Page 2
Illinois Valley News, Cave Junction, OR Wednesday, April 13, 2005
There’s a story about a college student who went to
class wearing his bathing trunks and a raincoat. When
questioned by the instructor about his attire, the student
answered that he was sorry, but those were the only clean
clothes he had left.
So it is with a lot of men. Washing clothes is as attrac-
tive to them as having their teeth cleaned by a nervous den-
tal hygienist using an electric sander with a short cord. So
they put off washing today what they’ll have to wear
tomorrow.
A lot of young men probably still hold up a shirt and
sniff to see if it’s still wearable. If it’s marginal they’re likely
to spray deodorant on their armpits and the shirt to make
sure they’ll continue to be at least moderately attractive and
not become the cause for a public health hazard alert.
Some guys found that by leaving their dirty clothes in a
laundry basket or duffle bag long enough, the dirtiness not
only was miraculously squeezed out, but “Voila!” they also
were pressed during the process.
I, of course, am only reporting what I’ve heard and ob-
served. Far be it from me to wear dirty clothes, even if I was
only going to my least-favorite high school and college
classes. They included, but were not limited to: chemistry,
chemistry lab, algebra, physics, geometry, logic, and trigo-
nometry. However, clothing notwithstanding, I always did
well at English and snack bar, although not necessarily in
that order.
Some might have wondered in the locker room at my
pink-toned underwear. I can only say that no one ever told
me, and I was not smart enough to figure it out until too late,
that if one washes his dainties with a couple of red shirts,
the result is … colorful to say the least.
Also, the proper use of bleach long eluded me, until I
discovered that many of my shirts were fading and becom-
ing multicolored in some cases. As this was not quite stylish
enough, I quickly (it only takes me three or four disasters to
get to reality) learned when to reach for the bleach.
Washing clothes is a terrific experience for young peo-
ple, especially when they use three times as much soap as
needed. Talk about suds and duds. Also, using a clothes
drying machine can be exciting, particularly when you dis-
cover just how hot a zipper can become on a pair of pants.
Another aspect of washing clothes involves the heart-
break of mildew. This happens (I hear this; it’s never hap-
pened to me) when I’ve left … I mean, when someone
leaves wet clothing in a washer for several days. Hot days.
Now as an adult of sorts, I have all the washing help I
need at home. Ahh, life is good. Especially without men’s
pink underwear.
Skip & Liz Leahy
315 S. Redwood Hwy., Cave Junction
592-2212
Open Mondays through Fridays 2 to 7 p.m.
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Subscribe to the ‘Illinois Valley News’
Illinois Valley News
An Independent Weekly Newspaper Co-owned and
published by Robert R. (Bob) and Jan Rodriguez
Bob Rodriguez, Editor El Jefe
Entered as second class matter June 11, 1937 at Post
Office as Official Newspaper for Josephine County and
Josephine County Three Rivers School District,
published at 321 S. Redwood Hwy., Cave Junction, OR
97523
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Volume 68, No. 4
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‘Small misunderstanding’
From Jeff Mocniak
Olympia, Wash.
Myself and three friends
headed toward the Siskiyou
National Forest during our
spring break recently. We
considered it our opportunity
to get away and relax, al-
though it turned out to be
quite the opposite.
We were aware of some
controversy concerning forest
management in the Siskiyou,
and loving that wilderness,
decided to check out the situa-
tion. We arrived late, around
3:30 a.m. and decided to find
a place to camp and explore
later that day.
We headed down a road
and by a small, barely notice-
able “Road Closed” sign, and
figuring it to be an advisory of
poor road conditions, pro-
ceeded with caution.
We stopped at one of the
first places we came across
and set up camp, finally fal-
ling asleep around 4:30 a.m.
At about 5:30 a.m., we were
awakened by a pair of forest
service trucks circling us with
their spotlights directly aimed
at us. Two officers proceeded
toward us, hands touching
guns like they expected us to
pull shotguns from our sleep-
ing bags.
A J. Pino did most of the
talking, which included in-
tense questioning about my
friend’s pocket knife, and a
lecture on knives, cigarettes,
and similar matters. As Pino
proceeded to write me a $300
ticket for “entering a prohib-
ited area by special order,” a
steady stream of logging
trucks filed down the road
behind him.
We were escorted out of
the forest; told there were no
places nearby to camp; and
sent on our way.
I had only had one hour
of sleep in the last 24 hours,
and was now forced to drive
to Ashland in an attempt to
figure out what we were to do
for accommodations. Having
experienced this injustice of
“public land management,” I
ask, to who do these so-called
public lands belong to any-
way? Are visitors to your area
to be ticketed, harassed, fined
and endangered because of a
small misunderstanding of a
poorly posted area?
