may 21. 1999 * ju s t
Vayas con lesbos
JEWEL A. ROBINSON
Highway Holly and Amblin’ Amber are poised
to take the country, one mile at a time
Multimillion $ Producer
OFFICE (503) 281-4040
mber is sure to be the hero of this story.
When you take off cross-country in a 19-
foot 1972 motor home, you need a good
solid butch at the wheel. My traveling
companion is carpenter, mechanic, plumber
and electrician, wrapped up in a tall, dark and
handsome package. 1 am one lucky girl.
Of course, I’m not the only lucky one.
Betty, our homely but lovable recreational
vehicle, has been rescued from an ignominious
state of mildew and mechanical
disarray by Am bers tender minis
trations.
It’s a classic butch-femme trian
gle. Amber takes care of Betty and
1 take care of Amber. And Betty,
VOICE MAIL (503) 301-4283
destination, you do not get to park and hop
out. You must drive the vehicle back and forth
over stacks of boards for at least half an hour
before you can sit back and enjoy the stupen
dous absence of road noise.
Lesson No. 2 revealed itself when we pulled
into a Warm Springs filling station on our
return trip. That’s right, at 10 miles per gallon,
Betty could not make it over Mount Hood and
back on a single tank of gas.
There we were, at the end of a highly suc
cessful first run with Betty. The bed had been
delightfully comfy. The kitchen had hosted
several meals and even baked us biscuits in the
morning. We were ready to head back to one
final month of work in Portland, starting with
E-MAIL Jewel2U@teleport.com
aia
1730 N.E. 10th Avenue
Portland, OR 97212
m Prudential
^
See my
Exclusive
Listings
on our
webpage
http://www.
pru-nw.com
Spring Anniversary Sale
HOME
AUDIO
SYSTEMS
DISCONTINUED » DEMOS » DINGS » DEALS
Check out the newsletter on our website for a detailed
listing o f Special Sale Items, Descriptions and Prices :
www.stereotypesaudio.com
2627 N .E . B R O A D W A Y • P O R T L A N D
Christi O’Hara,
we hope, motors us across the
country and back during the wan
ing months of the millennium.
When you read this, we’ll be
sunning ourselves in the desert of
southern Utah, on the first stage of
a seven month road trip adventure.
As 1 write this, I’m wondering how
we’ll ever make it out of town.
The trip has been in the works for
more than a year. The checklists
began in earnest on Valentine’s
Day. Betty joined our family a few
months ago and has since occupied
many a night and
weekend. But the reality of our
bold plan didn’t fully hit until
our maiden voyage at the end
of April.
When we pulled into the
RV camping area at Kah-Nee-
Ta , we realized what we’d done.
Despite our queer sensibilities
and bohemian rig, we were
joining the mainstream in a
more scenic version of subur
ban cul-de-sac living.
As we sputtered into place
among the mobile mansions
that lorded over the camp
ground, a friend observed:
“They would zone you out if
they could.” Satellite dishes,
portable Astroturf side yards,
extra rooms popping out all over, not to men
tion scads of boats and bikes and U.S. flags.
You'can guess what we did first. That’s
right, we scoped out the other dykes. Sure
enough, two older women were holding down
the far comer of the lot in their inconspicuous
and terribly sensible pickup truck and camper.
Ignoring the raised eyebrows around us,
Amber proceeded with the post-arrival ordeal
called leveling. That was Lesson No. 1 in our
new RV lifestyle. When you pull in to your
the media event I was coordinating with the
mayor the next morning. And Betty wouldn’t
start.
Keep in mind, we are two highly competent
lesbians, and one of us is even mechanically
inclined. Amber worked a little under the
hood. Nothing. We waited for Betty to cool
down. Nothing. We called AAA.
We waited 45 minutes for the mechanic to
drive up from Madras. He worked a little more
under the hood. Nothing. We prepared to get
towed back over the mountain to the outskirts
of Portland. We lined up a ride to fetch us from
wherever the tow truck dumped us.
Only then, almost two
hours later, when the mechan
ic reached inside by the steer
ing wheel, he noticed that the
gear shift was still set on drive.
“Hey, it’s good news!” he
shouted kindly. It did little to
lessen this sobering smack to
our supercompetent egos.
Starting up Betty in park or
neutral is a lesson we won’t
need to learn again.
More importantly, we got
to practice waiting for a rescue
vehicle— something we will
surely get to do again in the
long months and many miles
ahead. And we waited in style,
kicking back on Betty’s vin
tage avocado-green and har
vest-gold couches, listening to CDs, doing a lit
tle housekeeping, a little paperwork. At least
that’s what I did.
Amber was outside in the drizzle tweaking
stuff under the hood, waiting for the mechanic
and then working with him. That’s why she’s
bound to be the hero of this story.
It's a classic
butch-femme
triangle. Amber
takes care of
Betty and I take
care of Amber
And Betty we
hope, motors us
across the
country and back
during the
waning months
of the
millennium.
■ En route, HOLLY PRUETT will be checking her
e-m ail fo r travel tips. She can be contacted at
hjpruett@ aol.com .
Sales and Leasing Consultant
Featuring No-Hassle Service on:
• New and used Saturn sedans, wagons and coupes
• Close to 4 0 0 used vehicles including SUVs,
trucks, cars, etc.
Used inventory can be viewed a t www.russauto.com
Contact Christi today: 644-4600
(800) 886-8635 • ckohara@hotmail.com
Saturn of Beaverton
S A TU R N . Corner of Canyon Road and SW 1 3 9 th Ave.
A D
iffe r e n t
K in d
of C
o m pany
. A D iffe r e n t K in d
of C
ar
Gerard Lillie*5934 N.E. Halsey
M e c h a n i c s
W ith
A C onscience
282-3315
Certified DEQ Repair Facility
Complete automotive service
of Japanese and American cars
and light trucks.
ASE Certified Mechanics
.