There was an interesting little piece in the paper the other day. There are now 169 billionaires in America. Had anyone asked, we d have guessed fifty, maybe seventy-five. Not because we underestimate the naked greed of life at the top of the food chain, but because a billion dollars is a whale of a lot of money. Most of us dream of having a million. A million dollars is itself a huge bundle of money. If, for instance, one skipped lunch and managed to save $50,000 a year, it would take twenty years to become a millionaire. By reverse arithmetic, if one spent $50,000 a year in ways that left nothing to show for it but memories, it would be twenty years before you were broke. For the average peasant, a million dollars is a dream worth dreaming. A billion dollars is this dream magnified a thousandfold. A billion dollars is more pictures of dead presidents than you can count in a lifetime. A billion dollars deposited in a passbook account would earn, by its mere existance, $45 million dollars a year in interest. It is perhaps a measure of our country's greatness that there are 169 Americans who could make such a deposit tom orrow m orning. The existance of so much as one billionaire, even in America, is a wonder. Being a billionaire means that, living expenses aside, the sweat of your cleverness and talent has earned you a thousand million dollars in sheer profit. Interesting word, profit. Profit means making more than you spend, accumulating more than you dispense, absorbing more than you emit, taking more than you give. Among some cultures, profit is indistinguishable from theft. But these are backward cultures and of no consequence. Mind you we have nothing against profit. We have, in fact, nothing but praise for it. Like you, we live on profit. We go to the movies, save our little nest egg, and plan our quaint peasant future on the foundation of beating our skull against the nearest wall to make more money than we need. If all goes well, we'll retire someplace nice to have our stroke. Profit is the reward for fiscal virtue. But no matter how hard you work, how very good your work is, or how many coupons you clip, it's doubtful you'll sock away a billion dollars. Not even plumbers are that virtuous. When you get right down to it, it’s hard to imagine how anyone could come by a billion dollars honestly. If something like that happened in a poker game, someone would get shot. Nobody but nobody is that lucky or that good. That America has 169 billionaires means the deck is stacked and someone's got rules they re not sh o w in g . A truth that doesn't make the headlines much is that at no point in our country's history has its wealth been less evenly divided. Something like 95% of the chips are passed back and forth between something like 5% of the players. This doesn't make for good poker. In fact, it ends the game. Economists and historians who don't use the word 'crisis' lightly say we may be in a whole lot of trouble. To the blind, everything's a surprise. One hesitates to suggest we eat the rich, although for many Americans it would mean upgrading their diet. We'd be happy if they just paid the sort of taxes that made them millionaires. Cal, us a communist. Castle Carpet Cleaning DONALD THOM P.O. BOX 773 CANNON BEACH OR 97110 436*1114 _Mother Nature's North Coast Pride Network P.O. Box 2798 Gearhart, OR 97138 (503) 738-0215 Natural Foods • Juice Bar 298 Larieda Avenue P.O. Box 737 Manzanita, Oregon 97130 503 • 368 • 5316 — ....—m f The Columbia Pacific Region's lesbian, gay, transgendered, bisexual group standing firm against hate. N C P N now presents... the Gay Film Festival Galore. M on - S a t 10 - 5 3 0 C lo se d S u n d a y R u b b er d u c k s, to o ? Otis finds his brass fittin g s pedestal b asin s • roman tub faucets • c ducks • w hirlbath parts • cluw-ftcd t all o f his oth er m ost esotcrie plum accessories • • rubber • and and fa n cies at I 1 7 0 3 W est B u r n s id e S tr e e t P o r t la n d , O r e g o n 9 7 2 0 9 A c o m p le te e»l»l<»tfue « » fo u r p r o d u c t* I * « v a llu b le . (aoaiaswwxnwj v (1-800- M.8-0WÖ Are you someone filled with mystery and suspense? Join in a celebration of fiction that's best to read at this most mysterious time of year... ...Nahcotta, the Moby Dick Hotel on the Long Beach Peninsula, setting for New Yorker Mary Bringle’s mystery novel Little Creatures Everywhere sets the stage for the third annual Halloween workshop for mystery and suspense writers, published or hopeful. (D O N 'T BE A V IC T IM O F IN FE R IO R FRAMING) AWARNING 1287 Commercul St., Alton«, OR 97103 • Phone (503) 325-5221 M y ste r y W r ite r s ’ w o rk s h o p at the M o b y D ic k H o t e l Nahcotta, Washington ♦ October 28 - October 31 Join special guest NW writer Janet Smith, creator of “Annie MacPherson," to launch the event opening dinner a la Nero Wolfe. Workshop participants will help Mary Bringle, workshop leader, design informal seminars that focus on all aspects of mystery and suspense writing. Mary will schedule individual conferences and review manuscripts. Columbian Cafe 1114 Marin« Drlv« Astoria. OR 97103 503-325-CAFE (2233) Workshop package includes: Room, Breakfast & Dinner. Participation Limited. Sign Up Early. Hotvs Han - Frt la m - Zpm Sat lOam • 2pm Dfcmart: Wad • Sat. Opmi Spm Box 502. N. Hemlock St. Cannon Beach. Oregon 97110 dXMH HULSEY- 503-436 2M1 6 UPPLK LtfT Lbtt WICHST W15 t For More Information Call: (360) 665-4543