THE MEDFORD DAHA' TRIBUNE. MEDFOIil), OltKdON. THURSDAY, OCTOHKIt 7, 1)0!).
6
An independent Millar.
i When Frederick built his fnmom
paln.ce of Sin is Soud there happened
;to lie a mill that greatly hampered hltu
In the execution of hla pinna, and he
Fkod tbo miller for how much he
would sell It. The miller replied that
for a long aeries of years his fa mil J
had owned the mill, which had passed
from father lo sou, and that he would
not sell It for tiny price. The kins
Bsed every solicitation, offered to build
hi in a mill In a liettcr place and pay
ihtm. besides, any sum he might tie
imanil, but (he obstinate miller mill per
sisted In his determination to preserve
the Inheritance of his ancestors.
Irritated at last by his conduct, the
'king sent for bim and said in au an
gry tone:
"Why do you refuse to sell your mill
notwithstanding all the advantage I
have offered you?"
The miller repented his reasons.
"Do you know." continued the king,
"that 1 could take It without giving
you a penny;"
"Yes." returned the miller calmly. "If
it were not for the chamber of Justice
at Berlin."
The king was so flattered by this an
swer, which chowed that he was Inca
pable of ni act of Injustice, that he
dismissed the miller without further
entreaty and changed the plan of bis
garden.
A Philosopher's Fable.
Arthur Aull Is responsible for this
one:
"Folly, Genius and Common Sense
once went walking and came to a
tream. Genius, having his head in
the clouds, naturally started to wade
across, paying no attention to the
depth. The waters soon went over his
head, and be was drowned. Common
Sense bunted for a safe way to get
across, and finally he found a foot log.
As he got out about the center of the
stream the log swayed, and be fell Into
the water and sank to rise no more.
'Folly stopped at the bank of the
stream to amuse himself by throwing
' pebbles Into the water and watching
the waves. He sat upon the moist,
cold bank until be caught a cold which
developed Into pneumonia, of which
be soon died. Moral. It doesn't make
ranch difference, after all. whether
you are a genius, a sage or a foot.
You'll get It sooner or later anyway."
Exchange.
' Told to Earn His Own Salary.
Commodore Vanderbllt discovered is
lames H. Itiitter. then in the employ
of the' Erie railroad, a man he believed
the freight department of the Central
needed, says the Baltimore News. It
Is related that some time after be took
charge of the Central's traffic office
Butt-.' called on the commodore te
submit a plan for Improvement. When
be bad stated the case the president
looked at him sharply and asked:
"nutier. what dues the' New York
Central pay you Slo.OOO a year for?"
The reply was. "For managing the
freight traffic department."
- And then the commodore said. "Well,
you don't eipect me to earn your sal
ary for you. do you?"
Rutter went out and carried through
his plan on bis own judgment. The re
sult was highly satisfactory. Rutter
became president of the Central.
(Up to Snuff,
i man in workman's garb one day
lied at n local dentist's, and the door
is opened by a maid.
.Vorkman Is the gent in that draws
!tb? ,
Servant No. sir. but I expect he will
be In shortly.
roTKm'an (pausing on doorstep)
tve gas?
Jmt he charge?"
lol
faollar! Do yon mean to
illow's got to swallow
f gas to have one
ith pulled out? Xo fear. I reckon
cQowffrfrjrTjWft It, for I work
jwn at the gas works myself. I'll
to another dentist and have it
pilled out without gas." Exchange.
Stumped.
oTytbingJiSuT? in !
Oregon we raise apples as big as your
id - --". 4 I I -v
IoLioLtoM pedtiMns Mill 1
, Uncle Phirr
Whjf-ef-abr't-Chlcago Tribunes .
rrggresa impeaea.
TFIrst Member-Mrs. De Streak didn't
hive her way at the dress reform taeet
1S (his afternoon, did she? Second
Member No; her. gown fitted bcr so
ut-'htly that she couldn't make a mo
t)o. ruck.
HhrtrbsWitrt- rm ego
ulUalot Is! When you are with him
pxneets von lo lip all ears. Slobbs
udarOT Bi
Nef- JfW;-ff :t-J' itilif Wettlzl o!
le tviie wituwfiirli Itsfihme Ts pn
1 on (he map of n railroad tbat doesn't
irs through It. Chicago Hecord-Ber-
d. ' J
Assist--i'oniiBiS iQ heuveu will
flst ."our-i.n't'ii'i i'roverb.
MwiBrHiaaumMii Htm maim ntwwiiimnr w. r
fYes."
v?rt
o?rlf)-eetVi
Ha Got tha Chair.
On a very hot afternoon a nunibe
of around town chaps who didn't seem
to have much to do were lounging la
the chairs in front of n lending hotel.
Several traveling men came out of the
hotel and. finding all of the chairs
occupied, looked and spoke things that
wouldn't go well In polite society.
"Let' dump a few of them out,"
suggested one.
"Hold on a minute." replied another.
