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Candid w riters reveal what happens when people
walk down the aisle before strolling out of the closet
T he M arried M an
by Edmund W hite.
Alfred A . Knopf, 2000;
$25 hardcover.
ustin Sm ith, a mid
dle-aged American
living in Paris,
meets a young married
French man named
Julien. A complex rela
tionship blossoms.
Austin, who is HIV
positive in a time
before the latest anti
viral therapies, believes
he has found the man who will care for him as
his disease progresses and consumes him. But
Austin is wrong.
It has been the habit of many 20th century
fiction writers to deny autobiographic content in
their novels. Hemingway jumped through fiery
verbal hixips in his protestations against his
characters and situations being “the truth,” even
as his publisher scrambled to protect himself
from libel. Others shunned the structures of nar
rative and character altogether in an effort to
erase biographical comparisons.
Edmund W hite is not, to our eternal bene
fit, like most 20th century fiction writ
ers. His writing is unabashedly autobi
ographical. Each new tale is a glimpse
into his own private life, only thinly
veiled with the light gauze of exagger
ation, a lace o f humor and a creative
weave of chronology. By thus embrac
ing the self-revelatory aspect of his fic
tion, W hite “outs” fiction and the gay
experience for readers of all orienta
tions. Here before us is the truth in its
beautiful, complicated, angry, silly,
mournful fullness.
The M am ed M an largely is based on
the relationship between W hite and
his young married French lover,
( !
Hubert Sorin, with whom he lived for
six years. Names, faces and situations
have been altered with W h ites usual elegant,
sly and compassionate imagination.
This novel is revelatory, elegiac and a
damn good read. O ne cannot escape the sim
ple truth that T he M arried M an reveals in
excruciating detail the day-to-day hope and
trial of loving someone dying from AID S. Yet
the novel is not depressing; instead, it manages
to guide us through pain and disappointment
into a peaceful hope.
This book is about living as much as it is
about dying. It is filled with insight into the
aging gay persona, into the way we live and
the way we die and, most significantly, into
the way we love each other. T he novel speaks
with experiential bravado on the utter bewil
derment of sex in all its befuddled, fumbling
glory: candid episodes involving everything
from masturbation to anonymous cruising to
kept” relationships to the vindictive way we
withhold sex from those we love most.
White miraculously possesses simultaneous
ly two seemingly ambivalent qualities: candor
and style. Beneath the specifics of plot, charac
ter and language, he has given us, through the
years, an honest and intelligent view of gay life
in our times.
The Married M an proves W hite still has the
talent to enlighten us all.
— Glenn Williams
M arried W omen
W ho L ove W omen
by Carren Strock. Alyson Publications,
2000; $12.95 softcover.
a
exual identity never ceases to
have its permutations! What
happens when a woman, after 25
years of heterosexual marriage, falls in
love with her best female friend?
What if she comes to identify as les
bian but doesn’t choose to leave her
marriage?
T hat’s what happened to writer
and educator Carren Strock. So
earth-shattering was the experience
and the ensuing personal journey, she wrote a
book about it. Coupled with her own story',
Strock interviewed more than 100 married
women who love women from across the
country. She brings to light the unique chal
lenges that married bisexual and lesbian
women face: from first awareness to coming
out to sexual joy.
Newly out in paperback, M arried W omen
W ho Love Women is a primer on coming out,
feminism and contemporary lesbian politics
and culture. For the married woman who just
is discovering her homosexual feelings, or for
married lesbian
women who have felt
isolated for years, this
book will be an es
sential— and wel
come— entryway to
self-awareness and
community.
The personal rev
elations are the heart
of Strock’s book.
Readers alternately
will be moved and
challenged by the
variety of perspectives
and choices her inter
K F h N
S t r o c k
viewees have made in
their lives. Not only
do many married women who love women
(MWLWs, as Strock has self-helpfully dubbed
them) experience a renegotiation of their sex
uality, their notions of marriage are challenged
as well.
Some women find ways of accommodating
their seemingly disparate needs. Rosalie lives
and sleeps with her husband, Jack, and spends
time with her female lover, who lives next
door. They consider one another family now.
Many of the women choose to stay in their
marriages, although not all as happily as Ros
alie. For others, discovery of their homosexuali
ty leads to the dissolution of their marriages.
Although Strock s analysis and synthesis of
lesbian sexuality can be a bit preachy and sim
plistic at times, she has written an important
book that can help other married lesbian and
bisexual women feel less isolated and live fuller
lives.
— Meg Daly
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CHIVIOLIT
■ G lenn W ill ia m s unites poetry, prose, plays,
periixlica and pom in Portland.
MEG D aly is co-editor o f the anthology Letters
of Intent: Women Cross the Generations to
Talk About Family, Work, Sex, Love and the
Future of Feminism. She is unmarried and has
loved both uxrmen and men; you may unite to her
at megdaly@europa. com .
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