4
The Clackamas Print
Wednesday, Novenber 1,1995
~Feature
Thoughts on aging and Oscar Mayer
to the park? Are you
kidding? I have my
nails to do and besides,
I’m busy developing a
bad case of ulcerative
colitis...”
Some jerks even
make fun of those who
are older than they, as if
being long lived isn’t a
goal we all hope to at
tain.
Growing older is a
Growing older isn’t such a curious thing. How we
disagreeable deal. It certainly react to growing older is
beats the alternative.
even more interesting.
I will never forget the sight; Remember when you
of my eighty year-old grand were eight and just
mother walking up to me, sternly about
everything
waggling her finger in my face for seemed like a game or a
a moment before exploding into secret spy mission?
a stirring rendition of, “Oh-h-h... What’s wrong with do
I wish I were an Oscar Mayer ing that now that we are
Wiener...”
adults? Why not pre
Grandma knew the secret. tend that the loathsome
Grandma never grew old.
test in chemistry is just
I would like to think that a fun game of Aggrava
some of her sparkle and joy of liv tion? Why not make
ing extended down my way. Af that hurried commute
ter all, Grandma knew well the from school to work and
misery that life could dish out, but home again an exciting
she never chose to dwell on it. spy and snoop mission
Instead, she focused on her stead like you used to?
fast faith and that “joy in the game
Where do we put that child
of life.”
like love of wonder, anyway? Did
Grandma left a legacy that we send it off in a manila enve
laughter, especially laughter di lope to the IRS, or did it disap
rected at ourselves, is the besf pear with that overdue bill from
fountain of youth around. Be the electric company? Have we
sides, people who take life too let the headaches, the broken-
seriously are not much fun to be down car and responsibilities of
around. Studies show that we growing older turn us into the
don’t usually have to be around kind of adults we loathed and
them too long anyway, because avoided as children?
they “serious” themselves to
As I write this column, I fight
death.
off the notion that I am growing
You’ve seen them. “Noway, older, that I am past my prime,
can’t go to the show with you and that I am neither what I used to
the kids, I’ve got a report and a be nor a spring chicken anymore.
heart attack to work on.” Or “Go By the time this article hits print
Linda Barr Batdorf
Staff Writer
“ Whether seventy or sixteen,
there is in every being’s heart a
love of wonder; the sweet amaze
ment at the stars and starlike
things and thoughts; the un
daunted challenge of events, the
unfailing childlike appetite for
what comes next, and the joy in
the game of life. ”
Samuel Ullman, 1984
I will have turned forty years old.
Now I am perfectly aware
that no one really gives a rip how
old anyone else is — generally
speaking. My age or your age or
the age of the checker down at
Safeway is of no real import in
the grand scheme of things.
But it is often the case that
whenever one of us is looking at
a birthday that changes the first
digit of our chronological age, for
some reason, we can find that nu
meric adjustment disturbing.
My six year-old son, Andy
must have overheard me commis
erating about my pending digit
change and remarked excitedly,
“Don’t worry Mom, you look like
you’re in your thirties!”
Whew.
I have decided to make this
birthday the best one yet, because
in many ways, it simply signifies
a new beginning.
This year, when the candles
are blown out and jokes about
dentures and Depends subside,
maybe we will just start singing
that old Oscar Mayer tune.
Jack Benny said it best, “Age
is strictly a case of mind over
matter. If you don’t mind, it
doesn’t matter.”
Steven Katz reads fiction at Clackamas
Writer of 16 novels including Wier &
Pouce, Florry of Washington Heights
and his newest, Swanny’s Ways, visits
Vicki Welch
Copy Editor
Steven Katz, author of
“Wier & Pouce” and “Florry of
Washington Heights”, visited
Clackamas last Friday,from
noon to 1 p.m., to read part of
his new book “Swanny’s Ways”,
which is the last book in his
current trilogy.
“More credibility should be
given to the experiments of
three-year-olds. I tried a
chicken in a rain barrel and
learned it couldn’t swim. It died
instead, and that gave me my
first taste of megalomaniacal
ecstasy, which was one of my
first reasons for becoming a
novelist. Characters are quite
like chickens; you can kill them
for your sport fry them if they
refuse to come home to roost.”
When talking about his
new novel, Katz remarked
“What I’m trying to do is write
a narrative.” He then read a part
of “Swanny’s Ways”, “Wine”,
which is set in New York City.
This is the story of a man, Wil
liam “Swanny” Swanson, who is
trying to rectify the past, some
thing Katz thinks is incredibly in
teresting.
Katz has considered himself
an author since high school. He
has written 16 books between
1962 and 1995. He has been pub
lished by several publishing com
panies including Sun and Moon
Press, Bamberger Books and Ran
dom House.
“In my experience it doesn’t
get any easier to write; if any
thing, it gets harder.... Getting
my new novel right is the most
difficult thing I have ever done. I
tend to ask more questions of my
work, and want more from it. I
suppose there is an advantage in
this, that if ever I felt I’d written
a perfect work, I might stop and
what keeps the writer alive, what
keeps the culture alive, is the con
tinual reframing and telling of the
stories. Perhaps everything I do
as a writer is by way of figuring
out in what language to atone for
once drowning the Hardens’
chicken.”
Authors at
CCC get
published
Dan Anderson
Staff Writer
Clackamas now boasts
five faculty members who have
contributed to the body of mod
ern literature in prose, poetry
and drama.
Craig Lesley, currently on
sabbatical supporting his latest
offering “The Sky Fisherman,”
has published three novels.
Lesley’s works focus on small
town rural life, the Native
American experience and real-
life images. He has also com
piled and edited two compila
tions of other authors’ work,
most notably “Talking
Leaves,” a collection of Native
American legends given him
directly from people living on
Oregon reservations.
The sign outside writing
instructor Diane Averill’s of
fice reads: “Do you have
enough poetry m your life?” If
anyone has enough, Averill
does; she has published one
complete collection of poems
entitled “Branches Doubled
Over with Fruit,” and a smaller
chapbook called “Turtle Sky.”
Averill offers this advice to stu
dent writers: “It’s good for
beginning writers to familiar
ize themselves with all kinds
of writing, not just one type.
It’s important to read, read,
read and write, write, write.”
Actress, playwright and
part-time instructor Susan
Mach has produced two full-
length plays. The first, titled
“Monograms,” a kind of biog
raphy of 1920’s personality
Hazel Hall, was nominated for
a Grammy for best off-
broadway play. In April, an off-
Broadway theatre will produce
“Monograms” for a New York
audience. Her second play will
show in Boston, in November,
Jim Grabbil has become a
finalist for the Oregon Book
Award this year for his work
of nonfiction, “Through the
Green Fire.” Grabbil also has
a collection of poems pub
lished.
Tim Schell, a native of the
Northwest, has written many
short stories. They have been
published in several publica
tions, including “Discovery,”
“Tokyo Journal,” “Signature”
and “Sports Illustrated.” He
was also the Fiction Editor of
“Hayden’s Fairy Revue.”
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