"Watch me get n chair." With that
ho walked over to one of tho loungers
and In the most courteous way said.
"Will you please tell ine whether that
is a drug store across the street?"
"No," replied the louuger; "that's a
bank."
"Oh. Is It? Well, say. what Is that
nice big Imlldlii;: Just down the street
then1, two comers away?"
"Thi it's the ,Mstot!lce." was the re
ply. "You live In this charming city
then?" asked the drummer.
"I do," sal. I the lounger.
"Well, thru." replied the travellr
man. "I'm a guest at this hotel maI
paying for accommodations. Suppose
you get n-j and give me that chair."
He got the chair. Kausas City Journal.
Varieties of Humor.
The Temple of Art, devoted to that
peeullir form of entertainment yclw
"polite vaudeville," was crowded to
suffocation as Messrs. Biff and Bang,
the refined sketch team and sidewalk
conversationalists, stepped jauntily to
the footlights. Iu response to the deaf
ening applause Messrs. Biff and Bang
bowed coudesceudingly. as though It
hurt them.
Without further preliminary Mr.
Biff hit, bis partner on the rear of bis
ample trousers with a stuffed club,
remarking, "it's a wise man tbat
knows bis own mind."
And Mr. Bang, no!, to be outdone In
this little exchange of pleasantries,
promptly buried an ax in the skull of
Mr. Biff, remarking the while, "It's a
wise man that minds his own nose."
Whereupon the intelligent audience
screamed with delight and voted Biff
and Bang the best ever. "And yet
they were a frost in the Londou
balls," commented a man in the front
row. "The English have no apprecia
tion of real humor." Philadelphia
Ledger.
A Happy Compromise.
"What a beautiful little baby be is!"
exclaimed the neighbor who had
called. "Ht isn't six months old yet.
either." said the proud youug mother,
"and he weighs over twenty pounds."
"What have you named him';"
"Well." hesitated the mother. "Henry
and 1 U Tie red a little about that. He
wanted to give him one name, and I
wanted to give him another, but we
finally compromised and agreed to call
bim John Wesley."
"I see. You named bim after the
great founder of Sletu','
"No. indeed."- qnickly interrupted the
mother. "Tbat name, as I said, is a
compromise."
"But bow?"
"The 'John' Is for John Calvin, and
the 'Wesley is for John Wesley."
"Oh, 1 see." Youth's Companion.
Queer Claret.
A party of miners calling at an Inn
In Llangollen during the absence of
the landlord were shown Into the best
room, whic-b. on bis return, caused bim
to remonstrate. His wife, however,
explained tbat a lot of money bad
been spent and tbat seven bottles of
claret had already been drunk.
"Claret!" said be. "Why, 1 sold the
last bottle the other day. You've been
giving 'em catchup." From "Random
Recollections Of a Commercial Trav
eler." .
Property
At A Bargain
e have three acres, just out-'
side the city limits, platted all
'jfjutit j, with a new five-room.
house, which we consider a bar-
$2200
The property faces on two-
id would subdivide nicely.
Thero is an electric motor and
Jjunyi which goes with the place.
j the well would supply water
I'lrrigating.
'IBio owner has made the price
luubun order to sen quicniy, uuu
the property will be on the mnr
"keTfnTI VsniTfime nt this price.
Wf.fYofl('6 Co.
Not Interacted.
"I have called." said the hook agent,
"to see If I can Interest you In a little
work"
"Young man." snapped the woman
who tinswcred tho door. -"Just now I
n m Intel ested 111 washing uiy dishes,
il listing, cleaning up after tlie paper
hanger, mailing six beds, polishing tho
hardwood Moors. Ironing my husband's
shirts, getting two more meals today,
ilarnlng nine pairs of stockings and
stringing my sweet polls, mid 1 might
say that that's more work than yon
men ever thi ught of doing. .No; you
.an't Interest me In any more." De
troit Free Press.
Getting an Early Start.
"Father, what do you wish mo to
ti' when t grow up?"
"The same as I am. my son-a law
for." Then Instead of wasting any more
Ir.ie on arithmetic, geography mid
flich trii'-k I'd better be getting nt the
lypothetlenl question, hadn't It"
ludce.
Well Known Hotel Keeper Uses and
Recommends Chamberlain's
Colic, Cholera and Diar
rhoea Remedy.
"I tuko pleasure in saying that T
h:vo kept Cliiimherliiin's Colic, Chol
era and Diarrhoen Remedy in my
family medieiuo chest for about 15
years, nnd have always hud satisfac
tory results from its use. I havo ad
ministered if to a jircnt many trav
eling men who were suffering from
t-oubles for which it is reeonmipndcd.
and have never failed to relieve,"
says J. C. Jenkins of Glasgow, Ky.
This remedy is for sale by Leon B.
llaskins' pharmacy.
