Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013, September 19, 2003, Page 35, Image 35

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    1A2Û Û 3
ADVICE
and supporters Monthly social ratgxxjs and cultural
SPIRI I L AM I V
events
(David or Laney 503226 7079. ext 147(7/03)
Metro: Spirituality
Koinonia Cathode Com m unity is a progressive
Ainsworth United Church of Christ is a multi
racial, multicultural, open and affirm ing church Sunday
Eucharist at Bridgeport United Church of Christ A wef
com ing congregatxxi. Gathokc m tradton and Ecumeracal
w orship is at 10 am. church sch o o l for children runs
*i m em bershp
sm al farth community that gathers «*e k)y to celebrate
(2941 NE Ainsworth St 503284-8767
aucc9teleport com 7 (7/04)
concurrently
Ana «rim Community of gay m en m eets w eekly for
(7 30 pm Thursday
5032810722) (7/03)
C hnstian m editation and prayer
Atkinson Memorial Church i$ a Umtanan Urw ersakst
m ilcom ng congregation n Oregon City (710 Sixth St
503-656-7296 www atknsonchurch com) (7/03)
(6 pm Sunday 621 NE 76th Ave
503-699-0473 www komonacommunty org ) (7/03)
Lesbian Christian Fellowship m eets for study
and social outings Com m itted C h n stian s and s t i
u n su re s w elcom e
(Barbara 503 760-5791 7(7/04)
Longview United Methodist Church is w elcom ­
ing and reconokng (10 am Sunday 2851 30th Ave
360-425-4927 7(7/03)
Bridgeport United Church of Christ i$ a com m u­
Metanoia Peace Community United
Methodist Church is a "h o u se church" that bnngs
nity of progressive, political people exploring and cele
gay and straight together D aily m om mg prayer and
bratmg the Chnstian faith W e are sexual m inority and
Su n day evening w orship
straight, multicuttural and multiracial, and our children
www
(1030 am Sunday 621 NE 76th
Ave 503 258-0992 www bndgeportuccorg ) (7/03)
are valued m em bers
The City Church Portland's "o ld e st gay affirm ing
lex
tod ay's diverse generations (10 am Sunday commu
non and worship service. 6 30 pm Sunday worship
service. 7 pm W ednesday Bible study 3830 SE 62nd
Ave 503 775 5024 )0/03)
C hnstian church." offers a spm t-driven church
Congregation Neveh Shalom an open and pro
g re ssive C onservative Jew ish synagogue, extends a
warm w elcom e to all sexual rm nonties Shabbat setv
ice s 8 15 pm Friday and 9 am Saturday
(2900 S W
Peaceful Lane 503 246 8831.) (7/03)
Congregation P'nai O r (Face s of Light) Is a
vibrant, egalitarian. Je w ish Renew al congregation m
Portland M e e ts several tim es a m onth m various loca
(PO Box 42187. Portland. OR 97242-0187
503-248 4500 www pnatorpdxorg) (7/03)
tw ns
(503281 3697
tearsoup com/metanoia 7 (7/04)
Metropolitan Community Church of Portland
h olds ecum enical Su n day m orning w o rsh p se rvice s at
9 and 11 am Su n d ay school for children is held during
(2400 NE Broadway
503 2818868 mfoOmccportland com 7(7/03)
the 11 am w orship service
The
Nichiren Buddhist Tam pie of Portland
offers several w eekly gathenngs Everyone w elcom e'
(10 am Sunday. 7 30 am Tuesday and Thursday
7 30 pm Wednesday meditation 2025 SE Yamhill St
503-232-8064 www mchiren-shu org/portland 7 (7/04)
Peace Church of the Brethren is a w elcom ing
congregation ( II am Sunday 12727 SE Market St
503 254 6380 7(7/04)
Portland Canter for Spiritual Growth is a New
Thought, uplifting, refreshing and exciting place of wor
