r
TOPICS OF
t THE TIMES
Man t nature's noblest work, but
he Is often easily worked.
Some beef is corned and much
more scorned tn these days of the boy
cott The world will never have a very
good opinion of a man who loafs In
barber shop.
Once more It Is reported that Mens
Ilk is dead. He must have as many
live as a cat.
Trofessor Munsterherg says that in
this country the woman is the head
of the house. Let's admit it and save
trouble.
There is a tendency to-day to dis
cuss farming as a "serious proposi
tion." Few farmers have found it
humorous.
A New York actress has been ar
rested on a charge of stealing dia
monds. But possibly her press agent
can prove an alibi.
An expedition of Frenchmen has re
turned from the antractlc regions.
They deny Indignantly that they dis
covered any poles.
Mr. Roosevelt rode a camel tn
Egypt He cculd have ridden two at
once, of course, had he desired to
turtle the natives.
J. Plerpont Morgan goes in for old
masters, etc., without counting the
coat, but it is too much to believe
that he intends buying a nobleman
for a son-in-law.
Ex-Vice President Fairbanks says
war with Japan is impossible, Ex
Secretary Shaw says it is inevitable.
It would be hard to find a better
chance for an argument
A New York preacher is afraid It
will soon be possible for people to se
cure divorces merely by telephoning
to Reno for them. A lot of other
people are busy wondering why he is
afraid.
A Missouri man is advertising for a
wife with "a good, wholesome smile."
Ladles who answer the advertisement
should be warned that it will be abso
lutely necessary for them to show him
" the smile.
It Is probable that as soon as the
Egyptians get time to think it over
thoroughly they will discover that
they knew it all along, but did not
have the courage to acknowledge it to
themselves.
The subjects of King George of
Greece recently greeted him with a
storm of "xltos." It should be ex
plained that a "zlto" is not at all like
a machete or a boomerang. The con
stitution Is to be revised, and their
storm of "xltoa" indicated that they
were glad.
"Preventive astronomy" is the apt
term that has been applied to the
work of certain Chinese officials who
are educating the people in regard to
Halley's comet To counteract super
stition In this way shows that a
knowledge of astronomy may be put
to a highly practical nse.
Now it develops it was aa office boy
who sold stock short and. wrecked the
Hocking pool. This recalls the New
Jersey's Senator's historic maid who
mailed compromising stock letters
which the Senator had resolved to de
stroy, but had inadvertently left on
the library table where letters were
usually put for the maid to mall
These mistakes of underlings will hap
pen in the most carefully regulated
families and offices.
Hopklnson Smith, who laments the
disappearance of amenity and gentle
ness from the life of New York, has
Incidentally furnished a definition of a
'gentleman" which may Interest many
who know one perfectly well when they
see him, but would perhaps be put to It
to describe his essential qualities in
words. Mr. Smith says that a gentlo
man Is clean, honest, courteous to wom
en, kind to children, respectful to old
age, considerate to the poor, and sym
pathetic toward the "under dog." With
the slight amendment that he should
be courteous to other men as well as
to women, this seems satisfactory.
A correspondent of the New York
Times finds new evidence of American
xtravagance and wastefulness In the
articles which American families throw
away. He calls attention to the fact
that a Junk-dealer In New York pays
the city more than seventeen hundred
dollars a week for the privilege of
taking what he pleases from the refuse
cows before they ere towed to sea;
and that although ae thus pays nearly
ninety thousand dollars a year, he re
ceives three hundred and fifty thou
sand for the Junk which be rescue
from the dump. The correspondent's
charge may be true, but hla Illustra
tion does not prove It The value of
old tin cans, waste paper and the other
things which oome from the garbage
heaps is due to quantity and propin
quity. There are millions of the cans,
and in such a quantity they are sala
ble. The few eans an average family
collects are not worth the space they
occupy.
