novemùer 2,2ÛOO
n T T U n W T T T n e w s
LIVE IN T H E H E A R T
OF TH E C IT Y . . .
PFLAG D ay
AND NEVER
M IS S A BEAT.
Members from across the country come together for annual meeting
by Jon ath an Kipp
“PFLAG really gives you the
bout 100 people
opportunity
to change the world,”
gathered
at
the
explained Drake, who even has
Hotel Vintage Plaza
reached out to his conservative col
to meet and greet
leagues along the way. “They’ve
celebrity mom Betty
been amazingly supportive, amaz
DeGeneres as part of the Parents,
ingly receptive.”
Families and Friends of Lesbians and
Gays annual meeting Oct. 28. The
Drake hopes his two-year term
Portland Gay Men’s Chorus provid
as president will result in even more
ed entertainment during the recep
gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgen-
tion, a fund-raiser for the national
dered kids who feel safe in school
organization.
and more people who can live
openly without fear of violence and
D eG eneres, the m other o f
without fear of losing their jobs.
television star Ellen DeGeneres,
“Then we will have been a part of
signed copies of her second book,
that,” he said.
Just a Mom. She is a member of
“Parents have to go at their
PFLA G and in 1997 became the
own speed,” said Drake, whose
first heterosexual person to serve
as n ational spokeswom an for
son helped him realize that.
“ Most parents are at PFLAG
Com ing Out Day.
because their children have sent
DeGeneres told the crowd she
them.”
also is the programs oldest spokes
Only 10 percent of all parents
woman. In addition to her speaking
of gay children have attended a
engagements, she writes a weekly
PFLAG meeting, according to
advice column for PlanetOut.com.
Drake.
He said sending parents
“I call myself a late-blooming
literature and keeping the lines of
activist,” DeGeneres told the crowd.
communication open will help
“Because I’m Ellens mom, I get this
them find their way to the sup
platform in which to speak. I feel like
portive group and achieve a bet
I’m speaking for all of you. It’s a labor
ter understanding of their chil
of love.”
dren’s lives.
A Portland journalist once asked
It is not uncommon for parents
DeGeneres if she was using her
to take five years or more before
daughter’s celebrity. “Absolutely!”
accepting their child’s sexual ori
she recalled saying, to the group’s
entation. But the average PFLAG
delight.
member transforms within two
Susan Carmel, co-founder of
years from hearing what seems
the first Gay Lesbian PTA in Seat Betty DeGeneres signs copies of her second book, Just a Mom,
during P FLA G ’s annual meeting Oct. 28 at the Hotel Vintage Plaza
like crushing and shocking news
tle, also addressed the group. “I
to
becoming
what Drake considers activists.
think you Oregon folks might be interested in state’s first chapter. Tennessee now has seven
The first step.7 Drake suggested children ask
PFLAG chapters.
something like this,” she said.
their parents the question, “Would you like me
Drake said he was a “Goldwater conservative
Dr. Arnold Drake was elected as the new
national president of PFLAG during the meet Republican homophobe” when he learned he to send you some PFLAG information.7” j n
ing. He and his wife became members of the had a gay son. After a year of mourning, he
For more information on PARENTS, FAMILIES
organization a year after their son told them he eventually read the book Parents of the Homo
a n d F r ie n d s o f L e s b i a n s a n d G a y s call
sexual, which served a turning point in his life.
was gay in 1986.
Drake then attended his first PFLAG confer 503'232'7676 or visit the Internet site
The Drakes later moved from Washington,
wvwu.pflag.org.
D.C., to Memphis, Tenn., and started the ence. “I thought I’d come home,” he said.
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Hollyw ood's best-known mom finds her calling in life
Jonathan Kipp: Whht can parents do to
help their gay kids?
Betty DeGeneres: If they’re already in
PFLAG, they’re already making it easier. That’s
where all people should he— helping to educate
and enlighten so their life will he easier.
JK : What was it like being thrust into the
spotlight when Ellen came out?
BD : It seemed like the right thing to do. It
wasn’t scary. It seems like it was my calling in life.
JK : How was writing your two books?
BD : It was wonderful. I kept a journal for
years. So much was that. And letters between
Ellen and me— a lot of it was just there.
JK : If being in the media spodight wasn’t a
challenge to you, coming out yourself as a
mother of a lesbian daughter wasn’t a challenge
and writing two books wasn’t a challenge, what
has been a challenge for Betty DeGeneres?
BD: Writing fiction is a challenge. And my
column on PlanetOut is a challenge.
JK : Ellen and Anne Heche were here last
summer right up the street. Was everything
fine then, or did everything just look fine dur
ing their visit to Portland? Were there clues of
what was coming?
B D : N o clues. Out of the blue. It was a
hard time.
JK : Have you talked to Anne since then?
BD : Briefly, hut not lately. Ellen and I have
always been supportive of each other. That’s
what we are doing now.
JK : What’s Ellen up to anyway?
BD : Another TV show. They’re still formu
lating the concept. Ellen says it will he out by
the time she’s 60.
JK : Is there a negative side of being famous
for Ellen?
BD: Oh sure. Always in the spotlight, very
little privacy, gossip.
JK : Is your daughter thick-skinned, or do
the media and the gossip get to her?
BD: No, she does not have a thick skin, so
that is hard.
JK : What about you? Do you get recog
nized across the country?
BD : Sometimes, not very often.
JK : Really?
BD : I’m just an everyday mom.
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