Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About Vernonia's voice. (Vernonia, OR) 2007-current | View Entire Issue (April 4, 2019)
in other words april4 2019 17 The Hobo Corner: Testimonials and Snitches By Jack Kauppila Hey Everyone - It’s Jack here, from the Hobo Bakery in Vernonia, my new hometown. My beautiful, sweet, little town where I feel more at home than I’ve ever felt before. I caught myself recently, sitting on the front porch with my sweet sweet Mary. There were dogs at our feet, the whine of a chainsaw in the distance, wood smoke in the air, and a cool lemonade on the table between us. And all we had to do was be there and love it. What a dream… This month we have our first customer testimo- nial and my first big snitch! Now, I try to keep the Hobo Bakery patron’s identities anonymous - it’s nobody’s dang business who’s double-dipping into the cinnamon rolls, or how many maple-spice donuts Mr. Larry is eating. But two of our dearest customers have given me permission to write up a glowing testimonial on which they promised to sign off. Sounds dangerous, I know! Donna and Brian have been there from the start for the Hobo Bakery. They love what I bake and they know I do it all for love and service - they really seem to get what we’re up to around here. Their enthusiasm and support has been constant, and their feedback just melted my heart one particular weekend. Especially considering what happened the week or so before. And then what happened next… Buckle up - here comes the big snitch! So the other day Donna and Brian got a Chupa- cabra Boule (yup, all that sharp cheddar cheese and hot jalapenos comes in boules!) and told me all about it on their next visit - “Jack that Chupacabra bread was amazing! We started tearing into it in the car and we just couldn’t stop!” In fact it caused a bit of conflict when Donna pointed out that if they didn’t stop eating, the whole thing was going to be gone before dinner time! But Brian wasn’t done yet and Donna was having too much fun picking around the jalapenos to enjoy the soft, pil- lowy, cheesylicious bread to stop, so they nibbled the rest of the way home in silent acquiescence. I LOVE THAT! I don’t, however, like why they got a chupie boule in the first place… I like to make my Hobo bread to order - I like to know who I’m baking for, so I can fill the order with all the peace and love and mindfulness my process can bring. And my heart just breaks when I have orphaned boules, so I need to know they have a loving home. I have people email me, or stop by the bakery, and Don- up again. na has been great about getting her orders in right on I offered Donna an additional Jackie and Chu- time. pie, hoping that through some sort of Freaky Friday So, in good faith, Donna placed an order the exchange they might swap fillings somehow. Donna other day for two boules of Hobo Olive for a gathering graciously (again) accepted and we went on with our (the perfect thing for any gathering!), with a Saturday days, my heart not quite so warm as before. pickup. I immediately replied “of course we’ll have I snitch because I care. I used to call it ‘ratting that for you! Thanks for the order!” and promptly set myself out,’ but I don’t think we want to associate rats about not thinking of it again! with a bakery so... Saturday rolled around as scheduled and Donna I want to own my mistakes, learn from them came in, as scheduled, and I had completely forgotten and make everything better because of them. I will do about her order! Aaagh! My heart sank to the bottom whatever I can to make it up to you. Of course maybe of the deep dark sea as I walked out to face up to my these weren’t mistakes as much as happy accidents… horrible horrible negligence. Donna was disappointed No, I’m not trying to wiggle off the hook! Lis- and I was mortified - if there’s one dang thing I should ten: be able to do it’s get people what they order! So, forgetting the first order got Donna and I offered what I had available, part of which Brian to try a Chupie boule, leading to our first cus- was a still-warm-from-the-oven Chupacabra boule. tomer testimonial. Donna shared her disappointment (she’s not a jalapeno Then, the very next day, one of my favorites fan), but acknowledged I owned my mistake and ac- came in and said “Jack, did you do something different cepted the replacement boule. with those jalapeno rolls? Mine seemed to have pickles And that brings us current, almost… in it!” As I mentioned, Donna and Brian raved about oh, please not again… that chupie boule when I saw them next, even suggest- “That was awesome!” he raved. “I think you’re ing that I include customer testimonial in my writings on to something - I love that mix of spicy/sweet!” and that I could start with them. Not once did they men- And there you have it! The second