In accounting for the high cost of
living Professor Leughlin of the Uni
versity of Chicago mentioned aeveral
factors excessive duties on raw ma
terial, desertion of the farms by
youth, abuse of combination, lack of
organisation amoug consumers, and
flagrant extravagance, public aud pri
vate. The censure of those who live
up to their income, or beyond it. Who
ape the rich and give no thought to
old g or emergency, was not too se
vere in Professor Laughlln's able lec
ture. And nothing is more whole
some than his hope of "a new aristoc
racy the aristocracy of the simple
life" the aristocracy of men and
women who "pay less homage to gold
and more to the virtues of honesty and
right living." The gospel of the sim
ple life has lent itself to satire and
parody. It has encouraged fads and
posing. Insincere and costly experi
ment. But It will survive ridicule
and perversion. Extravagance Is
folly, and simplicity does not mean
the giving up of such comforts aa are
necessary to cleanliness, to beauty, to
economy of effort. The talk of "back
to nature" is not all ns rational as it
might be. but there is a vital element
of truth in It It is. Indeed, evidence
of a healthy reaction against conges
tion, "whirl" and waste. As a writer
In the Atlantic point out. the same
forces which have produced the cost
of living problem will aid in its solu
tion. "It seems Inevitable," a he
says, "that there should develop some
general conversion of material Into
mental wants, and a partial substitu
tion of culture for wealth as a meas
ure of the value of the Individual."
In fact even the automobiles, clubs
and mechanical pleasures may con
tribute to the revival of slmpllcty and
love of nature. Suburban and rum)
life has pronted by the advance of
machinery, and the trolley has caused
a counter-drift to the open and free
spaces. Never was there more Inter
est among men of affairs than now in
country homes, outings, rural sur
roundings. Professor Laughlln's
"aristocracy" Is perhap already In
process of creation.
AMBERGRIS TREASURE.
Starr of a.lO.OOO l.nmp end Sana.
thin Akail the SibiiuM
The story of how a Manchester
(N. H.) painter found In the St. Law
rence river a lump of grayish sub
stance weighing thirty-eight pounds,
and how he has discovered that the
solid fatty stuff Is ambergls and is
worth $30,000. recalls the nearest
thing to romance that ever entered
into the lives of Gloucester and New
Bedford whalers. In the old days when
American whalers dared every sea. It
was like a lottery. Onre In a lifetime
you might chance on the decaying
body of a whale, giving oft an awful
smell, and Inside that whale would be
a fortune enough so that you would
never have to go to sea again. Charles
Reade, as far as we remember, Is the
only writer to Introduce-ambergls into
Action. In "Love Me Little, Love Me
Long" David tells Miss Fountain how
"the skipper stuffed their noses and
ears with cotton steeped in aromatic
vinegar, and they lighted short pipes
and broached the brig upon the putres
cent monster and grappled to it: and
the skipper Jumped on It and drove
his spade (sharp steel) in behind the
whale's side fins."
It is a matter of record that not far
from the Windward Islands a Yankee
skipper In one of the boat old whaling
years did cut out of a whale 13'i
.pounds of ambergls, which was sold
for 500. The price quoted for many
years was 6 an ounce. Arnbcrg' is
often found floating on the sea, partic
ularly off the coast of Brazil and of
Madagascar. The Bahamas send more
than any other source to market. The
stuff s a secretion of the sperm whale
which dies of the disease producing
the perfume matter. Chemists find It
hard to account for the fact that the
smell of the dead whale Is so horrible
when the substance taken out is valu
able only as a source of sweet smells
Brooklyn Eagle.
Woi a Parallel Caae.
Jokes on the doctor are tempting It
the doctor suffers no Injustice from
them. He is usually a good, as well
as a good-natured target for aitsorted
witticisms. A writer in the Argonaut
has recently related a variation of an
old Jes'., the victim of which Is the
medical man. Among the patients In
certain hospital there was one dis
posed to take a dark view of his
chance for recovery.
"Cheer up. old man!" almonin!'ed
the youthful Intern attached to the
ward wherein the patient lny. "Your
symptoms are Identical with thoiw of
my own case four years ago. I was
Just as sick as you are. Look at me
now!"
