tehmary 18, MOI DIVERSIONS Twist my arm S pike and M ike’s Sick and Twisted Festival of Animation has returned to Portland. Their track record speaks for itself: These are the guys who helped popularize Beavis and Butt'head, South Park and Rugrats. Am ong their latest feature-length collection of bizarre, shocking and disturbingly grotesque shorts is one of the favorites from last year’s queer film festival, “Rick and Steve: The Happiest Gay Couple in All the World.” Director Allan Brocka used stop-motion photography to create this hilarious gem, except his medium is not clay but Legos. Other highlights include “Angry Kid,” the latest from Aardman Animation (Wallace and Gromit, Chicken Run), and “Rejected” by cult animator Don Hertzfeldt (“Billy’s Balloon,” “A h L’Amour"). Remember, these films are described as rude, crude and totally lewd, so the politically correct can stay home and watch Providence. You’ve been warned. T he festival runs daily through Feb. 25 and weekends only through March 24 at C in e­ ma showtimes. 21, 616 N.W. 21st Ave. C all 503-223-4515 for —Jim Radosta Punchin’ Judy Run around, get paid | udy Davis comes out swinging with both ! o experience necessary. Northwest Women’s Lacrosse is looking for a few good umpires. If | arms in a tour de force performance during the A B C miniseries Me and M y Shadows: I you enjoy the great outdoors, running around and whistling into the wind, then this is Life with Judy Garland, which airs 9 p.m. Feb. 25 for you. Here’s a chance to run off those extra and 26. Both Davis and Tammy Blanchard, winter pounds and get paid in the process. who portrays Garland from ages 13 to 22, attack the role like bantam boxers: dodging, weaving, Umpires will officiate high school, club and col­ lege games. The first clinic for new and used jabbing and eventually delivering a knockout umpires will be held from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. blow that leaves you wondering how the bat­ tered belter ever lasted so many rounds. Feb. 24. You will get to learn the ins and outs of The number o f gay men who identify with women’s lacrosse presented by nationally rated G arlands one-two punch o f tragic vulnerability umpire Dorothy Hirsch. The clinic fee is $15 pre­ followed by soaring triumph dwindles with each registered or $25 at the door. All are welcome, and although this isn’t specifically a lesbian passing year, and for that reason alone this film group, it is very dyke-friendly, if you get the drift. needed to be made and deserves to be seen. For more information including directions to the Based on the memoir by her daughter Lom a clinic, how to get your hands on a rule book, Luft, the film attempts to paint a complete por­ other fees and fashion tips, call 503-256-6206 or trait o f the woman as well as the performer. T he e-mail moca@teleport.com. — Lynn Thomas almost unbearably painful dramatic scenes of nervous breakdowns, drug addiction and bank­ ruptcies are balanced with painstakingly re-cre­ ated musical sequences that are surprisingly effective in capturing G arlan ds theatrical magic. The film touches on the bisexuality o f her father and two o f her husbands, but with the ex­ he trailer hadn’t looked ception o f one shot o f a queer applauding wildly overly promising, so as I set­ in the front row, Me and My Shadows doesn’t tled in for the screening of Saving Silverman, I wasn’t explore the intense devotion she inspired in expecting much. After all, a several generations o f gay men. According to movie about two idiots a recent article in Atlantic Monthly, Judy (chubby Jack Black and Worship is something o f an embarrassment weasely Steve Zahn) trying for liberated gays today, and Garland is an to stop their best friend icon many would like to put behind us (Jason Biggs) from marrying like Liberace or Truman Capote. But her an iiberbitch (Am anda persona as the misunderstood outsider strug­ Peet) so they can keep gling for acceptance still resonates with their N eil Diamond trib­ queers who understand that, despite the ad­ ute band going.. .well, vances our people have made, we still aren’t Ja c k B lack let’s just say it lived up to my over the rainbow yet. — Marc Acito saves Silverm an Save this for the cheap seats T expectations. But then, about halfway through, the film takes a turn toward our side of the fence when Black comes to grips with being gay! Throughout the rest of the movie, he blithely proclaims his homosexuality to anyone who will listen. Mostly, the revelation doesn’t lead to much consternation among the hetero characters, except for the real N eil Diamond, who has been receiving nude pictures o f Black for years. How refreshing to find a dunderheaded, slacker, dopey movie that isn’t using hom o­ sexuality as something to be frightened by or shunned. A nd just when you think the developm ent o f the gay character isn’t