WHAT DYSPEPTICS MAY EAT TRAVELER KICKS ON
COOK
others were reasung, the roast fowl,
the salad, the sandwiches, the cold MONKEY THAT TALKS
MILADY OF THE sparkling drinks.
Shun Products of Frying Pan—Eat Declares Continental Cooking Is No
Toast In Proferenoe to
When she had finished, she stood
Longer Unchallenged as to
up and said: “Good-by."
Bread.
Its Excellence.
FORTUNES
PROFESSOR GARNER BRINGS US
He followed her for a little distance
A WONDERFUL APE.
Toast should be eaten In preference
and
demanded:
Continental cooking Is no longer un­
to bread, but brown bread Is often challenged as to its excellence. It Is
“
When
will
you
tell
me
the
rest
of
By PHILIP KEAN
beneficial. White fish, eggs, nourish­ charged with being unequal—partial
my fortune?”
ing soups, and milk pudding should be to meats and fishes and very unfair In
A little troubled look fluttered Animal From Africa Jungle to Denv,
(Copyright, 1910, by Associated Literary Press.)
largely used; spinach, French beans, Its treatment of vegetables and fruits.
across her face. “Somewhere, some­ onstrate Theory of Chimpanzee
boiled celery, butter, cream, olive oil,, A "traveler," who evidently deems
Intelligence, So the Profee-
The dust was thick on ‘the long time,” she said and fled.
most fruits, except the very acid ones, It prudent to remain anonymous, writ­ white road; sun and glare and heat
He went back to find the blond
sor Says.
provided they are stewed but not ing for the Lady's Realm, complains held the noonday world in bondage. Sylvia In a bad temper. She com­
sweetened too much, will be found that in continental hotels it is almost Even the birds were languid as they plained of everything, blaming the
New York.—After living for seven
to agree with the dyspeptic. There impossible to get a good dish of sat with drooped wings on the fence girl by the roadside for their stop in years in a bamboo hut in the heart of
are cases, however, in fhlch certain mashed potatoes, that plain stewed to­ rails. On the grass by the roadside a this lonely place. “Let’s- leave it as the African' jungle with only two
ordinarily digestible articles of food matoes and green peas are unknown, woman lay asleep, half hidden by the soon as possible,” she argued.
negro servants and wild chimpanzees
do not suit the patient, who must although many sauces are flavored bushes. Now and then a cart with a
It was a long drive before they
gorillas for companions, Professor
make up his mind to leave them alone. with the former, and the latter are slow Horse and drowsy driver rattled reached the country house that was and
L. Garner, the anthropologist,
Potatoes are sometimes productive oi used continually as mere "culinary by. Nothing disturbed the woman, their destination. They were just In Richard
has reached New York with “Susie,”
indigestion, but not always; they are
however, until there came from the time to dress for dinned and Oswald the 7-months-old ape, who can talk
best baked. Where there is a dyspep­ decorations.”
distance the “honk, honk” of an auto­ came down to find waiting for him and understand the English language.
Carrots
are
omnipresent,
and
so
is
tic the frying pan should not be used,
mobile horn. At the unusual sound a tall, slender girl whose mass of red-
twenty years Professor Garner
cauliflower,
which
the
waiter
admits
NOT A TRAGEDY AFTER ALL as fried foods are the most difficult is “the one vegetable they managed to in this far country she sat up. When gold hair lay against the Ivory of her has For made
a study of the animals that
of digestion. The following is a sim­
the
big
car
reached
the
blackberry
neck. Her filmy chiffon gown trailed Darwin declared were our ancestors,
cook well.”
ple
diet
table
for
any
one
who
suffers
bushes
in
the
fence
corner,
she
was
Woman's Piercing Screams and Heart­
behind her in snowy folds. The band
from dyspepsia due to gastric incom­ If one is a vegetarian—and this at the roadside, her hand held up. At of pearls that held her shining locks and in 1903 he sailed on his fourth
broken Sobs Come From School
trip to Cape Lopez, Western Africa;
writer lays himself open to the suspi­ her signal the car stopped.
petency:
of Dramatic Art.
was matched by other pearls that fell his purpose being, as he said, to watch
Breakfast—An egg, toast and but­ cion—one is in difficult straits indeed.
