in other words
may5
2016
Better Parenting: Where Did You Learn to Act Like That?
By Sonia Spackman
A study from the University of
Michigan states that most kids spend
more time in front of the TV than doing
anything else except sleeping - 28 hours
per week!
This gives an enormous expo-
sure to some really bad behavior. Dr.
Cynthia Scheibe analyzed how much of
children’s TV contained insults. You will
be surprised to read that close to two-
thirds of “pro-social” TV shows to edu-
cate young children have characters that
insult each other. Regular TV programs
have insulting behavior 96% of the time.
So what do these insulting nasty
behaviors have to do with your kids?
• A lot! Schools deal with the fallout ev-
ery day. Researchers have studied acts
of violence and the effect it has on kids.
Much of their behavior is intended to
hurt other kids by telling lies or secrets,
or gossiping about friends to other kids.
Hurtful behavior is done purposefully
like leaving some kids out, ignoring or
picking on kids. These are behaviors that
some kids use to make themselves more
popular.
• The more kids watch, the worse they
think. “The more kids watched, the
crueler they would be to their class-
mates,” reported Jamie Ostrove, one of
the study’s authors. Kids were 2.5 times
more likely to be bossy, controlling, and
manipulative than violent in their ag-
gression.
• Kids are learning tactics and becoming
expert bullies. One study revealed boys
tend to be physically aggressive and
girls to be relationally aggressive. They
report that kids’ friendships are worse
the more TV they watch.
• Kids love the shows that are spicy and
full of unchecked meanness. In one epi-
sode of a popular show a girl made fun
of her friend who likes things she con-
siders “nerdy.” She called her brother
a “loser” because of the way he speaks.
And in a subplot on the same show one
of the characters portrayed an elderly
grandfather as an idiot. So what is the
lesson for the kids that are watching, ex-
cept to be cool like these characters and
learn their language?
• Over time relational aggression is very
damaging. A study in the Journal of
Communication reported that victims of
bullying suffer from lower self-esteem,
loneliness, depression, anxiety, and in
extreme cases are more likely to think
suicidal thoughts or consider homicidal
actions.
• There are no adult corrections or repri-
mands, or any apologies given. There is
no consequence shown for any of these
behaviors. Some of these comedies make
it normal for kids to interrupt, insult and
dismiss each other and not feel bad about
it or experience any consequences.
Things parents can try to turn
their kids in the right direction:
1. Identify family issues that contribute
to bullying or disrespectful behavior.
Read books or play games that help chil-
dren become more sensitive about the
causes and effects of bullying and disre-
spectful behavior.
2. Teach your child LIMITS at home on
wrong behaviors. Let them know that
it is not ok to insult adults or call their
brother a loser, or to ridicule or mistreat
friends or to do any of the unpleasant
things popular characters on TV do to
each other.
3. Teach your child COURAGE. Teach
them that doing what is right is not al-
ways popular. When they see a wrong, to
tell an adult is not easy. Ask your child to
“practice” courage by doing something
he or she knows is right. Ask your child
to share the experience with you.
5. Teach your child about SAFETY, ex-
plaining how to act like a safe person.
Explain how they can keep themselves
safe and to care about how others feel.
Ask them to “practice” by asking one
person each day how they feel, especial-
ly someone who is being picked on. Tell
them you would be interested in hearing
about it.
6. Teach your child KINDNESS and how
everyone has a battle they go through,
and how we treat people can make
things better or worse. Ask your child to
have compassion and understanding for
those who seem to need it and tell them
you would love to have them share their
experiences with you.
7. Teach your child about BREAKING
Megan Zavales
Michael Holmes
Grade 8
Micheal is known as a kind, polite, hardworking
and creative student, who shows thoughtful
consideration and effort. “He is not afraid to think
outside the box and his creativity is evident in
everything he does,” says one of his teachers. “He
has a lot of talent and the perseverance to get his
work done and do it well.” Michael says his favorite
subject is art. Outside of school, he is involved in
4-H and shows dairy cows.
Jared Medearis
alley overnight following the return from
a camping trip. Council referred the issue
to staff, who said they would speak with
the Grants about the issue the next day.
Sharon Bernal asked Council
to please meet with her to discuss the
development issues at Nickerson Ridge
Estates before they make any final
decision. The City is in negotiations
with the owners of the property and have
declined to issue any further building
permits at the development until the
dispute has been settled.
Grade 12
Jared is running track this spring, played football,
was part of the State Championship basketball
team, and plays trombone in the band. He says his
favorite subject is math and he also enjoys choir.
He just received his Eagle Scout Award for his
project to clean up Spencer Park. He is planning
to go on a church mission after graduation and
then attend BYU to play football and study
software engineering.
Sponsored by State Representative Brad Witt
DM
D
Vernonia
Veterinary Clinic
Small and Large Animals
e rm
an
call Kim
Grade 5
Megan's teacher says she is “an amazing young
lady” who works hard, tries her best and excels in
her studies. She is always willing to help others and
does so with patience and kindness. Megan has an
infectious personality. She always wears a smile on
her face. She is definitely setting herself up for
success.
Vernonia
Dental
291
A
Street
Resources: Martha Brockenbrough,
MSN TV, Dr. Cynthia Scheibe
March 2016
continued from page 5
Topics From the Floor – Jason and
Andrea Grant asked for clarification on
the city ordinance concerning obstruction
of a public right-of-way. The Grants told
the Council they have been warned in
the past about having their travel trailer
in the alley next to their house and have
complied. They recently received a $500
citation when they left the trailer in the
HABITS. In fact, tell yourself that it
takes courage to change, that breaking a
habit starts by practicing doing what you
want to do and practice not doing what
you want to stop doing.
As a parent I hope we all promote
kindness, courage, respect and positive
habits in our own life, in our families
and with our children where adults will
ask our kids: “Where did you learn to act
like that?”
If you have any comments or
questions feel free to e-mail soniaspack-
man@msn.com.
Vernonia Students of the Month
Vernonia City News...
by law from public inspection. Council
took no further action upon returning to
open session.
13
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