____________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ October 1.2004»J—» t o u t|17
urn
mews
HIV S tops
with
T hem
Positive men make positive impact
by K a th y Beige
L
San Diego, Boston, San Fran
raled downward. For the first time he
cisco and Los Angeles. Oregon
was able to experiment with his
launched its campaign in June.
latent bisexuality.
“I knew I wasn’t playing safe.... I
The fiKus of "HIV Stops
just didn’t give a damn," he says. “I
with Me” is the individual sto
was suicidal anyway.”
ries of each of the men. Walk
During one of his hospitaliza
er, 53, has been openly dealing
tions, Van Vleck asked to he tested
with HIV since 1988. He
for HIV. He suspected he was posi
buried two lovers who died
tive because he had been feeling ill
from AIDS-related illnesses
for some time, having night sweats
hut has remained healthy with
and diarrhea.
HIV for more than 16 years.
When the test came back posi
“Those of us who are posi
tive,
“I thought: ‘My little world is
tive can play a role in stop
over. Why go on?’ ”
ping the disease,” he says.
But with the help of the down
Walker, who is African
town HIV Health Services Center,
American, says that especially
Van Vleck was finally able to get
in that community, there is
medication to help him manage his
still a stigma surrounding
mental illness. He found out about
HIV. “ Folks who may be
“ HIV Stops with Me” from an ad
forthcoming with their sexual
placed in Just Out.
orientation may not be with
“I just wanted to do something,”
their HIV status,” he notes.
he says. “I haven’t been able to hold a
Walker is hoping that by
steady job for some time. My message
being such a public face of
is to other positive people, ‘Make it
HIV that those in the
stop with you.’ ”
African American communi
He says that even though he
ty will begin to talk about the
discloses his HIV status, men still
disease and take action to
invite him to have unsafe sex with
stop its spread. “Having a face
him. “ I’m not going to let someone
that looks like them will
else who doesn’t give a shit get it off
make them stop and think.
o f me.”
I’m hoping people will see me
The campaign acknowledges that
and take notice of the mes
Clockwise from top left, John Motter, Jeffery Van Vleck, Chris High and
keeping negative people negative
sage I am trying to convey,"
Jerry Walker were chosen as local spokesmodels for the “ H IV Stops with
should not be the only goal of HIV
Walker says.
Me” campaign
prevention. Even people like Motter,
The campaign’s message is
who knew how to keep himself safe
to encourage those who are
and who watched friends die from A ID S, got
that is necessarily dangerous or had, hut it can
HIV-positive to wear condoms, disclose their
infected with the virus.
lead to adverse consequences.”
status and take responsibility for drug use.
“I graduated from Howard University. I grad
Mitch Zahn, Oregon HIV prevention man
Van Vleck, 34, stmggled with anxiety and
uated summa cum laude. I’m not a dumb person,
depression most of his life growing up in mral
ager, says the state’s campaign is aimed at men
but I certainly made some really stupid choices,”
who have sex with other men because 70 per Washington G>unty. Ravaged hy feelings of guilt
he says.
cent of new cases of HIV in Oregon are gay and
about sexual abuse he experienced as a child, he
But thanks to “ HIV Stops with Me,” Motter
bisexual men. The campaign plans to add a
tried to kill himself twice when he was 14-
and other HIV-positive men and women can
Although he struggled with inner demons, he was
Latino man and a woman as spokesmodels later
able to live a fairly stable life for a time. He mar help others make the smart choice to stop the
this year.
ried and had two children and owned his own con spread of the disease. JH
Beyond safer sex, the campaign looks at
struction business. But at age 30 his world cracked.
other stigmas in the gay community: drug use,
racism and mental health issues. “As a culture
Suicidal thoughts resurfaced. He had anxi For more information about die HIV STOPS WITH
M e cam paign, visit uww.hivstopswithme.org.
and a stereotype, the gay population is very ety attacks and bouts of depression. He spent
much partying and doing meth and having sex,”
time in and out of psychiatric hospitals. His
KATHY B e lg e is a Portland free-lance writer.
marriage of 10 years ended, and Van Vleck spi
says Motter. “People don’t view it as something
ike most of the gay men he associated
with, John Motter liked to party.
Coke, alcohol, pot, ecstasy and crys
tal methamphetamine were all readi
ly available. If you had told him 10
years ago, when he was a certified public
accountant at one of the country’s most presti
gious accounting finns, that his drug use would
lead to illnesses and jail time, he never would
have believed you.
After a routine physical for insurance cover
age in 1998, Motter, now 42, tested positive for
HIV. He also found out he had hepatitis C. It
wasn’t long before he became so ill from the
hepatitis that he was forced to go on disability.
With his liver in danger, he began the pre
scribed course of treatment for the disease. Sim
ilar to chemotherapy, its effects on the body are
devastating. Motter slept 14 to 20 hours a day
and experienced extreme joint pain. He lost his
appetite, some of his hair and more than 35
pounds. Just getting out of bed to attend to the
daily tasks of living seemed impossible.
Motter began to use crystal meth to give him
enough energy just to counter the side effects of
the medicine and to attend to his life. It wasn’t
long before he was injecting meth and was
addicted to the drug. He began hanging out
with other addicts, and they started passing
fraudulent checks and money orders to pay for
their habits. Eventually Motter was arrested
with six other gay, HIV-positive men and spent
13 months in prison.
Now Motter is out of jail, off drugs and trying
to help prevent the spread of HIV. He recently
joined HIV-positive men and women from around
the country as part of a frank new media campaign
meant to slow the spread of the epidemic.
Up until now, most HIV prevention cam
paigns have targeted those who are negative.
The new campaign, “HIV Stops with Me,” is
aimed at HIV-positive people, acknowledging
the role those who are positive have in stopping
the spread of the disease.
In Oregon, four gay and bisexual men—
Motter, Jerry Walker, Jeffery Van Vleck and
Chris High— were chosen to he the face of HIV.
Other cities have spokesmodels who represent
the demographic of the epidemic in those
places.
With posters in bars, newspaper ads, postcards
and an interactive Web site, “HIV Stops with
Me” has already been launched in cities including
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