"What
do
you
want?
”
asked
the
in
ropes
almost
to
her
knees.
and learn the habits of the chimpan­
As one cannot live on carrots and cau­
A woman’s piercing scream smote ter, tea or a cup of beef tea.
man who sat beside the chauffeur.
He gazed In astonishment. "You?" zee in its wild state and to observe its
Dinner—Soup, boiled fish with some liflower one has recourse to bread and
the air. Thump, thump, thump! Heart­
“
Let
me
tell
your
fortune.
”
Her
he asked sharply.
capabilities without suggestion or
fruit But alas! the bread is so hard
breaking sobs broke upon the ears simple sauce, roast beef or lamb, or it breaks the teeth, and the fruit great eyes pleaded, supplementing the
Her face showed no sign of recog­ training and most important of all, to
chlckefl,
baked
potatoes
and
any
veg
­
of the horrified listeners. -
nition.
"I don’t understand.” she discover if the ape is able to distin­
makes one long for home orchards. softness of her voice.
With one accord they-rushed up the etable except cabbage. Toast or stale "The native apples are dry and taste­
From the back seat came a pro­ said.
guish different colors and forms.
bre&d.
Salad.
Fresh
fruit
or
milk
staircase and burst open the door of
test? “Why should he :stop here In
He boozed» consenting thus to her He has returned with proof that the
less. The pears, are hard and Inferior, the
the roam from which the sounds pro­ pudding.
heat,
Oswald?"
deception,
chimpanzee cannot only distinguish
Tea—Very little meat, bread, a and the ordinary grapes are not to
ceeded.
.
•
The man was studying the girl’s
Sylvia and her mother stared and the difference between red, white, and
compared with our own.”
A lady, with dishevelled hair, torn green vegetable, but no potato; be The
face.
"It
will
take
only
a
moment,
gasped as they, too, recognized the blue, but that it can tell the differ­
last hope of all diners Is coffee, he said.
and, dust-covered clothing, and eyes stewed fruit or custard.
personality of their fellow-guest But ence between half a dozen shades of
and
our
“
traveler,"
with
vegetarian
red with weeping, stood In the middle
Again the feminine voice protested. only once during the dinner did the red, the difference between a sphere,
tastes,
reaches
for
it
with
a
renewed
of the room. A man, with coat off,
"Give her some money and we will go lady of the red-gold locks lose the a cube and a cylinder and that It has
sleeves rolled up, his eyeballs rolling NOTHING LIKE THAT NOW glimmer of hope. But "It is seldom on.”
air of fine unconsciousness that en- a language of Its own, consisting of a
excellent;
It
is
never
served
with
The girl by the roadside cast a veloped her. It was when they spoke vocabulary of about twenty words.
in frenzy, confronted the intruders.
“What do you want here?” he de­ ”rofeesor Points Out That Ignorance cream," and the last hope dies when
of lunch. "You were not here,” her
Susie spent most of her voyage in
he is forced to admit that it must be
and Illiteracy of Past Is All
manded.
hostess said, and the transformed a cage In the butcher’s room, but part
at
least
two-thirds
chickory.
Vanished.
“We are here in the Interests of hu­
fortune teller had the -grace to blush of the time she was on deck. She has
Poor traveler! may his journey be
manity,” sternly answered one of
and murmur that she had eaten It a little chair that she carries about,
short,
and
may
he
return
to
his
truck
The
late
Prof.
William
P.
Blake,
them. “You are brutally maltreating
elsewhere.
and when told to “come here,” "sit
farm
before
his
peas
and
beans
and
whose encouraging mineralogical re­
this lady.”
Later, Oswald made her confess.
down" or "laugh" she obeys with sol­
ports Induced thé United States to buy corn and tomatoes are all gone, so
“Am I?” he said, turning to her.
Why do you try to convince me dierly alarcrity. When a match Is
“No—o,” she said, "you are not Alaska, believed firmly In his coun­ that he may revel in vegetable hash
that I do not know you?” he asked her lighted she cries out In a squeaky
and "boiled dinners” the rest of the
Gentlemen, he is teaching me how to try’s future.
when he had her safe on the moon­ voice, "Feu,” the French word for fire.
