BEA TING
HER UP
BY MICHAEL McCUSKER
The woman had been beaten by her husband. He raped
her also, then tore up the house. Now he was in jail and she was
afraid of what he would do to her when he was released. She
called the Clatsop County Women's Crisis Service in Astoria.
She was told that a man had no legal right to hurt his
wife and that she could press charges against him. There were
other problems. Her husband's parents had the children and
refused to give them up to her. She was also addicted to
Valium. That night she called the Crisis Service a second time
and asked if anyone would take her to a hospital. She had
attempted suicide with an overdose of valium preceded by
heavy drinking of alcohol. She was afraid her husband would kill
her if she attempted to keep him in jail, she told the woman from
the Crisis Service who drove her to the emergency room. The
woman from the Crisis Service said she would accompany her
to the police station. She said it was important to fight back
against her husband's brutality. She knew first-hand about
domestic violence, the Crisis Service woman said; she had
herself been a battered wife.
Most of the women who volunteer for the Crisis Service
have been victims of domestic violence. Like a majority of the
women they attempt to help, it was initially difficult to break off
with the men who beat them. Like the woman who attempted
suicide they were afraid of their husbands or lovers. They
understand when callers continue to stay with the men who beat
them; some have called more than once.
The woman who overdosed on Valium was too
frightened to press charges against her husband. After assuring
her that she was safe from her husband, the police released him
just before she signed a statement that would have kept him in
jail.
"He was big," the woman from the Crisis Service said. "I
shrank in a corner. He looked just like the guy who used to beat
me up."
The frightened wife left the police station with her
husband. The woman from the Crisis Service thinks he moved
her out of town.
A typical case, she said. A woman held hostage, her
children the weapon used to imprison her. If she did not break
away from the pattern of violence and pain her next attempt at
suicide might succeed, or she might die from drug addiction. It
was not unlikely that she would be killed by her husband.
The Crisis Service was established in October 1979 to
help break the pattern. Most of what the women who volunteer
do is provide referral services such as medical and legal help.
They also set up sanctuaries when needed. They are often at
risk. Some have been threatened
by husbands or lovers of women they assist. They are severely
criticized by men who are alarmed by the feminist movement
and the growing determination of women to protect themselves
at a time when the violence against them has increased.
Each call received by the Crisis Service is logged. The
information confidential and the daily reports do not identify the
callers.
Here are some examples picked at random and
scrambled somewhat to protect the identities of the victims:
Woman taken to hospital, badly beaten by husband of
5 months.
Battered wife moved out of home and needs shelter
where he cannot find her.
Woman needs shelter, harassed by ex-husband.
Bringing children with her.
Woman on the run. Talked fast. Will arrive for shelter in
one hour. Afraid of husband.
Niece called. Uncle threatening her aunt.
Husband charged with kidnapping. Tried to take
children.
Woman with four kids. Husband beat her severely.
Threatened her and kids with gun. Police called. Took gun and
husband. Woman asking for shelter if she decides to leave.
Boyfriend of rape victim asks what he can do to help
her. She is withdrawn Unable to respond physically. He wants
some reading material on rape.
Woman married 9 months. Husband an alcoholic. She
lost first husband and oldest daughter in a fire several years
ago. Younger children ordered to in-laws by court. Present
alcoholic husband shouts at her after drinking every night. She
is very nervous. Needs company.
Husband brandished gun at wife and girlfriend. He took
kids and left. She wants to file assault charges. Wants names of
attorneys.
Woman called in regard to 13 year old daughter who is
having problems after short stay with dad, who lives in another
city.
Woman says husband's father a drinker and batterer.
Woman's boyfriend tried to strangle her. She also has
head injuries.
Woman beaten by husband. Put in shelter.
I
Woman afraid of motorcycle club. Wants shelter.
Woman choked by husband. Held her on bed.
Threatened her with gun.
Woman's husband jealous of her job and friends.
Poured gas all over bedroom, himself and wife. Threatened to
burn.
Unemployed husband tries to kill wife. Shot arrows at
her. Smothered her. Slapped and beat her.
Boyfriend beats woman. Kicks her out of house. She
stays one night in shelter waiting for emergency money from
family in another state.
Woman trapped at home in terror for several days.
Husband slaps her, spits and urinates on her Pulls her hair
and threatens to kill her.
Woman forced into sex. Put in shelter.
The list of abuse seems unending. More women are
assaulted by men. And the more women attempt to defend
themselves the more brutal are the men who assault them.
The times do not favor gentleness. The hardening of the nation
makes life more dangerous for women.
The women of the Clatsop County Crisis Service
struggle along Often disillusioned. Often in despair.
The calls come in.
