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Illinois Valley News, Cave Junction, Ore. Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Good Shepherd Lutheran Church
“Slices of Life”
by: Jill Perter
Riding the
gRief tRain
By: Jill Pertler
It’s a year this week since my
mom died. Most people will tell you
the initial year is the hardest because
of all the firsts. First Christmas. First
birthday. First Mother’s Day without
your mother.
I’ll admit those firsts were diffi-
cult, but I persevered. Might even be
that I’m stronger for it. To be honest,
I’m not sure.
The surprising thing, for me, about
the first year didn’t involve any of
the important firsts. It had more to do
with what you’d call everyday mo-
ments that caught me off guard.
Like, I might be brushing my
teeth, or thinking about whether we
should have chicken or pork chops
for dinner and – Bang! Something
would hit me and a memory would
rush in before I could think to stop
it.
There were times when I thought
about picking up the phone to call
her. Or days when I sensed her pres-
ence, even though I don’t suppose I
really did. I think I wanted to, you
know, believe she was close by.
Sometimes, for a moment, I’d for-
get she was gone. Then I’d remember
and it didn’t seem like the memory
could be real and I’d have to pause
“Slices of Life”
by Jill Perter is
brought to you by:
and decide what to believe and a mil-
lisecond later when I figured it out,
I’d cringe at the realization.
I guess the truth sometimes is
stranger than fiction.
One thing I’ve learned during the
past year is grief is an intimate ex-
perience. It is yours alone. Another
tenet of grief is not many people are
comfortable with it – whether it’s
theirs, or someone else’s. I know
I’m not and I’ve had a whole year of
practice. Then again, I’m not sure I’d
ever want to be comfortable – with
grief.
While grief is intimate, it is uni-
versal – an inevitable part of life. As
the days unfold, one after the other,
we do what we can to cope. We find
what works for us.
Words are a source of comfort to
me, so when I miss my mom, I write
about her. It’s my catharsis – releas-
ing emotions through written words
to provide a respite from the sadness
(sort of, in theory).
Not everyone identifies with ca-
tharsis. Rehashing a loss may seem
more painful than helpful. Death and
illness are unpleasant experiences
best left in the past when it is time to
focus on the future.
Thing is, you can’t move on at
anything but your own pace. That’s
the intimacy of grief. This is hard to
grasp: how one person can be at the
Ron VeRsteeg
Attorney at Law
“Over 20 Years Experience”
541-592-4381
435 Junction Ave., Cave Junction
end of the marathon and another still
taking baby steps – like in a dream
when you are trying to run but your
legs won’t work. The difference is
exponential; and I never was good at
math. Go figure.
So the grief train moves forward.
Day 365 and counting. I think I can.
I think I can.
At this time last year, I spent the
bulk of my moments staring back-
ward as the train left the station. Now
I am able to turn my seat and look
ahead a majority of the time. I’m
finding a balance. Some would ad-
vise me to keep my eyes focused on
the road in front of me, to ignore the
grief and get on with the fun stuff.
Life and death aren’t always
pretty. Denying this fact only serves
to deny the moments that truly are
beautiful. And they do exist. I know
this for certain because I remember.
I’ve come to believe the road ahead
is only part of it and – pain or no –
I’m bound and determined to experi-
ence it all.
Jill Pertler, award-winning syndi-
cated columnist and author of “The
Do-It-Yourselfer’s Guide to Self-
Syndication.” is collecting fans on
Facebook on her Slices of Life page.
Email her at pertmn@qwest.net; or
visit her website at http://marketing-
by-design.home.mchsi.com/.
Real Estate
Wills
Probate
Trusts
Conservatorships Business
Powers of
Attorney
Guardianships
Contracts
In the New Testament,
the Gospel of Luke, we read
of two of Jesus’ disciples
walking from Jerusalem
to the city of Emmaus,
a distance of some
seven miles. While they
were walking they were
discussing the crucifixion
of Jesus and how confused
and discouraged they
were. As they walked,
they were joined on the
road by a stranger who
asked them about the
events surrounding Jesus’
crucifixion. They related
the entire story, including
the women who had gone
to the tomb of Jesus only
to find that he was not
there ... he had risen from
the dead.
As evening approached,
these two disciples invited
the stranger to dine with
them and spend the night as
well. During dinner, when
the stranger broke the bread
for them to eat, these two
disciples realized who they
had been walking with and
talking to ... Jesus! Jesus
then vanished from their
presence and the disciples
immediately returned to
Jerusalem to give the other
disciples the good news of
Jesus appearing to them.
How much it seems
our own walk of faith
might parallel that of the
two disciples on the road
to Emmaus. We might be
confused, questioning or
even doubting. But when
we finally realize that Jesus
is speaking to each and
every one of us, we open
our eyes and realize who
he is and why he came to
earth and was crucified ...
to save us from our sins!
Church calendar:
Thursdays, 4:00 PM,
Good Shepherd
Singers rehearse
Sundays, 9:15 AM,
All-Comers Bible Class,
10:00 AM
Worship & Communion
Community Bible Church
GENTLEMAN !
Luke 18:1 - One day Jesus told
His disciples a story to illustrate
their need for constant prayer
and to show them that they
must never give up...
Ephesians 6:18 - Pray at all
times and on every occasions
in the power of the Holy Spirit.
Stay alert and be persistent in
your prayers....
