Page 2
Illinois Valley News, Cave Junction, OR Wednesday, August 25, 2004
Every so often it feels as though we are sur-
rounded by cats and dogs; or at least by cat and dog
hair, or the quite visible signs of our hairy compan-
ions. I mean, there are only two of each living with us
in our casa, but sometimes it seems like a herd.
Of course, one cat galloping down a hallway, fol-
lowed by a dog in hot pursuit definitely constitutes a
herd. Noisewise, anyway.
Speaking of noise, anyone who has ever been
awakened at 3 a.m. by the entertaining sounds of
hacking, gagging and coughing (from a cat, not your
spouse) knows of what I speak. Yes, the dread ailment
known as hairballs rears its ugly head, so to speak.
And later that morning, perhaps only a short time
later, when heading for the bathroom, one may dis-
cover the location of said hairballs. With their bare
feet. Icky.
Other signs of feline habitation are the scratch
marks on various pieces of furniture and the inside of
the front door. We can’t seem to find a scratching post
that is better than our furniture. We’ve tried. Even
purchased a tall tower, designed for cat climbing and
scratching. Unfortunately, it was not well-made, and
we had to take it back after 16-pound “Bubba” nearly
took an unplanned dive because the tower wasn’t
strong enough to hold tight between the floor and ceil-
ing.
Because of the feline skill at opening the bottom
doors on our dresser, and the folding door to our pots-
and-pans cupboard, we had to install child-proof
latches. They work, except that our nocturnal guests
keep trying to open them, making banging noises.
Usually at 2 a.m.
Another cat factor involves the frightful item
known as a litter box. Although the one in our bath-
room for “Bubba” and his mom, “Maui,” has a high
bottom lip, they still scatter litter onto the floor in sub-
stantial quantities. Crunching underfoot, it always re-
minds me of going to the beach. Except for the aroma.
Moving rapidly from this area, we come to our
two dogs. They’re the two critters who bark. But they
do not hack up hairballs. No, they just barf now and
then. Sometimes we can tell the source; often not.
And it almost always happens at night after we’re
asleep. Sometimes on the bed. A most exciting life for
us, never knowing what’s going to happen next.
Again moving rapidly from this area we must
touch on dogs barking. All I can say about this is that
I used to think Pomeranian “Rocky” had a brain the
size of a walnut. But because of his barking without
reason, except that he thinks he should because maybe
there was a reason, I have changed his brain size to a
pea. What happens is that he hears himself barking
and thinks, “Hey, I hear barking; I better challenge
that and sound the alert.”
Have to stop now. I hear the sounds of an ap-
proaching herd.
(Editor’s Note: Views and
commentary expressed in let-
ters to the editor are strictly
those of the letter-writers.
* * *
Typed, double-spaced
letters are acceptable for con-
sideration. Handwritten letters
that are double-spaced and
highly legible also can be con-
sidered for publication.
Cards of thanks are not
accepted as letters.)
* * *
Pretty city
From Ruth E. Wick
Cave Junction
Our little town is really
looking good; don’t you
think?
Business buildings
(are) all painted or cleaned
(and) streets are clean.
Robbing schools
From Pamela Tennity
Selma
I remember a poster I
hung in my kitchen in
1970: “Wouldn’t it be
wonderful if we had all the
money needed for our
schools, and the Pentagon
had to hold a bake sale to
buy a new bomber?”
More than 30 years
later, we are still robbing
our schools and social pro-
grams to pay for a military
that is growing out of pro-
portion to the need. The
Vietnam War was a mis-
take -- so is the war in
Iraq.
Star Wars doesn’t
work, and we’re paying
billions for a system to
protect us from missiles
that no longer are a threat.
Bush and his administra-
tion have introduced pre-
emptive war against world
opinion. (Remember that
millions marched in the
streets all over the world
against the war in Iraq.)
Homeland Security
spends millions on four-
year-old threats, keeping
us fearful in our own
homes to satisfy their own
political agenda.
If we spent a tiny per-
centage of the military
budget on alternative en-
ergy, we wouldn’t have to
invade other countries to
feed our power hungry
people.
I will vote for John
Kerry because he under-
stands the environmental,
social and health-care is-
sues crucial to the future of
this country.
“Ahem, we are getting
rather low on bananas,”
one might say while gaz-
ing past columns and
domes -- into the littered
streets of the dirty, down-
trodden side of a good
idea. And one might won-
der how this dirty little
town got the name of
“Washing Town.” Go fig-
ure.
