MEDFORD DAILY TRIBUNE, M ED FORD. OREGON, frTgn A v SEPTEMBER 22, 1008.
m.'-: .
SELF EVIDENT.
What th Man Wanted Whan Ha Got
In tha Barber's Chair.
The bald headed man with four days'
growth of beard on his chin gitered
the barber's shop and sat down In oi
of the operating chairs.
"Shave, sir?"
growled the man 1 IM tils
I want to be mean-4 a .fct
Cl'it!lS."
"This isn't a tailor r.w
.What is it':'
"It's a barber shop."
"ViUat work do you do iu t's t&Y'
"tih.ive uieu and. cut their hair, sir."
LK you think a mau with no hair on
his head would come here to have his
hair cut:"
"No, sir."
"Then, presuming me to be a snue
man, but baldheaded. what would you
naturally suppose I came for?
"For n shave."
"Then why did you ak me If
I v.a;;teU a shave when I took a seat
In yrwir chair? Why didn't you po to
work at or.ee? If some of you barbers
wii:.J cultivate a habit of Inferring
from easily cseertiilued dr.ia, instead
of developing such wonderful conver
sational p.nvers. it would I of mate
rial aid In advancing you in your
chosen vocation and of expanding
jov.r promts. Vo yon comprehend'''
"Yes. sir." replied the man as he !e
grn to lnth?r the customer's face In a
dazed sort of way. And he never even
asked him If he wanted 1-rUllniitiiie on
when the o;kthUou was performed.
Social aM Personal iCIassified Advertisements
EPICURES STUDY HOTELS.
Then They Go One Place or Another,
as Fancy Dictates.
Kplcures accustomed to dining In ho
tels nnd restaurants study the policy
of each fashionable, place und readily
tell Just why they go to one place or
avoid another. They have their likes
and dislikes, aside from actual eating,
regarding the waiters, the music, the
ventilation and a buudred and one
other things a casual visitor would
fail to appreciate.
For Instance, ut one restaurant only
single portions are served for one per
son. At another, where the cooking Is
equally good, half porttuns, nearly or
quite as large us the single portions of
other places, are Berved for one per
son. There wus a little dispute at a
well known hotel over a mistake In nn
order of trout and chk-keu that inude
a difference of several dollurs on
cheek for a rather simple dinner for
two. It was settled "out of court," us
It were, and quite agreeably, but bote
managers regret aud try to avoid these
nib takes, esieclally when the customer
Is a regular visitor, for they know he
never forgets the details of his eating
and Is slow to forgive au error.
Another peculiarity of diners is as to
the location of tables. Some persons
cling to one table aud feel aggrieved
wheu they find another In their favor
ite seat. Itcstauruut proprietors have
tried to understand this peculiarity of
their patrons, but have to admit they
fall to explain It. St Louis ICepubUe
Why Naval Uniforms Are Blue.
Naval uniforms all the world over
pretty well are navy blue. The Hilt
isb fashion In this matter has been the
rule with maritime people In general
That blue was ever selected for the
king's naval service was a fortuitous
happening. When lu 1747 the ques
tion of uniform was being considered
the color selected had very like t
bare been Trench gray laced with sil
ver. While the king was still not
quite decided he saw the iHichess of
Bedford in a riding habit of htm'
faced with white aud enlivened with
gold lace. It was a revelation. lien
the king declared, was the uniform fm
bis sea service otlicers. and no inmv
was heard of French gray. The navy
took to blue, and every other navy has
taken to It since. Tall Mall (iazttc.
A Reasonable Translation.
The teacher was telling the das- In
fourth grade geography ntiit the great
seals of the different states, u-lnp the
pictures In the dictionary ns the bisls
of the lesson. Pointing to the seal of
Virginia, she asked:
"Now, w ho ca n tell me f r in t Ii H
picture what should 1k the inenidug
of these Latin words: 'Sic semper
tyrannlHT "
Hobby's hand went up.
"All right. Hobby; ynu may tell u "
"'Take your fml off my ne-k,' " wn
Bobby's reply. Judge.
Tit For Tat.
The Jaimuese do nut tike to 1 c.i !!.-.)
Japs. A noted diplomat was travellnc
from Tokyo to Yokohama when :i
American In the ear leaned nem- and
said, "Say, what Vv' are you. I'lilne-e
or Japanese?"