The patient ran his eye over the phy
sician' stalwart frame.
"What doctor did you have?" he
finally asked, feebly.
A Boomerang.
One of the officials of the Midland
railway, coming from . Glenwood
Spring yesterday, was telling a young
woman on the train bow wonderfully
productive Colorado Irrigated ground
1.
"Really," be explained, "If so rich
that girl who walk on It bave big
feet. It Just simply make their feet
grow."
"Huh," was the young woman's re
Joinder, "some of the Colorado men
must have been going around walkrag
on their heads." Denver Post.
The Bonne Diplomatic.
"I can't get along with that iook."
"But bave you tried diplomacy, my
dearf
"I have. To-day I handed the minx
ber passport." Louisville Courier
Journal. And money is also the root of many
a family tree).
A SUNNY BOOT.
Ska Was N ! fur stria-Mae"
Bhe Had DISToaM.
"The Dyson girls," as Dulvertuu ex
pressed it, "all amounted to some
thing; they had faculty except, of
course." It usually added, with an in
dulgent smllo. "Miss Vlnule. She
didn't seem to take after the Dysons,
somehow. She did her best; she nev
er shirked; but Lavlnla Dyson's best
friend could scarcely nialutaltt that
ho was capable."
She was gone now, and the gentle,
ludectslve, Butterlug hands had no
more tasks to do. The other Dyson
girls elderly women all, but still girls
In Dulverton mrlance at soberlv In
the sunny parlor, in a companionable
silence, each with her task.
They were busy women, seldom Idle
even for moment. Mis Lucretla
was a leader In church work; Miss
Pamella was a notable housewife, and
took orders for steclal kinds of pre
serve and cake and pickles; Miss
Anne had worked her way through col
lege, aud was a teacher in the high
school; Amanda, the Widow Cole, had
done her duty by three children of
her own and a half doien stepchildren
before she Joined her sister tn the old
homestead.
Abruptly Miss Lucretla laid dowu
her scissors. "I don't believe any one
ef ua would have been missed so
much." she said. "It I'm shamed
to say It's coming to ma as surprise.
We knew what Vlnnle was; we knew
what she meant at home, and, thank
heaven! we loved her for It, and she
knew we did; but t never even
guessed what she meant to other peo
ple.
'The things that everybody I say
Ing the people who stop me In the
street" She broke off to master her
voice, and finished with sudden lit
tie sobbing laugh of pride: "Vlnnle
was an Influence In the community
And how amaird she would have been
If any one had told her so!"
"I know! I know!" assented Miss
Anne. "I'm finding it out, too; and
I've been trying to make out just how
It wne. She didn't do muchor say
much, even, but she was always so
friendly; and she always took it for
granted everybody wanted to do the
best thing the best way she never
wasted time or strength on worries
or resentments, or suspicions, or pet
Unease. People were somehow
ashamed not to behave the way she
expected them to."
"Yes." arreed Miss Lucretla. "and
then they liked her so much; nobody
could help that, and of course thnt
made them want to do what she want
ed. She wa always so pleasant!"
"My girls adored her; they thought
there was nobody with such ways and
manners as Aunty Vlnnle," murmured
Amanda. "Young people never seemed
to feel the bar of age with her; she
seemed so happy,"
"Ah, that wa It!" erld Miss Ann
"I think It was her way of gathering
brightness, and passing It on. Seemed
happy she was happy! Bhe didn't
need to do things like the reel of us
She Just shone! No wonder she's
missed: it's like losing sunshine."
" 'A single sunbeam,' " quoted Mls
Lucretla, softly, from her favorite
Saint Francis, "'can disperse many
shadows.'" Youth's Companion.
The Audubon Society has an uncon
scious branch In Tibet, or one may
say, since such companion exists In
that distant country, that a similar In
fluence Is unnecessary. In Sven Hedln's
"Trans-Himalaya" the traveler spesks
of the sorrow of Oang Gye, the son of
the Governor of 8aka-Dzong, when
one of the caravan shot a wild goose.
