6 Summer 2011 Applegater
APPLEGATE OUTBACK: MY OPINION
Six basic rules
for rearing
children
By BoB FisCheR
Once upon
a time people got
married, had children
and reared them. It
wasn’t something our
forebearers spent a
lot of time fussing
and fretting over, it
was just something
they did, along with
most everyone else. When a young
couple had children, grandparents
and other extended family provided
w h a t e ve r s u p p o r t t h e y n e e d e d
to get their feet on the ground.
“Parenting” hadn’t been invented yet.
Along came a war and then
a baby boom. Young parents took
their children and went looking for
the promised land. From the ashes
of the extended family rose a host of
child-rearing experts. It wasn’t long
before rhetoric replaced reality as the
primary shaper of our child-rearing
practices. Nonsense replaced common
sense. American families became
child-centered, American parents
became permissive and democratic,
therefore, American children became
spoiled and sassy and out of control.
It is high time we returned to a
more traditional and common-sense
vision of child-rearing. Specifically,
we need to start rearing children
consistent with what I call, “the rules
of the game.” These are the realities
by which they are going to have to
live their adult lives, and the sooner
they get used to them, the better.
RULE 1. You are never going
to be the center of everyone’s attention.
Not for long, at least. This simply means
that children should not be the center of
attention in their families. Parents should
be the center of attention. If they are not,
children won’t pay attention to them.
RULE 2. Ever yone must
obey a higher authority. Therefore,
parents should expect children to
obey. They should not wish that
children would obey, they should
not plead with children to obey, they
should not rant and rave at children
to obey. They simply should, without
apology, expect them to toe the mark.
RULE 3. Everyone is expected
to be a contributing member of society.
Too many children are on the dole.
They take from their families, but are
rarely, if ever, expected to put anything
of consequence back into them. Ask
yourself this question: “Do I expect
my children to perform a regular
routine of chores in and around the
home, for which they are not paid?”
The only acceptable answer is “Yes.”
RULE 4. Everyone is responsible
for his or her own behavior. Quite
simply, a child who does something
bad ought to feel bad about it. All too
often, however, the child does something
wrong and the parents feel bad. Why
should a child accept responsibility for
his own behavior if someone else is
doing a fine job of accepting it for him.
RULE 5. You can’t always
get what you want, and what you do
get you get by working and waiting.
Therefore, children should receive
all of these things they need, and a
conservative amount of these things
they want. Today’s child desperately
needs more “Vitamin N,” the most
character-building two-letter word in
the English language.
RULE 6. You experience
happiness, which is the elixir of success,
in direct proportion to how sensitive
and considerate you are of others. So,
self-centeredness and happiness do not
go hand in hand. Parents who raise their
children according to rules one through
five do not have to worry about rule six.
Bob Fischer • 541-846-6218
Author’s Note: I wrote this story
back in the 1970s when a lot of children
were spinning out of control. Of course,
today you still see this happening. I am
not talking about everyone’s child, only the
ones who need help. Most of the children I
come in contact with are really great kids.
Technical and Financial Assistance
Available for Landowners
The Natural Resources Conservation
Service (NRCS) in Jackson County has technical
and financial assistance available for landowners
on private non-industrial forestlands. They
are now accepting applications for the 2012
Environmental Quality Incentives Program
(EQIP) for forest health and fuels reduction
projects in the Applegate and Seven Basins
Community Wildfire Protection Plan (CWPP)
areas. Cost-share is available for 50% to 90% of eligible practices including thinning,
pruning, and slash treatments. Program incentives are also available for development
of a Forest Management Plan.
Priority will be given to applications within the Humbug Creek and
Thompson Creek drainages in the Applegate Watershed, although landowners from
other parts of the Applegate are encouraged to apply. If you have questions regarding
the program or the location of your property, or would like to apply, please contact:
Erin Kurtz • 541-776-4276 ext. 108
District Conservationist, Medford
erin.kurtz@or.usda.gov
Peter Winnick • 541-776-4276 ext. 109
Soil Conservationist, Medford
peter.winnick@ca.usda.gov
Ap p l e g a t e r e h e a r s a l s
begin September 7
After finishing up two very exciting
sessions with our Director, Blake Weller,
this past winter and spring, Voices of the
Applegate will begin rehearsing again on
Wednesday evening, September 7, at the
Applegate Library at 7:00 pm. Rehearsals
will continue every Wednesday evening
until November 16, and our concert will
be held on November 20 at 3 pm at the
Applegate River Ranch House.
Our past session was made up of
“American Music” such as: music from the
musical, “Rent,” songs by Aaron Copland,
Stephen Foster, Dave Brubeck and even
some traditional spirituals.
Our choir consists of about 20
community members with little musical
training, but with a lot of musical
enthusiasm, enough to be able to pull off
various musical arrangements in four-part
harmony. No audition is required.
For more information, call Joan Peterson at 541-846-6988.
Hospitality: Making your guests feel like they’re at home, even if you wish they were.
