Just out. (Portland, OR) 1983-2013, January 06, 1984, Page 13, Image 13

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    By inference, then, the homosexual is
crooked. But I’m not “ crooked,” so I don’t like
that term!
JERI: OK, back to your suggestions.
REV. DELORES: I would also suggest that the
person look at where they are spiritually,
where they are sexually, and where they are
intellectually— and then get involved in read­
ing materials that stimulate where they need
to be.
There is a lot of reading material around,
magazines, too.
But mainly I would say to people, do not
shy away from the Scriptures. Our weak point
in our community, for us and for people who
support us, is the Bible. We shy away from it
We say to the world, “ I can intellectualize
with you, and forget the Bible, because that
was written too long ago, or we don’t have to
accept it as the full truth, or whatever.’’
That is why Jerry Falwell has such a grip on
our consciences. But the Scripture is what we
need to deal with that g u ilt We need to know
what the Scriptures really say.
One thing we will be doing at MCC is offer­
ing workshops — and other programs —
that will help the com m unity deal with this
The Bible is not something we can ignore.
It keeps com ing up. I’d like to see the com ­
m unity able to deal with it and not run away
from it. Many of us are running, and we don't
have to do that
JERI: What about the future? Will there come
a day when it will seem foolish to people that
they once could not accept homosexuals?
REV. DELORES: I don't know. There are still
so many people who are not willing to accept
Blacks or women or Asians or whoever...
I think that we just happen to have been
popped into a world where there’s always
going to be a need to hate someone. There
will always be a group of people with the need
to deny someone rights. I don’t believe that
we will be over these types of oppressions
until the second com ing of C hrist
In the meantime, we can lim it the ignor­
ance. We do that the way we have done it in
the black com m unity — by confronting
people who are racist or sexist or homo-
phobic. We will confront them, and we will
confront our families.
It is going to start at home. For some
reason, for gay and lesbian people, even
when they are no longer living at home, they
can’t start it at home.
But we need to start there. If we can start
where people know us best, then I think it can
be minimized in the community.
Actually, it needs to start with our accepting
ourselves. White people had a hard time fi­
guring out why Black people had to say, “ I’m
Black and I’m beautiful." Once that can be
figured out, maybe the gay and lesbian com ­
m unity can figure out why we need to say it,
We need to deal with self-acceptance, and
then challenge our families and our friends to
accept and to be a part of our lives — com ­
pletely. Then we just stretch out from there.
When I came out to my family and friends, I
did so by contacting everyone of them within
about a month to a month and a half. I told
them that I am a lesbian, and I gave them a
week or so to talk.
"This person knows and that person,” I
would say. “ Mow you can talk with each other
and get back to me if you have any questions."
It was just th a t almost clinical.
Once they worked it through and got back
to me, they all said, “Well, you know, we love
you. We accept you for who you are."
And then I let them know the rest of it Then
I had to say to them, “That is not enough.”
I had to say, “ I know you love me. I already
Just Out January 6-January 20
knew th a t I figured that with all the things
we’ve been through, you weren’t going to tell
me that you no longer loved me — not and
m ean it I’ve loved you through a whole lot of
bad stuff; you can truly love me through this
good stuff.
“ But now you need to take on my issues.
“ You need to go to the voting booth, know­
ing that you have someone that you love very
much who is a lesbian.
“You need to deal with it in school, when
your teachers or your children’s teachers are
confronting this issue of homosexuality.
“ I expect you to go right out in front of this
fight with me. If you can’t do th a t I don’t need
your love . .. because it’s not going to keep
me free.’’
That’s what we need to do. And when
enough of us do th a t you won't find so many
gay and lesbian people looking for a “ cure."
That is the cure: to have the people that
you love and respect support you, and to let
them know that if they can 't then God will
send others who can.
JERI: What would you say is the difference
between your family and families that don’t
seem to be able to handle it?
REV. DELORES: My family wasn’t given a
I think the difference was that I did not walk
in to my family and act all embarrassed and
shame-faced, and say, “ Oh, dear, I’ve got this
terrible problem. I’m a lesbian, and I don’t
know if you’re going to love me any more,
and I’m having a hard time about it all.’’
I walked in saying, “ Look. I want to share
something wonderful with you. I like women.
I love women. And I’m going to spend my life
being sexually involved and being spiritually
involved with women. I just wanted to share
that with you, and share my excitement that
I’ve found out who I am, and I’m accepting it
You’re going to have to accept it, too."
And that was when I told them the part
about having a week to make up their minds.
And I meant it
JERI: So you didn’t let yourself be put on the
REV. DELORES: No. I had lived 25 years on
the defensive. That was enough. The thing
that I was the angriest about was that I should
have done it before then.
I don’t think my family is any different My
fam ily has a variety of educational back­
grounds; they have a variety of economic
backgrounds; a variety of experiences like
any other family. The only difference is that
I’m not afraid to say to them, "Deal with me.”
I know it sounds very hard-nosed, the way I
went about it but the reason that I was hard-
nosed is that it became an issue of life and
death for me.
I could not continue to live a whole, happy,
full life, breathing in and o u t if I weren’t willing
to risk. And so I took the risk.
It sould real easy. It sounds like it was not a
painful decision for me. But it was. It tore my
guts up inside to think that I had to say that to
my mother.
But I think there comes a tim e in our lives
where if we want to live, we have to risk. I took
that risk. And I challenge other people to risk.
JERI: If you had to summarize the difference
between someone like you and someone like
Gary Brocket!, how would you state that dif­
REV. DELORES: We lead two different lives.
He has his needs, and I have mine. He has his
strengths and his weaknesses and I have
mine. He’s where he feels he needs to be. I’m
where I have to be.
I wish him luck. I wish him Godspeed.
If he feels like he has been cured from
homosexuality, then I feel like I have been
cured into it
Northwest Film Study Center
For Showtime*
221 1156
7229 NE
2 8 1 -5 7 1 3
January 4-10: FORBIDDEN PLANET (1956)
with Walter Pidgeon & Anne Francis
with Rod Taylor & Sebastian C abot
January 11-17 GIGI (1958)
with Leslie Caron. M aurice Chevalier
& Louis Jourdan
with Gene Kelly, Donald O'Connor.
D ebbie Reynolds & Cyd Charisse
h a lf p ric e adm ission with this o d
JanuarvTcbruarv 1984
In the Blue Room,
January 6-February I I
a subtle and boisterous
American comedy
Directed by Jerry Leith
Reservations — 226-3048
Critical Mass Theatre (N.W. 10th at Everett)
Jan. 6 - Feb. 12 Thurs, Fri, Sat 8 pm
Sun 7 pm
Reservations 224-9481