r
topics or
THE TIMES
Man ts nature's noblest work, but
he Is often easily worked.
Some beef is corned and much
more scot nod In these dsy of the boy
cott The world will never have a very
good opinion of a man who loafs In a
barber shop.
Once more It Is reported that Men
llk Is dead. He must have a many
lives as a cat
Professor Munsterberg says that In
this country the woman Is the head
of the house. Let's admit It and save
trouble.
There Is a tendency to-day to dis
cuss farming as a "serious proposi
tion." Few farmers have found It
humorous.
A New York actress has been ar
rested on a charge of stealing dia
monds. But possibly her press agent
can prove an alibi.
An expedition of Frenchmen has re
turned from the antractlo regions.
They deny Indignantly that they dis
covered any poles.
Mr. Roosevelt rode a camel In
Egypt He cculd have ridden two at
once, of course, had he desired to
startle the natives.
J. Pierpont Morgan goes In for old
masters, etc.. without counting the
cost, but it Is too much to believe
that he Intends buying a nobleman
for a sou-in-law.
Ex-Vice President Fairbanks says
war with Japan la Impossible. Ex
Secretary Shaw says It is Inevitable.
It would be hard to find a better
chance for an argument
A New York preacher Is afraid It
will soon be possible for people to se
cure divorces merely by telephoning
to Reno for them. A lot of other
people are busy wondering why he Is
afraid.
A Missouri man Is advertising for a
rife with "a ffood. wholesome smile."
Ladies who answer the advertisement
should be warned that It will be abso
lutely necessary for them to show him
the smile.
It is probable that as soon as the
Egyptians get time to think It over
thoroughly they will discover that
they knew it all along, but did not
have the courage to acknowledge it to
themselves.
The subjects of King George of
Greece recently greeted him with
storm of "iltos." It should be ex-
plained that a "zito" Is not at all like
a machete or a boomerang. The con
stitution Is to be revised, and their
storm of "zitos" Indicated that they
were glad.
"Preventive astronomy" is the apt
term that has been applied to the
work of certain Chinese officials who
are educating the people In regard to
Halley's comet To counteract super
stition In this way shows that a
knowledge of astronomy may be put
to a highly practical use.
Now It develops it was an office boy
who sold stock short and. wrecked the
Hocking pool. This recalls the New
Jersey's Senator's historic maid who
mailed compromising stock letters
wbieh the Senator had resolved to de
stroy, but had Inadvertently left on
the library table where letters were
usually put for the maid to mall.
These mistakes of underlings will hap
pen In the most carefully regulated
families and offices.
Hopkinson Smith, who laments the
disappearance of amenity and gentle
ness from the life of New York, has
Incidentally furnished a definition of a
gentleman" which may Interest many
who know one perfectly well when tbey
see him, but would perhaps be put to It
to describe his essential qualities in
words. Mr. Smith says that a gentlo
man Is clean, honest, courteous to wom
en, kind to children, respectful to old
see. considerate to the Door, and sym
pathetic toward the "under dog." With
the silent amendment that be should
be courteous to other men as well as
to women, this seems satisfactory.
A correspondent of the New York
Times finds new evidence of American
extravagance and wastefulness in the
articles which American families throw
away. He calls attention to the fact
that a Junk-dealer in New York pars
the city mora than seventeen hundred
dollars a week for the privilege of
taking what he pleases from the refuse
cows before they are towed to sea;
and that although se thus pays nearly
ninety thousand dollars a year, be re
ceives three hundred and fifty thou
sand for the Junk which he rescues
from the dump. The correspondent's
charge may be true, but his Illustra
tion does not prove it The value of
old tin cans, waste paper and the other
things which come from the garbage
heaps Is due to quantity and propin
quity. There are millions of the cans,
and in such a quantity they are sala
ble. The few cans an average family
collects are not worth the space they
occupy.