Professor Blake, In a Fourth of July season.
express the natural emotions. This is
lighted porch. “My heart would know “During my four expeditions I have
address
that
Tucson
still
remembers,
a school of dramatic art”
you anywhere.” Then tremulously. had a total of twenty-two chimpanzees
Then the avengers slunk out of the pointed out the forward strides that
“Perhaps you think I deserve them."
and nine gorillas In my house,” said
HOW TO STUDY CHARACTER
Arizona had made.
door.
"It was all tujh a wild freak,” she Professor Garner. "They were all
“Think of the ignorance and Illit­
admitted later. “How was I to know young ones, which I bought from na­
eracy of the past, all vanished now,” Interesting Use ' of Mental Powers
that you were coming here? Last tives to experiment with. I let them
The Retort.
he said. “Once, while out on a miner­
Close Observation of Faces
night we were talking of poverty, of have their freedom, but they always
Mrs. Bizey—I notice you’re cleaning alogical trip, I wandered into a court­
One Sees.
what one might do to obtain a meal came back at night to sleep. The go-
house, Mrs. Newcome, and I was house In an Arizona-village.
If one had not a cent In the world. rlllas were not so tractable and occa-
afraid you might throw your rubbish
“The case afoot concerned 'a letter.
Study the faces you see and try
It came to roe then that I had never .slonally I had to confine and guard
out on the back lot. We don’t do The prosecution wanted this letter ad­ form some Idea of the characters
earned anything In my life and I had them. In my opinion the chimpanzee
that sort of thing here----- .
mitted in evldence, but the defence their owners. Notice ears,, noses,
a fancy to see if I could do it. I had is the highest type of the lower ani­
Mrs. Newcome—I burned all our rub­ wanted it barred out. Finally the mouths, eyes, chins. Observe how few
often told fortunes to my friends, so mals and has the most brain power."
bish in the furnace this, morning, Mrs. judge said reluctantly:
beautiful mouths and ears you will
I put on a faded old gown and went Professor Garner declared that from
Bizey, including a book on “Etiquette”
“ ‘Hand the pesky thing up here And compared wit> other features.’ It
down that quiet road and waited for his studies of the chimpanzee he Is
which I might have saved for you.— and I’ll decide on it.’
Is an interesting use of your mental
some one to come. Then I fell asleep convinced that It has a bad memory
Catholic, Standard and Times.
“So the letter was handed up to the powers, this study of faces, and will
and it was your auto that waked me. ft 1 and does not remember a grievance
judge, and he put on his. spectacles teach you sympathy, if nothing more.
for very long and that It has not the
“It was fate,” he Interpolated.
and looked at it sideways and cross­ It you find yourself without faces to
Collecting Arrears.
“After I got Into it I was humiliated, resentment of the human being. Nei­
wise, and a loud laugh went up from study, (hen memorize verses, phrases
Cascaretta,” he said, "Is it all over the spectators.
yet I went on to the end because I ther has the native of Congo, he add­
or numbers, to retain your memory.
ween us?”
wanted to know what a girl would ed, the resentment of the white man.
" ‘What are they laughing at?’ I Learn to recall the numbers of a doz­
Yes, Geoffrey; it Is all over. asked the man next to me.
"In my opinion, it will not be very
have to do who really had to earn
en
or
a
score
of
your
acquaintances
’
ilenceforth we are merely friends.”
wbat she ate. I thought that I should long before champanzees will be able
“ Why, at the jedge’s bluff, o* homes, Instead of always referring to
, “Then, if you don’t mind, I’ll take course,’ was the reply. ‘The old fool
never see you again—and then to find to speak a language that we under­
an address book.
back that diamond ring.”
stand,” Professor Garner continued.
you
here!”
can’t read readin’-writ-in’, let alone
She
Sat
Up.
Commit the words of songs to mem­
The lovely maiden frowned.
"They will not only be able to repeat
“
It
was
fate,"
he
repeated.
“
But
you
writin’-wrltln’.’ ”
ory—even if you do not sing—-It will glance at1 the girl in the auto,
“No, Geoffrey,” she said; “you didn’t
words, but they will know the mean­
did
not
tell
me
the
end
of
my
for
­
make you popular with people who do not take money for nothing,
give me this ring until we had been
ing of what they say and hear." '
tune.”
