aprii 21 ,2ÛÛÛ v
Into the heartland
Notes on m oving from a large AIDS organization
to a ru ral com m unity
fter six years with the Speak to Your
ately accelerated and drew alongside. The dri
Brothers program at Cascade A ID S Pro
ver was a nice-looking guy in his late 30s. He
ject, I took a job in a rural community an
turned his head and our eyes met. I nodded
hour north of Portland. I was seeking the
and smiled— in place of honking and waving
American heartland, my own version of Our
and pointing wildly to myself. He smiled back
Town. (Thornton Wilder was gay, you know.) I
and we went our separate ways. (Note for
wanted to get away from big city anonymity
chance encounter ad: You were driving a
and live and work in a rural setting, where 1
brown Honda Civic. I was in a red Subaru
Impreza...)
could find a true sense of community; where
everybody knows your name (and probably
And I expected that I might encounter
your income, marital problems, sex some homophobia. I had been open in my
ual proclivities...); where there is a
interview. If being gay was going to be an issue,
basic salt-of-the-earth, bone-deep
I wanted it to be an issue then, not after I was
I decency about the people. Pleas -
hired. I’m sure everyone in the two-county area
antville, but in color. I wanted to
knows by now. The Internet is still light years
get back to those core values that
away ffom the speed of word-of-mouth in a
small community.
once made America great.
1 expected there would be
But what I wasn’t expecting occurred with
adjustments. Music would be coun
in the first month at my new job. I had been
try western rather than classical,
spending time with each of my staff, becoming
bluegrass rather than the blues.
acquainted with them and their programs. I
was finishing up with an older woman on our
There would probably be a lot
team when she said abruptly, “I hear you
fewer penis jokes. I would miss the
worked with AIDS people.” She was the first
office conversations and joking we
person there to make any mention of this.
enjoyed at CAP, which might have
(AIDS people. Tsk, tsk, my politically
been considered sexual
correct mind chuffed. It sound
harassment anywhere
ed too much like the Pod
else. I would miss the
pe0ple, or the Sand Peo
unique office decora
V _»4
■ja'v >>
ple.) She was staring at
tions: Brian’s collection
me.
*v» *
of dildos lined up across his desk,
“Yes, I have,” I said.
standing erect like little toy soldiers;
There
followed an awk
or Geoffrey’s safer sex poster ffom
ward silence. To fill it, 1
Germany, depicting two guys doing
offered a nutshell ver
it doggy-style (oh, those Europeans!)
sion of my prevention
with the stirring HIV prevention
work in Australia and
message “Sicker sex fuer schwule
at CAP, thinking it
maennerl" which roughly translates
V
better
to leave out the
into something like “Germans do it
parts about staging
better.” 1 knew I would miss those
safer sex demon
vi
strations in the
;
bathhouse. Then
,;
I sat there, wait
ing, bracing
myself. Was she
.
going to give me a
piece of her mind
I
about “those peo
y -1
ple” ?
She lowered
her eyes and her
,;
voice dropped
almost to a whis
per. “My son has
AIDS.”
I felt a chill
pass through me. I got up and closed the
Heated arguments among our prevention team
office door, and sat back down. “Would you
about the merits of different flavored condoms,
like to tell me about it?” I asked.
and discussing really important questions, such
Quietly, hesitantly, she began telling me
as why, amidst banana, chocolate, strawberry
about
her son. I listened, and as I listened, I
and grape, are there no semen-flavored con
realized how easily, how casually I speak of
doms.
A ID S and HIV. Over the years they have
I expected I would feel some isolation.
become part of my daily vocabulary, and I
Although first impressions could lead one to
suddenly understood what it’s like for most
assume that there’s a considerable lesbian pop
people, who do not speak about AIDS every
ulation up here— it’s something to do with the
day, and when they do it’s in hushed tones,
way the women dress, wear their hair, their
probably only within the family, and for
swagger— I found this assumption to be an
whom it’s a taboo word, full of shame and fear
error, and possibly dangerous to my health.
and sorrow.
By the second week, I was missing gay peo
And as I sat there listening to her story, l
ple in my life. By the third week, I was becom
thought: Welcome to the heartland.
ing desperate. WKilc driving to work one
jn°tning, I saw a car sporting a rainbow
■ A lan R ose is a member of Portland Gay
bumper sticker proclaiming “Celebrate diversi
Men Writing. To learn more about the group,
fy I became unusually aroused and hoped it
contact
Patrick at (503) 2 3 1 -8866.
Wasn t just a tourist passing through. I immedi-
Quietly
hesitantly she
began telling me
about her son
listened and
as I listened
I realized how
easily how
casually
I speak of
AIDS and HIV.
PORTLAND BAROQUE ORCHESTRA
MONICA
HUGGETT
/ ARTISTIC
DIRECTOR
v
i
i A?
>>,
V iv a ld i’s
H a rm o n ic S p irit
PBO presents selections from Vivaldis
exhuberant concerto collection, L’Estro
Armotiico, featuring artistic director
Monica Huggett on violin, Richard
Savino on lute, Sarah Freiberg on cello
and Rob Diggins on viola d’amore.
Fri. & Sat., April 28 & 29, 8 p.m .
Sun., A pril 30, 3 p.m .
SAVE
5 0%
A ll C oncerts at Trinity C athedral
Free lecture one hour before each concert:
"Vivaldi: A royal gift o f rare timbres,” presented by
world-renowned Baroque guitarist and lutenist
Richard Savino.
(5 0 3 )2 2 2 -6 0 0 0
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