Some occasions trigger our
need to pray. In these cases
prayer is linked to a specific
event. This relationship with
prayer is inculcated into
communities of faith and has
trained us to avail ourselves
of prayer based on a setting
or circumstance. Search the
Scriptures and you will not
find a designation as to when to
and when not to pray. Instead,
we are admonished to pray
and pray and pray. Bill Hybels
wrote a book with the title, “ To
Busy Not to Pray “. I believe
that the Lord really enjoys
continual communication with
those that love Him.
Mark Your Calendars
May 11th - Awanas Club
last meeting
May 14th - Ladies’ Tea
June 13th - June 17th -
Vacation Bible School
Call the church for further
information.
L AUREL C EMETERY A SSOCIATION
A NNUAL C LEAN - UP D AY
F RI ., S AT . & S UN .
M AY 20 – 22
9 A . M . - 2 P . M .
TOOLS IF AVAILABLE
Clothes
Give-Away!
Saturday, May 21
9 a.m. to 5 p.m.
Takilma Bible Church
10343 Takilma Rd.
0308
B RING
Lots of Choices
Take-out Available
The friends and family of Peter & Cheryl
Schmadeke (formerly Cheryl Raymond)
have set up a benefit account at SOFCU.
Peter has stage 3 esophageal cancer
and is being treated in Portland. The ac-
count is to assist with practical and medi-
cal needs, especially gas money for their
numerous trips. This looks to be a long
process, but their faith is high and they
trust in God for full healing.
Places of Worship
BRIDGEVIEW
COMMUNITY CHURCH
5181 Holland Loop, CJ
541-592-3923
“We celebrate God’s Presence
in our lives!”
Sunday Worship 10:30 a.m.
* * *
7th DAY ADVENTIST
265 S. Old Stage Rd., CJ
Sabbath School - 9:30 a.m.
Saturday Worship 11 a.m.
Prayer/Praise 7 p.m. Tuesday
Pastor Marvin Clark
Church (541) 955-4943
Madrone Adventist School
541-592-3330
* * *
FIRST BAPTIST CHURCH
OF SELMA
18285 Redwood Hwy., Selma
541-597-4169
Pastor Monty Pope
Sunday School - 9:45 a.m.
Worship - 11 a.m.
** *
COMMUNITY BIBLE CHURCH
Pastor Dave Gordon
113 S. Caves Ave., CJ
Office: 541-592-3896
Email: cbccca@cavenet.com
Sunday Worship - 10:30 a.m.
Christian Academy
Pre-K to 12th grade
Awana - Wednesdays - 6 p.m.
IMMANUEL UNITED
METHODIST CHURCH
200 Watkins St., CJ
Phone 541-592-3876
Pastor Charles Chase
Sunday School - 9:15 a.m.
Sunday Worship - 9:15 a.m.
Child-care for small children
* * *
ST. PATRICK OF THE FOREST
CATHOLIC CHURCH
407 W. River St., CJ
541-592-3658
Fr. William Holtzinger, Pastor
Mass - Sunday 11 a.m..
Sacrament of Reconciliation
Sunday - 10:30 a.m.
Holy Days TBA
* * *
GOOD SHEPHERD
LUTHERAN CHURCH
East River Street
& Lewis Court, CJ
Pastor Don Torala
Sunday School - 9:15 a.m.
Sunday Worship - 10 a.m.
Tuesday Youth group - 6 p.m.
Church Phone: 541-592-2290
www.goodshepherdlutheraniv.net
***
ILLINOIS VALLEY
PENTECOSTALS
987 Caves Hwy., CJ
541-592-4716 or 541-218-2792
Sunday - 2:30 p.m.
TAKILMA BIBLE CHURCH
10300 Takilma Road, Takilma
Pastor Dan Robinson
Bible Study / Prayer Time
9:30 a.m.
Morning Worship 11 a.m.
Wednesday Bible Study
7 p.m.
* * *
VALLEY EVANGELICAL
FREE CHURCH
498 Laurel Road, CJ
P.O. Box 1248
Pastor Marvin Porter
Sunday School - 9:45 a.m.
Worship Service - 11 a.m.
evfree@frontiernet.net
541-592-6160
* * *
FOUNTAIN OF LIFE
ASSEMBLY OF GOD
451 S. Junction Ave., CJ
541-592-3956
Pastor Mark McLean
Sunday School - 10 a.m.
Morning Worship - 11 a.m.
Evening Worship - 6 p.m.
Wednesday - 7 p.m.
Adult Bible Study
***
ST. MATTHIAS EPISCOPAL
CHURCH
25904 Redwood Hwy., CJ
541-592-2006
Rev. James Boston
Worship Service - 5 p.m.
1st Sunday of each month
THE CHURCH OF JESUS
CHRIST OF LATTER-DAY
SAINTS
209 S. Junction Ave., CJ
Sacrament Meet - 10 a.m.
Sunday School - 11:20 a.m.
Priesthood, Relief Soc. -
12:10 p.m.
Bishop G. Frank Sybrant
541-245-3394
* * *
#0515
Saturday, May
Oct. 14 9, 11 a.m. - 1 p.m.
$5 (includes soup refills)
Immanuel United
Methodist Church
200 W. Watkins St., CJ
Compassionate Health Care
At A Time When Needed The Most
Q. Does it cost me for Hospice care?
A. No one is refused service because of lack of
financial resources. There is no co-pay or deductible
for Hospice services when covered by Medicare or
Medicaid. Most insurance plans pay for all or a
portion of Hospice care. Other benefits vary.
Discuss your question with your selected hospice
agency if you have limited or no insurance coverage.
541-474-1193
COMMUNITY CALENDAR
Beyond Loss Support Group
Mondays ~ 2:00 - 3:30 p.m.
Mutual support ~ open to adults (over 18)