-—or memorize a dozen lines of prose said. "Let me tell your fortune."
Nothing Can Replace Lpve.
engaged six months. I’ll wear It six
“How could I?” she said. "Your
from
the
dally
paper
if
you
have
noth
­
An older feminine voice urged the hand said that you must not marry
months longer, If you please.”
Who cares for germs that lurk In
at hand, just for practise.
necessity of going on. "Indeed, Os­ a blond woman, and there was a STRAW KILLS TONS OF FISH
kisses when the trees cast shadows ing It else
Is better than allowing your brain
»
________
<
over benches, and the moon, sympa­ forces to become weak and slipshod wald, you are Inconsiderate to stop blond young lady eating lunch with
Much the Same.
here In the heat"
thetic
creature,
hides
her
beams
among
you.
I
could
not
tell
such
1
a
rude
Indiana Health Expert Believes He
"But,” protested tue Englishman,
from lack of direction.
The young man, still held by the
Has Solved Puzzle Where Fac­
you have na family trees in your friendly clouds?
Make the most of the odd ends of eyes of the girl in the roadside, pro- fortune.”
“Oh, Sylvia is
Man*
may
Invent
a
flying
machine
He
looked
blank,
tory Refuse Is Dumpted.
country.”
time, and you will make the most of posed a compromise. "Let’s get out just a friend—but I hope to marry a
which
will
send
the
now
popular
and
“True,” rejoined the plain Amer­
yourself with little cost. and no loss. and eat our lunch back there in the blond woman.”
ican, “but we have a lot nf measly ubiquitous automobile to the junk
Muncie, Ind.— A. complete investiga­
■woods,
It looks cool under the
His tone was so significant that tion of the slaughter of fish in the
underbrush, whfch is quite as much heap. Statesmen may be able to ar­
trees.”
he
amended,
“
That
she
blushed,
is,
”
range
a
tariff
which-
will
reduce
the
The
Gaelic
ABC.
,
in the way and just as detrimental ti­
The fortune teller made an eager “if red'-gold hair can be called Misslsslnnewa river, when tons of. fish
cost of living to a normal scale. Phy­ Every letter in the Gaelic alphabet
were found dead in the stream, is be­
the scenery.”
sicians and surgeons may eliminate Is represented by a tree. The alpha­ confirmation. “It is cool,” she said, blond."
ing conducted in Delaware and Grant
“
and
there
is
a
spring
among
the
proudly,
"I
went
u]
Her
head
certain diseases and substitute good bet of today consists of eighteen let­
*
by State Fish Commissioner
think,” she reproved, 'that you are counties
THE WAY NOWADAYS.
feelings for the Monday morning ters,—in ancient Gaelic seventeen,— rocks.”
Miles.
A
murmur
of
distaste
from
the
presuming."
grouch. Inventors may utilize elec­ and now, as of old, all the letters with
The secretary of the state board of
tricity in such practical fashion that the exception of g, t and u, which girl In the tonneau was followed by •He leaned toward her. “I have said health, Dr. J. N. Hurty, has advanced
all other motive forces will be dis- stand for ivy, furze and heather, are the older woman’s decision. "We are it is fate, We cannot escape It. Do a new reason for the death of fish in
all hungry, why not?"
you wish to escape It, dear lady of for­
carded and forgotten. Tablets of rich, called after trees.
streams that are used by strawboard
The young ,man, questioning the tunes?” -•
nutritive qualities, and rare flavor may
companies. He says that in his opin­
The Gaelic a b c of today runs: girl by the roadside, appointed her
She
shook
her
head.
"I
am
not
sure,
eventually solve the servant girf prob­ allm, belte, coll, dur, eagh, fearn, gath,»
ion there is no poison in the refuse
into
their
guide.-
"Show
us
the
way
:
and
anyhow,
it
was
a
fake
fortune
—
lem. But what can ^ake the place of huath, logh, luis, muln, nuln, olv,
emptied
into the water from straws
the
the
wood
and
help
us
to
find
such things don’t come true.”
loVe, real, all-wool-and-a-yard-wlde pel th, ruls, sull, telne, ur, which is
<
“You can't get out of it that way,” board and paper mills that is destruc­
love, the sort our grandmothers used equivalent to saying: elm, birch, spring."
