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About Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013 | View Entire Issue (June 1, 1988)
Just out Steppin’ Out Co-Publishers Photo by Jus Brown Renee LaChance and Jay Brown Editor Jay Brown Calendar Editor Meg Grace Staff Reporters Harold Moore Kamila Al-Najjar Advertising Representatives Jewel Murphy, Meg Grace, Jeff Fritz STOP UNSAFE Production Director Renee LaChance Creative Director E. Ann Hinds Typesetting Em Space Proofreading Marvin Moore Graphic Inspiration Rupert Kinnard Distribution Diana Cohen Contributors: Anndee Hochman Terri L. Jewell Cyndee L. Baudhuin Jack Riley Cathy Siemens Lee Lynch Sandra De Helen Howie Baggadonutz Joel Redon Bradley J. Woodworth Billy Russo S. Violet Bill Strubbe Michael S. Reed Eleanor Malin Mary Caselli, N.D. Dr. Tantalus Just Out is published the first of each month. Copyright 1988. No part of Just Out may be reproduced without written permission of the publishers. Written and graphic materials are welcomed for submission. All written material should be typed and double spaced. All graphic material should be black ink on white paper. Material will be edited for spelling and grammar, with the exception of letters to the editor. Deadline for submissions is the 15th of each month. Out About Town is a courtesy to our readers. Performers, clubs, individuals, or groups wanting to list events in the calendar should mail notices to Just Out by the 15th of the month preceding publication. Listings will not be taken over the telephone. Display Advertising will be accepted up to the 17th of each month. Classified ads must be received at the office of Just Out by the 17th of each month, along with payment. Ads will not be taken over the telephone. Editorial policies allow the rejection or the editing of an article or advertisement that is offensive, demeaning or may result in legal action. Just Out consults the Associated Press Stylebook and Libel Manual on editorial decisions. Views expressed in letters to the editor, columns, and features may not be those of the editorial staff of Just Out. Subscriptions to Just Out are available for $12.50 for 12 issues. First class (in an envelope) $20 for 12 issues. A free copy of Just Out and/or advertising rates are available upon request. The mailing address and telephone number tor Just Out are: P O . Box 15117 Portland. OR 97215 (503)236-1252 S A F E S E X IIIV , the virus which causes AIDS is trans mitted through direct contact with infected body fluids; i.e .. blood, semen, urine, feces and pos sibly vaginal secretions. To insure that sexual activity is safe avoid contact with body fluids. UNSAFESEX • Vaginal or anal intercourse without a latex condom Fellatio without a latex condom Semen, blood or urine in the mouth Blood contact o f any kind Oral-anal contact Fist fucking Sharing sex toys . SAFE SEX • • • • • Massage Hugging Body-to-body nibbing Voyeurism, exhibitionism, fantasy Masturbation SHARING NEEDLES IS UNSAFE DM ANY SITUATION ¿Ü r C O N T E N T S Letters ................................ 4 W hat's going on here? ....... 5 Between the L in e s ............... 6 Just N e w s ............................ 7 The Tribal Drum ................. 13 L C P ..................................... 14 Profile ................................ 15 Lesbian and Gay Pride ......... 17 Out About Town ................... 20 Music ...................................23 Just Entertainment ................ 24 Cinema ................................. 26 Eating Out ........................... 27 The Amazon Trail ................ 30 The Roseburg R e p o rt.............31 Counsel ............................... 32 H e a lth ................................... 33 Comics ................................. 34 Classifieds ........................... 35 A short account of my behavior You were the Number One student at your high school. Everyone had such dreams for you, and now you want to disappoint them! ‘ ‘ ’ BY TERRI J E W E L L y mother once asked me if I had a Death Wish. “ As if being a female and black isn’t trouble enough for you, girl. Now you are talking about dropping out of college? Your father and I have sacrificed a lot to get you into college. I couldn’t tell you how long I had to go without a winter coat to put food on the table every day. And you were the Number One student at your high school. Everyone had such dreams for you, and now you want to disappoint them. You’re going to end up like the others out there with no job and hope for a good life. What on earth has gotten into