ju s t o u t ▼ o c to b a r 6, 1 8 8 5 ▼ 3
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Facing real adversity
To the Editor:
I’m sorry that I couldn’ t respond to your reader’s
survey in time for you to include my thoughts into
your findings. It’s not that I simply put off com
pleting the survey; I just needed this much time to
come up with some of the answers.
Many of my thoughts match the ones that you
have already published, so not much was lost. One
question, however, asked if I was planning any
major purchases in the next year. It’s taken me a
few months to be able to answer openly: Yes. I am
saving up for a funeral.
I’ve never been one to set money aside. I live
for the moment. But my dear, precious, gentle
Martin will die soon. I have never before said this
to anyone, including myself. His funeral will be the
best of everything, just as his life has been. I have
given myself all sorts of fake reasons why I have
been saving $50 of each paycheck this year. But
finally I can now see and say why.
You also asked if I had any suggestions for
making Just Out better. I do. I would hope that you
would start limiting the length of whiny letters to
the editor. Maybe 25 words? So many letters are of
the same theme: “I’m feeling hurt and angry and
since I am very important I want to go on for 2,000
words describing whose fault it is.” This is tire
some. Perhaps you could start a column for these
folks. You could call it the EPB column, short for
“endless, petty bickering.”
Better that these people direct their energies to
volunteering at Our House, planning for next year ’ s
Race for the Cure, or teaching children how to
read, than lashing out at other people. I have
witnessed a man brace against months of indigni
ties and still maintain a loving grace. When your
readers whine so much, it makes me wonder what
they will do when they really face adversity.
Thanks, Just Out, for the courage to ask for
criticism. Love ya!
Ryan Qboy@aol.com
Don’t take gifts for granted
To the Editor:
I missed the survey and wanted to share my
view of your newspaper. I am new to Portland, a
transplant from the east (arrived May 22 at 2:30
am, three and one-half months ago, but who’s
counting?), and I love Just Out. It is part of why I
love Portland. I am from a state where men and
women do not even share the same gay paper!
There was no community, per se. Cities, or towns
as you would more honestly refer to them, had
separate papers when they were only 45 minutes
apart, and there was no centralized, cooperative
paper that covered Connecticut gay life—even
though you can drive through Connecticut in three
hours, top to bottom or side to side.
Your multifaceted, cooperative community is
represented well in Just Out. There are personal
ads for the men in the back, in a small enough
quantity that I don’t feel like the paper is for sex
sales. Metroline, the Hartford gay paper, was male-
oriented and filled with phone-sex ads from one
end to the other, often full-page ads. There was
very little to read! I love your graphics, the variety
of issues addressed, your comics oriented toward
lesbians, gay men and whomever in sufficient
variety; yourcalendar is my lifeline to this commu
nity and is substantive as well, and I enjoy your
articles.
As you read responses, do not be upset to find
that gay men do not want to hear about women’s
issues. This has been discovered in gay surveys
before. Even though we are lesbian, gay, bisexual
and so on, we are still conditioned by this great
society of ours, and men are not taught to be
sensitive to or listen to women. They only do it if
they choose to work at the art, and just being a gay
man does not automatically imply that the motiva
tion to be sensitive to women is there. Nor is the
desire to treat them (us) as equal!
I think your paper is balanced. That’s the prob
lem for some men. Often in my experience (and in
what I’ve read) men feel displaced if they don’t
dominate. Equality is just not good enough. Women
are usually pleased with equality. It is a good sign
that women are pleased!
Please keep doing what you are doing. If you
wish to improve things, please do so using your
collective inner voices as your ultimate guide.
From what I’ve seen, those inner voices have done
us very well. There may be those who have never
lived deprived of a community, who may take for
granted the gifts they have in Portland. Please
know you are one of those gifts, that you are doing
a great job, and that many of us are thrilled with
Just Out. Keep it coming. Thank you.
Paula Casner
Portland
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We’re fortunate to have
Kathy Beige
To the Editor:
Reading the Youth column by Inga Sorensen in
the Sept. 1 issue of Just Out, “School is Hell,” I had
flashbacks (not for the first time) of my own
confusing and difficult time in high school. Al
though I did not come out until after I graduated, I
was considered a “queer” by many of my peers,
who labeled me a “fag” and all the usual epithets.
With all the abuse I received— verbal only, I was
lucky—even when I was closeted (or more accu
rately, questioning), I can hardly imagine how
much worse it might have been if I had been out.
High school is the time when young people are just
coming to an understanding of their sexual iden
tity, and the violence and abuse hurled at gay,
lesbian and bisexual students is like attacking a
caterpillar in its chrysalis, when it is at its most
vulnerable, transformatory stage.
I consider myself fortunate in many ways that
have eased my journey towards my sexual iden
tity: a supportive mother, an older gay cousin,
excellent friends, a good overall support system.
However, for others who are not so fortunate I am
glad there is someone like Kathy Beige out there to
lend a much-needed helping hand and support.
Knowing Kathy personally from the various gay/
lesbian/bisexual youth groups I attend, I can attest
to the fact that she is a dedicated, warmhearted,
assertive woman who genuinely cares about the
welfare of young gay persons. The gay youth of
Multnomah County are fortunate to have her on
our side. Let us hope a time will come when we
won’t need people like Kathy Beige to help make
life tolerable. High school is hard enough without
the prejudice.
Anthony Schlottman
Portland
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