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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 17, 2010)
M 34 WWWJUSTOUT.COM SEPTEMBER 17 2010 VOICES When James Bond Meets Queer as Folk The longer you live in the same city, the more people you see making exodus. O ur small, perfect circles break as friends we cling to make lives for themselves in different places. As often as I throw temper tantrums when someone I consider family moves on, I also realize how lucky I am to have a close-knit circle circling the globe—or, sometimes, just the country. Since I mostly stay put, save for jaunts to, say, New York or San Francisco, I live vicariously through them, rifling through pictures, emails, letters that temporarily trans port me to places I may never see.Talya works India or Africa. Kody vacations in Vietnam. ’ The list goes on. Friends’journeys, mostly, consist of travels through Europe or Indonesia or other much- coveted destinations. Emails read: “Daniel, I had a dream you were living in Geneva and I saw you in my hotel. You were meeting some one there because you lived and worked in Geneva. A red-headed woman was involved. „ You were happy and reveling in your life. In terpretation?” That's prophecy, my dear—or so I pray. Rarely do friends travel to spots that re main wholly hostile to our being, spots I’d never pick on a map if I had an infinite num ber o f choices. Recently, a very close friend picked one. He works in a region so staunchly opposed to homosexuality, the punishments are unfathomable to us. In an a re a w here p hones are ta p p e d a n d virtu a lly every m ovem ent is m onitored, a system o f survival, o f being. em erges. W hen I go out in Portland, sampling our ever-evolving, expanding queer nights, reveling in drag cabaret or dancing at Vendetta, I some times think about what it might be like to have to hide our love away. Here, we rotate venues but see most o f the same faces week in and week out. Some call it tedious— same faces, different backgrounds— I call it comfortable, like Cheers on wheels. These people are (mostly) friends; aren’t we supposed to be merry with our friends? Imagine if we had to create a co vert system of existing—code words, hand ges tures, camouflaged hideouts. And no, I’m not talking about exploring the complicated world of closeted Republican bathroom sex. In an area where phones are tapped and vir tually every movement is monitored, a system of survival, of being, emerges. My friend, the one in hostile territory, has immersed himself in this James Bond-meets-Queer as Folk sce nario. He and his crew of expatriates and locals have forged their very own gay scene. Living in a religion-centered state, the group has devel oped a gay code rooted in religious terminology. W hile he admits the code makes them all laugh, everyone feels more secure using it. Once a week friends gather for “church.” One in the group typically hosts and prepares dinner for the secret gays. “Church” is mostly used for planning purposes because phones are tapped throughout the country— saying “big gay dinner will be on Wednesday night” isn’t really an option. Also, when communi cating via tapped phone lines, friends use the age-old favorite, “family,” to discuss other members— along with “one o f us.” Thus, gay topics feel comfortable and safe. W hen the “congregation” gathers— and, shockingly, drinks are imbibed— friends en gage in “confession,” when they go around the gay dinner table and share sultry, sexy stories about escapades during R8cR or, more sur prisingly, about scandalous events right in the midst o f enemy territory, which I liken to hav ing gay sex at church camp— exhilarating. Yes, I’ve done it. The group varies in size from week to week and, my friend tells me, smaller gatherings lead to more intimate tales. An older man talked about his experience caring for his ailing part ner, and how different queer times were then. Mostly, the group is large, and gay church be comes rambunctious, especially considering the territory. They’ve been known to karaoke, watch gay films and, yes, have Golden Girls marathons. Even in a region utterly hostile to homosexual ity (so much so that I simply cannot name names), a vibrant queer culture thrives. It seems we’re able to seek each other out and create community, regardless o f obstacles. As my friend regaled me with more adven tures from abroad, I mused. O f course we all know there are gays everywhere, but tangible evidence is nonetheless heartening. As those queers struggle— really struggle— to merely ex ist and socialize, it puts our less urgent gay dra ma into perspective. Like, here, in Portland, aren’t we really all on the same team? Do we need to bicker and fight over what gay cause is morally superior? Does it really matter which side o f the W illamette we live on? O r who we befriend and date? Location, of course, dictates circumstances and pressing needs are, more of ten than not, those o f the moment. J M Note the lack o f specificity re: names/places—fo r safetys sake. Email d a n i e l @ j u s t o u t . c o m . 'A li l i l ’if? OPEN DAILY 4:30PM to 2AM Happy Hour Everyday 4 :3 0 pm to 7 pm 3536 NE MLK (Just North of Fremont) ATM \