JS_6
voices*
The Space Between
FEBRUARY 18. 2011
W ildlife biologist Fred Barkalow wrote the
following about gray squirrels: “If you can ig
nore having your furniture chewed to hits, the
draperies shredded and droppings scattered
willy-nilly about the house, the gray squirrel is
the pet for you.” Still, Googling pet squirrel
yields loads of entries with detailed instruc
tions about raising these members of Rodentia
from babies; obviously fanciers abound. Re
gardless, at our house we’ve come to the con
clusion that the Eastern Gray squirrel does not
a great pet make. It is cute and fluffy, but we
prefer animals that can be housebroken, do not
bite the hand that feeds them— literally— and
do not wreak havoc on the pantry. Squirrels are
not tame animals. Citified? Sure. Acclimated
to people? Yes. Suited to domestic life as a
house pet? Not so much.
W hich brings me once again to the little
Gray who showed up on our doorstep (and
door) a month ago. Currently, she nests in the
box we provided her on our back deck. She
looks for us each morning and again in the
evening. She comes—often running— to the
sound o f my voice when I talk to the chickens
or the dogs. Fearless, she has jumped on me
several times, undeterred by my canine com
pany. Now I tend to carry a walking stick or
broom when in the yard, not to clobber her,
but to discourage her enthusiastic catapulting
approach.
petlandia
Endearing infant squirrels charm
many well-meaning folks. Wide
round eyes outlined in white
and a twitching nose on a palm
sized, affectionate fuzz-ball are
hard to resist. Unfortunately, the
adorable babes grow up.
Squirrels are ridiculously cute as babies. I
know this because a f riend once raised an aban
doned baby someone found and brought to her.
According to my squirrel handbook as well as a
local rehabilitator, endearing infant squirrels
charm many well-meaning folks. Wide round
eyes outlined in white and a twitching nose on
a palm-sized, affectionate fuzz-ball are hard to
resist. Unfortunately, the adorable babes grow
up. Adult squirrels want to go off in the world
and live the life a million years of evolution de
signed them to live. They long to revel in their
f reedom, to run, to climb and to engage in, well,
procreation. Denied the life they’re meant to
live they can become anxious, a bit ornery or
even aggressive. At this point, they are often
W W W .JU S T O U T.C O M
him. She hates the house so I keep her in an
enclosure, but she just looks for an escape.” In
my office, the dog paced nervously and her
white-rimmed eyes darted around the room.
Her breathing was fast and shallow. “She
wouldn’t survive a week on her own. She’s
trapped between worlds.”
In 2009 the Oregon legislature passed a law
banning individuals from owning certain ex
otic animals as pets. As o f January 1 o f this
year, the law is fully in effect and disallows
keeping primates, large cats, canines that are
not domestic dogs, bears and crocodilians (it's
oddly silent on squirrels). Makes sense to me—
lions and tigers and bears, oh my.
Mystery seduces us, whether majestic gray
wolf or common city squirrel. But cute as the
bugger on the back porch may be (as stately
the wolf hybrid, exotic the lion, impressive the
tiger or unusual the chimpanzee), the best bet
for a good life— for her and for us— is to coax
her back to nature. It would have been best not
to start down this path in the first place, or to
stick with it once the choice was made. Now
we’re left to manage humanely what someone
else started and simply left behind: a life in the
space between. J 0 '
unceremoniously thrown out in the backyard,
dumped in the local park or dropped off in an
other neighborhood. W ithout squirrelish social
skills, nest building acumen, food foraging
know-how and suddenly subject to extremes of
weather and a host of predators, alone and lost,
many die within the year. Too wild to live as a
pet, they’re too tame to subsist in the wild. This
is a story I’ve heard before.
Several years back a client contacted me
about chiropractic services for her dog. The
Malamute-Wolf mix she showed up with was
an impressive, confident, self-possessed com
panion. W hen we were finishing our second or
third appointment, the client leaned in and
lowered her voice. “I’d like you to see my other
...” she raised her hands to draw air quotes,
“‘dog’ ... if you catch my drift. She’s from the
same breeder and supposedly the same per
centage but, w ell... you’ll see.”
A week later the woman arrived with her
“dog.” Long-legged and lanky with an elon
gated snout, gray and white mask, and amber
eyes, this striking canine specimen thrilled me
in its proximity. “I’ll never do it again,” the M a r y M a n d e v il l f . practices animal chiroprac
woman told me, her tone firm. “She’s from the tic, writes a blog and is working on a book. Find
same line as my other dog but nothing like her at animotionchiro.com.
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