He wai quite overcome at this brutal
murder, and could not conceive bow
the servant could be so heartle and
cruel.
"You are right," I answered. "I am
myself sorry for the wild geese. But
you tnuit remember that we are trav-
elers, and dependent for our livelihood
on what the country yields. Often the
chase and fishing are our only re
sources."
"In this district you have plenty of
theep."
"Is It not Just as wrong to kill sheep
and eat their flesh?"
"No!" he exclaimed, with passionate
decision. "That Is quite another mat
ter. You will surely not compare sheep
to wild g'-eso. There Is as much dif
ference between them as between sheep
and human beings. For, like human
beings, the wild geese marry and have
families. And if you sever such
union by a thoughtless shot, you cause
sorrow and misery.
'The goose which has Just been be
reaved of her mate will seek hlin
fruitlessly by dny and night, and will
never leave the place where he has
been murdered. Her life will be empty
and forlorn, and she will never enter
upon a new union, but will remain a
widow, and will soon die of grief. A
woman cannot mourn more deeply
than she will, and the man who has
caused such sorrow draws down a pun
ishment on himself."
I had heard In the Lob country sim
ilar tales of the sorrow of the swans
when their union was dissolved by
death. It was moving to witness Oang
Gye'a tenderness and great sympathy
for the wild geese, and I felt the deep,
est sympathy for him. Many s noble
and sensitive heart beats In the cold
and desolate valleys of Tibet.
Going to school finally becomes a
habit. Many young man continue
In school long after he should be at
work.
Some of our first Impression were
made by mother' slipper.
TIBETAN SENSIBILITY.
)Tk. Middle llarraa llrwwe
HlKh up In an old musty sttlo,
. r more.
i i ,, w- - - .
Tripped a any young brut twltn
hualmnd),
h. . i , I.. Mtti.txiit lore.
The old. old books, from tholr sheep
skins .
l--..r...l t iheiii. Hi they passed.
While she viewed herself In mirror.
llnfor which many wni" unm-.
'Way tm.-k In a corner. atamllng alone.
TM..klv rl-,-,1 O'er With dUSt,
Blood n old tiuhorany bureau.
Wmcllln of rose leave and must
Toward this the bride no wended Hr
wy,
...l.l "Mv hnt a cltyl
We'll have this all done over, dear
We'll send It to the City-"
Bhe opened the upper drawers. In turn.
And exclaimed, al in anas,
laces.
Hut when Into the middle on sn
looked
.... ,, .. -.,r ihotr faces.
j . - - .
There wore ibitnty shoes of every nil.
And liny stwklnc of c"
Little hit nd sucnurs and drosses.
Causing tears lu roll down her face.
For on each and every article
She found the name of the tlttl one
Who Inst wore the treasured dainty.
And from a mother's arms had flown.
In the heart of each fond mother
Thor's a middle bureau drawer.
Where rvt,,. d.ilnly troasure.
Some of them worn snd torn.
Utile shoes, all soiled and worn at the
side;
Utile bits, all stained snd wot.
But there srvn'l any troasurv Ilk
them.
At least I've not found them yet
The Krmlalaa Mevolt.
Th relatlou bctaeen the coat of liv
ing and the activity In th Issuance of
marriage llreiisrj I reeognlied tnti
mate, even though the economists may
not be able to eiprea the subtle fact
tn a mathematical formula. But there
can be no doubt that Cupid keeps an
eye on the market prices of provlsloa
even though he may have Utile use tor
the tailor.
