nary 9.2004
4
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E d it o r :
! our story “Yoga Teacher Invites Gay-Basher
to Oregon” is incorrect [Dec. 5J. I never
invited Brian Joseph, the person who assaulted
me, to Oregon.
Mr. Joseph brutally attacked me without
provocation, yet 1 do have compassion for him.
IXiring a court-supervised meeting with him, he
expressed to me that he had a problem with
anger. 1 simply invited him to my class in South
Africa since 1 believe yoga is a safe and appro
priate way to deal with anger.
1 never approved of the media labeling him
a “gay-hasher.” 1 am concerned that if Mr.
Joseph continues to he called a gay-hasher, he
will he less able to turn his life around. The
term diminishes his efforts to reconcile for his
p<x>r behavior.
Mr. Joseph apologized to me, and 1 accepted
his apology on the condition that he plead
guilty to assault. He is now serving a six-month
suspended sentence for three years. Even
though 1 did not specifically ask him to, he also
apologized to Cape Town’s gay community. He
was remorseful and showed courage in facing
consequences.
Why must the media indulge in sensation
al language and label him a gay-hasher after
he has been brought to justice and made
amends?
Am I defending my attacker’s violent behav
ior? Certainly not. 1 am simply defending him,
as I would anyone else, against language that
diminishes rather than heals.
People can make whatever assumptions they
want, hut assumptions should never lead to hate
speech or violence. Assumptions should not
even lead to misunderstandings, hut obviously
they do.
For example, Just Out assumes that I am
“straight” and labels me “heterosexual.” This is
inappropriate.
My sexual orientation is not relevant to my
being assaulted. Mr. Joseph ’s perceptions
about my sexual orientation were completely
relevant when he asked, “You’re one o f those, '
aren’t you?” as he flapped his wrist effeminate
ly. My fellow yoga teacher, Birgit, and 1 both
found this offensive. 1 tried to diffuse the situ
ation by telling him that 1 was with my girl
friend and that we wanted some privacy.
Shortly thereafter he became violent, hitting
me five times.
I remained calm while Mr. Joseph assaulted
me— never hitting hack or insulting him. I made
every effort to bring him to justice. I was able to
see past his behavior and see the inherent gcxxl
in him. 1 forgive him without hesitation.
1 am proud of the contribution that yoga has
made in my own life and that 1 am willing to
share yoga with others, including Mr. Joseph.
Through all of this, I am adamant that Mr.
Joseph and Just Out can’t have what’s not theirs.
My private life is my private life. Please respect
that.
The injuries 1 sustained during the attack
have healed exceptionally well, and I am thor-
oughly.enjoying my holiday abroad.
Please express my best regards to my fami
ly and friends. I trust this letter will address
any confusion Just O ut’s story may have
caused.
J ames G irod
Portland
Mothers deserve
compassion
To t h e
E d it o r :
s lesbians, as grandmothers, as advocates of
the right of lesbians and gays to marry, hut
most especially as human beings and former sin
gle mothers, we are horrified by and ashamed of
Marty Davis’ callous and insensitive insult of the
single mothers of two murdered girls (“Hail
Marry!” Nov. 21).
Children don’t die because of the sexual
orientation or marital status of their parents.
These mothers loved their children. They are
not responsible for their deaths. The girls died
because one perverted man murdered them.
Lesbians and gays have not been allowed to
marry. We suffer legal and stxrial injustice. But
n o t a b le s
503 698-5429
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äaCTfflnaESan
Cheek eat the veiee pereeeal eds m page SO.
There'! waeeeae welting te ge atth fee.
Submit year mm ad et Mw.jetteet.eeai.
Marlene Daah (left) and Carol Jennings of Portland were married Nov. 28 at the Coast
Harbourside Hotel and Marina in Victoria, British Columbia. The couple (pictured here on
the deck of the ferry as they left Victoria Harbor on Nov. 30) had a civil ceremony with
friends Victoria and Anthony Hawley as their witnesses. They then spent the long holiday
weekend in Victoria sightseeing, shopping and finding good restaurants.
Jennings works in the accounting department of a D SL company in Vancouver, Wash.
Daab is unemployed.
“ We have been together over 10 years and felt that we wanted to make a public decla ation
of our commitment,” the couple told Ju st Out. “ The good people of Canada have granted us
legal status, and because everyone deserves recognition and validation of their relationships, we
decided to take the plunge. Everyone there seemed sincerely happy for us and could not have
been more supportive. Too bad we had to go to a country other than our own for that
acknowledgment!”