The wish-he-was-King
Kong in this two-faced,
plugged-nickel “Washing
Town” is also (and aint it
phoney but we’re not
laughing), George; imag-
ine that.
“Curious chap,” one
might say, while pondering
the political possibilities of
posturing chimps being
replaced by actual, intelli-
gent, more highly-evolved
humanoids.
First though, what is
needed are scoop shovels,
hip waders and some hon-
est hard work at removing
all the bovine scat from the
monkey house and some
progress in real time
shown by the scrubbing ‘til
it shines on both sides of
the tracks of “Washing
Town.”
“Nah. Too much
work,” said one ostrich to
another.
Well, as Curious
George and the man in the
yellow hat paddle their
canoe out of my mind, I
got a glimpse of the book
they were reading when
not paddling, titled “The
Rabid Dingo of Ostrich-
ville.” Below in smaller
print, “The Death of a De-
mocracy.” Imagine that.
Logging response
From William Reid
Cave Junction
In her letter on
“Logging ‘politics’” (in
last week’s issue of
“Illinois Valley News”),
Catherine Austin com-
ments on all the thoughtful
letters regarding the Bis-
cuit Fire sale. From the
tone of her letter it is ap-
parent that in her opinion,
only the letters opposing
salvage logging are
“thoughtful.”
If she had read what
was proposed in Environ-
mental Impact Statements
from the Forest Service
and the final Record of
Decision, she would know
that no logging was ever
proposed for the wilder-
ness area.
If she would read the
Records of Decisions --
regarding
Late-
Successional Reserve
(LSR) Salvage & Planting,
(Continued on page 3)
You are invited to attend a meeting
Friday, Sept. 3 - 6 p.m.
Josephine County Bldg., 102 S. Redwood Hwy.
The meeting is to introduce our product called FIRE BLOC
*FIRE BLOC is a product when mixed with water will prevent the
encroachment of fire: wild or domestic.
*FIRE BLOC is non-toxic and biodegradable, and when sprayed on any
surface lasts for 30 hours.
*FIRE BLOC is also very effective in suppressing any type of fire and can
be used to set up a fire barrier as wide as necessary to protect all vegetation and
structures in the path of the fire.
*Several local and regional fire prevention agency reps. will be attending.
*We will be setting up a manufacturing plant in Cave Junction and are
looking for financial assistance to accomplish this task.
Fire Bloc, Inc. (541) 592-7020
‘Monkey Business’
Illinois Valley News
An Independent Weekly Newspaper Co-owned and
published by Robert R. (Bob) and Jan Rodriguez
Bob Rodriguez, Editor El Jefe
Entered as second class matter June 11, 1937 at Post
Office as Official Newspaper for Josephine County and
Josephine County Three Rivers School District, published
at 321 S. Redwood Hwy., Cave Junction, OR 97523
Periodicals postage paid at Cave Junction, OR 97523
Post Office Box 1370 USPS 258-820
Telephone (541) 592-2541, FAX (541) 592-4330
Volume 66, No. 23
Staff: Cindy Newton, Chris Robertson,
Michelle Binker, Becky Loudon,
Shane Welsh & Kacy Clement
Member: Oregon Newspaper Publishers Association
DEADLINES:
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POSTMASTER: Please send address changes to
P.O. Box 1370, Cave Junction, OR. 97523
From William Schnieder
Cave Junction
Remember Curious
George the monkey and
the man with the yellow
hat? Ah yes, what a little
scamp that monkey was;
and the man in the hat was
pretty cool too.
Speaking of monkeys,
I can imagine a little town,
let’s say, back east some-
where. A dirty little town
with the worst of slums
and some of the cleanest,
well-scrubbed, white-
washed if you will, streets
and buildings in the world.
“Capital, old chap,” one
might say upon seeing the
array of columns, domes
and phallic symbols; some
bananas please.
In this town lives a
bunch of overdressed, chit-
tering-chattering chimpan-
zee, wanna-be-gorillas and
a bunch of spider monkeys
running around, messing
up everything that they get
near as spider monkeys
without diapers will do.
Funny thing though.
They create this mess and
blame it on the ostriches,
steal the bananas, rip up
the trees, chitter scream-
ingly and chattering
loudly; demanding that the
ostriches bring them more
bananas.
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