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Documentary reveals societal pressure put on gays and lesbians
of Arab and Iranian descent by N adia A li M aiwandi
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Mark (left) and Chris are two of the subjects interviewed in the documentary I E xist: Voices
from th e L esbian an d Qay M iddle E astern Community in th e U .S.
community that was part of her upbringing. Yet,
s marginalized as Middle Eastern
ers are, there are some within the
unlike Rafati, Shooshani lost no family or friends
when she came out.
community who remain nearly
invisible.
Her mother was surprised but became “much
Although Middle Eastern cul
more accepting” as time went on, Shooshani
tures are known for close family ties and strong
says. In the film, she relates a story where she
and her mother are walking near a lake, and her
relations to community, when coupled with the
mother is explaining her concern.
shame put on homosexuality, it can lead to a life
She tells Shooshani: “1 see you drowning.
of secrecy for gays and lesbians. Those who risk
coming out risk losing their family and commu
1 see you going down the wrong path.”
nity permanently.
Shooshani points to a spider sitting on the
The documentary / Exist: Voices from the
water and says, “What if to you it looked like
Lesbian and G ay Middle Eastern Community in
I was drowning, but really I was happy splashing
around and doing my own thing.7” She says from
the U.S., which will screen June 26 in Portland,
takes these unchartered issues head on.
that point on there was a shift, and her mother
Through interviews with gay and lesbian peo
realized she could actually be happy this way.
ple of Arab and Iranian descent and some of
The Bay Area resident— who will participate
in a panel discussion after the Portland screening
their relatives, the film explores sexual orienta
tion, suicidal ideation and family discord— sub
along with Rafati and another woman featured
jects not commonly discussed in public among
in the film, Parandeh Kia— doesn’t see a conflict
in being who she is.
Middle Easterners.
Out of the dozen or
R eso u rces
“A lot of people feel they
have to choose. There’s
so interviewed, Ghaza-
leh’s story is the most
• Unlearning Homophobia video series: always this sense of
alarming. Her family
www.unleaminghomophobia.com
either/or. But being Iran-
became deeply hostile
• Iranian queer site: www.homanla.org
'an> Jewish and lesbian
after learning she is a
• Muslim queer site: www.ahfatiha.net
has forced me to become
lesbian. During a con
• Goudarz Eghtedari’s site:
whole, she says.
frontation, Rafati’s eld
www.voicesofthemiddleeast.com
The films ground
breaking
subject matter
est brother tried to
impressed two Northeast Portland residents last
choke her and had to be pulled off by two other
November in Los Angeles. Goudarz Eghtedari,
brothers. Repeated threats from her family forced
an Iranian American, and Gabriele Ross, origi
her and her partner to move out of their home for
nally from Germany, were attending the First
fear of their safety. That was four years ago, and
Conference of Homosexuality in Iranian Soci
family relationships have improved little, if any.
ety, where they saw I Exist.
“To lose everyone all at once was very
Eghtedari is considered an expert on Iranian
hard,” says Rafati, who immigrated from Iran
sexual minorities and spoke at the conference.
with her family in 1983. “I didn’t have anyone
“I’ve been involved with gay and lesbian issues
on my side.”
in the Iranian American community since
Subsequently, these events prompted the
1996,” when he wrote a research paper on the
making of I Exist. After finding no reading mate
subject. Eghtedari also testified in Japan for an
rial on Middle Eastern queers to help her deal
Iranian gay man facing deportation.
with the tumultuous time, Rafati approached
In March, the domestic partners— or “joint
the filmmakers of De Colores, a documentary on
cat owners,” as Ross calls it— decided to organ
Latino gays and lesbians and part of the
ize a public showing of 1 Exist, securing grants
Unlearning Homophobia video series, to film
from Equity Foundation and A Territory
something on her community. She says they
Resource. Ross hopes the event will raise aware
agreed with enthusiasm.
ness among Middle Easterners about queer issues
Rafati, a clinical psychologist, notes that it is
and illustrate that “Middle Easterners are no dif
not simply culture that caused the hostile reaction
ferent than anyone else.” J D
from her family. “That’s too easy,” she says,
acknowledging the homophobia that permeates
I E x is t V oices from the L esbian and G ay
in many comers of Western culture. “Also, many
M iddle E astern C ommunity in th e U.S. will be
Iranians I know have had very supportive families
shown 6 p m. June 26 in Room 53 at Portland State
when they came out.”
University's Cramer Hall, 1721 S.W. Broadway.
Bita Shooshani, also featured in the film, is one
of those Iranians. Her family immigrated to the
N adia A li M aiwandi is an A fghan free-lance
States when she was 5 years old. She says she grew
up in a "small Iranian town in the San Fernando journalist and technical writer living m Portland.
She can be reached at af^anactwism @yahoo com .
Valley” of California, alluding to the tight-knit
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