OPINION
In search of the elusive financial aid
Pal Malach
Entering the wilds of higher
education at the beginning
of each year is always a
frightening proposition.
The dense foliage of paper
work and computer printouts it
takes to run a 16,000-student
university is immense.
One studious creature, one
speck in the gnind scale of the
wilderness, can be lost liko a
Blrkenstock in Brian Hoop's
closet without Marlon Perkins
to save the day.
And so it happened to me.
The safari started earlier this
summer. Knowing how crowd
ed and confused the outback of
Oregon Hall gets once tho na
tives return, I headed for the
Office of Financial Aid to maku
sure my life-sustaining funds
were in place and ready to be
delivered.
Tho news the financial aid
workers gave mo walloped me
on the heud like a fulling coco
nut. I screwed up. I had failed
to return the proper forms, and
my aid was in jeopardy.
But hope remained. I suc
cessfully petitioned to have a
hold removed from my aid,
gathered all the proper informa
tion and forms, turned them in
and was told my aid would lie
ready by Sept. 24.
My trek through tho financial
aid office was smooth sailing.
But knowing that infamous
ly-abnisive Oregon Hall has this
funny thing alxiut withholding
financiol aid from people who
still owe money, I got a draw
from work, took out an emer
gency loan and paid off my ac
counts receivable.
Now I could sit back and en
joy the expedition.
But when my Duck (lull bill
arrived from the University,
there was no sign of my finan
cial aid. Search parties were
sent out looking and were as
sured that everything would be
accounted for when time came
to pay up in the ballroom.
One speck In the
grand scale of the
wilderness can be
lost like a
Blfkenstock In
Brian Hoop’s
closet
Ii wus just <i hoax to lull me
into a sense of security while
the insidious bureaucratic can
nibals set their trap
Day One:
Thinking I was simply taking a
leisurely stroll through the for
mality of payment. I went to
the ballroom to have my finan
cial aid adjusted onto my bill.
Ha, ha. hu, ha.
"HH'mmmm sorry, wo have
no record of any financial aid
for you," I was told. "Try back
this afternoon when they send
another shipment up."
I bought it. And on my sec
ond trip. I was told thoro were
still no chocks, computer cred
its or any acknowledgement of
my aid.
Day Two:
I thought I was making progress
on my third try at the ballroom.
“Your Pell (Irani and other
aid will bo put directly onto
your account at the cashior's of
fice," I was told.
Day Throe:
When I wont to Accounts Re
ceivable and checked what I
owed, there was still no Indica
tion of financial aid. The state
ment suid I was in debt for all
of my tuition, and. of course,
the S20G 1 owed for the emer
gency loan I took out earlier.
Next, I went to the financial
aid office to see if it wus the
source of the problem Nope.
They hud paid tny financial aid
to Oregon Hull on Sept. 16.
“It's at the cashier's office
Check with the poople there,
and they can tell you what's
been done with your aid,” the
woman said with a smile, actu
ally taking time to give me di
rections to tho proper desk.
Hey. Pm protty easy going, so
1 bought it again. Maybe I
didn't hold my tongue right
when I asked the last lime.
The fellow behind the coun
ter was all smiles and cheer for
the attractive woman ahead of
mo. But his attitude changed
when I got to the front of the
lino. (Must’ve boon the tongue
again.)
"That'll be up at the ball
room," he scowled, like my
question was a personal affront
to his previous aura of cheer
Why not7 What could it hurt?
I'm going near the ballroom
ugain anyway.
"Wo don't have any record of
your financial aid here. Have
you checked at the cashier's of
fice?" the woman, who had no
idea of the history of this expe
dition, said with a straight face.
I explained that I reali/.od it
wasn't her fault, hut this safari
hud lost its charm. The supervi
sor she called over didn't help
Tolling her the people at Ac
counts Receivable had no idea
what wus going on and she
was my lust hope — didn't help
at all. It seemed that to her, it
was my fault the uid was lost
I can't explain what hap
pened next. Maybe it was the
fact that for the past three days
I hud survived on seven pack
ets of assorted Kamens and one
bowl of macaroni (minus the
cheese because 1 didn't have
the milk and butter necessary
to complete the cycle), hut my
middle finger developed a
mind of its own.
Chock this!
When I got paid Thursday. I
had S2<> (M after paying rent bo
cuuse 1 took the big druw to pay
off my account so my aid
wouldn't lie held. I've already
used the emergency loan op
tion for the same reason.
I still haven't bought my
books. I don't dare go back to
Oregon Hull and insult them
uguin by asking what's hap
pened to my grants. And they
wonder why people storm
buildings with assault rifles.
Of course, that option isn't
open to me because I don't
have uny money to buy a gun.
I'ul Mulach Is editor of the
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