mistake tion that the reason they had that bread to begin with led to the birth of the ChupaLope! Spicy jalapenos was because I screwed up! and sweet bread and butter pickles with sharp cheddar That might just be the definition of Grace. cheese, suspended in my luscious hobo white bread. They picked up a Chupie and a Jackie (the That’s all I have from the Hobo Corner this Chupie’s kinder, gentler cousin the Jackelope, with month. Thank you all for your time and patience. sharp cheddar and sweet bread and butter pickles) for Peace and Happy Happy Toasting! the road and we all went about our day with a warm feeling in our hearts. Almost… Soon the front door dinged and poor, sweet Donna was back. “Brian didn’t want to be the bearer of bad news,” she began, “but I said you’d want to know…” Bumbum buuuuuuummmmm… “The Chupacabra with the jalapeno Vernonia School District Superintendent Aaron Mill- on top is filled with pickles and my Jack- er will be holding several Community-Superintendent Chats elope is full of jalapenos!” throughout the 2019 school year. These informal meetings are STOP THE BUS! I WANNA GET meant to provide another avenue for parents and other com- OFF! munity members to hear about some of the great things that are Now remember, you liked me when happening in our schools, and to ask questions regarding any we started this article. aspects of education here in Vernonia, the State of Oregon, and I had rolled out our Jackies and Chu- the nation. pies that morning, making ABSOLUTELY The rest of the year’s schedule is listed below. If you SURE that I marked them with a pickle or a are unable to attend one of these meetings, Superintendent jalapeno, so as to avoid confusion. Oh holy Miller is available to answer questions or address concerns by monkeys, how do I do it? appointment at the District Office: (503) 429-5891. I got to practice owning my screw- Community/ Superintendent Wednesday Chats CASA for Children to Host their 28 th Annual Auction On Friday, April 5 CASA for Children of Multnomah, Washington, and Columbia Counties will host their 28 th Annual Auction at the Portland Art Museum. In 2018, this event raised more than $780,000 thanks to the generosity of Portland-area individuals, corporations, and foundations. This sig- nature gala, a sold-out event for the past several years, features a silent and live auction, wall of wine, and various raffles. It is among Portland’s best loved and anticipated charity events. Nearly 550 guests will gather at the Portland Art Museum for an evening of philanthropy, gourmet cuisine, C H I RO P R AC T I C C L I N I C, I NC. and a stellar selection of fine Oregon wines. Guests represent a wide range of business and community leaders. Many are VernoniaChiro.com long-time supporters who use this event as an opportunity to Joseph Dombek, DC introduce new individuals to our organization. All proceeds raised from the Auction directly im- pact CASA’s ability to serve more children with a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA) volunteer. A CASA Now Accepting New Patients 610 Bridge Street • Vernonia, OR 97064 passionately and tirelessly works to guide a child through the trauma of the court system. Oregon law gives CASAs unusual authority as a ‘party to the case’ so that they are able to ensure that the system does not ignore a child’s needs and that the judge has the information to act in the child’s best in- terests. A CASA is trained to work with judges, social work- ers, teachers, foster parents, and family members to ensure that the safety and well-being of the child is front and center. If you are interested in helping make a difference in a foster child’s life, please contact Laura Collins, Interim Di- rector of Development and Communications, at (503) 988- 4170 or lcollins@casahelpskids.org. April 24 Vernonia Schools 6-7 pm May 29 Blue House Café 12-1 pm Reliability comes in all sizes. Rugged versatility is what makes Kubota tractors the perfect choice for getting every job done right. And now the payment plan is as efficient as the machines. Get $0 down, 0% A.P.R. financing for 84 months. Visit us today. VERNONIA BX Series B Series L Series (971) 248-4055 0 DOWN 0 % APR 84 MONTHS $ 1221 SW Baseline St. Hillsboro, OR 97123 M-F 8-5:30 and Sat 9-5 (503) 648-3841 www.pactractor.com KubotaUSA.com © Kubota Tractor Corporation 2019. 0% Down, 0% A.P.R. fi nancing for up to 84 months on purchases of select new Kubota BX, B and Standard L Series equipment from participating dealers’ in the state of Oregon with in-stock inventory. Offer is available to qualifi ed purchasers through Kubota Credit Corporation, U.S.A.; subject to credit approval. Some exceptions apply. Example: 84 monthly payments of $11.90 per $1,000 fi nanced. Offer expires 6/30/19. See us or go to KubotaUSA.com for more information.