Quick ns a fl;th mine In excellent
English. "May I Inquire umi 'Ley' are
you, Yankee or monkey?" I'hiiadel
phla Idger.
Rev. T. J. ;tttiit'y was a Medford
visitor i fore of the week. His
!)' :tlj-ovc.i by his
Cint.t es
cit.we w4 lM s
tvilst e4 ip rp
f I'" r.
U M im S4S
arly tyi v I
bal taita m Jaaa ft. ttst'ia
J: kville trns4S'-t4 ' 44
for ft.. lay ) .rnii.
Joseph t tnev, a tl k;r
(.rant I 'a as, was in .Ti.-dfurd aud Jack
aoiiville Monday.
A number of the citizens of Medford
and vit'tnitv went to Ashland Monday
evening to listen to speech of Hon
Theodore A. Bell, California's gifted
orator. Tlo-y wi-re well pleaded with
his remarks and spak highly of his
oratorical abilities.
Your fuel bill will be cut in half if
you use a Cole's Original Air-Tight
Heater. Sold bv Medford Hardware
Co., successor to H. K. Boyden. 160
Thomas E. Hanimerslev, formerly ipf
Cold Hill, was on the southbound train
Mondav on his wav to Ashland on offi
rial lmnin-s. He is now connected with
the Tinted States marshal's office at
Portland.
Miss Dalia King, who is in charge of
the general delivery at the Medford
poftoffree. has gone to Shasta springs
to spend her vacation.
Mr. and Mrs. T. Norris of Jack
sonville were Medford visitors Mon
day.
J. A. Wetzel, who is now a resident
of Douglas county, is making Medford
a business visit.
One Cnt a Word No single Ineer
tions less than IS cents. Six insertions
for the price of four. Setenty-fiT
ra-s a Iuih per ioodUl.
FOB BAXlE.
AMUSEMENTS. f
4 4
At the Bijou.
The performance at the Hijou last
night took well before a large audience.
The rhiHS i'f pictures that are being
run at this theater are second to none
A inark-d improvement in the pictures
has been noted in the last month or so,
The fact is the film producers are turn
ing out a better clatn of pictures, and
the Biiou is running them as fast ns
thev are turned out.
One of tonight's pictures entitled
'Tie- tireat ritizen' Hank Kobberv.
is a thrilling reproduction nf that fi
mous holdup. The robbers gain ei
trance to the hank by cntt ing their
wav up through the floor. A fierce
fight takes place later with the sher
iff. " A Policeman for an Hour" i
one of the best laugh prpdueers ever
put on. " I he Hindoo King is a clever
illusion pirtto-r and lighly interesting.
A big performance billed tomorrow
night.
Bancroft Entertainment.
A highly appreciative audience greet
e.l r. Bancroft and M iss Lewis in
their opening niimbt-r, "lloodoos' at
the Angle opera Ionise hut night, and
listened to one of the best lectures ever
fehvered in this city. To say that
everyone plea--! would only lie
telling a half t rut h. They w.-re si in
ly delighted. IMh Ir. Bancroft and
Miss Lewis were in their best voice
:tnd their prelude of song and ii.iper
natimi captivated their audience ut
ice. Ir. Bancroft ' lecture entitled
II oih1 mom" was u masterpiece, and
was atteiitivclv listened to with breath
ss anticipation by his pleand hearers.
He explained heieniific ally a great
iiianv of man's superstition and ex
I the law pertaining to a great
niiioiint of mvxterious phenomena. )l-
lenioimt rated beyond all question his
materv of the science of the mind and
h remarks were a rvelatifn to many
ire-ent. As a popular scientific be
iinr lr. Bancroft i? the bet that ha"
visited this city, and it is n pleasure
and inspiration to ha e such talent
"it US.
Miss Lewis lias a nweet and well
traiinil voir and her imp-rsi. nation
Id miu h to the entertainment.
They will close their engagement in
this city this evening with "When.
Whom and Huff to Love," a laugh pro
lucer of the first magnitude, f )d bach
tors and maids sin mid be on hand.
Iont forg-t tonight, love." A large
audience i assured, and a gmul laugh
promised. Take your b.-st girl and
im whoii. whom and how tt live.
