PAGE TWO ROGUE NEWS Friday, March 27. 1953 ROGUE NEWS ip"giy Published every month by the Journalism class of the Ashland High School, Ashland, Oregon Miss Laura Hcrshey, Advisor EDI 1 OR IN-CHIEF. Pat Abbott NEWS EDITOR ... Ralph Zeller FEATURE EDITOR Barbara Van Fleet EXCHANGE EDITOR Paul Clute CLUB EDITOR Betty Brenner SPORTS EDITOR . Jim Jeffries ASSISTANT SPORTS EDITOR Richard Taylor BUSINESS MANAGER Ben Heitz ASSISTANT BUSINESS MANAGER . Pat Wells REPORTERS: Joan Woods, Janice Carter, Leroy Hill, Ken Dailey, Tracy Bowman, Richard Booth, Sid Knox. Barb's Barbs Are You an Excuse Maker? "The alarm clock never went off." How often have you heard or used that excuse yourself when you were late to school? Another excuse, which is perhaps the most common, is "The clocks are all stopped at our house." Now, we're not saying that isn't right but for those who are constantly late, you should hear some of the excuses! Some are always the same, "The car broke down on the way to school." But there's variety in others. "The cows got out and we had to chase them back in before I could come to school," or "Grandma's rock ing chair broke and she made me fix it before I left." How many of you just make excuses instead of coming right out and saying you didn't want to get up, or couldn't decide which sweater to wear? We all have to learn to be on time sometime, and if you don't start now, you'll always be late wherever you go. Lateness is only a form of laziness. When you get a job, punctuality is an important factor in determining whether or not you will keep the job. Even if your qualifications are a little better than the next fellow's the employer will keep the one who's prompt before the one who is "always late." Sure, we all have mornings when we'd just as soon sleep, but we have to learn to be punctual, too. The students who are habitually late, always seem to "have the excuses." So why don't you kids who are always late turn over a new leaf and try to be on time. You'll not have to spend an extra 20 minutes at school, and you'll find you're happier too! Cooperation MeritsjThanks Seems like every issue of the paper we literally "bawl" you kids out for something. It seems like we never commend you on anything, you do. But this time we're going to do it, believe it or not. Every noon hour for the past couple of months, with the exception of the last three weeks, students have been cutting across the lawns in front of the school so much that there was a regular path being worn from one sidewalk to another. Stakes were put up to prevent this, but they still didn't stop some. Then Clyde James, president of the Student Body, made an appeal to the students to "stay off the grass to give it a chance to grow." In pcevious years there had been attempts to get the students to stay off the grass, but most attempts ended in failure. Not this time, however, thanks to the wonderful cooperation of the students. Not one student has been observed walking across the lawn deliberately. Of course, there are a few who forget, but not very many. So here a big "thank you" to all of you. It takes just a minute or two longer to use the sidewalks, we know, but you'll be glad you stayed off of it because i we should have a beautiful lawn. By BARBARA VAN VLEET , Last edition of the paper, I got so carried away, I didn't include any gossip. But here's a little to make up for it. Gayle Bear certainly gets in teresting letters from a certain sailor named Don. What about Dickie, Gayle? One of the sophomore gals gets quite thirsty now and then. Not mentioning any names but her initials are Nancy Bundock. Guess you'll have to carry your own bottle Irom now on, Nancy! Through the grapevine the other day, I found out Glen Ingle's middle name. Fabrick is a nice middle name, Glen. Augustus is Marvin Gardner's middle name. And speaking of things we didn't know, did you know that Tad Evatt's first name isn't "Tad?" Confjsing, isn't it? His real name is Le roy David. Cathy Clark, Colette Perrine and Ann Colley's hair seemed to have changed color over night. Ronnie Nosier and Ken na Gandee must have used the same stuff. Was it? Pat Wells and Glenda Win ner certainly are getting ut - sociable. Everytime someone tries to talk to them out at the Drive-In, they roll the windows up in the car and lock the doors. Guilty consciences. I hear Bruce Hamilton was out chasing chickens the other day. Only one catch this time they were the real thing the feathered kind. You had better learn a little more about them. We've heard some complaints from the teachers lately about rowdy students, so in closing, I'd like to include a ftw rules for the "ideal student." 1. Do not run downstairs sliding down bannisters is more fun. 2. Do not stay away from school activities come and be a big tease. We like that. 3. Do not chew gum smack ing it sounds better. 4. Do not push in crowded halls knocking everyone down ;s greater sport. 5. Do not talk out in class screaming will get more What is a Kiss? A kiss is a noun because it's common and proper. A kiss is a pronoun because it s possessive. A kiss is a verb because it acts upon the subject. A kiss is an adverb because it modifies an act. A kiss is cause it makes clear the mean ing. A kiss is a preposition be cause it is used to show relationship. A kiss is a conjunction be cause it brings two things together. A kiss is an interjection be cause it shows feeling. A kiss is a sentence because it expresses a complete thought. Eagles Cup, Anchorage, Alaska attention. 6. Do not throw small pieces of paper on the floor the bigger the better. 7. Do not ditch classes tak ing the whole day off gives you greater pleasure. 