Local S tu ff
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Save the Shuttle!!!!
( In the interest o f full disclosure; Your beloved editor rides
the shuttle regularly, it is part of the reason he can live in
Toiovana and work in Cannon Beach, and not own a car.)
Some folks don’t even know that Cannon Beach has a
free Natural Gas powered Shuttle bus that runs every
half hour from Les Shirley Park to Toiovana every
day. Yep, from lOAm until 6PM you can get from
one end o f town to the other and back for free. There
is a donation requested, but it's free if it needs to be.
The shuttle was started as a reaction to proposed oil
drilling off the Oregon Coast. Folks figured if we
didn't want people to make a mess on the beach
looking for oil, maybe it would be a good idea not to
use so much of it driving personal gasoline powered
cars. It was also seen as a way to get folks to and from
work without filling the limited parking spaces in
Cannon Beach with employee’s cars, and let them
become customer parking. With this in mind, the
business community voluntarily taxed themselves to
fund the shuttle. It's been working for years and has
just come off its most spectacular summer yet, and
depending on who's doing the counting, has started to
break even. So, we were surprised to hear that the City
was talking with Sunset Transportation about
providing Shuttle Service in Cannon Beach.
“So the folks from Seaside will decide the schedule,
the stops and the fair. No, it won't be free. No, they
probably won't drive a block or two off the route, to
take an elderly woman up a steep hill in the rain to her
doorstep. No, they probably won't let Barkley (local
doggie legend) ride around alone. Nor will they
probably be willing to wait while someone runs into
the store to grab a forgotten carton of milk, like the
shuttle does now!”
Needless to say after these thoughts entered my
head I went looking for a City Official with blood in
my eyes. John Williams was the easiest to find behind
the poker machine at the Driftwood.
“The shuttle is doing a wonderful job and if anything
we should encourage it to grow and continue to reflect
the unique nature of this community to visitors and
locals alike, rather than sell it off to the highest bidder,
because it's 'too much trouble!”, I raved, as he sipped
his cocktail and smiled. After I calmed down and
talked to a few more people, it became clear that the
talks with Sunset, were just that. They want to widen
their service area, and send buses to Manzanita and
south, they are interested in Natural Gas vehicles for
their fleet, they are by all reports decent and
honorable employers who offer good wages and
benefits to their drivers. It might workout that they
will help us expand the Shuttle’s effectiveness. Who
knows? The Energy Committee will be talking about
this for a while, and I encourage people to let them
know how you feel about the Shuttle
(Tradition; n. a long established custom.)
We are informed that there is a "new tradition" in
town. New tradition is a glaring oxymoron. It is as
wrong as First Annual. Annual events and traditions
can’t exist, by definition, until they have occurred at
least once.
The traditional lighting of the lighthouses, we are
told in the local paper of record, will take place for the
first time this year in the Hemlock Corridor. Which we
assume means downtown. It seems the Good Ol'
Persons at the Chamber of Commerce, have talked
some folks into buying into a scheme to put solar
powered 'elegant' lighthouses, to be built soon, on the
poles that currently hold the flower boxes, and
traditionally, for decades, in winter, held the holiday
lamps. (How then plan to light the solar powered
lights in the rain is something we are sure they would
be delighted to explain, but we were just too tired to
ask.) Each lighthouse (they plan to have 24
eventually) will be dedicated to the memory of
someone in the community who has died, or in the
case of Georgia and Bill Hay to commemorate 50
years o f the Hallmark Resort. Oh, and they cost $425
each. We suppose since the Tillamook Lighthouse is
now used as a sort graveyard for the very rich and
odd, this makes some sense to someone, but to us it
seems more than a little bizarre. Not as bizarre as
some folks imagine, there are no plans, for instance, to
actually have the ashes o f the dear departed lodged in
the lighthouses, and the light on top will not rotate.
That might give the town a festive excitement, but it
might also cause flashbacks among our local sixties
survivors. And we don’t think Bill Hay gets to hang a
VACANCY sign on his. In fact some folks on the
Design Review Committee have raised some questions
about the ‘premier year for the lighthouses’ and the
Chamber ‘unveiling’ might have to wait for the
Second Annual New Traditional Lighting of the
Lighthouses, or something.
It is redundant to say we have an 'old tradition'
around here, but, we are traditionally wary of
oxymoron’s, like military intelligence, environmental
development, republican party, wilderness
management, and new tradition.
What's that in their hands? BELLS! The National Anthem is
going to be rung by kid bell ringers. Another first. Oddly
enough, it was quite effective. The voices of the few folks who
sung wove in and out of the bell-sounds in time with the
scoreboard flag There were no paint-splash rockets issuing a
"red glare o f bombs bursting in air".