slxp. Becom e a m inister n our mmistenal program
(10 am Sunday Cal for location 503-7770727.)(7/OS)
Portland Church of Religious Science is a lib­
Dignity Portland m eets for M a s s on Su n d a ys
(503-262-6947.) (7/03)
eral. open, pro gre ssive N ew Thought com m unity w el­
Eartrose Fellowship Unitarian Univerealist a
your thinking, change your kfe1 (10 am Sunday
w elcom ing congregation, offers Su n d ay service and
(10 30 am Sunday
1133 NE 181st A ve. Gresham 503665 2628
eastroseQteleport com www eastrose org 7 (7/04)
children s religious education
com ing everyone to discover the spm t within C hange
medita
txxi. 10. 30 am service and /umor church. 630 pm
Wednesday prayer circle 3983 NE 112th Ave
503 261 0677X7/03)
Portland Radical Faerie« meet twice a month
St. Stephen's Episcopal Church has been wei
com ing all people since 1863 (12:10pm Wednesday
and 7 45 and 10 am Sunday Sunday sch o o l and child
care at 10 am Southwest 13th Avenue at Clay Street
5032238424) (7/03)
Trinity United Methodist Church is an open
Chnstian com m unity where faith and We m tersect A l
minted' (1 0 30
am Sunday 3915 SE Steele St The
Rev Wendy Joy Woodworth 503 777 3901 7(7/03)
Waverty Heights U CC is open and affirming with
(10 am
Sunday 3300 SE Woodward St 503 238 1337
www wavertyucc org 7(7/04)
Wy'east Unitarian Unhrersalist Congregation
is an open and liberal religious com m unity offering
ntergenerational services and religious education for
children It w elcom es gay. lesbian, bi and trans mem
bers Nurtures spiritual growth and prom otes Irving by
(4 pm Sunday
3915 SE Steele St 503 777-3704
www wyeast pnwduua org.) (7/03)
Unitarian Unrversakst principles
Zion United Church of Christ an open and
affirming congregatxxi. is open to gay. lesbian, bi.
trans and heterosexual people w ho w ish to w o rsh p m
a C h n st centered, warm, canng. multiage/race/cultural
( II am Sunday 2025 NE 23rd Ave.,
Gresham 503 665 8741 7(7/03)
faith com m unity
Washington: Spirituality
Abundant Life Center is A N ew Thought
Com m unity for spiritual awakening and transformmg
kves through love A safe place where children team to
(10 am Sunday 10006 NE
Ninth Ave. Vancouver 360573 2626) (7103)
em body spmtual prm cples
East Vancouver United Methodist Church is
(10 am Sunday
5701 MacArthur Blvd 360 693 4761
ourclarkcounty Columbian com/273/) (7/03)
reconciling and w elcom ing
First Congregational Church United C hurch of
Chnst, holds services m an open and affirming congre
(10.00 am Sunday worship. 1l:l5amadult
education 1220 NE 68th St . Vancouver
360693 1476 vanuccOaolcom 7(7/04)
gatxxi
with potlucks and circles at the full m oon and the new
God's Holy Territory is a ch a n sm a tc joy Wled
com m unity of C h n stian s m Troutdale that values and
m oon O pen to all men seeking alternative spmtual
w orship experience in Vancouver where everyone is
encourages all people m finding a place of belonging in
grow th and com m unity C offee hours start 9 30 am
the family of G o d Su n d ay w o rsh p at 10:15 am. Adult
Satu rdays at 3 Fnends Coffeehouse. 201 S E 12th
Education at 9 am; children and youth at 10 3 0 am
A ve
( II am
Sunday service Bible study 7 pm Thursdays, except
third Thursday 1500 NE 49th St 360885 9461
pastorQgodshotytemtory com) (7/04)
(27400 SE Stark St.