KoU SALK Why piy to .t o
for an ordinary lot, when you can buy '
i re of ground that wit support
9 family, planted to small fruit and ;
garden, for t'-, only one and one- j
half miles from postoffit-c; also two i
id five-acre tracts, all under irriga- !
tion, one quarter down, balance on i
easy terms, .lames Bowling, Keventh
and I streets. P. (). IVn M2. 16J
FUK WALK A four cylinder "Pacific"
automobile; will sell cheaji; will make
terms if desired. J. M. Koot k Son,
over Jackson Count r Bank. 167
FOR SALE Choice business property
on five years' time. Address Loek Box
-US, Medford. 162
FOR SALE Old papers, 5 cents a hun
dred. Tribune office. 160
FOR SALE Largest rooming house in
Medforu ; location unsurpassed ; genu
ine bargain for the right party; cash
proposition only. Address J. C, care
of Tribune. 175
FOR SALE 320-aere ranch, $12,000,
first class improvements, well, family
orchard, etc. This is a bargain. See
K E. W., Tribune office. tf
FOR SALE Five-acre tracts inside and
adjoining city limits of Medford, on
five years' time. Apply Gold Ray Real
ty Co., in office Condor Water k Pow
er C. 169
FOR SALE All my household furni
ture, cheap. H. V. Lumsden. 160
ANYBODY wishing a nice, new resi
lience property, 100x150 feet big, with
lawn, fruit and ornamental trees, Lo
gan and strawberries, modern in every
way ard located on the best street in
Medford, should address P. O. Box
572. 165
Misses' and
Infants' Headwear
It will be a pleasant and a delight for
the mothers to look through our fine as
sortment of Headwear for misses and in
fants. The new and novel up-to-date
styles are here in all colors and white in
silk, felt, bearskin, knit and embroidered
effects. Every price a low one.
25c and to $3.00
BAKER-HUTCHASON CO.
Fine Millinery
Special Orders Taken
Our Millinery Department is gaining
many friends and principally from the
fact that wc are turning out Hats that
.are just as good and of the same mate
rials as many sold in this section of the
country for about double our price. Visit
our millinery department and examine
the values at
$2.50 and to $50.00
Medfords High Class Ladies Apparel Store
Central Ave., just North of Jackson Co. Bank
FOR SALE Dry cord wood, pine, fir,
oak aud laurel. F, Osenhrugge, Stude
baker Bros warehouse.
FOR SALE A good small business on
Seventh street. Reasons for celling.
Address, P. O. box 512 or call at this
office. tf
FOR SALE; A first-claas piaaola-pia-no:
a bargain. P. O. Box 95, Med
ford.
Fuli SALE Dry cord wood, pine, fir,
oak and laurel. F. Osenbrugge, Stude
bakir lima. Co. warehouse. 163
FOR SA LE Improved or unimproved
eitv luts, 5 aud 10 acre Mocks, near
city; orchards and farm lands. V. M.
French, over Jackson County bank, 179
FOR SALE Dry oak stove and cord
wool. Apply Hotel Nash. 178
WANTED.
WANTED Girl f.r general housework;
family uf two; ea-sy work; guod wages.
Writ.- A. R. Tribune, Medford. 170
WANTED II.ts. s f-r
month; no wire fence
and j;riis. Apply tu
I'tjoenix, ( r.
pasture, i- pt-r
t; shade, water
Walter Moore.
Q. M. JONES,
City Scavenger.
Garbage of all kinds removed oa short
ootlee. Leav order with chief
police.
BALL k OLOSCOCK,
Contractors and Banders.
All Work Guaranteed.
Oific vfth 0. H. Pierc k Sou.
Phone 653. P.Q. Box 7L ,
Prepaid Railroad Orders.
"Something which is of considerable
interest to the public goneralJv an,d
which is perhaps not generally knewn
is the system of prepaid o id era now is I
effect between stations of the Southern
Pacific com pa ay and ftU points in the '
L nited States. By means of this system
tickets may be purchased at Medford
from any place in the United States and
mailed or telegraphed direct to ths
party wishing to come here. Sleeper
accommodations and small amounts of
cash in connection with these tickets
may also be forwarded at the same
time." tf
WANTED Position on ranch fur man
and Wile; experienced iu all branches
of fanning. Ch.I.s Et-r, Medford,
or. 1U3
Tha Eatttrn Qutition,
"Paw, have you evi-r Utn euMt?'