In accounting: for the high cost of
living Professor Laughlln of the Unl
terslty of Chicago mentioned several
factors excessive duties on raw ma
terial, desertion of the farms by
youth, abuse of combination, lack of
organisation union consumers, and
flagrant extravagance, public aud pri
vate. The censure of those who live
up to their Income, or beyond It, Who
ape the rich and give no thought to
old age or emergency, was not too se
vere in Professor Laughlln s able lec
ture. And nothing is more whole
some than his hope of "a new aristoc
racythe aristocracy of the simple
life" the aristocracy of men and
women who "pay less homage to gold
and more to the virtues of honesty and
right living." The gospel of the sim
ple life has lent Itself to satire ana
parody. It has encouraged fails and
posing, Insincere and costly experi
ments. But it will survive ridicule
and perversion. Extravagance is
folly, and simplicity does not mean
the giving up of such comforts aa are
necessary to cleanliness, to beauty, to
economy of effort The talk of "back
to nature" Is not all as rational as It
might be, but there Is a vital element
of truth In It. It is. Indeed, evidence
of a healthy reaction ngalust conges
tion, -whirl" and waste. As a writer
in the Atlantic points out. the same
forces which have produced the cost
of living problem will aid in Its solu
tion. "It seems Inevitable," as he
says, "that there should develop some
general conversion of material Into
mental wants, and a partial sulatltu
tlon of culture for wealth as a meas
ure of the value of the individual."
In fact ven the automobiles, clubs
and mechanical pleasures may con
tribute to the revival of slmpllcty and
love of nature. Suburban and rural
life has profited by the advance of
machinery, and the trolley has caused
a counter-drift to the open and free
spaces. Never was there more Inter
est among men of affairs than now in
country homes, outings, rural sur
roundings. Professor Laughlln's
aristocracy" is perhaps already In
process of creation.
AMBERGRIS TREASUSS.
Story or a S30.000 Lamp and oase-
! Aboal the Sabataa.
The story of how a Manchester
(N. H.) painter found In the St. Law
rence river a lump of graylsn suo-
stance weighing thirty-eight pounds.
and how he has discovered that the
solid fatty stuff is ambergls and Is
worth $30,000. recalls the nearest
thing to romance that ever entered
Into the lives of Gloucester snd New
Bedford whalers. In the old days when
American whalers dared every sea. It
was like a lottery. Once in a lifetime
yon might chance on the decaying
body of a whale, giving off an awful
smell, and Inside that whale would be
a fortune enough so that you would
never have to go to sea again. Charles
Reade, as far as we remember. Is the
only writer to introduce-ambergis Into
fiction. In "Love Me Little, Love Me
Long" David tells Miss Fountain how
"the skipper stuffed their noses snd
ears with cotton steeped in aromatic
vinegar, and they lighted short pipes
snd broached the brig upon the putres
cent monster and grappled to it: and
the skipper Jumped on It and drove
his spade (sharp steel) in behind the
whale's side fins."
It is a matter of record that not far
from the Windward Islands a Yankee
skipper in one of the bast old whaling
years did cut out of a whale 130
.pounds of ambergls, which was sold
for 500. The price quoted for many
years was $4 an ounce. Aniberg'u Is
often found floating on the sea, partlc
ularly off the coast of Brazil and of
Madagascar. The Bahamas send more
than any other source to market. The
stuff Is a secretion of the sperm whale
which dies of the disease producing
the perfume matter. Chemists find It
hard to account for the fact that the
smell of the dead whale Is so horrible
when the substance taken out Is valu
able only as a source of sweet smells
Brooklyn Eagle.
Kai a Parallel Caae,
Jokes on the doctor are tempting It
the doctor suffers no injustice from
them. He Is usually a good, as well
as a good-natured target for assorted
witticisms. A writer in the Argonaut
has recently related a variation of an
old Jest the victim of which Is the
medical man. Anions the patients In
a certain hospital there was one ills-
Dosed to take a dark view of his
chances for recovery.