going to pffcgress further, a fourth-quarter surprise results in a man-to-man wedding ceremony and foll-on kiss. It isn’t great cine­ ma, but it might make a fun cheap-movie- night excursion. — Andy Mangels Now straight is Straight? H « 3 7 37th Ave. Tickets are $18 at the door or $15 in advance from Gai-Pied, In Other Words or Fastixx. Fire your questions off to 503-203-3305. Get a jump on this C alling all dance mavens: White Bird presents one of the world’s greatest modem dance companies, Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater, performing two different programs Feb. 27 and 28 at the Schnitz. It’s been sue years since the company came to town, so don’t miss this group of 30 amazing dancers. Perform­ ances begin 7:30 p.m. at 1037 S.W. Broad­ way. Tickets are $17.50-$65 from 503-224-8499, Fastixx or www.whitebird.org. Jump start yourself t’s alm ost spring, it’s tim e to wake up your libido! O n M arch 1 and 2, It’s M y Pleasure is bringing in nationally know n sex educator Merryl S lo a n to pre­ sent a w orkshop called “G reat S e x , Secret Desires: S ix S tep s to the G reatest S e x You Ever Im agined.” S h e instructs the adventurous and the curious in a lot of things you alw ays w anted to know but were afraid to ask. C la ss starts 7 p.m . at 3 1 0 6 N .E . 6 4 th A ve. T uition is $25. C a ll 503-280-8080 to preregister. Let’s get classical T hose versatile guys o f the Portland Gay Men’s Chorus reformat themselves into the subgroups Cascade and eXpress! for the third annual Classical Matinee at the Old 0 Church, 1422 S.W. 11th Ave. If the music of Grieg, Cherubini, Britten and other serious composers rings your chimes, then be there at 2 p.m. Feb. 25 for an intimate afternoon of music. The concert also will feature flutist Mary M cCar­ ty. Tickets are $15 from chorus members, Fastixx or 503-224-8499. Join them afterward at a recep­ tion and enjoy wine and cheese. Eat up these words owie Baggadonutz continues to bring ttention voracious readers— and eaters: In provocative gay shows O ther Words, Portland’s only nonprofit to Portland, and his pre­ feminist bookstore, is celebrating its eighth anniversary with a fund-raiser Feb. 22, A Liter­ sentation Feb. 24 at the ary Feast: W omen o f the Americas. Show up at Echo Theatre is no exception. Seattle’s David Norse Hall, and you’ll be treated to a three- Schmader comes to town with his solo comedy course meal with Latin Am erican flavor as well Straight. He went undercover at “ex-gay" groups to as readings o f w om en’s writing. T h e cuisine will inform the writing of this piece. be provided by Flaming Carrot Catering. Tick­ But concurrently, he casts a criti­ ets arc $50, and you must R SV P by Feb. 18 to cal eye on the gay community, 503-232-6003. T h e festivities begin 6:30 p.m. whose limitations he also exposes. hat a nice surprise to check in on one o f the m ost literate talk shows on the tube, Candice Bergen’s Exhale on With wit and iasight, Schmader at 111 N .E. 11th Ave. the O xygen network, and h e » her introduce “my new favorite band, Pink M artini.” T his was a real coup, as faces the tough questions as he they were, I believe, the first m usical group to perform on the program, now in its second season. Bergen gets gets to the bottom of what it Compiled by to make use o f her Ivy League education and inquisitive mind with guests you’ll rarely see on other shows (except means to be straight. Or not. The ORIANA perhaps Charlie Rose). Sh e’s not afraid o f the “F word (fem inist) and clearly has not wasted her post-Murpfry Brown show starts 8 p.m. at 1515 S.E. G reen years in idle pursuits; die exhibits a keen mind overflowing with the wisdom o f a mature woman. Her fondness for Portland’s own most urbane band undoubtedly stem s in part from the French connection. A s die widow o f director Louis M alle and the mother o f a daughter who is half-French, the esprit o f the tide cut from Pink M artini’s C D Sympathique clearly hit home. Bergen chatted up maestro Thom as Lauderdale and revealed she— or her produc­ hat is Unofficial Queer Night, Alex? On er—had done her homework when d ie asked him if he hadn’t a recent edition of Celebrity Jeopardy, once »p ire d to put fas Ivy League education to use as mayor o f Jodie Foster trounced Nathan Lane and Portland. Lauderdale replied, ”1 1 1 » was my plan.” W hen Harry Connick Jr. to win $21,600 for the Hol­ Bergen suggested it wasn’t too late, d ie band erupted in laughter as lywood Literacy Project. Lane, who fought a Lauderdale explained, “1 think I’ve had too many scandalous incidents in my good fight, won $10,000 for Broadway p u t to really effectively be mayor o f Portland.” T he band then played Bergen’s fave song Cares/Equity Fights AIDS. with a flourish, and d ie thanked them afterward by displaying her fluent French. A fondness j[7J Hollywood tidbits for $1,000 Í W