"Yes. 1 sjn'tit a yir In New York
City when f was tiprmUh'rnhly j outlier
than I aui now."
vteJi, wnat Is the eastern jut
Hon r "
im otiiy one 1 ever hennl was.
'How much 1 he worth T "-Chicago
Tribune.
Human Nature.
Take (be case of the fellow la the
next block. You have always com Id
red him uppish. lie has cmnlderei!
ytro uppish. One dsj you are Intro
duced, and then mob of you discovers
the other lo 1-e a pretty jrood sort. Ht.
J'aaJ PkmeeM'reiMi.
There are enough serlnus (hlnifn lo
We without coiiKidi-rli: vursvlf ob!
of them.- pa nic's f 'nleinlsr
Anybody wishing a sict, saw ri
iecee property, luoiI.'O feet big, with
lawn, fruit and orasmrntal trns, lo
gan and strawberries, modern in every
way and located on the best strait in
Medford, should address P. O. Hox
"2- 1C5
Mr. O". It. Curler, if l(f I10 ,lf
Medfnrd'a dentlsla, b-ft Monday after
uun mr nnoom mnly. 'ivlif.rni to
Kuvr nm jhitko aaniiar.vm.
VANTKI KipTietii'-l nuldle-aged
wuman to do cooking and general
huusrwork ; will pay good wages. Call
on Mrj. ( o.land. Talent, Or. 163
T Korthbtraad
Xo. 16Oncen Exprsai
Ko. H'PortUnd Ezpreu...
I Sontbbeiuul
Ezpreu. .
So. USm PruuUeo Exp..
Ko. MS'Prom Oruti Pan..
No.23For AjUnd
WANTKll Kirjt cla.M milk cow, rosh;
no w. rutin. Addrt-HK T, Tribune. Iti2
WA.N'TtD At once, a waitress at
Made bouse, Jacksonville. 160
"ANTK1 To trade, timber claim for
city proK-rty; Baker City property for
Mt-dford property; piano for good
borne. W. H. West.
WANTED Position in charge of fruit
rancb; recommendations furnished. H.
, care Tribune. 161
WANTED Three teams, work horses,
about one team ponie about
oOU; one team about 2300; must be in
good order and reasonable. W. II.
Wut A Co. tf
SII OK PKRFKCTIOX
So m.uiy of 1!;l' difccls in slim
milii a iin-.iKiii),' down ol l.nx
lots ami litcl loimlrrs, rii'iiiii.'
of stikliiiiK. etc.. wliii.li pruvc a
ctm-I.iiit Minrtv ol amioviuicv. as
Well as a detriment In iho sli..c.
rc-iiilt finiii lack of 'iovr alkn-
IllMI lo tlioucl.iilsof coiistruclion
is m.i.Ie with the mwt carvfu? vnr
tinv. It, miifnrm exrvlletuv of
sirtutiun uvlllt. vmi t-f i:s pt rkxtH-u,
Van Dyke
V ANTED To buy from 100 to 301
head of Uock sheen. Write Bo TO
iledrord, Or.
Medford Time Table
aOUTKEBN PAOIPIO EAXLWAV
6:S4 p. tru
9:49 a. m.
10:35 a. n.
3:20 p. m.
9:15 p. m.
10:15 p. m.
PAOTFIO BASTEBN RAILWAY
N'o. l.Leava. Kwiiord
No. 3jLaTa Madlord
No. SjArriTM UWord
No. 4ArrlTw Medford
8:10 a. m.
a.-M p. m.
10:21 s.m.
5:03 p. m.
BOOUB BT7EE T ALLEY RAILWAY
5o75JEeei
N'o. iiLearea
aIotorLaret
MoiorfLeaves
Ni. lJLeaTes
Ko. 3Leave
Motor jLeaTei
"SKdloTd
Medord
Medford
Mediord
Jacksonville..
JackjoeTille..
Jaekaoji villa. .
otorfL4Tfs Jacksoarills. .
10:45 a.m.
5:35 p. m.
2:00 p m.
9:00 p.m.
9:00 a. m. i
3i30 p. to. I
1 itO f. m. j
7:30 p.m.
roa bent.
ruli KENT Two h..us.s.
bilxt luildint;.
