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W o m e n in
th e
W o o d s '2000
J uly 20-23
• Join with 100+ lesbians for a magical women-only weekend at Breitenbush Hot Springs resort in
Central Oregon, 2 hours drive from Portland • Cozy heated cabins and 3 delicious vegetarian
meals daily • Hot springs pools (open meadow and tiled tubs) and lithium sauna • Hiking trails
through Oregon's old growth forest • Swimming hole with crystal clear cold water • Massage
available • Workshops/discussion groups on anything 2 or more people want to talk about •
craftswomen space • amazing talent show • drumming circle • dancing
4 days/3 nights - $240 per person
3 days/2 nights - $160 per person
Registration deadline is July 1, 2000.
Fees must be paid in full at that time.
Call 503-284-0722 for registration form.
Our House:
A Very Real Documentary About
Kids of Gay and Lesbian Parents
Through intimate profiles of children, this documentary
presents a frank, insightful exploration of growing up in
nontraditional families.
mm
Monday, June 26
Happily ever after
Looking for hope on the silver screen
never thought I’d be saying this, hut I
watched a movie last night starring Meg
i Ryan and Tom Hanks— and I liked it. It was
late, I was flipping through the channels
aimlessly, and there it was. It was You’ve Got
Mail, a film I was sure would make me want to
retch.
But it was that or reruns of The Brady Bunch
on Nick at Nite. You can only watch Marcias
nose get broken by that football so many times,
so I decided to take a chance on
Meg and Tom.
Much to my surprise, it was
charming. O f course, it has the
advantage of being based on the
wonderful 1940 Jimmy Stewart
film The Shop Around the Comer,
which was made at a time when
people still knew how to make
charming films. Still, even in its
updated version it manages to
retain something that very few
films these days have: It made me
believe in romance again.
I know, I always complain
that romance is dead. Well, it
is, especially in the movies that
pass for romantic comedies
these days. Gone are films
like It Happened One Night
and The Philadelphia Story,
movies that had you really
hoping the main charac
ters would get together by
BY
the end of the picture.
MICHAEL
Now we just have anxiety-
ridden star vehicles in
THOMAS
which we’re forced to watch
FORD
characters undergo 90 minutes
of therapy while they try to figure out why they
can’t commit to each another before deciding
they’re better off single. Let’s face it, the last
movie that really gave us a good romantic end
ing featured Julia Roberts as a hooker doing
Richard Gere a favor. Hardly the stuff of fairy
tales.
Perhaps I was particular
ly susceptible to You've Got
Mail because I’d just come
from a screening at my local
queer film festival of a
movie that was anything but
romantic. I won’t embarrass
the creator by naming the
film. I will just say that it
was a painful, not very origi
nal look at the demise of a
dysfunctional gay relation
ship. It wa one of those
movies where you hate all the charac ters, don’t
want any of them to end up happy, and feel the
need to shower immediately upon returning
home because everyone in the film smoked too
much.
As I watched Tom and Meg doing their
courtship dance, I found myself wondering why
all the queer relationship films I’ve ever seen
are so depressing. I couldn’t think of even one
out of the many I’ve watched over the years
after which I felt a sense of hope, a feeling of
happiness because the characters really seemed
to enjoy being in love and getting lost in the
joy of being together. Instead, the films all
seem to be about how dismal it is trying to find
someone to love.
This surprises me. As a rule, gay audiences
go wild for those old romantic comedies. At
least, most of the guys I know do. We love to
see other people’s lives turn out well. But not,
apparently, our own lives. The films we make
about our romances tend to be pretty bleak,
filled with one-night stands that never call
back, boyfriends who cheat, and lots and lots of
drinking.
I think Jeffrey is supposed to be a romantic
comedy, but it comes off more as a farce than
anything heartwarming. And Love, Valor,
Compassion is sweet in its way, although it
doesn’t exactly leave me with a warm, fuzzy
feeling. The closest gay cinema has come to
creating anything truly like an old-fashioned
romantic comedy is last year’s Trick. But it was
hard to really become caught up in the trials
and tribulations of two guys trying to find a
place where they can get off.
Although the film tries to redeem itself
with a sweet, nonsexual ending, it is a little too
late. A stripper nicknamed “Beer C an ” is no
match for Cary Grant or Clark Gable.
My friend Jeff says there will never be a true
queer romantic comedy, because only straight
people still fall for the
notion.of happily ever after.
He thinks gay filmmakers
opt for bitterness over senti
mentality because it’s more
realistic. “Watching two
guys looking for a place to
have sex is a lot more
believable to most of us
than watching them do a
courtship dance,” he said to
me once. “It’s probably
because we know that, even
if they do fall in love, one
of them will leave the other for a guy at the
gym six months later.”
That does indeed seem to be the basic mes
sage of most gay films about relationships. But
is it because we really aren’t good at romance,
or is it because it’s easier to jump straight to the
bitterness and save ourselves the risk of getting
hurt by trying something else?
Maybe it’s time we gave it another try. After
all, if Tom and Meg can do it, so can we.
The films we make
about our romances
tend to be pretty
bleak, filled with
one-night stands
that never call back,
boyfriends who
cheat, and lots and
lots of drinking.
H M ichael T homas F ord welcomes e-mail at
Shopiltee@aol. com.
Congratulations to
Michael Thom as Ford, who ju st won his
second Lambda Literary Award for his
book That’s M r. Faggot to You.