503-661-4520) (7/03)
(503 235 0826 otterQpcer com ) (7/04)
Seventh-Day Adventist Kinship is a support
organization for L G B T people, their fam ilies and
First Unitarian Church of Portland is an open and
affirm ing liberal religious com m unity offering a wide
range of program s to nurture spm tual growth, com m u­
nity and social |ustice Su n day service 9 and 11 am
(1011 S W 12th Ave 503 2286389
www hrstuntananportland org.) (7/03)
(PO Box 7320. Laguna Niguel. CA 92607
7320 866 732 5677 officeQsdakinship org
www sdakmship org 7(7/04)
fnends
SisterSpirit offers w om en s spintuality celebrations,
d iscu ssio n groups, a drum m ing circle, w orkshops and
First United Methodist Church of Portland, a
w elcom ing and reconciling congregation, believes no
one is left out in G o d 's family Sexual m m onty potlucks
held m onthly (1030 am Sunday 1838 SW Jefferson
St 503 2283195 www fumepdx org 7(7/03)
c la sse s Schedule of events available All w om en are
w elcom e (Suite 102. 3430 SE Belmont St Mailing
address PO Box 9246. Portland. OR 97207
503-736 3297 sisterspQteleport com ) (7/04)
M e e ts every third Thursday m the S t Andrew Nativity
Sch o o l
(7 30 pm Fnday Paulist Center.
2408 SE 16th Ave 503 231 4955 7 (7/03)
lowed by a social
(7 pm 806 NE Alberta St
IbtspintcirdeOyahoocom) (7/03)
Southm inster Presbyterian Church is a chal
Gay Men's Labyrinth Project m eets quarterly for a
lengmg, supportive com m unity that w elcom es all peo­
walking m ediation and wisdom ard e on the labyrinth
ple
(Dale 503 2332026. ext 3 wwwgaylabymth org) (7/04)
O regon Su n day school and nursery care
Integrity is a group of sexual m inonty Episcopalians
and friends Various locations throughout O regon.
(Bruce Mason 503 2869111 brucepdxortìattbi com
www mtegntyusa org.) (7/03)
Interfaith Spiritual Canter h o u se s spm tual direc­
tors from various w orld religious traditions, w ho are
(Second
Floor. 3910 SE 11th Ave 503233 2026 ext 3
www mterfaithspintualceoter com ) (7/03)
available for guidance, c la sse s and retreats
Keshet Portland is a group for Jew ish members of the
sexual rmnonties community and their partners, spouses
It is the first M o re Light Presbyterian C hurch m
(10 am
Sunday 12250 SW Denney Road. Beaverton
503-644 2073 staffQsouthmm com ) (7/03)
St. Andrew Catholic Church m vites all to )om a
diverse faith com m unity for prayer and fellow ship
(9 30 am Sunday 806 NE Alberta St 503 2814429 )
(7/03)
St. James Lutheran Church a Reconciled m
C h n st congregation, w elcom es all people for tradition
al. liturgical w orship w here w e experience G o d 's rec­
onciling love that se ts all people free (9 and 11 am
Sunday 1315 S W Park Ave 503 227 2439 7 (7/03)
Sexual Minority Youth Resource Center. •
program of C a sc a d e Behavioral HealthCare. offers
Y O U T H
Michael Servetus Unitarian Unhrersalist
Fellowship a W elcom ing Congregatxxi. provides a
hom e for the liberal religious spmt (9 15 and 11 am
Sunday 4505 E 18th S t . Vancouver 360695 1891.)
(7/03)
Willamette Valley: Spirituality
First Congregational Church United C hurch of
C h n st is an open and affirming congregation offering
w orship and church school Child care provided and
(9 am Sunday learning hour.
10 am worship 700 Manon St. NE. Salem
503 363 3660X7/03)
w heelchair accessible
Morning side United Methodist Church is a
reconciling congregatxxi where everyone is w elcom e
to participate m the full kfe of the congregatxxi
(8 30
and 11 am Sunday 3674 12th St SE. Salem
503 364 5013 7(7/03)
Sacred Souls honors al sacred paths, promotes peace
and strives to create an environment that stpports and
promotes nterfarth dalogue M eets at the Oregon School
(6 308 pm Sunday 440 Ferry Si SE.
