street roots
13
April 1, 2010
Readers chime in on Street Roots coverage, other stuff
I f you have a question fo r
Street Roots Managing
Editor Junie-bug Zoloft,
write to her a t
juniebugforever®
streetroots.org.
Dear Editor,
My 12year-old son picked up one o f your
newspapers from a man outside of Powell’s
last week, only to fin d two uses of thefiword,
and a “sh-t. ” I know you think you’re doing
something positive for the people who sell your
paper, but you have to
realize that little
children are reading
ASK THE
this. They are buying
EDITOR.
the paper on the streets
6 0 AHEAD’
and learning these
words from you. Please
do not undermine the
ability o f parents to
raise their children to be respectful citizens.
Reed College protesting the media’s portrayal
o f Reed as some kind o f heroin capital. A t
least two dozen people turned out and sat
down in protest. There wasn’t even a mention
of it in your paper, which is supposed to
represent us. Is it too much to ask that you
take the time to send out one of your reporters
to organizing meetings around these events, or
are you just too good for us these days?
The people need to stand up and take back
the power, and there’s a lot of empowerment
happening out there. We at least thought Street
Roots would be interested in what the “little”
people are doing.
-ANARCHY BLUE
-LINDA
Dear Anarchy,
Thanks! Great points!
Dear Linda,
Point taken, Linda. Thanks for the sharp
eye!
Dear Editor,
How come I never see a Street Roots reporter
at the cop protests or the war rallies? Or the
Columbia River Crossing demonstrations?
Other media are out there, why not Street
Roots? The recent Recall Sam Adams
campaign rally brought out KGW, KATU, The
Oregonian, The Williamette Week, The
Portland Mercury and OPB, but no Street
Roots! A nd last month there was a sit-in at
Dear Editor,
I ’m looking at buying a condominium in
Portland’s inner Southeast Neighborhood.
What do I need to know about homeless people
in your city before I arrive?
-ROBERT
A lot! Thanks for writing, Robert!
Dear Editor,
So, you’re a homelessness newspaper. I f
that’s really true, as you claim, than how come
you charge a dollar for it? Is that why people
are panhandling in downtown Portland, to
raise money to buy your paper?
-DENNIS
Hi Dennis. Actually we’re not a
“homeless” newspaper and we don’t use
that term. We .were created more than 11
years ago by people on the street who
wanted a voice in their community as
policies and attitudes were painting them
into a corner. That said, our coverage in the
paper has grown to encompass many issues
of social and economic justice, interesting
personalities and our local culture. And our
readers are people who care about those
issues. Our vendors are homeless and low-
income residents, who often give the paper
for free to people who don’t have any money
to pay for one, because people on the street
know we cover the issues important to
them.
Regarding the second part of your
question, we don’t have a clue why people
are panhandling in downtown Portland.
Dear Editor,
I would read your paper more i f you printed
more positive and entertaining articles.
-TIFFANY
So would we, Tiffany! Thanks!
Drink up, but don’t get caught sipping the liberal Kool-Aid
D
/oh« Q.
Paytreeut knows
what's good for you.
Teabagge-, I mean, Tea Partier:
( ear
Lipton vs. Earl Grey. Any thoughts?
-CURIOUS
Dear Curious,
Earl Grey? Who the hell is he? Sounds
like some kinda limey commie socialist to
me. Our original Tea Party brethren didn’t
throw off the monarchical fist of our British
oppressors just so we
could wind up filling
ASK A
the coffers of the
socialist New-World-
TEABAG... ER,
Order European
TEA PARTIER
Union 250 years later.
Show your true colors
(which don’t bleed) by
always buying American, my friend. That
means Lipton, that means good ol’
American flags (which are made in China -
ed.) and that means.Toyota. Go USA!
you know what I'mean. But it’s every man
for himself, I’m afraid, just.the way God and
the'Founding Fathers intended. Universal
health' care is just secret code for a free ride
for welfare queens and illegal immigrants.
The only thing our tax dollars should go for
is killing unruly foreigners who mess with
the oil that rightfully belongs to us. I’m
talking about the Arabs and the French.
the dictionary that white is “radiated or
transmitted light containing all of the visible
rays of the spectrum,” which means it’s a
mixture of all the ... um, different colors.
Like, uh, red and yellow and ... Crap. Well, I
guess it’s not quite so pure as I thought.
Never mind. Dumb question! You should
stick to drinking coffee. Wait, that’s brown.
Dammit!
Dear Teabagger. Sorry, Tea Partier: I
recently moved to Oregon, and I ’ve encountered
chai for the first time. I t’s yummy, but like any
new experience, it can be so confusing. Can
you recommend how I might best explore its
creamy white goodness?
Dear Teabagger. Oops, I mean, Tea Partier:
I ’m dreadfully sorry, but I seem to have gotten
lost. I followed a curiously anthropomorphic
rabbit down a hole and found myself in the
midst o f the strangest tea party. A nd there’s a
shrill red queen named Palin who’s calling for
the heads of people she calls “liberals. ” Her
folksy fascism has given me quite a splitting
headache. Do you have any advice on how I
might fin d my way home?
A w Teabag-. Doh! My bad. Tea Partier:
Tea is such a healthy drink. What do you
think about imposing a 1-cent tax on it that
could go toward universal health care,
something that would benefit all o f us as a
society? After all, we’re all in this together,
aren’t we?
-METHE PEOPLE
Dear Me,
oil m it int- ciirp Knpp-deen in it. if
-MYWAYORTOWAY
Dear MWOTCW,
Chai? That wouldn’t be short for “Chai-
nese” would it? Because they own us lock,
stock and pork barrel, thanks to those
scheming traitors in Congress. Might as
well be wearing gray dungarees with little .
red stars on ’em and singing Papa-ooh-Mao-
Mao, you know what I’m saying? On the
other hand, this chai stuff you’re talking
about is white, you say? Now, that’s a good
thing, because white means clarity. White
means American. Saying that don’t make
me a racist You can look it up for yourself
in the Bible or any of Glenn Beck’s books.
White is pure. Heck, it says right here in'
DETOUR
3035 S.E. Division • Portland, OR 97202
503.234.7499
.. —ALICE, AGE 7
Dear Alice,
You sound like a polite, bright little girl,
darling. But did you know that under the
forced-down-our-throats health care reform
bill you would have been aborted well before
you lived to become so well-spoken? Think
about th a t Now, you must excuse me. I’m
late for a very important date to spit on a
congressman.
Next week: Ask a Mad Hatter