She went ahead of them - lightly, a he said. "You promised that I should tive to animal life, as has always
to make?
hazel, oak, aspen, alder, Ivy, white­ picturesque figure—tall and slender, marry. There Is only one woman that been supposed, but that the fish are
killed by minute particles of straw,
thorn, lew, rowan or quicken, vine, with a mass of red gold hair In a I want. May I try to win her?”
ash, spindle-tree, pine, elder, willow, faded gown of blue. Her wide hat
And looking .up into his eager eyes from this refuse, entering their gills
A Dog That Swam Guard.
and shutting off their supply of oxy­
furze, heath.
was crowned by a wreath of wheat she promised, “Yes.”
Shep was a black-and-tan Scotch
gen.
in the ancient Gaelic alphabet the
collie. One day he went with the fam­ letter h (the huath or whitethorn) and a band of scarlet popples drooped
The strawboard companies say, as
ily and some friends to the little does not exist The alphabet Is called in her hand.
American “Slovs«’<ness.”
Indicative of the purity of the water
Even the girl who .had protested
stream just below our camp grounds. the beth-luls-nuln, because b 1 n, and
Public untidiness is a national fault. In the streams below their mills, that
The .children wqre going bathing, arid not aba, are Its first three letters.— was forced to admit the beauty of the Tt Is more noticeable in cities, by its cattle on farms will leave the pure
spot
upon
which
they
finally
came.
Shep was very foni’ of the water, So
It was a place of greenness and of massing there than elsewhere, but water of the streams to drink that
he swam back and forth in the stream, Youth’s Companion.
dimness, of murmuring water and of even the roadsides In the “sweet, pure which is slightly colored with the ref-
just at the edge of the swift cürrent,
country" are often terribly unkempt use from the strawboard mills, and
crooning winds.
and would not allow the children to
Good Animal Story, If True.
and have the air of being made a the companies further say that milk
"There
Is
actually
a
breeze,
”
the
get
Into
thé
swift
water.
Miss Schreecher—Have you flnlshea
Near a farmhouse in the Midlands
convenient dumping ground. H. G. and butter from cow® drinking the
older
womaq
said.
“
One
scarcely
felt
This
was
commented
on
by
the
old
­
your song?
of England was a large pond and on
Wells, when In this country, was adulterated water is purer and sweet­
It
ip
the
sun.
”
The
chauffeur
un
­
er persons, but a skeptical lad said it’ the lawn between it and the house an
i Steele Ayers (a composer)—Yes.
much struck In his railroad journeys er than any other.
i Miss Schreecher—Looking for 8 was not so. Then, to show he wa? old family horse used to graze, One packed the lunch hamper, spread a by the slovenly look of village streets
right, he went out to the swift water day someone left a baby asleep on a white cloth on a flat rock and set and by the appalling amount of waste
^■publisher?
t Steele Ayers—No; looking for an and tried to get past Shep. This he blanket under a tree7 not far from thereon a feast fit for the gods. The matter everywhere flung about. We
could not do. Shep, however, In his the pond. When it awoke it saw some eyes of the fortune teller followed have so long been used to having all HUNG HER CASH OUT TO DRY
^fedvertiser.
efforts to keep the lad back, got Into swans on the pond, and began to creep every movement, but when Oswald outdoors In which to throw things
the swift current, and was swept down towards the water. It had got almost filial a plate with- .good things and that we are In danger of forgetting Delaware Woman Forgot Big Roll of
Too Much For It.
handed it to her she drew back. “Not
the stream, but he soon returned and
Bills Until It Was Almost
■ Mrs. Crank (excitedly)—You public took his old station, where he continu­ to the water’s edge when the horse unless you let me tell your fortune.” how much like the neighborhood of a
Too Late.
trotted
up
gently
anc
gathered
the
Zulu
kraal
we
often
make
our
outly
­
Officials are not doing your.duty, sir! ed to swim guard over the children as baby’s clothes in his teeth and carried
“Come, Oswald,” an iinpa-tient voice ing regions appear. Travelers from
Here I was bitten by a dog and im- before.—Christian World.