Is this a result of corpo-
rate interests taking over the
reins of public entities? How
are we to truly have democ-
racy in this country if some of
life’s simplest pleasures are at
the mercy of greed, corrup-
tion, and ignorance?
Amazing valley
From Gary ‘G-Dub’ Potter
O’Brien
Once again, the people of
this small, economically chal-
lenged area known as Illinois
Valley have amazed me.
I have lived in places
with neighbors like the mil-
lionaires, movie stars, rock
stars and politicians you see
on CNN. Areas that have the
type of houses we see on
“Lifestyles of the Rich and
Famous.” Cities that spend
more on Christmas decora-
tions than our town’s operat-
ing budget for a year. These
places were all called com-
munities, yet most didn’t
know who lived next door.
All were seemingly com-
munal living in a broad sense
of the word, relying on others
for all their needs. They work,
live and play in a large metro-
politan area surrounded by
other people like them.
You go to your job
everyday because it is secure,
regular pay and you know
your place. Your social life is
really at work because that is
the largest group of non-
strangers (not a stranger, but
not a friend) you know. You
gather on breaks and talk
about important subjects like
last night’s situation comedy,
reality or survival show. Or
the stats, drug addiction/
abuse, or criminal activity of
the latest star of sports de jour.
These are things you
need to know if you are going
to have something to talk
about and maybe even be
bold enough for an opinion.
You don’t watch world
news or pay much attention to
part of the proceeds go to a
“good cause.”
All of this to get me to
the point of my letter: the
Knockers Benefit, a fund-
raiser to help Holly
Shinerock, diagnosed with
breast cancer.
Like a lot of us, she has
no insurance. Saturday night,
April 2, I was lucky enough
to attend a true grass-roots
gathering of people. These
were not conservatives, radi-
cals, activists, hippies, drug-
gies, enviros, loggers, seniors,
blacks, whites, browns, yel-
lows, green, reds, established,
transients, drunks, teetotalers,
in-laws or outlaws, although
all have fit into one of these
categories at one time or an-
other.
That night was the gath-
ering of a community in the
truest sense of the word. Peo-
ple of all walks of life, all
dealing with their own needs
and toils. Some with very
little to give; some with more
than enough -- all united in a
bond of human nature so eas-
ily lost in this day and age.
A gathering the likes of
which I have never seen be-
fore in our quiet little town.
(Continued on page 3)
Pain - Stress - Injuries
Deep massage - CranioSacral Therapy
Monday - Friday by appointment
Senior Discounts - Gift Certificates
Restaurante
Announces Competition for the
9th annual Chili Cook-Off
This is a friendly competition to be held Saturday, April 16
- $10.00 Entry Fee and “Winner Takes All” -
- Carlos Will Match the Pot - Entries Limited to the First 12 -
Enter in Advance at Carlos Restaurante
- One Crock Pot Full - Ready to be Tasted & Tested -
- Open Rules with respect to Recipes -
- Blind Judging to be Based on Flavor & Taste: Not Fire -
- Peoples Choice Award will also be Given -
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Tasters—Well Wishers—and Enthusiasts Welcome around 1:15 p.m.
Cold Beers-Margaritas– Various Fine Tequilas, Available For Purchase
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‘Touch the world’
From Fred Krauss
Selma
I would like to tell the
environmentalists on the Bis-
cuit Timber Sale my thoughts
in a small poem I wrote:
I never climbed the Hi-
malayas/ I never sailed the
seven seas/ But with these
two hands I touch the world/
Every time I cut a tree.
Perhaps a stairway for a
king/ A palette for an artist’s
brush, or a seat board for a
swing/ An altar for the village
church/ And poles that bring
in city lights and holds the
Stars & Stripes unfurled.
No, I have never been to
Bangladesh/ And there are
places I will never see/ But
with these two hands I touch
the world/ Every time I cut a
tree.
the politicians who represent
you because all that govern-
ment stuff doesn’t affect you,
unless they tell you it does at
your break meetings, the
same way most decide who to
vote for. (If you even bother
to vote).
You want to be a part of
it all, so you watch all the
shows and buy the latest and
greatest things that you see on
TV. They tell you of your
need for it, so you buy it, even
if you have to use credit.
Name brands on over-
priced clothing that you don’t
take the price tag off if you’re
“cool,” $50 hamburgers, $5
shakes, $3 a gallon gas prices,
SUVs and Hummers with
bumper stickers that read,
“Support Our Troops,” even
though driving a gas guzzler
helps pay for the bullets and
missiles that kill our troops.
Going shopping in the
supermarkets or giant mall
meant walking through a sea
of strangers, looking away
from the eyes of others to
avoid confrontation from ei-
ther a villain of the law, or
worst, a person trying to get
you to give them some
money in the name of a char-
ity you might have heard of,
or buying something because
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