We ara Grower-Buy direct from tn
NO A O K N TS , ,
Our Trvrm are cmwu uirtly
WITHOUT IRRIGATION
Writ for fre catalog. Lance tofk of
TrieUe-ultb)e for commercial orchni
Choict Fruit, Nut and Ornimtntil Trw, Grip
Vinet, Snull Frort PUntt and Shrobturr
The Dalles Nurbkuikb
Main Office. lZtf Grand Ave,lDti.wi,Ore.
4
ATTENTION
Those who are looking for good invest
ments can do no better than to inves
tigate this beautiful property
Twenty-eight fine lots located on Main street, six
blocks west of the business district. Main street is be
ing paved, water mains are being laid, sewer is in, ce
ment walks going in, cross street 60 feet -wide. Lots
are 50x137, front lots 70x140. Always accessible, either
l
on foot or wheel on account of paved streets. Building
line 25 feet from front of lots.
, There is no question but what one will make 50 to
100 per cent on the investment in the course of a year.
Medford is growing very rapidly and without question
this is the cheapest property within the same radius
of anything in the city today. The price and the terms
are reasonable. Come and look this over and be con
vinced. We also have a splendid business property, of large
size, that will stand investigation. The present price
will look cheap in a year's time.
Also have 40 acres first-class fruit land that can
be traded for city property. This is some distance out,
well located, easily cleared and no waste or steep land.
Now what have you to offer 1
J. W. Dress er Agency
West Main St.
P. C. Hansen. Tom Moffat.
We make any kind and style of windows. We carry
glass of any size on hand.
Mprlfntvl nsh Sc Door Co.
4wW8!flEaW3MaWlWnBMW
Herman ltros., tho middlu nnd har
ness makers, desire to ntniotmou to
the trtido llint they nro not only pre
pared (o fill all orders nt hhort no
tice, hut curry the wont complete line
of harness, saddles, bridles, whips,
robes, lilatiketH, wugoti covers, twits,
etc., that eiin he found in southern
Oregon at prires that cannot fail to
plea so when quality of stock and
workmanship is considered. Don't
forget the plnco, 317 K. Seventh
street, Medt'ord. '
Yes; tho oilier fellow rend this, o
did his wife. Moral Advertise. V.
More Than Enough Is Too Much.
To maintain health, a mature man
or woman needs just enough food I"
repair the waste mid supply energy
nod body heat. The habitual con
sumption of more food Hum 'is nec
essary for these purposes is the
prime cause of fctomnch troubles,
rheumatism ami disorders of the Kid
neys. If troubled with indigestion,
revise your diet, let reason mid not
appetite control nnd take a few doSwn
of Chamberlain's Stomach and Liver
Tablets and yon will soon he all right
again. For sale by I.eoii 1!. llaskins'
pharmacy. ,
SOUTHERN OREGON
EMPLOYMENT AGENCY
WANTED Three girls for gen
eral housework; good wnges.
MALE AND FEMALE
HELP FURNISHED TO
EMPLOYERS FREE.
Office
33 SOUTH FRONT STREET.
PHONE NO. MAIN 3351.
t
t ., . ,. .. .. . n I
t ... .:r i
I '.1
J Mr. Investor Havo you been
spniio ami cost of lour rooms;
i nnu uresscrs; cnmiici Kiicnun.
J. A. MflNTOSIl, Archifct't,
Third Floor Medford National Bank Hiiilding.
' XJJU II I-1V'.'L illl UlUiU
r
t Medford Iron Works I
E. G. TROWBRIDGE, Proprietor. t
I Foundry and Machinist
All Hrn" of Enylnes, Spraying Outfits, Pumps, Boilers and Ma-7
chlncry. Agents In Southern Oregon for 7
t FAIRBANKS, M0PSE & CO. t
Oregon Calls-
"More People"
Pass tho word to your relatives nnd friends to como now.
Low Colonist Rates
To Oregon will prcvnil from tho East
SEPTEMBER IS TO OCTOBER 15
via tho
Oregon Railroad Navigation Co.
Southern Pacific
.'. t (LINKS .IN OHEOON) .
From Chicago $33.00
From St. Louis $32.00 . ,
From Omaha . ,$25.00 .
From St. Paul $25.00.V
From Kansas City $25.00
Deposit tho mnoiint of tho faro wilh tha nnnrcst 0. It. & N. or S. P.
Aent find ticket will ho delivered in tho Hunt without extra 'cost.
Send im the nnnie nnd address of anyono interested in tho Slato for
Oregon literature,
WM. McMURRAY,
flenernl FnKseutfer Agent,
Portland, Or.
T
tho modern homo seven rooms In the T
Inclcss refrluerntor, hullt-ln buffets t
.lflll'MIIII IfllllVlllli
RESOLVED .
The he-it renolution for yon
(o make ix to eomo to tin for
ynnr nnxt anil, if yo.i wnnt
Hoinclhintf "'it of (ho orilinary.
Wo lo the lieht wt.rk nnil rlinn;j
Ihu lownst prit'CH.
W. W. EIFERT
THE l'ROGIlfcSSIVE TAILOR