment might actually help. She worries effectively capture the moods she that controlling her mania with medication experiences. Although the story line in the will squelch her creativity: book is drawn in a very straightforward way “Art was my blood, my heart, my life.” When she was first diagnosed, “the sense of with simple, bold lines, the sketches vary significantly depending on how the author is heaviness was alleviated by a back-handed feeling at the time and what emotion she is sense of cred.” She imagines herself as a r P i V 'r T n q fT----- -■ - member of “Club (Vincent) van Gogh: Despite all these efforts, the author Eccentric! Passionate! Tortured! Scary! continues to experience periods of mania, Deadly! Fire! Ice! Unmoored! Unbridled! during which she “perseverates,” unable to Unpredictible! (sic) Dangerous! I was let go of her frustrations. And she has bouts officially a crazy artist.” of depression, which leave her with only She resists taking medication and enough energy to get from bed to couch and experiences a succession of increasingly back. She has problems with her memory. manic episodes. As her thinking becomes There is a cartoon drawing of Forney in a more and more revved up, her cartoon rowboat, being pulled away from shore by a illustrations almost vibrate, and her words wave that is filled with symbols of her wrap around her head. Finally, desperation illness. She says, “I was sideways, I was leads her to put herself in the hands of upside-down, too energetic to be depressed, Karen, the psychiatrist. But taking lithium too anxious and sad to be manic.” makes it “official.” She is “crazy.” C O N T R IB U T IN G W R IT E R T Marbles: Mania, Depression, Michelangelo, and Me, by Ellen Forney 2 1 1 in fo CGNTRAICITY fY W W T l If you need help with any of the following: Food Resources, Health Care, Public Agencies, Legal Services, Employment Changing Lives Building Communities Creating Opportunities Resources, Counseling/Support Groups Housing/Emergency Shelter and Much More! From your cell: 503-222-5555. Throughout the book, Forney has a constructive rapport with her psychiatrist P H O T O BY j a c o b peter f e n n e l l and is o p en ab o u t h e r th in k in g and activities, with one exception. She doesn’t reveal to Karen that she has held onto her pre-diagnosis habit of regularly smoking marijuana. It is only after several years of treatment that she is able to resolve this issue. Forney’s description of her mental health challenges offers great insight into the ways bipolar illness affects people and their overwhelming challenges to gain stability. Her insight may also provide reassurance to people who are going through a similar experience. Reprinted from Real Change, Seattle, Wash. Pacific Power wants to invest me money in coal plants without proper analysis of other option ? tffiggPbsing coal plants ea is good for your pocketbook and the planet. four membership gives us the power to fight Pacific Power’s coal investments! ' “ Support CUB today. http://oregoncub.org/streetroots w w w .c e n tr a lc ity c o n c e r n .o r g 5 0 3 -2 9 4 -1 6 8 1 C it iz e n s ’ U t ilit y B o a rd M any thanks to all o f our volunteers who contribute their tim e a n d energy toward Street Roots! Inquire about volunteeringatwww.streetroots.org/volunteer. ■I
