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THE C L A C K A M A S P R IN T
J FEB. 11. 2 0 1 5
I V O L . 48 ISSUE 12
How to be single
on VaAzbfhw L
by Jack Spencer and Megan McCoy
There are just a few short days left before the day
dedicated to love, yet, it causes a lot of stress and
sadness for people lacking a significant other. Being
single on Valentine’s Day can be a bummer; however,
before you bathe in self-pity, consider the following
reasons why being single actually kind of rocks.
For the girls:
1. You can order whatever you want for dinner.
There’s none of the, “W hat do you want to eat?”
“I don’t know...” when you do, in fact, know ex
actly what you want but don’t say it. therefore
they get to pick Nope, that won’t happen this
year. You buy whatever you want and you eat all
of it, no daintiness required here.
2. Meagan Baumann, a Clackamas Comm uni
ty College student, suggested buying yourself
flowers and chocolate. Why not? It’s much
cheaper the day of and the day after the holiday.
3. Remember that TV show or movie that your ex
hated but you adored? Watch the crap out of it.
Go ahead, tear up during the sad parts, who’s
going to judge you? Not your boyfriend.
4. Don’t underestimate how fun it is to make fun
of couples with other single friends. Hmm, let’s
see how many people post on Facebook that
they have “the best boyfriend ever” this year.
5. Instead of your money going towards a gift for
your significant other, use that money to treat
yourself. Now nothing can stop you from buy
ing those shoes you’ve had your eyes on.
6. There’s no one to dress up for. If wearing pa
jamas all day is what you desire, then wearing
pajamas all day is what you will do. No one can
tell you otherwise.
7. W hen Beyonce tells all the single ladies to put
their hands up, it’s actually okay to do so.
For the guys:
1. It’s the NBA All-Star weekend. Not only that,
but Saturday just so happens to be the day of
the three-point shootout and the slam dunk
contest, everyone’s favorite events of the whole
weekend. So kick back with some buddies and
watch some sports.
2. Remember last Valentine’s Day, when you and
your lady just couldn’t decide on what to do to
celebrate? Indecisiveness is one trait you won’t
have to deal with this year. You get to ask your
self what you want to do, and this time there’s
only one answer that matters.
3. Rewind to one year ago, pull out your wal
let and take a look inside. The only thing you
might find is a bat living in that empty space
where the money should be. Come back to the
present, then do the same thing. That bats cave
is most likely populated by a lush field of green,
and it’s all for you.
4. Clackamas Community College student Kyle
Taylor’s plans completely depend on the weath
er. If it’s nice enough outside he plans to go rid
ing for the day. The day will conclude with a
pleasant dinner with friends.
5. There’s always that chance that you want to
reminisce on the past or maybe you just want to
listen to some smooth slow jams. Dust off those
Drake and Frank Ocean albums and just let the
good times roll.
6. If Valentine’s Day is really getting to you and
you just feel like sitting around is not going to
make the day go any quicker, pick up a shift at
w ork It’s Saturday, all the couples will be out
and about, might as well make some money off
of them.