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Chez W hat? brings kink to the Alberta neighborhood
by Peter Zuckerman
Shawna Holder 503/408-7779
pgr 503/301-7777
10140 SE Pine, Ste. B
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Keri Salim, patron saint to the tattooed and pierced
it’s like to be young,” Salim says. “One of them
alloween spiders and skulls drip
off the ceiling and swing from once told me they found this place inspiring.”
The elderly woman keeps chuckling as she
side to side. Porcelain poodles
line the walls. Plastic centipedes talks to the waiter. It seems like the customers
crawl up the display case and really get to know who serves them here.
The bal
joint’s quirkiness extends beyond the
toward the tables. A stack of board games
ances on top of a cabinet. Mellow music beats in dining room. Entering the bathroom is like
sneaking inside some modem sculpture, with
the background.
glitter sparkling off the boldly painted walls
W hat is this place?
“It’s like a coral reef,” waitress Holly Morgan and ceiling.
Employees share this zest for Chez What?
says. "New layers get deposited every few
months. People are like, ‘I don’t want to keep and, like the customers, often return there. They
this and I don’t want to get rid of it— let’s give it appreciate how Salim becomes friends with her
staff and zooms off to concerts with them.
to Chez What?!” ’
“Once you start working for Chez What? you
Owner Keri Salim has a different interpreta
tion. “It’s like we’re running a welfare program always come back,” Morgan explains. “It’s a sup
portive environment, especially if you want to
for the tattooed and pierced.”
Words escape Salim— who just so happens to pursue a creative effort.”
The idea for Chez What? began when Salim
have a tattoo of a tarantula scuttling up her leg
and a double piercing slicing through her eye was 16 and working for a “feminine-lesbian-veg
etarian cafe.” She vowed that she would open
brow. She throws her hands up into the air.
“Don’t ask me how to describe it," she says. her own restaurant someday. “Cooking was the
"I’m just the owner. Ask Holly— she works here.” only thing I did well,” she explains.
After cooking school and a stint at the Mar
Morgan tosses her pink hair and pauses.
riott,
Salim opened Chez What? seven years
Then she looks pleased. Has she finally figured
ago. “Business has always gone well,” she says.
out how to describe this place?
“It’s a family,” Morgan says. “A stone soup of “We’re not always making money, hut we’re
always having a lot of fun. Customers get
the neighborhood, a big old hodgepodge.”
involved with it. It’s always been like a commu
A quick scan of the menu reveals an eclectic
array of selections, from the “California Hang nity center.”
Chez What? moved to its present location in
over” to the “Orteaze Narly Burger” to old-fash
ioned pancakes. Chez What? serves lunch, din the Alberta neighborhood three years ago and
plans to expand with a lounge featuring a full-serv
ner, Sunday brunch and cocktails.
ice bar that opens its doors in August. The space
However, customers quickly learn this is no
ordinary diner. Down-to-earth servers don’t hes will include karaoke, pinball machines, a movie
night and a queer night at least every month.
itate to plop themselves down at tables while
W hen asked about her favorite aspect of
taking food orders, making the interaction seem
working at Chez What?, Salim proudly tells the
more like a polite conversation.
One waiter wears a tank top that reads “1 eat story of how she used to keep a shrine to Tully
Bevilaqua at the restaurant. One day, the Port
cock” and shows a picture of a rooster. He has
land Fire basketball player walked in.
two button earrings. Tattoos dot his arms, and he
“I got to meet her!” Salim exclaims. “I even
looks like he might play drums in a punk hand.
Another waiter has dreadlocks that stream got to cook her food!” j[7]
past his shoulders. He sits down at an elderly
woman’s table and starts up a chat session. In CHEZ W h a t ? is located at 2203 N.E. Alberta St.
The telephone number is 503-281-1717.
addition to the punks, queers, neighbors, black
families, baby dykes and trans patrons, Chez
P eter Z u c k e r m a n is a student at Reed College
What? also seems to appeal to an older clientele.
and
an intern at Just Out.
"Older customers say it reminds them what
H
always looking for one more satisfied customer.
R B
503/287.9370
PA B A
íd c e t o W
M
i
K K A I. I Y
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