"Cheer up, old man!" admonish
the youthful Intern attached to the
ward wherein the patient lay. "You
symptoms are Identical with thoxe of
mv own case four years ago. I was
lust as sick as you are. Look at rn
nnr"
The patient ran his eye over the phy
sician's stalwart frame.
"What doctor did you have?" be
finally asked, feebly.
A Boomerang;.
One of the officials of the Midland
railway, coming from . Oienwood
Bprlngs yesterday, was telling a young
woman on the train how wonderfully
productive Colorado's Irrigated ground
Is.
"Really," be explained, "It's so rich
that girls who walk on It have big
feet. It Just simply makes their feet
grow."
"Huh," was the young woman's re
Joinder, "some of the Colorado men
must have been going around walking
on their heads." Denver Post
The Bounce Diplomatic.
"I can't get along wltn that wok."
"But have you tried diplomacy, my
dearr
"I have. To-day I handed the minx
her passports." Louisville Courier
Journal. And money Is also the root of many
a family tree.
She Ml..e4 "'
She Ha UIBexra.
The Dyson glr's." as Uulverton ex
pressed It. "all amounted to
thlug; they had fnculty-xcept. of
course." It usually added, with an In
dulgent smile, "Miss Vluulu. 8h
didn't seem to lane auer me sy
somehow. She did her best; sue nev
er shirked; but Lavlnla Dysons best
friend could scarcely maintain mav
site was capable."
She was gone now, and wo genue.
Indecisive, fluttering hands nan uw
mora tasks to do. The other Dyson
girls elderly women all, but still girls
In Dulverton (Wrlance sal tooony i
the sunny parlor. In a couipaulouable
rh with her task.
They were busy women, semora iuiu
even for a moment. m ni"
was a leader In church work; Niss
Pamella was a notable housewiro. ami
took orders for special kinds of pre
serves and cakes and pickles; Miss
Anne had worked her way through col
leire. and was a teacher In the high
school; Amanda, the Widow Cole, bad
done her duty by threo children of
her own and a half doxen stepchildren
before she Joined her sisters in the old
homestead.
Abruptly XIIss Lucretla laid dowu
her scissors. "I don't believe any one
of us would have been missed so
much." she said. "It s I'm ashamed
to soy It's coming to me aa a surprise,
W knew what Vinnlo was; we knew
what she meant at borne, and, thank
heaven! we loved her for It, and she
knew we did; but I never even
guessed what she meant to other peo
ple.
The things that everybody is say
Ing the people who stop me In the
rvet--" She broke off to master her
voice, and flnlshed with a sudden lit-
tlo sobblnt laugh of pride: "Vlnnle
was an Influence In the community
And how amaxed she would have been
If any one had told her so!"
"I know! I know!" assented Miss
Ann. "I'm finding It out, too; ami
I've been trying to make out Just how
It was. She didn't do much or say
much. even, but she was always so
friendly; and she always took It for
granted everybody wanted to do the
best thins the best way she never
wasted time or strength on worries
or resentments, or suspicions, or pet
tlnesses. Peoplo were somehow
ashamed not to behave the way she
expected them to."
"Yes." agreed Miss Lurretla. 'and
then they liked her so much; nobody
could helo that, and of course that
made them want to do what she want
ed. She was always so pleasant!"
My girls adored her; they thought
there was nobody with such ways snd
manners as Aunty Vlnnle." murmured
Amanda, "Young people never seemed
to feel the bar of age with her; she
seemed so happy,"
"Ah, that was It!" cried Miss Anne
I think it was her wsy of gathering
brightness, and passing It on. Seemed
hanov she was happy! She dlilnt
need to do things Ilk the rest of us
She lust shone! No wonder she's
missed; It's like losing sunshine."
"'A single sunbenm,'" quoted Mls
Lurretla. softly, from her favorite
Saint Francis, "Van disperse many
shadows.'" Youth's Companion.
