Real World
continued from page 5
peepers focused on me and my
dreams of prime-time glory bal
ancing on my response, I sum
moned this reply:
“Um, I would name it after a
symbol. Like Prince. And the
laws? On Sundays, everyone
would wear tutus. And the official
country beverage would be two
percent milk.”
Prime time, watch out.
Everyone received one hypo
thetical absurdity and nothing
more. I did receive some more at
tention when a girl was asked to
invent a personal history of one of
us at the table. She chose me, re
marked how I reminded her of
Ethan Embry from “Empire
Records,” and that I suffered
childhood trauma after I fell off
the school bus a couple of times.
Fell off? Was it a rural Mexican
school bus, and was I squatting on
the roof? “No, you just fell off,”
she answered. Hmpf. I am clumsy.
Ten minutes later, the interview
was over. The casting directors hus
tled us out and herded in a new
Bechard
continued from page 5
National Poetry Slam’s other com
petitors, but who cares? We ended
up with a pretty respectable and
distinctively voiced team. With
powerful themes and very individ
ual styles, the competitors should
make a decent showing for them
selves as well as our fine city.
And without Foolscap Books
owner Marietta Bonaventure, none
of this would have happened. She
has been kind enough to volunteer
the use of her store as a venue; she
arranged and held fundraisers
while serving as the liaison be
tween all of us weirdoes.
Now, minus a few more
fundraisers, our poetry slam fun is
winding down. Again we’ll find
ourselves getting drunk under the
penetrating blue lights of the 20
television sets mounted on some
seedy bar’s walls, wishing there
was something exciting to do on a
beautiful Saturday night. And
those lucky jerks in Chicago will
have gotten to see the nation’s
best poets.
Contact the Pulse columnist
atjosephbechard@dailyemerald.com.
His views do not necessarily represent
those of the Emerald.
Check out
ODE Online
for current
issue,
archives,
staff
listings,
e-mail
addresses,
alumni
news and
much
more!
batch of hopefuls, all of them making
the same Fonz and Cheshire Cat
faces. In all, more than 500 people
auditioned — more than twice the
number of other cities currently be
ing scouted. Approximately 20 peo
ple were called back on Sunday, with
an estimated 10 more awaiting
phone calls this week. Thousands
will be interviewed nationwide, and
Courtesy
the show’s season will begin mid-Au
gust at a thus-far undisclosed loca
tion.
So far my phone has been
silent. It's OK; I lied on my appli
cation, anyway. After all, in the
real world, that's what people do.
Contact the Pulse reporter
at markbaylis@dailyemerald.com.
942-8730 484-1927
STUDENT SPECIAL
, GOLF 9 HOLES $10
£ Students Only. Must show ID. (Monday - Friday)
IBOOK YOUR SUMMER
IN OREGON
UNIVERSITY OF QREGON
SUMMER
SESSION
2003 SUMMER SESSION
GROUP-SATISFYING AND ELECTIVE COURSES, SHORT COURSES,
SEMINARS, AND WORKSHOPS BEGIN THROUGHOUT THE SUMMER.
Summer session begins June 23. Registration begins May 5.
The UO Summer Session Catalog with Schedule of Classes
will be available in early April. You can speed your way
toward graduation by taking required courses during summer.
2003 SUMMER SCHEDULE
First four-week session: June 23-July 18
Second four-week session: July 21-August 15
Eight week session: June 23-August 15
Eleven week session: June 23-September 5
333 Oregon Hall
1279 University of Oregon
Eugene OR 97403-1279
Telephone (541) 346-3475
Check our website
http://uosummer.uoregon.edu
UNIVERSITY OF OREGON