you? Well, girl, you might as well forget whatever nonsense you think you’re going to do. I M NOT GOING TO ALLOW THAT.” So, I transferred from a university in Kentucky to a small state college in New Jersey to complete the four-year program in what ended up being six years. Then, my mother asked me why I bothered to visit home during vacations. “ As if wearing those thick glasses and cutting your hair down to a nub isn’t asking for tribulation, girl. Now you are getting fatter and fatter. Don’t you care about how you look? Don’t you have any pride in yourself? Well, let me tell you something, young lady. You just come back home during your next vacation and I guarantee you will lose some of that weight. And you will stay on the diet I put you on. And we will look into getting you some contact lenses. You will look so much better. You have to suffer sometimes to be pretty. You won’t regret looking the best you can look. The way you look now, no man will want to be seen with you.” M did not go back home during vacations. I got a job and my own apartment. Later, my mother responded to a letter I had written to her. “ As if being fat. black and a young woman alone isn’t dangerous as hell. Now you’re not shaving under your arms and you say you’re a dyke ? My God! Have you gone crazy? Do you hate me that much? I have done nothing but love you, have given you everything you could I possibly want, and look how you repay me. Don’t you understand where you are? You’re not some little white girl who can get away with this. They can play all they want, but they don’t have the struggle you have in life. They will kill you just for being alive. You are just begging for death now. You better listen to me, young woman, and find some professional help.” * J o, I got a psychiatrist who told me he didn’t understand the multiple conflicts Illustration by E Ann Hinds I was experiencing with having to speak and act white in my black world. Another psychologist moved in with my lover and we grew told me she was primarily a child psychologist together. who felt that homosexuality was a pathological Still, state. She asked me if there was a substance - abuse problem in my family. I told her no, that I my mother called me and told me shortly after was seeing her to work through the guilt I felt wards, “ You just don’t care anymore, do you? over my grandmother’s death and that I just Are you trying to kill me? How did I fail you? I happened to have a woman lover who was as did the best I could. I had no lessons on how to supportive as she could be. Finally, I went to a be a good parent. You may as well blow your psychotherapist who told me to find a boyfriend, brains out. The effect will be the same as what get laid, and stop worrying about my small you are doing with your life nowadays. You will problems. I was simply too self-centered and never have a decent career. No one will want to too fat. hire a lesbian. Word gets out, you know. You won’t have decent friends. Just perverts who Yet, have to live in the very dirt they make for my mother thought I had not tried hard themselves, just like you’re doing now. And enough to solve my dilemma. “ As if being a you won’t have any children of your own. Your crazy bulldagger is not bad enough for you. I father’s bloodline will end in shame. He goes can’t have you as my daughter. I am so ashamed around now talking about the grandson he’ll of you, I can’t mention your name to the women never have that he wants so much. All that time at work who are always talking about their own in school for nothing. All our sacrificing for daughters. And you just had to get a white nothing. All my tears for nothing. JUST LOOK woman. Going around, hugging and kissing on AT YOU. DON’T YOU HAVE ANYTHING the enemy. White women get the best of the TO SAY TO ME?” black men and now they are getting the best of the black women. You are sicker than I care to think about. And you are killing your father, No, I didn't. But I did take a good look at you know that? He doesn’t say anything be myself. And what I found was a cause it hurts him so. You know how hard it is big, for him to talk his real feelings. He leaves it up strong, to me to tell you what he feels. I’d rather see you employed, lay down with a dog than lose what ’ s left of your capable, dignity to some white, trashy heifer. Get out of brown-skinned, my sight. And since you know it all, don’t happy woman in love bother to ask me for anything since you think and in glasses you’re so grown now. who was living her life exactly as she pleased. S I Just Out • 3 • June 1988