The Rays score early and often. John Flaherty, at home on
his old turf, blasts a two-run double to start off the first
inning.
When the Tigers come up to bat, Arrojo seems tentative.
Luis Polonia leads off with a single. Brad Asmus gets hit by a
pitch. First two on and none out. Looks like a long night for
Rolando. But the Tigers' roar is soon reduced to a purr as
Frank "The Cat" Catalanotto strikes out and Dean Palmer
smacks a hard one into a double play (one o f five for the day
for The Rays).
That's about it. The Rays keep scoring. McGriff hits a
massive upper-deck home run in the sixth to pretty much
settling things. The Rays win 9-1. Arrojo wins his first
game since going on the DL in May.
As we leave Tiger Stadium for what is probably our last
time, the kids are lining up on Trumbell Street to run the
bases. Their line snakes around the comer and down the street.
The air is heavy and I have to stop to catch my breath. We
don't have much in the line of relics. Rosalie bought a cap for
someone. I have a scorecard. No chips of brick nor tufts of
turf. Just a few more items for the memory bag.
Frank Walsh is a poet, calligrapher, and book lover. As a
boy, he and his aunt lived for several winters in the Suwannee
Hotel in St. Petersburg, where the New York Yankees stayed
during spring training. There he met all of the great Yankees
o f the 30s, including Babe Ruth and Lou Gehrig
C annon B each O utdoor W ear
We Carry Clothing that
makes you feel greatl
Patagonia
Teva
Woolrich
Kavu
Graniteci & More
Lotsa Good Stuff On Sale
239 N. Hemlock, Cannon Beach
Open Daily, 11-5 436-2832
Oprah calls Uncle Mike!!!!
Yes, the rumors are true. We were sitting in the comfortable
and well lighted headquarters of the Upper Left Edge, when the
phone suddenly rang. ‘What?” we answered. *ls this the
Upper Left Edge? My name is Jenna, and I’m with the Oprah
Winfrey Show and I’m trying to get in touch with Uncle
Mike,” the caller said. We explained that for reasons too tragic
to mention we no longer took personal nor, especially,
business calls for Uncle Mike, but if she must talk to him she
would have to call the bookstore where he launders the tons of
money he makes writing ponorgaphic novels for internet
providers in Amsterdam. It seems Oprah was doing some
show about * unusual advice’ and they went looking for a
‘male* advice columnist and found Uncle Mike @
www.upperldtedge.com. (Click it, Ophra did!) Well, in spite
o f the odds, she actually got in touch with Uncle Mike. They
spoke, and Oprah’s people gave a ‘test’ question. "What is the
one thing you would not like to see your mate do in front of
you?A Uncle Mike hemmed and hawed, as he sat in the
bookstore facing endless shelves of romance novels and said,
‘Read a book with Fabio on the cover.” ...Well, I’ve heard
that Oprah’s bedroom is papered with Fabio paperback
covers... So, it comes down to this: Uncle Mike and Oprah
have decided to ‘just be friends’. Breaks your heart.
----- wMñroaBTAHáDoñ-----------------------
C—«— « B m oh: JupSeCz Rare and lived Books.
O abum 'z Oroceiy. The Cookie Co.. CoOee CabaAa.
B ille Tavern. Cannon Beach Book CO.. Hane'e
Bakerle. The Btelro, Midtown C aff. Once Upon a
Breese. Copies * Tax. Haystack Video, M ariner
M arket. Espresso Bean. Ecola Square * O eankns
S u rf
M ansan lta. Mother Nature s Juice Bar.
Cassandra's, M ansanlta News * Espresso. •
Nehalem Bay Video
Bookawayt Neptune's Used Books
T illa m o o k : Rainy Day Books * Tillamook Library
Bay C ity: A it Space
Tachata: By-the Sea Books
Pacific C ity: The River House.
O eeanaM a Ocean Side Espresso
L in c o ln C ity : Trillium N atural roods. Driftwood
Library. A Lighthouse Brewpub
Newport: Oceana N atural roods. Ocean Pulse Surf
Shop. Sylvia Beach Hotel, ft Canyon Way Books
Bugeras: Book M ark. C aff Navarra. Eugene Public
Library, Friendly St. M arket. Happy Trails.
Keystone C aff. Klva roods, Lane C.C., Light For
M usic. New Frontier M arket. Nineteenth Street
Brew Pub. Oasla M arket. Perry s, Red Barn Oroceiy.
Sundance Natural Foods, U of O, ft WOW Hall
C o rva llis : The Environm ental Center, OSU
Salem : Heliotrope. Salem Library, ft The Peace
Store
A storia: KM UN . Columbian C a ff, The Com munity
Store, The W et Dog Cafe. Astoria CoOee Company.