There ran be no doubt that this
prlghtly promoter of felicity has
abandoned the old fallacy, enticing
but lllunory. that two person can llv
Just as cheaply a can one. Perhaps
that untruth In dometlc mathematics
took form at a time when girl were
different In wuii material respect
from the msldens of to-day. It was
onre the fad that they should be dell
cats, without appetite, taking food
after the manner of birds, with anae
mic results. They wore more fond of
cake and sweetmeat than of prosaic
bread, potato and roast beef : In
those day there might be more econ
omy In the feminine menu. But the
girl of to-day I brought up to be
buxom and robust. There ha bran
reaction, both sensible and wide
spread. Hhe lake proper pride fii her
appetite and In her muscle, which
he ha learned ate not at all tncon
slstent with gentle sentiment. She
emulates her bothers In fondness fur
th oin air and for suitable athletics
There Is no longer any reason for
her sentlnml semlstarvatlon. It h
like ballad to her eyebrow, she I
ready also for a lobster after the
opera. Hhe may approve of kisses
from the one right man. but he muat
also be able to provide menu more
extended than bread and cheese
Hence the normal snd active feminine
Interest In the revolt against high
prices In the market place. Washing
on Post
labor I. Ifta.
If a gloss U desired on linen, add
teaapooiiful of suit to starch when
making.
In Ironing handkerchiefs, It Is well
to begin at the center; If one Irons
the hem first, the middle will bave o
tendency to bulge or "full."
Few know that a cold boiled potato
rubbed on a piece of paper for fit
minute will form a moisture of th
consistency of glue, and Is a satisfac
tory substitute for -mucilage In rase of
an emergency.
I'uliinala ('oaluaia.
A useful llttlu costum for late
spring and summer I shown In this
one of white and dark blue foulard
which has a slightly trained plain
ktrt over which full a belted polo
naise of the name, material, widely
yfy
banded with uark blue satin, overlap
ping al the pointed ld n apt-v
I .ltd llnv button coV-
ered with bins !" The fullnea at
the waist line Is connneu ir a a....
of the satin, and H' seamle. shoul
dor elongate tn
tutted with ' ml '",m",,
with s frilling ol emi-rowerw! n..
ii. i.. i.i that flnUhltig the low-
cut neck. Whit silk glove smbMl-
a .uk .irk Mui ana " '
trimmed with white ln' and plume
rcpt the colof scheme oi n m.
fads mct fdJid$s
Collar and cuff set are enen more
In favor
Thr piece suit of foulard r an
extreme novelty.
Narrow skirt Increase In favor, al
though plaited skirt are popular.
taatrlord dim 111.- mada ovf fol
ore.1 slip or twttliivaU r quit new
Th. .trlnM am sunVtently wide to
iwnnll IJie underneath color lo show
Ihrouirti Such drease n4 IUH or
no trimming and style are extremely
plain
tai-a arnrfa ar fast taking th ptacw
of chiffon and crepe do chine a an
emntn headdreas The laras are rr
gtle and show the armngroent ot U
miff lira tmnrath. The scarfs are made
long, but are not lied, a Ihey drape
prettily.
A n.ar eded batiste, showing
plain twrdrr on and half Inrbe
wide, la made In plaited yw wun me
STRAWS OF LATEST PATTCRSI.
Here am two ot the good new mtxk! In rough a!iw ItUil-in pla
largi part lu th trlmmlrg of une ot litem, and the band tul lb ervwS
I frsiocned with a wreath of liny rtiave. The other hat la turned up Sharply
at ono side, and It trimming savors of the chanter lor,
border a a piping, imt a band. The
effWt I charming, a the edging Is
a plain color and delineate any good
feature of the dreaa
The leather colored linen Is made
Into a suit of tailored foatums, with
the Jacket front widely separated to
reveal a double rum of soft whit
mull. The hat is burnt onhre straw
with trimming of black taffeta silk
and stiff blark algrets.
A smart spring bat I In biscuit
colored fin straw, with a big bow of
many loop of black tulle set rather
toward th bark and veiling a great
cluster of purple and green leave
Th Violet and leave are of satin, suf
ficiently bright In hue not to tie com
pletely dulled by the tillla.
Kofi-thread tatting, n-l tn soft net
rwllar, I used In attractive tww-k-
wear. A ready mndn tatting, resem
bling the band mode variety, serve
very wall. Among the dmp lace col
lars which encircle the nmk Is a
round one made of mull, finely plaited
and Inset with leave, tendril and
flower of Irish rrorhM. There is
sufficient weight In the applliiued
trimming to bold the webllke collar
In place.