The Audubon Society hss an uncon
scious branch In Tibet, or one may
say, since such compassion exists In
that distant country, that a similar In
fluenee is unnecessary. In Sven Hedln's
"Trans-Himalaya" the traveler speaks
of the sorrow of Oang (lye, the son of
the Governor of Saks-Dzong, when
one of the caravan shot a wild goose,
He wat quite overcome at this brutal
murder, and could not conceive bow
the servant could be so heartless and
cruel.
"You are right," I answered. "I am
myself sorry for the wild geese. But
you unit remember that we are trav
elers, and dependent for our livelihood
on what the country yields. Often th
chase and fishing art our only re
sources."
"In this district you have plenty of
theop."
"Is It not Just as wrong to kill sheep
and eat their flesh V
"No!" he exclaimed, with passionate
decision. "That Is quits another mat
ter. You will surely not compare sheep
to wild geese. There is as much dif
ference between them as between sheep
and human beings. For, like human
beings, the wild geese marry and have
families. And If you sever such
union by a thoughtless shot, you cause
sorrow and misery.
"The goose which has Just been be
reaved of her mate will seek him
fruitlessly by day and night, and will
never leave the place where he has
been murdered. Her life will be empty
and forlorn, and she will never enter
upon a new union, but will remain a
widow, and will soon die of grief, A
woman cannot mourn more deeply
than she will, and the man who has
caused such sorrow draws down a pun
lbhment on himself."
I had heard In the Lob country slm
Mar tales of the sorrow of the swans
when their union was dissolved by
death. It was moving to witness (Jung
uyes tenderness and great sympathy
for the wild geeBe, and I felt the deep
est sympathy for hlrn. Many a noble
and sensitive heart beats In the cold
and desolate valleys of Tlbitt
Going to school Anally becomes
habit. Many a young man continues
in school long after be should be at
work.
Some of our first Impressions were
made by mother's slipper.
ij TIBETAN SENSIBILITY.
Taat MUdle Hra Itrew.
High up In " d '""' ,u
Inserted for ages or more.
Tripped a y young "
husband).
To eplr the ancient lor,
The old. old books, from tneir
aklns .
Peered at them. they passe
While she viewed herself In mirror,
v. t.i.-h munv bride danced.
Way back In a corner, standing alone,
Thickly covered oer win u .
Stood an old mahogany bureau.
Smelting f rose leaves and must.
Toward this the bride now wended hr
way. , ,
And said, "My, what a pity!
We'll have this all done over, dear
vv.'ll send II to th city-"
.... . j .... ,irnwr. in turn.
-..llfi,.l at me ansa,
laces.
nut
vhen Into th
middle on sh
ItH'kcd
A huittf.. cam oVr their faces.
There were lUlnty shoes of every hue.
And tiny stocking of lac.
I.litla kit and uciiiirs and dresses.
Causing tinrs to roll down hr face.
For on each and every article
th found tbo name of the lime
Who Inst wore the treasurwi nainu.
And from a mother's srms had flown.
In the heart of each fond motnor
There's a middle bureau orawsr.
Where reposes dainty treason.
Noma of them worn and tor.
Little alws. ull sidled and worn at lh
side;
Uitla I. U s. all stained and wet
rtut thore arm I any treasures iisa
them.
At least I've not found them yet
Th r'vmlala Hall.
The relation between th coat of llv
in. .n.i the activity in the Issuance of
marriage license Is rcognld as Inti
mate, sven though the economists may
not be able to express the subtle fact
In a mathematical formula But there
can be no doubt that Cupid keeps an
eye on the market prices of provislua,
even though he may havs little us for
th tailor.
