WEST SHORE.
AS!)
ETCHINGS.
The busy man has little to say about the climate.
' The man who always says "Business before pleasure"
has no pleasure.
No matter how Btringent the money market may be, money
is never tight when the owner is.
There is a dog in Washington City that drinks beer with
senators. He ought to be ashamed of himself.
Blood is thicker than water, and this probably accounts for
the fact that it is often so sluggish when called upon to do
sorm thing.
Delay is dangerous, but many a fellow who calls upon a
young lady and finds a big dog on the porch is willing to take
chances on the delay.
A change of chief of police in Portland by Bobs Simon
would be similar to a carpenter laying down a saw and picking
up a hammer merely a change of tools.
We never know who were our best friends till we have lost
them. The fool who has speedily parted with his money as
quickly realizes that he has lost the best friend he ever had.
From the fact that pension agents are raking the country
with a fine-tooth comb to find claimants, one might infer that
there was not such a universal demand for the dependent pen
sion law by old soldiers as was made to appear at Washington.
Bloodthirsty residents of Fresno, Cal , recently declared
that there were too many murderers eight in all in jail in
that city and announced their intention of lynching them. It
is the murderers out of jil that cause us the most anxiety up
here. When we once get them safely jugged we breathe easier.
At the time of his death Gen. Fremont was engaged upon a
paper for one of the magazines, entitled '' Finding Paths to
California." If the magazine still desires Buch an an icle it can
have it, for some of the men who found the paths and showed
Fremont where they were, are living yet in Oregon and
California.
A floating newspaper paragraph says that " The first herring
caught on the coast of Holland belongs to the king, as does the
first sturgeon caught off the coatt of England belong to the
queen." I was not before aware that royalty was so fond of
stale fidh. They would be as big a card for Chicago at the
mummy of Pharaoh's daughter.
When Powd- rly says our laws should not be framed to pro
tect illiteracy at the polls, he strikes the key note. How
ever beautiful universal suffrage may be in theory, it is utterly
absurd and harmful in practice. There ought to be some bet
ter qualification for a person to participate in the government
of ttils country than that the Individual is twenty-one yeara of
age and wears pants,
A gentleman proposes a five-cent subscription by every
man, woman and child In the north, for the erection of a mon
ument to the memory of General Grant. The idea is a good
one, but why say " in the north ? " I venture to prophoBy that
were Bu h a subrcription started, the proportion of subscribers
in the southern states would at least equal those in the north
ern. It is a narrow minded man, indeed, who thinks loyalty
to the union or admiration of General Grant is a muttor of ge
ography. Railroad contractors in Mexico have Bent to China for 8.000
coolies, and this is cited by some papers as showing that
our opposition to the admission of Chinese is foolish, since
Mexico raises no obje tion to them. This is about us goo 1 an
argument as can be given for chewing tobacco. There are
many other things Mexico does that it does not necessarily fol
low that we should do. We claim to be leading the procession,
not following it, and we certainly are not looking to Mexico for
lessons on political economy.
If the shade of Horace Greeley could look down upon White
law Reld's German castle, with its $10,000 granite portico,
there would not be stone enough In the entire structure to keep
him from turning over in his grave. The aping of nobility by
Americans whose wealth is founded upon the brains and toil of
some one else, U one of the undemocratic tendencies of the
times that make things look dark for genuine American prin
ciples. However, we have the satisfaction of knowing that the
pages of Amerlcun history will still bear the name of Horace
Greedy when the builder of Reld's Rhonlsh castle shall have
been forgotten.
One of the benefits of royalty was demonstrated In London
recently. Mrs. Mackay the alleged Amerlcun washerwoman
gave a concert in honor of the Princess Louise, who had the
exceedingly had manners to delay hor appearance until 11 :45.
Meanwhile the concert had made good progress, after tedious
waiting for the guest of the evening. The Princess requested
that the concert begin again, and as a royal request is equiva
lent to a command, it began again and did not end until 4:00
o'clock in the morning. In all the broad land of America tliero
probably does not dwell a woman who, under similar circum
stances, would have been so thoughtless and disregarded
of the comfort and pleasure of others, as well as the commonest
canons of good breeding as was this royal lady, to whom En
glish women are supposed to look for a pattern of ladyhood.
Marquise DeLeuville is doing his best to prove how fortu
nate a women Mrs. Leslie was in discovering his peculiarities
in time to avoid a marriage with him, His threat to come to
America and prosecute the press for slander, reminds me of
an incident that occurred in my native town. A lady-killing
clerk, whose meager salury was so completely consumed by
his livery and other society bills that those who supplied him
with the necessaries of life had great difficulty in securing their
pay, was requested by his washerwoman to pay his bill. Upon
his declining so to do she expressed her opinion of him in forc
ible Irish, In the presence of many amused sjiectators. " Don't
you call me such names as that, Mrs. O'Connor," he exclaimed,
"or I'll sue you for slander." "Huh I an will yez?" she
shouted in great wrath. " An will yes sue the hull town ? Ye'r
in the mouts of everybody." W.