j u s t o u t T D scsm b sr 1900 ▼ 5
N o such thing
To the Editor:
I am writing in response to your bisexuality
article and particularly in response to Linda
Shirley’s comment that 'T here is no such thing
[as bisexuality]...” and that “ whoever you’re
sleeping with now, that’s what you are.”
Who I sleep with is certainly part of my being
a lesbian, but my lesbian identity is larger than
that, including being woman-identified, my cul
ture, perspective, psycho-social factors, etc.
W hile I have much in common with some
heterosexuals, I am not “just like” them, except
for who I sleep with. I resent and resist such
glossing over of other parts of me, my identity,
community and culture.
I am not a bisexual and would not presume to
speak for them or for lesbians who have chosen
to become involved with men. I do know,
though, that historically and even now, lesbians
have lived with/slept with and even loved men
while retaining a lesbian identity — maybe it
was a route to having children, security or fam
ily acceptance. I don’t call a lesbian “straight”
based on who she is sleeping with anymore than
I assume a woman is a lesbian just because she
is having sex with women.
I admit to sometimes feeling threatened by,
abandoned by, or mistrustful of women who’ve
previously identified as lesbians and who later
became involved with men (whether they call
themselves straight now or bisexual.) But if a
woman in that place, or one who just calls her
self bi, seems to be being honest with herself,
treats me with respect, and continues to be gay
positive and gay-supportive, I ’ll try to not judge
her, to respect that she is on her path, and I’ll try
to stick to working on my own fears, insecurities
and other issues.
T here’s my two cents. I hope I speak for
other lesbians, too.
Gilah Tenenbaum
Portland..
M aking mention
of race
To the Editor:
This letter is in response to your request for
feedback on whether or not race should be men
tioned in the personals advertisements. I am one
person who adamantly refused to run an adver
tisement that wouldn’t allow me to mention my
race. I happen to be a gay, black, female. My
girlfriends have been black, white and Hispanic.
I have been fortunate enough to have met a lot of
great people from many different countries. I am
very proud of my nationality and my heritage.
When I became involved with my various girl
friends, it was because both she and I "hit it o f f ’
personality-w ise, physically, intellectually
etc...and not because we were looking for some
one in a particular race. I would never advertise
looking for a particular race because I have no
preference. There is however an unwritten code
with most newspapers in which you can usually
assume that if a person’s race is not mentioned,
the person is white. In my advertisem ent I
wanted to eliminate having to deal with any rac
ists which, yes, I was shocked to learn, exist even
in the gay community. I was also hoping to en
courage other women of color to respond to my
advertisem ent which stated “ age or race not
important.” In my day-to-day living I deal with
people who discriminate against me because I
am female, black, gay, in a nontraditional career,
and a little younger than m ost of my fellow
workers. I don’t want to have to wade through
that same garbage when I am looking for com
panionship. I hope you will take these things
into consideration when rewriting your policies.
P.S. I think your newspaper is a very positive
asset of our community.
Helen Ford
Portland
Editors note: Thank you fo r your input, a new
policy is under construction.
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Conflicting opinions
To the Editor:
thank you for printing Lisa Loving’s article
on the Bisexual Dilemma, i have been, to emu
late the author’s terminology, a gay identified
man for my entire adulthood, during high
school, however, i was what my gay friends
might call “confused.” it is a common sentiment,
especially well-developed within the gay alter-
culture, that to be bisexual is actually only a
“phase” of confusion, the mere mention of the
term is reacted against by such discounting ges
tures as a bored rolling of the eyes or a cynical
smirk, this sort of reaction only intensifies the
confusion that most sexually active persons are
trying to see beyond, my situation is probably
more similar to gays and straights than either
community would like to admit: i am strongly
attracted to one sex, yet the other sex elicits an
engaging attraction of an entirely different na
ture. now, J am certainly aware that ambiguity
can be disconcerting and annoying, but what are
we to do with those of us who defy strict catego
rization? if we are the champions of diversity
that we pride ourselves to be then i hope we can
learn to approach this situation with more integ
rity. we can never afford to treat oppression like
a well-deserved sentence or like a friend! let’s
get this problem out of the closet.
To the Editor:
I found Lena Kinsley’s letter in the Novem
ber issue to be an outrageous plea for appease
ment of straight bigotry. She refers to “opinions
[in these pages] about age-of-consent laws and
underage sex.” But, since she offers no specific
references and I know of none, nor can I imag
ine that anything has been printed in your pages
directly defending sexual abuse of children - (or
anyone) - 1 can only assume that her complaint
is that you ever print any “articles, letters, Just
Briefs or anything favorable” about adult-child
sexual activity.
Ms. Kinsley seems to acknowledge that those
people who work to repress her sexuality are the
same ones who “will exploit to the fullest any
indication that [a male child raper] ever had a
homosexual experience.” But she doesn’t use
that awareness to strengthen her resolve to op
pose arbitrary restrictions on sexuality nor to
question who is really exploiting children.
I agree that “we need to take care to avoid the
appearance of promoting exploitation or abuse,”
but I think it’s more “ important to support the
right of people of any age to explore their sexu
ality.”
mychael webb
Portland
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Portland
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