There can he no doubt that this
sprightly promoter of felicity has
sbanduned the old fallacy, enticing
but Illusory, that two person can live
Just as cheaply a can one Perhaps
that untruth In domestic mathematics
took form at a time when girls wsrs
different In me material respects
from the maidens of lo-day. It was
once th fad that they should be dell
cats, without appetite, taking food
after the manner of bird, with anae
mic result. They were more fond of
cakes and sweetmeats than of prosaic
bread, pulsions and roast beef: In
those days there might b mors ecoo
omy In th feminine menu. But th
girl of today Is brought up to b
buxom and robust. There has been
a reaction, both sensible and wide
spread. She tekes proper pride fn hr
appetite and In her muscles, which
she ha learned are not at all tncon
slstent with gentle sentiment. She
emulates her bothers In fondness for
the ojwii air and for suitable athletics
Thore Is no longer any reason for
her sentlmal semlstarvatlon. If she
likes a ballad to her eyebrow, she ts
ready also for a lobater after the
opera. She may approve of kisses
from the one right man, but he must
also be able to provide a menu more
extended than bread and cheese
Hence the normal and active feminine
Internet In the revolt against high
prices In the market place. Washing
on Post
l.ahor Mils.
If a gloss Is desired on linen, add a
teaspootiful of suit to starch when
making
In ironing handkerchiefs, It Is wall
to begin at the center; If ono Irons
the hem first, the middle will have ft
tendency to Inline or "full."
Few know t tint a cold bolted potato
rubbed on a piece of paper for t f
minutes will form a moisture of th
eonalstency of glue, and Is a satisfac
tory substitute for iiuclluge In case of
an emergetiry.
I'liltiaals Coeteme.
for lute
spring and summer Is shown In this
one of white and dark blue foulard
which has a slightly trained plain
skirt over which falls a belUid polo
naise of the same rnatnrlul, widely
fOBa ,
A useful llttlu costume
handed with dark bin stl. overlap
ping at the pointed tide and Pif
;nly fastened with tiny button, cov
ered with blue satin. i -
the waist line Is rtmnnwi oy a s-
of the satin, and IU mi "
ders elongate Into siew
tshed with satin cuffs snd are trimmed
with a frilling otimroiderwi m
tin similar to that finishing th low-
cut neck, wnite sua i.". -. .- -
.i..M.t with dark blue ana a om .
trimmed with while lace and plumes
repeat rh color scheme of we inw.
fad end fl5ics
inSrcxr
Collar and cuff seta are once more
In favor.
Three piece suits of foulard are an
extreme novelty.
Narrow skirts Increase In favor, el
though plaited shirts are popular.
I.cotrtped dimities mad over wl
ored slip or petticoat ar quit nw
The stripes are sufficiently wide to
permit th underneath color to snow
throng Such drease nd IHI O'
no trimming and style are xirnrly
plain
Lr scarfs w fast taking th place
of rhlffon and rrepa d chin a an
evening headdress Th lace ar fre
gll and show th arrangement of ths
rolflur beneath. The scarfs are mad
long, but ar not tied, a they drap
prettily.
A new edged batiste, showing
niain border one and a naif iBn
Id. Is mad In plaited styi wttn in
of
Of
STRAWS OF LATEST FATTER.
Hsr are two of Urn good new niudrla In rough stiaw. ItlbUii plays a
largi part In the trimming of on of thm, and lh band almttt th crowa
Is Lstooned with a wrth of tiny r, The oilier hat Is turned up sharply
at on side, and Its trimming savors of the chantecler.
border as a piping, not a hand. Th
fft I charming, aa the edging Is
a plain color snd delineates any good
feature of thn drc.
The leather colored linen Is made
Into a suit of tallurd fratum, with
the Jacket front widely separated to
reveal a double ruffl of soft whit
mull. Th hat Is burnt onhr straw
rtth trimming of black taffeta silk
and stiff black algret.
A smart spring hat Is In biscuit-
colored fine straw, with a big bow of
many loop of black tultn set rather
toward the back and felting a great
cluster of purple and greon leave
The violets and leaves are of satin, suf
ficiently bright In hu not to be com
pletely dulled by the tulle,
Soft-thread tatting, set In soft mt
cellars, Is used In attractive neck
wear. A ready-made tatting, resem
bling thn hand mado variety, serves
very well. Among the dp tare col
lars which encircle the neck ts a
round one made of mull, finely plaited
and Inset with leaves, tendrils and
flowers of Irish crochet. There Is
sufficient weight In the appl!iud
trimming to hold the wehllke collar
In place.
