Fire safety includes working smoke detector and easy-to-read address
By Dave Lapof, Siletz Fire Chief
I wanted to take this opportunity to
introduce myself and re-introduce the
Siletz Fire District to you, the members
of our community.
I was recently hired by the fire district
to serve as fire chief. While I do respond
as a firefighter/EMT, my main focus is
administrative.
My experience in emergency services
spans more than 23 years, including vol
unteering with a very small island fire dis
trict in Washington state. Most recently,
I was with the Seal Rock Fire District as
fire chief and with the Keizer Fire District
since 1995, leaving that agency in the
capacity of lieutenant.
We are accomplishing great things
here at the Siletz Fire District. Five of
our 12 volunteers are attending a first
responder class at the Toledo Fire Depart
ment, a number of our folks attended
specialized pumper operator training last
month and the list of training classes goes
on and on.
The purpose of all this training is to
better prepare ourselves to respond to
your emergency, whether it is a fire or
medical in nature.
But the most efficient way to address
these emergencies is not to have them in
the first place. While many medical issues
sneak up on us, fires for the most part
are preventable.
During the cold weather, we noticed
an increase in responses to carbon mon
oxide alarms going off, which brought us
into your homes. These alarm activations
happen in part because homes are closed
up to keep the cold weather out and
wood stoves work overtime. During these
visits, we saw safety practices that con
cern us, including:
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•
•
Firewood stored too close to the heater
Flues and stove pipe that leak or are
not sealed up
Homes without working smoke
detectors
Please look around and see if any
of these items describe safety issues in
your home.
We can’t stress enough the lifesaving
benefit of having a working smoke detec
tor. It’s recommended that you have one
in a common hallway and one in each
bedroom.
We know this can be a financial bur
den and they can be difficult to install.
But even with these challenges, the results
of having a working smoke detector to
warn you and your family of a growing
danger is really the difference between
life and death in thousands of homes
across our nation.
Oregon was one of the first states to
recognize the benefit of a smoke detector
with a 10-year battery and a hush feature.
With both of these added features, batter
ies are less likely to be removed and will
last for years.
When we do have to respond, finding
your home quickly can mean the differ
ence between a happy outcome or one
that results in death. Having a front porch
light and a clearly identifiable address are
the best ways to assure we will arrive in
the quickest manner and begin to resolve
your crisis, whatever it may be.
We are actively applying for grants to
address a number of these concerns, but
until then please make your home as fire
safe as you can.
Because of my work schedule my
hours are varied, but you can always reach
me by one of the following ways: 541-
444-2043 (station), 541-272-1958 (cell)
or dlapof@siletzfire.com. I would be more
than happy to discuss these or any other
safety issues or concerns you might have.
I look forward to meeting more of
the community over the next few months.
Stay safe.
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Notes, con’t from previous
Parent: You’re feeling angry and
disappointed, and you’ve given up.
Reflective listening involves grasp
ing what the child feels and means, then
stating this meaning so the child feels
understood and accepted. Reflective
listening provides a sort of mirror for
the child to see himself or herself more
clearly. In other words, it gives the child
a kind of feedback.
Most people feel a little uncomfort
able trying reflective listening as a tool,
but it quickly becomes fairly easy.
Communication between persons
can be described in terms of “closed”
and “open” responses. A closed response
indicates the listener has neither heard nor
understood what was said. Closed responses
tend to cut off or end communication.
In contrast, an open response indicates
the listener has heard what the other person
has said. It reflects the speaker’s message
in a way that clearly indicates the listener
has heard the feelings behind the words.
Here are examples of closed and open
responses following a child’s remark:
Child: I m really disappointed with
Billy and the other kids for not coming
over to play with me. There’s nothing to do.
Closed response: Well, things
don’t always go the way we want them
to. That’s part of life.
Open response: It seems as if no
one cares and you are feeling left out.
The first response does not accept
the child’s feelings. It says that what he
or she feels does not matter. This is a
type of put-down that ends up blocking
communication and may leave the child
feeling rejected.
The second response recognizes what
the child is feeling. It shows acceptance
and concern. The child may decide to tell
you more.
Reflective listening means we pro
duce open responses that reflect the
child’s feelings and meanings. It requires
sensitivity to a wide variety of feelings
plus the ability to express them. It is non-
judgmental. Thus, it encourages the child
to feel heard and to keep talking.
Nonverbal communication
The communication process is always
a combination of verbal and nonverbal.
Our actions (eye contact and open body
language), facial expressions and voice
tones communicate whether or not we
are listening to the speaker. Ever try to
hold a conversation with someone who is
reading the newspaper at the same time?
We can communicate nonverbally
through a smile, a frown or a pat on the
back, all of which enhance or encourage
communication. Silently deciding not to
overprotect, nag or interfere communi
cates acceptance.
When we respond nonjudgmentally by
accepting our child’s feelings and mean
ings, both verbally and nonverbally, we
strengthen empathy and communication.
A parent cannot catch the meaning of a
sullen look, a broad smile or a tearful face
simply by listening. Behavior expresses
meaning, sometimes more clearly than
words. A parent must learn to catch the
meanings of a child’s behavior by “tuning
in” to more than his or her words.
Examples of responding to nonverbal
behaviors could be:
“Your frown seems to say that you
disagree.”
“When your face lights up that way,
you look very happy.”
“Looks as if you are really upset.
Want to talk about it?”
Remember! Statements that acknowl
edge nonverbal cues invite the child to
express his or her feelings.
Since reflective listening will be as
new to the child as it is to you, expect a
startled reaction to your first attempts. The
child may look surprised and acknowl
edge your statement with an eye roll or a
“yeah” and then walk away.
At this point, you could attempt to keep
communication open with, “Would you
like to tell me more about it?” Or, depend
ing upon the situation, you could make no
response and wait for another opportunity.
It’s important that you don’t try to
force the child to share his or her feelings.
This new experience may be embarrass
ing to the child and your well-intentioned
responses may be seen as an attempt to
invade the child’s privacy. A power con
test could result if you attempt to push
the matter.
There will be many opportunities to
try again if you make attempts to respond
to the child’s invitations. The child is
free to accept or reject your offer of help.
Don’t be discouraged if the child does not
respond quickly; remember this is a new
experience that may be uncomfortable
for the child.
Don’t be concerned about doing
reflective listening “just right.” You don’t
have to do it perfectly. If you are sincere in
an attempt to understand but mis-identify
the feeling, your child will let you know
and you can try again.
Some words of caution
Keep your feedback statements tenta
tive. You can’t be sure you know exactly
what the child is feeling. Watch your tone of
voice and avoid sounding like a mind reader.
Reflective listening can be overdone.
Constantly bombarding your child with
reflective listening can cause them to
avoid communication with you. Don’t
respond to every frown or comment. Use
discretion. With sensitivity, you can rec
ognize when your child wants to talk and
when he or she does not.
Once you have gained skill in using
reflective listening, you will be ready for
the next step - exploring alternatives,
which will be the subject of next month’s
article. Usually, children can solve their
own problems simply through being heard
by a sympathetic adult. They can, how
ever, gain wider experience in problem
solving when an adult helps them consider
the advantages and disadvantages of vari
ous courses of action.
Remember - practice plus patience
equals progress. Have fun with the journey.
April 2011
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Siletz News
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15