Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013, December 15, 1995, Page 17, Image 17

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    j u s t o u t ▼ d o c s .r ib o r 1 9 . I M S ▼ 17
ROXANNE ELLIS
MICHELLE ABDILL
/\ C ommunity G rieves
Two loving, exuberant Medford lesbians are slain. Family, friends and other mourners share memories of
Roxanne and Michelle and vow to continue their work.
by Inga Sorensen
oxanne Ellis and Michelle Abdill
had a knack for reaching out to
people—even in the most subtle
ways.
“I remember our first meeting.
My partner Catherine and I were going away for a
few days and we needed a pet sitter,” recounts 56-
year-old Anna Holmes, who shares a home on a
sprawling five-acre plot in the Medford area with
45-year-old Catherine Pritchett, her partner of five
years. In the great rural tradition, the duo also
inhabit their space with a cadre of animals includ­
ing four horses, three dogs, a cockatoo and an
Amazon parrot.
“This was in 1991 and Catherine and I were not
out yet. Roxanne had a pet-sitting service back
then. When she was driving away, Catherine spot­
ted a pink triangle on her truck. She also left a Just
Out or a Lavender Network on the table.”
It was, says Holmes, a quiet yet inspirational
connection that left an indelible imprint on her and
Pritchett—it was a sensation bom of the joy and
relief that often come from knowing “members of
the family” are within reach. For lesbians and gay
men residing in more isolated enclaves, it is a
particularly potent experience.
Bumper sticker-speak also helped bring Jim
Willeford together with Ellis and Abdill, who were
partners for 12 years.
“I was at a flea market [four years ago] and I
saw a truck in the lot with a We Are Everywhere
bumper sticker and a blue and gold [real estate
agent] symbol on it,” says Willeford, a 56-year-old
Rogue Valley real estate agent, who did not want
his hometown named for safety reasons. “Well, I
certainly couldn’t resist those two signals, so I left
my card on their car and wrote ‘Call me.’ They
did.”
That marked the beginning of his rich relation­
ship with Abdill and Ellis, who have called Med­
ford their home for five years. That relationship
ended abruptly on Dec. 7, when the couple were
found murdered in what law enforcement officials
are investigating as a possible hate crime.
The sheer ugliness of the crime sent shock
waves throughout Oregon— and the nation—but
friends of the women want to make sure that Ellis’
and Abdill’s legacy of love and commitment to
community survive.
“They were incredible role models. They had
so much passion and dedication to the entire com­
munity, and their deep love for each other was
obvious,” says Brenda Brown, a 35-year-old men­
tal health professional who lives in Ashland.
“One of my biggest fears is that I could not live
up to their legacy because it was so powerful and
bright,” says Brown, who is openly lesbian and a
member of the board of directors of the Lambda
Community Center Association, an organization
working toward the creation of a lesbian and gay
community center in Southern Oregon. “They were
shining examples of the best a person could be.”
Ellis, 54, and Abdill, 42, moved toOregon from
Colorado Springs in late 1990. The Dec. 8 issue of
the Colorado Springs Gazette Telegraph describes
Ellis as the “shy reserved one” who— while living
in Colorado Springs—co-owned a catering com­
pany called the Picnic Basket. Abdill, meanwhile.
is described in the news story as Ellis’ “bubbly,
outgoing mate [who was then] a nurse’s assis­
tant.... Both enjoyed sports, and a fun day for them
might have been passing out Gatorade to runners in
a charity race or seeing that a church fund-raiser
went off without a hitch.”
“We were all big fans of the Broncos, too,”
remembers 40-year-old Ellen Gabbert, who was
good friends with the couple when they all lived in
Colorado.
In 1991, Gabbert, a nurse, left that state—due
in large part to the hostile climate created by
Amendment 2, an anti-gay initiative— and moved
to a small town in Minnesota.
“I’ve been going through my pictures and I
remember them organizing our group for our first
Gay Pride Parade— we all almost died of the heat
but not from fear of the masses,” Gabbert tells Just
Out.
“I remember the Super Bowl parties.... We
were all nuts for the Broncos,” she says. “1 remem­
ber the holidays when Roxie and Michelle would
have all of us over to be with family—they would
invite old partners, co-workers and children. We
always talked about helping people to see the gay
community as a vital part of the whole commu­
nity.”
She adds: “They were the movers and shakers
of our gay community center in Colorado Springs,
the rest of us were the followers.”
According to the Gazette Telegraph, the couple
sold their Colorado home “for much less than they
had paid for it” because, says a source, “they
wanted to go to Oregon where Michelle’s family
lived. Michelle wanted to be close to her mom and
help her run the business.”
And that’s exactly what they did. By Novem­
ber 1990 they had sold their home and settled in
Medford, a city of about 55,000. Abdill joined her
family in running the Annette Abdill Real Estate
School and later opened ESP Property Manage­
ment with Ellis.
“They have this whole female family,” says
Willeford. “There’s Roxie and Michelle; Roxanne’s
daughter, Lorri; and her 3-year-old daughter,
Hannah. And there’s Michelle’s mother, Annette.
They make up the neatest family.”
And, says Willeford, they were generous in
sharing their family with others. He cites the ex­
ample of Rex Jessee and Bill Rueger, a longtime
gay male couple active in the Southern Oregon
community. Both died this year of AIDS compli­
cations.
“Michelle and Roxanne were always there for
Rex and Bill. They made sure there was a constant
flow of food and that errands were run. Michelle
was a real administrator,” he laughs. “Even when
Hannah was a tiny baby they would bring her over
to [Rueger’sand Jessee’s home]. Rex loved Hannah
so, and she called him Grandpa Rex.”
Ellis and Abdill became highly respected mem­
bers of the business community and were also
deeply involved in church activities. Ellis was on
the board of trustees of the Ashland First United
Methodist Church, and Abdill was the head of the
church’s growth committee.
Continued on page 19