Te Wear la th Hal.
"A pretty luilr novelty Is a band of
grdt: embroidered In delicate silk, says
Mine, lltche In th Woman's Home
Companion, "sometime pink, some
times blue, but always In tb same
color ss th gown with which It ts to
be worn. This band Is long enough
to run from ear to ear across the soft
low pompadour which la now the
vogue. Fancy buckles and sometimes
embroidered butlons finish both ends
Under these, hairpin are fastened to
hold ths band In lis proper place."
War l Waallaar.
Borne women foolishly think It ft l
fleolton on their generosity to be care
ful about thn little things, while other
women economize unwisely.
Instead of making the pot full of
weak tea for the sake of economy, or
df strong tea for th sake of being con
sldurd generous, and throwing away
half of It In either case, measure both
tea and water and make enough good
tea so that It Is practically all used
Never mnre a IiIt flro when light
on Is sufficient, In cooking with go
I or oil, turn off 4ha heat a soon a
through with it; if water It to be
beatud, do not heat mors or hotter
than dslrd, I knew a worn.. .
-. w, ,q Mtna o( allots--
and bookkeeping tu keep ilowt Uu))
Ing espensna, who hr tim .
day heat a. tiug kettl of ,iTz
i. i.u . .
nnr v(m evfn ih iii pulling Mm
for the dish washing and th.
about halt of It after it Is ivi(k
a usamo lemporeturv. III SIM
enough In fuel to buy th fruit let
other dainties of which she )
nr ramiiy. in orjcr 10 aep ettkn
nr allowance.
tMrv all th left over, hut mx
Is them simply. Un woman
tak th good bits of meat that in
left. little stock, a stir of stab trait
and an egg, aud provide a d.llrkm
meat tours for (he family lunrk)
from materials, with Hie irptlot st
the tMt, that were In themselves
I. Another woman will at
throw out h lefumre AaW
put them on the tabu in their ts.
palatable condition, until th ftMUl
at them In deaperwtlon. Of thsy W
com totally useless. And yt aeotkar
ur unlimited nw material te est,
real th old. thus spending meek
save a little.
to-bee Was Stale.
It srrns to be pretty wll fU
It.hod that originally the mattan at
relationship and dri. along ttk
alt thst fallowed. ! dtmtB4
through th female lln. Kinship, svi
thtfor. property, was governed kj
th mother Hence tb puwr of U
early woman. When a young worn
gut married she k her hmbaxl
horn wlh her, and If h prov4 .
worthy II "as within hsr power t
cast him out. Th woman was Ik
-bee,- and hS) sh Said ) I
had to gel out. It Is comparative!
1st In the history of Human society
thai w first e the change from te
mal to ml liedhtp In th matter
of kinship and Inheritance ami In lbs
eonntiiht transfer of the power and
Importance fiom I he woman to the
man, i'hlcagn Ktamlner.
ftavellr la Trtmatlaa.
AM
Ribbon, which Utke such promi
1 -vSyril W
-al -V. .-' WW
nent place In millinery thl season,
la the most practical of trimmings.
When used In a Inrge, fiat loose bow,
with compact tittle wreaths) of small
flower, It I most charming In effect
Aa laslaaallea.
Ethel (confidentially) Do you
know, Clara, that I had two offer ol
marriage last weekT
Clara (with enthusiasm) Oh, I n
delighted, doarl Then the report If
really true that your uncle loft you
his money T Pick Me Vp.
Bilk Shnal Match.
Where silk liosu are rubbed Into
holes In the bark by tow shoes or
pump, It I usually usules to darn
them In thn ordinary way, Place ft
piece of silk of the same color un
derneath and darn ths stockings to It
lllasj It Os,
. The young, Inexperienced wlf wat
In tear. "Just think, mamma," she
sobbed. "Henry threw ft biscuit at
ma, One I mndo myself, too." "Th
montturt' erlnd her mother, "He might
have killed you," Loudon Newt.