Implications of sex can be less than casual
Many risks surround the thrills
of a casual sexual escapade
that some students prefer over
an intimate relationship
Caron Alarab
Safety/Crime/Transportation Reporter
The jungle juice drool of a snooz
ing stranger oozes onto your sheets.
Your pounding hangover explains
the ripped condom package on the
bedside table and the slimy love
glove stuck to headboard. You mar
vel at the magic of beer goggles as
you show your not-so-pretty bed
mate to the door, hoping this one
won’t hold on for dear life. No name,
no number, no attachment, no prob
lem — for those who thrive on the
temporary thrills of the infamous
one-night stand.
But reality hits, and those with a
vice for short-lived sex are usually
hiding from something—intimacy.
“Eventually, they build a wall
around their emotions to the point
where it doesn’t matter who any
more,” University Health Educator
Ramah Leith said.
Considering the risks associated
with one-night stands — every
thing from increased risk of con
tracting infections to emotional
guilt — Leith said sex should not be
taken lightly.
“Good communication about past
sexual histories, contraceptive
methods and the relationship in gen
eral are very important to have a ful
filling and safe sex life,” Leith said.
“As a health educator, I find it hard
to find positive reasons for any per
son to have a one-night stand.”
Yet, many students do partake in
a little “wham-bam-thank-you
ma’am” — or sir.
“I don’t know a girl who hasn’t had
a one-night stand,” said Rachel, a
junior at the University. Rachel said
she’s kept such good tabs on her sex
ual partner pool that one time, she
decided to inform No. 24 of his sta
tus on her list — immediately after
committing the act.
Leith said partner-counting is def
initely more of an intimacy issue
than a hobby, even if the partici
pants are in denial. She added that a
majority of individuals who count
are male.
She noted that the partying and
living situations in college offer more
opportunities for unplanned sex, but
individual maturity levels sometimes
helps those with a vice for one-night
stands to eventually wise up.
When it comes to freshmen girls,
University senior Brian, who wished
to be identified only by his first
name, said one-night stands for men
of his stature are like shooting fish in
a barrel. Of the 30 one-night experi
ences he has had over the past three
years, Brian said probably 23 of
them would ignore him in public.
Casual sex with no attachment can be a thrill, but it doesn't come without some risks.
Photo illustration by Jeremy Forrest Emerald
And although he thinks one-night
stand seduction is a two-way street,
he said females get obsessed and at
tached while men ask themselves,
“If she’s ready and willing, where has
she been?”
Joey, a junior, said his definition
of a one-night stand doesn’t neces
sarily involve sex, and even “heavy
petting” could leave someone
feeling ashamed and regretful in
the morning.
Freshman Rick said he once took
a girl out to breakfast after a one
night stand that didn’t go further
than oral sex. However, his gracious
ness backfired when she assumed
the meal meant they were “togeth
er” and when she decided to have
sex with him a week later, he broke
up with her.
“I was just trying to be nice,” he
said. “I didn’t want a relationship.”
After her first one-night stand dur
ing her freshman year, Haley, now a
junior, said she expected “couple
dom” the next morning, only to get
a cold response from her hangover
bedmate.
Turn to Casual, page 4B
Enjoy casual sex; or any casual needs — just be honest
Love is a good thing. Society tells
itself all sorts of fantasy stories about
love — about the real thing, Mr. or
Ms. Right, the one and only. These
stories tell us how amazing it is to
find that perfect mate.
But that’s not what I’m here to talk
about, at least not directly. I’m here
in defense of casual sex, and this is
n’t a casual argument. My argument
isn’t borne of loneliness or the desire
to rationalize cheap hedonism. It
comes from experience.
A lot of people in our culture deni
grate casual sex. If you need proof,
take a look at the covers of countless
magazines, all of which trumpet bet
ter ways to find that perfect person.
They say casu
al sex is unful
filling and can
only cause
problems for
those who en
gage in it.
The reason
people have
such a problem
with casual
sex, though, is
that they were
told a fiction
that goes some
thing like this: The only real happi
Michael J.
Kleckner
The editor's office
ness comes from finding that one
person who can fulfill all your needs.
Now, having one person to fulfill
all my physical and emotional needs
sounds great on paper, and I’m look
ing forward to the time when that
happens. But real life is more com
plicated than this picture.
Most people have a variety of dif
ferent needs: romantic, domestic,
friendly and sexual, to name just a
few. And it can be difficult to fulfill all
those needs in one person — that
can be asking a lot of one fallible hu
man being.
So until the time comes when this
one utterly fantastic person comes
along with the magical ability to do
everything, I have enough respect
for myself and enough personal in
tegrity to recognize that I do have
these various needs. I have enough
sense to realize that with a little
care, I can have these needs fulfilled
from a variety of people — and that
in so doing, I might become a better
rounded individual who will be more
attractive to that one special person.
The key, though, and the only
thing that can make casual sex work
— or casual romantic fulfillment, or
any other need fulfillment — is hon
esty. You need to be honest with
yourself, to know what you really
want from the other person, and you
need to be honest with that person,
to tell them what you really want
and what you’re willing to give.
My experience shows that hon
esty works. I’ve had roommates that
fulfilled the domestic needs, and
dates that fulfilled the romantic
needs, and “friends with benefits”
that fulfilled the sexual needs. I’ve
had relationships where more than
one type of need was fulfilled at a
time by the same person, and those
were great. But honesty was neces
sary in all these cases so that no one
Turn to Kleckner, page 4B
SUNDAY NIGHTS
SIN
IS IN
Sunday night is S.I.N. night
(service industry night)
• Show Food Handlers or OLCC
card and get in free.
• Specials all night
• 2nd and 4th Sunday Every
month HOT OIL WRESTLING
MONDAY
"STUDENT
BODY
NIGHT"
• Show your student ID to get
in FREE \
• Amateur Dance Contest.
$ 100 Cash prize.
Nudity optional. ';5
2 165 W. 1 1th Avenue • Eugene • 683-602 1
Monday - Friday 12-2 Saturday & Sunday 2-2
www.hotbody.com
K Better Ingredients.
WB Better Pizza.
South Eugene and u of 0
484-PAPA (7272)
Springfield, Duck's village, Chase village
and University commons
746-PAPA (7272)
Bethel/Danebo
Santa Clara/River Road
461-PAPA (7272)
Free Cheesestick
■ buv a Large 1-Topping
| pizza for only $£|99
and receive an order
of cheesestlcks
Available in Original or Thin Crust. Not valid with any other offer
or special. Limited delivery areas. $1 charge on delivered orders.
Expires 3/30/03 i