It up to the house. The baby was star­ Interposed.
Rehoboth, Del.—A week’s washing
abroad are invariably Impressed by
niediately after it fell into a At.
“In a moment, Sylvia. I am going this, and not favorably, while many of $5 bills, pinned on a line to dry,
tled and began to cry, and the moth­
■ Public Official (feeling)—No won-
er rushed out of the house and found to have my fortune told.”
a returned American tourist, after a was the result of a bath which Mrs.
Art As It Is.
der, poor animal!
“Oswald!”
This time it was the sojourn In neat France, for example, Dantol Townsend took and in which
her child dangling from the horse’s
"Among the students who did most mouth. She quickly took it, and the older woman’s voice,
Is painfully struck by what one patri­ no one can understand why the money
to prevent my task being a sinecure,”' good old hor-se, whinnying gently,
The fortune teller bent over his otic youth called the “slouchy” ap- did not drift out to sea.
An Ordinary Flight,
says
Mr.
Beckwith,
“
was
one
young
hand
eagerly,
She
told
him
many
pearance of his own land.
Mrs. Townsend is the wife of a
9 ^KWhen your husband entered thv ■woman whose backwardness and total went back to his grazing.
trivial things at first, things at which
aviation contest, did he fly into the lack of interest finally roused my Ire.
prominent Rehoboth hotel man, and in
Sylvia and her mother smiled. At
cwuds?'
taking her usual surf bath she did,
While criticising an unusually bad
The Mob.
last, however, she spoke of deeper
Town Crier.
■No; the machinery broke dawn piece of her work I asked, exasperat-
not remove that portion of her apparel
A mob Is of society of bodies volun­ matters, of business and of marriage
A quaint survivor of colonial days which the average woman uses as her
QKnd he flew into a rage?
edly: 'Why do you come here, any­ tarily bereaving themselves of reason and he gazed at her In wonder.
is the town crier of Provincetown. pocketbook.
way?*
and traversing Its work.- A mob Is
“How did you know these things?” This official, once found in every New During the bath the surf played Its
“ ‘Because,’ she answered, ‘my twin man voluntarily descending to the na­ he demanded.
Very Flat.
England town, now survives only In usual pranks, and, although the bands
you ever see where they are sister takes her banjo lesson at just ture of the beast. Its fit hour of ac­ W "I know—” her voice was tremu­ Provincetown and In Nantucket. He used
to hold the money in its place
this
hour,
and
I
have
to
do
something,
tivity Is night. Its actions are insane, lous, but suddenly she lifted her head Is on the street almost daily in Prov­
»Ing collapsible bathtubs and folding
so I thought I would study art.’ "—Mc­ like Its whole constitution. It perse­ and her eyes flashed. “There are incetown announcing a show at the were several times loosened, the
_MMranges now?”
.trWhat for?”
Dougall’s Magazine.
cutes a principle; It would whip a things—things that I cannot tell you town hall, a cake sale- at a church, money was found Intact, although re­
right; it would tar and feather jus­ now." She looked at the two wom­ grand bargains at the shops, or new duced almost to a pulp when Mrs.
“Naturally, for flat housekeeping."
Townsend started to remove the bath­
tice, by Inflicting Are and outrage up­ en and he understood.
reels at the motion picture show.
ing
apparel.
,
«
Avoiding Extremes.
on the houses and persons of those
"Some other time, then?" he mur­
It took several hours of careful dry­
Different Music.
“I don’t care to employ a young man who have these. It resembles the mured.
“Does your son generally play who swears.”
ing on an improvised lln% before the
True Form of Charity,
prank of boys who run with Are en­
She nodded.
"Is ft worth my
Chopin and Mendelssohn?”
The charity that thlnketh no evil bills were in shape to be taken to a
“I never use profanity, sir.”
gines to put out the ruddy aurora lunch?" •
“No, madam; he mostly plays the
bank and redeemed for more sub­
“On the other hand, I don't want a streaming to the stars.—R. W. Emen
"Indeed, yes,” and he brought her trusts in God and trusts in men.- stantial ones.
races.*
clerk who says, *Oh, fudge.***
son.
all the delicacies upon which th* Timothy Titoon
and
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