8. Do not get the other pu pil's lessons making them gets yours gives you more fun. 9. Do not tell small false hoods make it a big story. 10. Cooperate with others in school starting fights is . more interesting, how ever. Borrowed. Happy Birthday March 27 David Carter 30 Lee Roy Barger 31 Shirlene Folks April 2 Shirley Rolie 2 Sandra Clary Taylor' 3 Chris Temple 5 Guy Fletcher 6 Jim Hall 7 Nancy Bundock 11 Mary Jean Davis 11 La Verne Haptonstall 14 Gail Cruson 15 Betty Blatter 16 Roma Winner 17 Harold Silver 22 Allen Winters 23 Bobby Brewer 23 Bob Simmonds 24 Doyle Hutchinson 25 Marvin Harkey 2 Karl Burt 30 Pat Nicholson Senior Alphabet A-ctive Nancy Graber B-ashfal Bob Delsman C-ute Pat Zimmerlee D-arling Barbara Owen E-fficient Glen Ingle F-un Ann Colley G-ood Looking Corwin Tobiasson H appy Carole Jean Culp ' I-ndustrious Nancy Dunkeson J-oker Dick McNernev K-ind Barbara Hall L-ikeable Norma Stephens M-asculine La Verne Haptonstall N-ice Joan Day Anderson O-rnery Barbara Van Vleet P-retty Shirlene Folks Q-uiet Glenn Holzhouser Murder In The Dungeon .... By JANICE CARTER It was at 8 a. m. the next morning that the body of Herb Lewis was found. Lee Johnson was on his way to the Chem. Lab. He came down the stairs whistling. The light switch didn't work; so he went on into the semi -darkness. Lee's foot hit something solid he paused and stooped over. "My word, a body!" Quickly he drew his lighter from his pocket and flicked it on. "Herb!" The police had pictures taken and kept everyone off the lower floor in case they should wipe out some vital clue. But no clues were found. Gene Allison paced the floor of his office. His brow was wrinkled; his eyes held the look of a haunted man. "Should I tell them of the note I received? Can I?" He fumbled with a folded piece of paper. It read: "You are next." (Signed) The Dungeon Phantom "Mr. Allison." Eileen Wright stood in the doorway with a steaming cup of coffee. I brought some hot. coffee for you." "Thanks." Eileen set the coffee before him and left. An hour later Gene Allison was found unconscious; they rushed him to the hospital. He had been given a severe dose of poison. All teachers were questioned again. Eileen Wright was taken into custody. Students were grilled, and that afternoon the furnace exploded killing ten students and injuring seventy. The population of Ashland withdrew into their homes be hind locked doors with a dead ly f 3ar of the "Dungeon Phan tom in their hearts! ..Continued next month) Reliable Betty Smith S-illy Judy Briggs T-all Gregg Lininger U-seful Ben Heitz V-ersatile Collete Perrine X-tra Special Barbara Bugbee Y-outhful Ida -Smith Z-any Pauline Davis The Long and Short of It! Burglar: "Quiet you, if you want to 6tay alive! I'm looking for the money your wife has concealed." Husband: "Good! Switch on the light and I'll join you!" Wolf Howlea Auntie: "And what will you do, my dear, when you grow up to be as big as me?" Child: "Reducel" - Bruice Hamilton (to sales man): "I'd like to try oh that outfit In the window." Car of the Month If you've seen a little blue "32" Ford coupe around the school, you can bet it's Andy De Korte s pride and joy. He recently traded his "35" Ford sedan for it. Front fenders have been re moved and replaced by small guide fenders, which turn with the wheels. Rear fenders are bobbed; tires are white side wall with red wheels; the steer ing wheel is from a "40" Lin coln. Also this car has "38" Buick tail lights. Andy's car Barbara: "What makes your has its original upholstery. nose so red?" The small four cylinder en- Kenny: "Glasses, Barb, j gine has been hopped up and glasses!" I partially chromed. Andy is re- Barbara; "Glasses of what?" placing the engine with a latr "The Prospector" .model V8. Clerk: "Oh, that isn't neces sary, young man. We have dressing rooms in the back." I don't like these pictures. They don't do me justice. Justice! What you need is mercy. "The Whirlwind" Are you so tall that your clothes never fit? Or are you just so short that you can't see adjective be-1 in crowds? This seems to be the case with a few of our high school boys! A six foot, six senior seems to be the tallest boy at A. S. H. Although Gregg Lininger likes being tall, he says it has some disadvantages "chairs and clothes never seem to fit! But then, you can always see in a crowd." His pet peeve is peo ple who brightly remark, "Hey, how s the weather up there? With all his height, Gregg is a very good basketball player. He also belongs to DeMolay, Co-Ed, Hi Y and Letterman's Club. By the way, he is a na tive Ashlander it must be the Lithia water that does these things. Another native Oregonian, from Roseburg, this time, is Jimmie Smith, a sophomore. ;But "Smitty" is a little shorter man uregg five feet, two inches tall to be exact. Jimmie says his height isn't too bad, but he would rather be just a little taller, maybe about seven feet tall! Although Smitty needs a few more inches to be a profession al basketball player, he did quite well this year as manager for the team. It seems he was just the right size for throwing in the shower! Four feet, eleven and one hall Inches, a sophomore who is out for the mile In track who could that be? Charles Daily is the shortest boy at Ashland High School. Chuck, another sophomore, likes his height very much, but he says that another few inches would come in handy "when in a movie with tall people in front of me." Charles hails from Shastine, California, and has another dis tinction. He really travels each days 52 miles. He lives 26 miles up on tie Greensprincs, but with all that way to go he has been absent only twice this year. rr Mm1 J X 1 Sophomores really look up to their elieri don't theyl Left to right: Jlmy Smith. Gregfl lininger, CharW Daily.