To Wear In Ik flair.
A pretty Imlr novelty la a band of
golk embroidered In delicate silk," says
Mine, itlihe In the Woman's Home
Companion, "iimelline pink, some
time blue, but always In th sumn
color a the gown with which It Is to
be worn. This band Is long enough
to run from ear to ear across the soft
low pompadour which I now the
vogue. Fancy buckle and sometimes
embroidered buttons finish lioth end
Under these, hairpins are fastened to
hold the band In Ua proper placa."
Wan of Waallaa.
Borne women foolishly think It a in
flection on their generosity to be care
ful about the llttlo things, while other
women economise unwisely.
Instead of making the pot full of
weak tea for the sake ot economy, or
df strong tea for the sake of being con
sidered generous, and throwing away
halt of It In either cjuki, measure both
tea and water and make enough good
tea so that It Ii practically all used.
Never mn:o n bl-r nrn when a light
one I sufficient. In cooking with gas
or oil, turn off he heat ai soon as
through with It; ir water Is t be
boutud, do not heat mora or hotter
than te!rd, I know a omu w
I endeavoring by uiati at UlawuL
and bookkeepllW til keep down tfcT;
Itig espouse, who Ihrwi iirim IZ
day bl hugw keltla ot l
a rww iu ill" wining
for th dlh washing and th.,Z
about half of It arter u i ndi,,?
usable temperature, Kb
eunugn m luei iq nuy ma ffttn
other dalntle ot which she Btprh
nor fawny, in oruer id kaep tttlit
hr llowancex
ttearrv alt the toft overs, but ua.
Iso thrm simply, tins wontts a,tg
lake the good tilt ot most that u
t. k little stitck, a ttc ot stalstak,
and au egg. and provide dstlrkaa
meal course for the family lutr
from material, with I'm M-pito aj
th etg, that r tn themwlva
tea. Another woman will t
throw out th leftover Aaotaw
put thorn on th (able In thulr ,
palatable condition, unlit th fatauf
eat them tn do juration, or they W
com totally usolaao. And yt soot bat
Oar unumuail new material 10 eta,
real th etd. thu spending mix m
v Utile,
V Wea Mala,
tt rams to be pretty w.ll stsj
tUhed that originally th. matters f
reUttouahlp and Vmn'0I. !oag ell
all that fullowod. were dalennlawt
through the female I inc. Klnahlp, tat
therefore, property. r4 kf
the miilber. Iletc the power ot th
early woman. When a young woa
got married ah lock r fctubaM
horn with br, and If he pruvsd
worthy II w wlthta hr po. t
rat him out Th woman ws It
"bcea," and whn h said "On at
had o g ut I' riprllli
lata In the Mai.iry of human society
lliat we first sea the change from fe
male to mat headihtp In the matter
of kinship and Inheritance and In th
consequent transfer of the power d
Importance from ihe woman to ths
man 'hlrgn F.ismlner.
Novell r la trlanalat.
'-CP
million, which uses ui;li a promi
nent place In millinery this sraaon,
1 the most practical ot trimming
When used In a large fiat loose bow,
with compact little wreatha of small
flowers, tt I most charming In effect
Aa laalaaalloa,
ICthnl (confidentially) Do you
know, Clara, that I bad two offer ol
marrlag last week?
Clara (with enthusiasm) 4Jh, ! m
delighted, dimrl Then th report Is
really true that your unci luft you
hi money rick Me Up,
Ilk SaoaU Male.
Whore silk Imsu am rubbed Into
holm In the back by low shoe or
pump, It I usually useless to darn
them In the ordinary way. Placa
ploc of silk of the lamo color un
derneath and darn thu stockings to It
I'illna- It Oa.
, The young, Inexperienced wlf was
In tears, "Just think, mamma," she
sobbed. "Henry threw a biscuit at
in. On I timiUi myself, too." "Th
monstorl' crlod her mother. "!! might
havo killed you." luulou News,