Call at Ei
lr)
'iO THADE Light single covered bug
gy lor two seated rig. L. E. V., Tn
bune office. tf
hordes,
carriage
E. H.
160
will:
h,MJe ;
KENT Stable fr two
bay b.ft and large
mutable fur iraraje.
awver. North C strn't.
tfDBlNESS CARDS.
COEV10 DURHAid7"
Attorners-atlsaw.
Qeo. H. Durham, Grants Pass, Ol.
ai. coivif. Medford, Or.
Medford Furniture Co, Undertaken
Day phoae 353; Ni;ht Fkonee: C. W
Coaklin .16; J. H. Btitler 1.
OO TO PR. OO&LB FOB 70 OB
OtASSES,
Optirad Psa-lor ia Perrr 'i Warehusne,
XEVE.NTH fTBCET.
"Be Raw Me Other
MAIL CLOSE !
" ptflr.;p.H.
Eale Point j 7:20 9:09
Hortkbound I 9iWl 4:fr4
rSoutkbouod 110.051 2:50
JedkaoxTfUe 100 5:20
FrMh Complexion
is usjciiad aad produced br
Rabertiaa. a mid. dsllihtful
prreeraUoa, drikateir fawmt.
09 Makes the skin eiquuitejy softi
' oanuAss eraexieo appearance eaond
bf over -dryness reduces the irse of
enlarged pores, cleanses them, re
duces inflammation and spreads an even,
radiant rlow due to wholesome nonrUk-
ment of ikin elands and ttimulatlasi oi
ths capillaries which also feed the
skin and supply its healthful color.
Aliftur Druniitfir m fm stmflt tf
OBERTINB
SB. WHY IS IT? W
That each month in all ihe best homes in this country, on
library table, and in every club reading room, you find the
It is because it keeps you in touch with those great public and
human movements on which the American family depends.
It is because its stories are the best published anywhere.
It is because its illustrations in color, and black and white, set
the standard.
It is because its articles are the most vital and interesting.
It is because there is something in each copy for every member
of every American family.
A YEAR'S FEAST
1800 Beautiful Illustrations. 1560 Pages of Reading Matter.
OJ Complete Stories. 75 Good Poems.
50 Timely and Important Articles.
1000 Paragraphs presenting the big news of the "World at Large."
IZU Humorous Contributions.
Wonderful Color Wert, presented in frontispieces, inserts and covers.
All Yours for One Year's Subscription to
THE METROPOLITAN MAGAZINE
Price SI.50 per Yenr or 13 Cents a C.py
m lor.iTAariTaNv0EEO0NIAN have maU a arrangement with
SSSSShf MAfZINE by vhich '""y to4 o offer the following ertra,
It . C0S' ' 0ne year ' ""fecription to THE METROPOLITAN Is 1.60.
Mk f? 160 bription to the SOUTHERN OREOON1AN i. $2.00. We offer
Reduced Bates to Livestock Show.
The Tacifie Nationn Fair and Lico
itock ihow will held in Portland
Stptember 21st to September 26th.
Round trip tickets will be sold at a
fare and a third for this event, tickets
being on sale September 21, (food to
return until September 27. Further par
ticular at the depot. 163
uoirroNi HOTEL
a ami. at a.
l"vr:e see nrtm
aVl.-l've teelmx Opomtiu Iimisbs.
X Ha?. f,-e Hour, 10 It. 14 P. M.
Wtion oilers fall, call on
rn. B 4. IUIIU,
lu?m riieuialist.
OOfftse in ll Qrarsl lw u. b.lai
ANGIE OPERA HOUSE
One Night,
Thursday, Sept. 24
Gorman's Comedy and V&adevlileCo.
Presenting the Side Splitting Comedy
" WHO l WHO"
0 Including 7 High Claw Vaudeville Acts
PRICffS 23, 35 AND 50c
I
I.IIL I I 111 1
PORTLAND
OREGON
SrKR Comport
HHKItATK 1'IUCKS
Country Club
and Live Stock SIiow
HliADQUARTERs
SoptonibiT 21-2li, VMS
IX roKTI.AXI)
A. 8. NOllTON. UsnsfW
I THE MEDFORD DAILY TRIBUNE HAS THE BES1
NEWS SERVICE IN SOUTHERN OREGON.
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