C a ff Uniontow n, ft The River
Seaside: Buck's Book B am . Universal Video, ft
Café Espresso
P ortland : Artichoke Musk:. Laughing llorse
Bookstore. Act III. Barnes ft Noble. Belmonts Inn.
Bibelot A rt Gallery. Bijou C aff. Borders. Bridgeport
Brew Pub. Capt'n Beans (two locations I. Center for
the Healing Light. CoOee People (three locational.
Com mon Grounds Coffee. East Avenue Tavern,
Food Front. Goose Hollow Inn. Hot U ps Pizza. Java
Bay C a ff. Key Largo. La Pattlsaerle. Lewis ft Clark
College, Locate Only. Marco's Pizza. M arylhurst
College. M t. Hood CC, Music Millenium. Nature's
(two locational, NW N atu ral Gas, OHSU Medical
School. Old Wives Tales. Ozone Records. Papa
H aydn. PCC (four locations I. PSU (two locational,
Reed College. Third Eye. Multnom a C entral
Library, and most branches A the YWCA.
Ashland: Oaro s Java House. The Black Sheep,
Blue M t. C a ff, ft Rogue River Brewery
C ave Junctio n: CoOee Heaven ft Kerby Community
M a rk e t
G rants Passi The Book Shop
(Out o f Oregon)
Vancouver. WAt The Den
Longview , WA: The Broadway OaUery
N a M U s . WA: Rainy Day Artistry
N a h e o tta . WA: Moby Dick Hotel
D u v a ll, W A Duvall Books
B ainbridge latend, W A Eagle Harbor Book Co.
S e a ttle . WA: Elliot Bay Book Co.. Honey Bear
Bakery. New Orleans Restaurant. Still Life In
Frem ont. Allegro Coffeehouse. The Last Exit Coffee
House, ft Bulldog News
Ban Francisco, CA: City Lights Bookstore
D en ver, Co: Denver Folklore Cente
W ashington. D .C j Hotel Tabard Inn
(O u t o f U B A .)
Paris, Franoet Shakespeare ft Cle
B rig h to n . England! The Public House Bookstore
| r~UPPER-LEF T-EDG e LI
E d ito r/P u b lis h e r /J a n ito r :
The Beloved Reverend Billy Lloyd Hulls
Graphics E dito r The Humble Ms. Sally
Louise Lackaff
C opy E ditor/Science E d ito r/V o ice
o f Reason/U nde Mike/etc.: Michael
Burgess
W ild life In fo rm a n t/M u s ic R ep o rter
at Large: Peter "Spud" Siegel
Im p ro v is a tio n a l Engineer:
Dr. Karkeys
Education E d ito r Peter Lindsey
June's Garden: June Kroft
W eb W o nd er W om an/D istribution
D iv a /S u b s c rib c r's Sweetheart:
Myma Uhlig
Bass Player: Bill Uhlig
Ecola Ilahee: Douglas Deur
Environmental News: Kim Bossé
Lower Left Beat: Victoria Stoppiello
Life on the "O ther Edge":
Meg Stivison
Local Colour: Ron Logan
Two Drinks Ahead: Darrin Peters
Web Mother: Liz Lynch
Essential Services: Ginni Callahan
Ad Sales: Katherine Mace
M a jo r Distribution: Ambling Bear
Distribution
And A Cast O f Thousands!!
Advertising rates:
Business Card Size Ad
S30.
1/16th approx. 3 x 5
S35.
1 /8th approx 4 x 7
$50.
lX4th approx. 6 1/2 x 9 $100.
1/2 page
$150.
Full page
$300.
Back page
$400.
. . . per month. Payment is due
the 15th of the month prior to
the issue in which the ad is to
appear. Camera ready art is
requested. We are usually on
the streets by the first
weekend of the month.
OREGON COAST
SUPPORT CROUP
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CAMHOM B IA C H
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»AN l o i I * * 711«
Song for Fine Weather
Capitalism as such is not evil; it is its wrong use that is evil.
Mohandas Gandhi
O good son,
Look thou down upon us:
Shine, Shine on us, O sun.
Gather up the clouds, wet, black, under thy arms.
That the rains may cease to fa il
Because thy friends are all here on the beach
Ready to go fishing—
Ready for the hunt
Therefore look kindly on us, O Good Sun!
Song from the Haida:
Queen Charlotte’s Island, B.C.Canada
Iff fLR. 1Ï.ÎT EBSL K M . W
THE OSBORNE WORKING
STUDIO & GALLERY
FINE ART,
SPECIAL EDITION PRINTS,«
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PHONE OR FACSIMILE
503 368 7518