Salem wbohlthOaol com www sacredsouls org I (7/03)
of M assage
(541889-3119 or 866-248 8369 eoc49eocil.org.
wwweoO.org.) (7/04)
support and recreation to gay. lesbian, bi and trans
Metro: Youth
Flavor«, a social support group for sexual minority
and younger O ffe rs drop-m com puter
access, pool tables and an inform al place to hang out.
youth of color 21 and younger, m eets on w eekends for
W e e kly support m eetings includes Trans Youth G roup
food and sociakang Regular events and activities
(4-8 pm
Monday and Wednesday. 4 pm-midmght Friday and
Saturday. 2100 SE Belmont Si. 5 0 3 -67 2-9664 TTY
503-231 9286 www smyre org ) O ther program s
include Clackam as County Sexual Minority
Youth Connection (C O SM Y C J provides oppor­
youth 23
Flavors is a protect of Love M ake s a F a n cy's MultiQueer
(Jaye
503-228-3892 or ¡aye&mfamlyorg.) (7/04)
Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education
Network (GLSEN) fights to end anti gey bias xi K -12
sch o o ls (12700 SW North Dakota S t . Suite 180.
>129. Tigard OR 97223 503-525-1177.
glaenOglsenocegon org www glaenoregon org ) (7/04)
The
M uhiQ uaar a program of Lo ve M a k e s a Family,
and the creative group Personal D eity Proxy
social activities O ffe rs one-on-one support, referrals
and Inform ation on H IV and S T D prevention and
re so u rce s for adults w ho w ork with L G B T Q youth
reso u rce s and support m the com m unity and the
and questioning youth to plan and attend m onthly
sch o o l system s, with a focus on support for L G B T Q
social events. A lso inform ation, referral and advocacy
(Jaye 503-228-3892 or
¡aye&mfamly org) (7/04)
se rvice s m W ash in gton C o u n ty
(5 03
(Mo>y 503-2605792
mokyQpndeprofect org) (7/04)
Outside In operates a dime for anyone who can't qualify
for the Oregon health Plan a s well a s needle exchange
services that include those who inject horm ones Can
provide transitional housing for youth 20 and younger as
weS as for those H IV+ and younger than 23. N eeds volun­
(10 am-6 pm Monday-Frtday. 1132 SW
13th Ave 503-535-3800 www outstdem o rg ) (7/04)
Triple Point offers education, support and advocacy
to gay. lesbian, tx. trans and questioning youth m
Vancouver. W ash M e e ts 6-8 pm Tuesdays m the
basem ent o f Youth H ouse. 1112 Colum bia S t m
Vancouver
(John 360895-1325)0/03)
younger to get together for free, fun and supportive
9690060 cosmycyouthOyaboo com ) Pride
Project b n n gs together W ashington C o u n ty queer
youth of color
Washington: Youth
tunities for queer and questioning youth a g e s 23 and
provides advocacy to sexual m inority youth O ffers
teers of at ages.
Metropolitan Community Church of the
Gentie Shepherd m Vancouver w elcom es you
(10 30 am arid 630 pm Sunday worship. 9 am Sunday
Bible study 2200 Broadway The Rev Harriet
Barshofsky 360 695 1480X7/03)
Spirit Circle is for lesbian, b or trans w om en seek
N en Catholic C hurch celebrates an affirm ing M a ss fol­
program and is supported by Brother to Brother.
w elcom e gay. lesbian, bi. trans and straight
m g a w elcom ing com m unity m the Cathokc church
Gay and Lesbian Outreach (G A LO ) of S t Philip
Eastern Oregon: Youth
Eastern Oregon Center for independent
Living offers support and advocacy to gay. lesbian,
bi. trans and questioning youth in Eastern O regon.
M y boys ape special
How to tell if you’re e. fag hag
(or Just a fag friend)
w orsNp. children s school and ch4d care.
Faith United Methodist Church is a w elcom ing
W ednesday Prayers 6 -6 30 pm
............... ¥ ................
Willamette Valley: Youth
Gay, Lssbian, BI, Transgandar and
Questioning Youth Group for ages 13 to 18
Offers support, rform etxxi and fun in Eugene Free,
(Drop m 4 8 pm Friday.
Amazon Community Center 2700 HUyard St.