(NORTH COAST TIMES EAGLE, 1980)
NICOLE FERENTZ
A RIGHT TO BE SAFE
BY LAURA SNYDER
“I have permission to go to the store." “He smashed my
head into the radiator until it bled." ‘He tied me up and twisted
me like a pretzel." “I'm pregnant and he threw me down on the
floor." This is not the script for a made for TV movie, nor is it
a sensational portrayal of the “myth” of violence in the home.
These and countless other stories were all told to me during
my work days at the Women’s Crisis Service (now the Clatsop
County Women’s Resource Center). In your neighborhood,
someone is beaten on a regular basis by her intimate partner.
Maybe you’ve heard those muffled shouts, maybe even called
the police. In your neighborhood, a child is being sexually
abused. A quarter of the women in your workplace were raped
as adults or as children. If you are a school teacher, you are
working with children who live with violence.
Did you know. Police officers in Astoria estimate that
60% of reported simple (meaning misdemeanor) assaults here
are domestic in nature. In Clatsop County the rate of known
child abuse is double the state average, and per capita alcohol
consumption is second only to Lincoln County. The Oregon
Criminal Justice Council reports that the county with the highest
total reported crime rate was Clatsop. Clatsop also ranked #1
in behavioral crimes, and ranked above the state average in
person crimes. Domestic and sexual assault and abuse account
for most person crimes in Clatsop County.
People most commonly ask why women stay in abusive
relationships. They stay out of fear (most women who are killed
by their partners are killed in the process of leaving the relation
ship), economic dependence, having nowhere to move to, and
the inability to act on their behalves and low self-esteem that are
one result of being battered repeatedly.
People most rarely ask why men batter, intimidate, and
in 1500 instances per year in the U.S. kill the women they claim
to love. Myth: Women’s behavior provokes beatings. Fact: No
one can make another human being hurt them. Most people
blame the victim of battering for the crime, sometimes without
realizing it. They expect the woman to stop the violence, and
analyze her motivations for not leaving, rather than scrutinizing
why the batterer keeps beating her, and why the community
allows it.
Until responsibility for acts of violence is placed on
the perpetrators we all suffer Battering is a learned behavior.
Children who are witnesses to violence often grow up to be
abusive to their partners and children: 85% of men who batter
were abused or witnessed assaults on their mothers Some
where along the line, batterers have learned that violence is
a way to gain power and maintain control over their intimate
partners and children. And somehow our culture has taught itself
that power and control is an end
Depressing? Yes. But there is hope for change, and
it comes with the establishment of a Coordinated Community
Response which has succeeded in San Diego, Minneapolis, the
state of Kentucky, and an increasing number of locales where
service providers are determined to stem the tide of family
violence and mandate the accountability of abusers.Task forces,
including domestic and sexual violence victims’ advocates, law
enforcement and prosecutors, created policies and procedures
that would deter further abuse, decrease the number of repeat
calls to the same address, and that would not re-victimize the
victims of domestic violence
This work has successfully changed the focus in domes
tic violence cases from the victim to the abuser by replacing the
age-old question, “Why does she stay?" with “How can we stop
him from hitting her?" The Domestic Violence Unit of the City
Attorney's Office in San Diego has become expert in prosecut
ing domestic assault cases without involvement from the victim,
who is often intimidated, threatened or scared by her abuser out
of cooperating with police and prosecutors. Prosecutors obtain
over 2,000 convictions per year without the victim's testimony
The Domestic Violence Unit of the San Diego Police
Department has implemented a pro-arrest policy mandating long
term treatment for batterers or substantial jail time, with priority
placed on the safety of the victims and jheir children If it took a
lifetime to learn the use of violence to control another person, it
will not be undone with a fine or a few years in jail. Officers and
detectives on this unit are trained extensively in the dynamics of
domestic violence and confront their own assumptions, biases
and privileges which might hinder their effectiveness in the field.
In one year preliminary violence reports from police increased
by 60%.
There is great potential here in Clatsop County to create
effective policy that works while fostering trust and partnership
among committed people in all facets of service to victims and
their children. It is time to move forward as a community.
October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month Take
time to think about your own neighborhood, your own workplace
The epidemic of family violence raging across the United States
is happening in your own backyard. Tell a friend or a neighbor in
an abusive situation that she has a right to be safe Find out how
to help her become safe Demand accountability for abusers.
Get involved Be aware from this October forward
Laura Snyder was Community Service Coordinator for
the Clatsop County Women's Crisis Service when she wrote this
article in 1994 She is proprietor of Lucy's Books in Astoria
CREA TE A DECLARA TION OF EQUALITY
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QyAIL IRIUIIL
SHARE THE PAIN
CALI
CLATSOr COUNTY WOMEN S RESOURCE CENTER
CRISIS LINE 325-5735
ANYTIME
ASTORIA, OREGON
97103
(503) 325-65 5 5