tions like Canada and Massachusetts will find
their marriage status holds in Washington as
well. According to Allen, this can get tricky:
“There are many couples now who have mar-
ried in a variety of jurisdictions, and registered
as domestic partners as well. The problem that
has occurred for a lot of people is that if they
decide to divorce, they will have to follow the
procedures of those jurisdictions one by one.”
Automatic recognition is a comfort to some
Oregon couples that previously wed elsewhere.
Campbell states excitedly at the time of this in-
terview, “We are married in Washington as of
last night!”
DOMA DOWNER: THE FEDS
BLOCK GAY MARRIAGE
At the time this article is being written, the
Supreme Court is reviewing a major case that
challenges DOMA, the Defense of Marriage
Amendment that makes federal recognition of
same-sex marriage illegal. For the past several
years, same-sex couples that wed in marriage-
equality states have been effectively blocked
from receiving the types of federal benefits
that heterosexual spouses get. “The Wind-
sor case,” explains Johnson Roberts, “Asks
whether the federal government can officially
block marriage contracted under state law. If
that case is favorably decided, what it means is
that married couples in places like Washing-
ton can access federal benefits like social se-
curity.” There’s also a good chance that the fall
of DOMA would persuade legislators in states
that currently offer domestic partnerships to
immediately legalize same-sex marriage: “The
suggestion is that if DOMA were to fall, the fed
might look at Domestic Partnership as equiva-
lent to a marriage,” says Johnson Roberts.
In the meantime, DOMA prevents a range of
benefits from trickling down to both legally
married couples and registered domestic part-
ners.
JUST IN CASE: COVER YOUR
ASS ACROSS STATE LINES
As Allen points out, extra paperwork is espe-
cially vital for same-sex parents, even those
who are endowed with automatic second-
parent status under the Oregon registered do-
mestic partnership. “If a [registered] lesbian
couple has a child using a sperm donor,” Allen
says, “The non-birth mom will be on the birth
certificate also, and they have equal status as
parents under the law. The problem with that
is if you step outside of Oregon, not all states
will recognize the second mom. Registered
or not, all couples should do a second parent
adoption. A birth certificate is not a sufficient
February 2013
federal document.” Same goes for other rights
endowed by marriage and domestic partner-
ship, such as power of attorney in case of ill-
ness. If you want it to be recognized outside of
the state, you need to make sure to consult with
a lawyer and do the extra paperwork necessary
to make sure those rights are in place wherever
you travel. Johnson Roberts tells his clients to
“think of it like a flashlight — in one state it’s
on, then you go to another state and it turns off.
It’s a crazy system, but it’s what we’re stuck with
for the time being.”
THE ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM:
SEPARATION AND THE GAY DIVORCÉE
Ironically, Johnson Roberts says most of his cli-
ents these days need help splitting up. The more
convoluted the process of legalizing same-sex
partnership becomes, the more complicated
it is to get divorced. Let’s say there’s a lesbian
couple who is married in Canada, registered
as domestic partners in New York, registered
in Oregon, and who also took extra steps to
make sure they were covered in each other’s
wills and property on a permanent, nation-
wide level. If that couple finds that they want to
separate, they now need to dissolve every one
of those contracts separately. That can be made
especially complex given the residency require-
ments of some jurisdictions; for example, to get
divorced in Canada you must reside in Canada
for a minimum period of time. Each area is go-
ing to have its own unique requirements for
separations and dissolutions, so an exit plan
is an important part of marriage, despite the
fact that most newlyweds aren’t exactly think-
ing about divorce. “For us, it was kind of a plus
not to be able to get divorced,” says Clark. “We
pretty much considered it a permanent thing.”
Indeed, there are other reasons a couple might
not give much thought to the divorce process
— after all, if your marriage isn’t even legal
under federal law, then the marriage is purely
symbolic, right? But this will become a larger
problem as the country gets closer to repealing
DOMA, and as more states add gay marriage.
It is also something to be concerned about in
regard to future partnerships. Regardless of the
reasoning, understanding the whole course of
action is essential before getting hitched.§
Checklist
for
Registered
Domestic
Partners:
To file for partnership, go to
the county marriage office in
the county where one or both
partners reside. Only one per-
son in the couple needs to re-
side in the county.
Name changes are automatic
within Oregon, but won’t be
recognized elsewhere unless
you go to court to obtain an
official name change.
Adoption papers are abso-
lutely necessary for families
with children — even though
female same-sex partners are
automatically given state par-
entage, it won’t be recognized
elsewhere without second
parent adoption.
Federal employees should
keep in mind that their job
benefits won’t be available to
partners.
Remember, getting married
somewhere else does not
mean your marriage is recog-
nized in Oregon. You still need
to become Registered Domes-
tic Partners.
Once you get registered, both
of your wills are revoked and
you need to write new ones.
Mary Emily O’Hara is a freelance writer living in Portland.
A native New Yorker, her passions range from the political
economics of the art world to pole dancing. She spends
her free time with her girlfriend and their three crazy dogs.
Her writing can be found at maryemilyohara.com.
Visit the state website to down-
load forms and get more infor-
mation: public.health.oregon.
gov/BirthDeathCertificates/
RegisterVitalRecords
JustOut.com
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