541-684-3466X7/03)
confidential. aduft-faciklated
Lesbian, Gay, Biaaxual, Transgandar Youth
Group for a g e s 25 and younger m eets every M onday
in Eugene (5 pm Komorm Center. 1414 Kxicard S t
541-3461134X7/03)
Rainbow Youth of Salem for kids 21 and younger
m eets twice w eekly (68 pm Tueaday, 4 6 pm
Thursday 600 State St Deni 503-930- 7280X7/03)
D ear M s . B e h a v io r :
Right now it’s hard
to imagine how you
Call me what you
plan to “have kids
want. I’m a 23-year-
and maybe get mar­
old straight female,
ried” if you sti dislike
and almost all o f my
hanging out with
friends are gay hoys.
straight men, hut Ms.
I hear other gay
Behavior hopes you’ll
guys refer to their
figure out a way to
female friends as “fag
have everything you
hags," hut I don’t
need, including sex
think I’m one. I
and romantic love.
think the friendships
I have with my hoys
D ea r M s . B e h a v io r .-
are special, and I
Very recently my
don’t like when peo­
partner o f five years
ple call me a hag.
It’s not that I don’t like straight ■ passed away. He was ill and in the
hospital for two months prior to his
boys, it’s just that I like gay hoys
death. W e were very much in love,
better. Some o f my friends say I
and I will always love him.
should stop spending so much time
However, what is an appropriate
with gay guys and find a boyfriend. I
period o f mourning these days?
don’t think I even want a relation­
I know it used to be one year, hut
ship. I have so much fun with my
1 don’t think my former partner
friends, why do I need a boyfriend?
would want me to squander my
I want to have kids and maybe
remaining days in such a manner.
get married, hut why should I stop
I can fill my time with work and
hanging out with my gay boys in
friends; however, that isn’t usually
order to spend time with straight
enough for me.
boys who annoy me? Am l really
Should I begin to date again, or
a hag?
should I wait until I feel that I don’t
— Princess PFLAG
have to bring up the past in conver­
sation with new people?
D ear P r in c ess PFLAG:
“Fag hag” was a term undoubted­
-i
ly invented by mean queens with
D ear J:
disdain for women, not the appar­
It’s likely you’ll he ready to date
ently sweet, carefree gay boys with
in stages. You may he ready for sex
whom you might he sharing fashion
before you’d consider getting
and makeup tips.
emotionally involved. Or coffee
W h o could blame you for liking
and talking might feel like enough
gay hoys better than straight ones?
right now.
When more straight men learn to
You’ll know when it feels right to
dance or can address your em otion­
bring up the past and when it doesn’t.
al pain with more than just a grunt,
Unfortunately, many
maybe you’ll become
o f your dates will he
more open-minded.
able to relate to the
Straight women
experience o f losing
who surround them­
a partner.
selves with fags only
So, if you feel
seem pathetic when
ready to date, go for
it becomes a lifetime
it. Constructing a
affliction that ulti­
timeline— e.g.,
mately interferes
waiting a year or
with their own hap­
more based on what
piness. You’ll only
seems appropri­
qualify for that
ate”— would just feel
extreme category if
artificial and might
you spend the next
deprive you o f stime
two decades the same
much-needed happi­
way, traveling from
ness. You may feel
party to party with
your “hoys,” never
grief about the loss
o f your partner for a
finding any sexually
long time, hut it
intimate relation­
doesn’t
mean you
ships for yourself.
need to he alone, if that’s not how
That’s the part that clearly concerns
you prefer to mourn. j n
the people who want you to find a
boyfriend.
© Meryl Cohn 2003
Do straight men annoy you so
much that you don’t want them
even for sex ? Or do you have some
M eryl C o h n is the author of Do
What I Say: Ms. Behavior’s Guide
other resistance to intimacy in gen­
eral? If it’s that you’re secretly a les­
to Gay and Lesbian Etiquette
bian or hi-curious, or have other
(Houghton Mifflin). Signed copies arc
available directly from the author. Send
sexual feelings you don’t find tolera­
ble, Ms. Behavior promises to
questions or correspondence to
msbehavior<Q)aol. com.
accept you just as you are.
I t ’s n ot that
I don’t like
straight boys,
it’s Just that
I like ga y
boys better....
I have
so m uch fun
with m y friends,
w h y do
I need a
boyfriend?