Name dropper
regard
is always something going on at Clackamas
iity College and the Cougar Print has always
be on top of things. That's the American way
alism; 100 per cent effort 100 per cent of the
te of our gargantuan effort to give the students
information possible, there is one person on
who does the work of ten and never complains
is outrageous work load. That person is me.
that feels good. I get so tired of saying we and
these editorials instead of I, me or mine,
ne am responsible for all that goes on here. I
put up with a bunch of idiots and ingrates who
low one end of a typewriter from another. Yet
heir faults (faults I could list for hours) I have
lest regard for them that I can give to lesser life
To the Editor:
I'm not Lisa. My name's Charlie and if I'm a legend in my own
mind why is my picture always on the front page of your newspaper
good buddy?
Reverend Charlie (C.B.) Bennett Moon
ASG Deity and Zombie Woof First Class
Baa,baa
To the Editor:
We are four little sheep that have lost their way. Baa, baa, baa.
Can we pull the wool over your eyes sometime?
Ramona, Judy, Trixie and Waldo
Drug embargo
To the Editor:
ny rate, the purpose of this editorial is to let
¡concerned young people of today know that I
ply concerned about your right to all the infor-
Isee fit to give to you.
t don't care enough about personal glory to in-
¡rbage like the fact that Dr. Hakanson has taken
/ bribes that his wallet has turned green. Nor do
ry point in following up the real drug problem
; the one in the campus security department,
i of course there was the time that the faculty
eir big post-finals orgy in the intimate dining
in the cafeteria.
t's not news. The really important news is board
cation and student government meetings. That's
the interesting stuff is to be found. Not only
ut stories about these events are much easier to
¡nd, as I've told you before, my staff couldn't
tsway out of a paper sack.
nkyou for your indulgence with this once eccen-
in my otherwise flawless character.
Greetings and Hallucinations. It is our unfortunate duty to in
form you that your drugs will be cut off for the remainder of the
term.
The Burnt Wood Four
Nos. 75303 thru 6
Stiff competition
To the Editor:
Because the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences failed
to announce all of the awards not given at its annual awards cere
mony I feel it is my duty to do so for them.
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A FILM ABOUT PERVERTS:
WORST SUPPORTING ACTRESS IN A FILM RATED G:
BEST MUSICAL SCORE FOR A SILENT MOVIE:
BEST PERFORMANCE BY A CORPSE IN A LEADING ROLE:
EXCELLENCE IN COSTUMING FOR AN X-RATED FILM:
Thank you for your indulgence.
Êi
recent allegations that the Clackamas Community Col-
pfflpus Security staff has been dealing in drugs seems to
by the picture on the left as Security Chief
Johnson scores a high grade envelope from Manila. On
f
Clackamas at Beavercreek
Peter Finch
the right, one security staffer works as an undercover narcotics
agent. Undercover surveillance is security's main method of
acquiring drugs.