4 Just out •
out
, 16. 1999
More from the
‘Grandma’ department
To the E ditor :
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The first thought I had when I read Marty
Davis’ editorial [“Your Grandma Is Watching.
Keep Your Pants On,” Just Out, June 4] was that
she’s got guts. (Actually it was halls, but I
thought I’d get slammed by dykes who felt that
wasn’t a politically correct way of saying things.)
I thought, here’s someone who has the
means to get these thoughts out to lots of gays
and lesbians and has the courage to say some­
thing that needs to be said.
Davis’ editorial didn’t make me feel chas­
tised. I’m not uptight about sex or exhibition­
ism, but 1 am uptight about [certain behav­
iors]—especially around children.
My partner and I have five children of vary­
ing ages. After seeing some of the things I saw
during pride (bare butts and breasts), we’ll either
just not go next year—or if we do, we certainly
won’t bring our kids, at least not the younger
ones. And that really makes me irritated because
my kids have been sharing this with us since
they were toddlers and they love it! But the
scenery is just getting progressively worse.
(One letter writer suggested there be anoth­
er festival where people can parade around the
way they want to—just don’t call it gay and les­
bian pride.)
In response to all the negative letters regard­
ing Davis’ editorial: Y’all sound like a bunch of
selfish whiners! So what if you have to conform
a little for one or two days. We all have to do a
little conforming one way or another during the
course of our lives—it’s a part of growing up.
Try thinking about more than yourselves—
it’s not only your pride festival, it’s all of ours,
and many of us are beginning to choose not to
come back.
T ina C onover
Vancouver, Wash.
What about the children?
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What about the kids? Times have changed.
The gay, lesbian, bi and trans community has
come a long way since Stonewall. We have chil­
dren now. If we want to have the parade include
family members of lesbians and gays and gay
children, then we have to have a parade that
includes their needs, too.
Sex and children don’t belong in the same
surroundings. I know children are sexual
beings—duh. But they are sexual in an inno­
cent, tender way. Not in a down and dirty, let’s
party and have our freedom of expression way.
That’s scary for kids and not developmentally
appropriate, either. Standing next to three chil­
dren who were under 10 years old, my partner
and two of our friends felt the children’s vulner­
ability. We couldn’t be the only ones feeling
uncomfortable watching the parade [while]
standing next to children.
We, the gay, lesbian, bi, trans community of
Portland need to decide whether we want the
parade to include any and all who want to be
there, and if so, then we, the pride participants,
must agree to respect the needs of everyone
there. It means asking ourselves: Will I bring my
kids to the parade when somebody is rubbing
just rm
Welcomes letters
to the editor.
her nipples at the crowd or marching in the
parade with a visibly naked penis oehind a tiny
little skirt. Can we all agree on what kinds of
parades we want to bring our children to? We
certainly want our children to learn who we are.
How do we want to tell them or show them?
Let’s ask our community.
If we decide the parade isn’t for children,
then we send the political message that the
nudity and freedom of sexual expression are
more important than the reflection of who we
are as a whole community.
K ris B alle
S tevie N ewcomer
I zetta S mith
Portland
A plea bom off love
To the E ditor :
In mid-March, Sven Gomez was found dead
in his apartment [“Murdered?” Just Out, April
2].
Sven was one of my best friends. He had an
outlook on life that brought hope to the most
depressing situations. He always had a smile and
was willing to help anyone in need.
His death was a great shock to me. All 1
could think about was the last time I saw him,
some days earlier, at Silverado. I went over to
give him a hug and say hello, never realizing it
would be the last time I would ever see my
friend.
After Sven’s death, I spent several hours with
Portland police detectives, going through per­
sonal pictures and details of Sven’s life. During
this time, I realized that Sven had no immediate
family here in the States. (They’re back in his
native Colombia.) We, the gay and lesbian
community, we’re his family. My partner and 1
made the arrangements for a memorial service
in April in Portland’s South Park Blocks. About
40 people showed up, many of whom 1 had
never met. There were people from Sven’s
apartment building, co-workers from II Fomaio,
and friends from all walks of life. We all had a
chance to say a few words in remembrance. 1 was
amazed at how deeply Sven had touched these
people.
To date, Sven’s death has gone unsolved. If
there is anyone out there who knows anything
about his final days or has overheard something
that just didn’t sit quite right, I urge you to call
the detectives at (503) 823-0400. Sven’s family
and friends need to know what happened. He
was too great a person to let it end like this. I
have faith in my fellow humans and have to
believe that someone out there knows more
information.
B rian H arris
Portland
Stand and deliver
To the E ditor :
I was infuriated by the arrogance of the born-
again bigots promoting their sexist, racist,
homophobic ideology at the gay pride march.
These are the same right-wingers who have
been picketing queer functions and nonprofit
agencies that support the sexual minority com­
munity ["Hello Hate,” Just Out, June 18].
x Letters must be accompanied by
a phone number for verification
purposes. Anonymous letters and
letters without sufficient contact
information will not be published.
Instead of hoping they will go away, we need
to organize a system of communication and
mobilization of activists who will counterprotest
whenever they show.
Left to their own devices, these “God-fear­
ing” gay bashers will multiply. Our community
needs to come together to defend each other
from this harassment.
J ordana S ardo
Radical Women
Portland
Why we march
To the E ditor :
Pride ’99 is over, but some of the reactions of
the media remind us that there is much to be
done in the way of informing the public what is
being celebrated. Lars Larson and some other
daytime radio talk show hosts made capital over
questioning why anyone would want to cele­
brate pride, even asking questions such as
“Would heterosexuals want to parade to tell
who they are?”
The raison d’etre for the gay pride parade,
interestingly enough, is the same as the initial
motivation for the St. Patrick’s Day Parade,
which has no religious significance in spite of its
name. The treatment of poor, starving Irish
when they arrived in the United States in the
1840s and ’50s is a blight on our history. They
reached the point where they were no longer
going to be put down for being who they were.
Using the cover of St. Patrick, they asserted
themselves, marching in parades as an expres­
sion of in-your-face we’re-Irish-and-proud-of-it.
Such a parade was unknown in Ireland.
Whether the parade is by gays and lesbians
or the Irish, the initial reasons are the same:
assertion of who we are and our right to be proud
of it.
N estor P erala
Portland
Sending thanks
To the E ditor :
In the small Eastern Oregon town where I
grew up, there’s a custom of publishing “cards of
thanks" in the local weekly newspaper. These
published thank-yous usually acknowledge
those who help in an illness, those who are there
for a bereaved family, those who pitch in when
a house bums down and help the family get back
on their feet.
Here is my own card of thanks to your news­
paper for the article about the Lesbian Commu­
nity Project’s new office (“LCP’s New Digs," Just
Out, May 21]; I think the article was well done.
Another card of thanks is also due Pam Monette
and Elise Campbell for all that they did to help
the Lesbian Community Project in its time of
need. I want to especially thank them for pro­
viding office space for LCP in their home during
the past year and a half. Without their help, the
organization could very well have died.
S ally C ohn
Acting board chair
Lesbian Community Project
Portland
is on Page 9.
(It will return to its usual
location in the next issue.)