UNIVERSITY Book of Love may not have happy ending Communication forms foundation for understanding By Tammy Batey fnicraifl Reportet I,() VI' III.ikes till' world Sin round, or so tin1 saving goes I’erhaps it would In' more .11 i urate lo say 1 li.it lori> or ro mam.i' makes your.own world •.I> 1 ti .it .1 giddier par e Hut while .1 rclationshi|) mil I .1 use your heart to pound your knees to gross weak and your head to spin, it is seldom .1 port'll pleasant rxperienr e Dr \ a 111 s Koliln ns a 11 tensed psvi hologist frerpieiitK 1 mi use Is people on relationship Issues In 1 ounselmg sessions. Rob Inns treats the lelationship it sell rathel than either of the part nets as the vii t i in She said she often works with people who are upset be i ause their partners don I live up to then expel t.itl( 1IIS I vel voile I nines into tela I ion slops with eertain f ixed ideas about how supportive how 1 hallenging. how smart how valuable the other person should he and what psyi holog II a I needs the ot her person should fulfill. Robbins said ( ini' person projei Is om s tin 1 onsi ions expei tat ions on the otliei person and those expei I at ions do not always mail h re alltv t’s\i linings student Ryan Ste plions who is involved in a re lalionslnp w itli anothet male student said lie has dealt ssitli unmet e x pel tat lolls A piolili-m is wanting the relationship to be perlei I when it isn't a perlei t w01 III and sou 1 an t have a perlei t relation ship Stephens said I ni al ssass bugging him to talk about his feelings I ssant him to sas I lose sou when he says Arm should knoss that \nothei issue that people deal with ss hen tiles form rela tmnships is whether tiles rail retain their autonomy l an people ail independently ot eai h other ‘ Robbins asked I’re jou r na 11 sin st u de n t Auess.i Wallen said that people often don’t realize boss depen dent they are on then boyfriend or girlfriend until the relation / U,,\inn oxrnomr .ill thr harrirrs to .1 /).»/>/»» rvUtmnship ot Irast momrnt.irilx .mil \nrw.i \\.irrvnrnfox a milkshakr and rat h nthrr s < o trip a 11 v Photo l>* Imi l * an* I nni r.iti sluilrnls < hrn l oomis ship dissolves I went out with someone lor lnut vears W.irri'n s.iul 'l on stall !u sis vnillsell Iht iimiliv: more like them .imi unit wlioli' world revolves .iroinul them When thev’re gone von h.ive nothing I )l SteV e S< hw elt/er .1 ll tensed psychologist, said r> 11 pert ent of the t hetlls he sees h.ive t ont.erns .thonl then inti unite rehiiitmships \inong the issues th.it spaik anger and confusion in rtda tionships are sex tnunev and trust lie said Ml prohlems ullimalelv have to i|.. with column nu at ion St hueit/ei said, and he tries 111 therapv to rebuild the fouiida I ions ol t omuniuii at um 1 tear h them to t omnium I ate how thev re feeling t learlv ami the sense that thev re he mg understood hv the othei he said I’sycholngy student Wvxon Smith said people have to real i/e that then partners are not inmdreaders ' Thev re not alvvavs going to know what voii ie thinking Smith saiil Minost even Student inter V lew ed ti U tills ai til le said the lirsl month ol a relationship is the period during which part ncrs slop believing in I In* ro ill.min idi'.ii thill uni' will |usl know hovs thr i it tin Inis .uni sl.irt establishing solid i nmniii mi .itKin Unit' this piTiml has passi*d. t nmmunii iilion though still ,i potential prohltTii hoi nines .1 in.i|oi attribute ot a mniiogam oils relationship Stephens said I here are i ert.lin tilings you share with your partner that you don't share vs ith yoiil 11lends lie said ship is having someone Id talk Id. sharing tin* problems. shar mg tlii* |d\ s sharing lime luge (her hi* said Annthei i harai li-rislii ot a re lationship is a si*nsi* dI s<*i uri Is s\ iiii h Id a i rrtam extent is hi'.dllis Stephens said Hul tin* most imporlanl gaugi* ol a satisfying relationship is what Stephens called being liapps . separate while togetli ei ' In other words, a person in a good relationship should be able to retain their personal 77m? best part of a relationship is 'having someone to talk to, sharing the problems, sharing the joys, sharing time together.' -Sam Yu S.im Yu a pit' business ml ministration student, said In believes varying pun options alxiut uh.it s really happening is sometimes .1 problem he tween him .mil his girlfriend She'll think she knows it .ill .inti I'm pis! tr\ mg to tell her uh.it re,ilk goes on \ u said However i ommuiin ation < .ill also be the i luel benefit ol a relationship, he said I lie best part ot a relation happiness whih* t>«*iUK part ol the i (tuple, he said Drawing on lessons learned from previous relationships i an he helpful for a person in solved in a new relationship Smith said ( )ne thing you learn is that "the people YOU (hose to he is 1th were not the right lines, ' she said "You learn what worked You learn what not to do " Chronic fatigue support group meets today Student parents meeting In organize a student-parent assiK i.itinii will meet from 2 HI to 4 |i in m the I'Atr U.limit Room ( all :MI> 2,I2(> tor details Et als Martin Davies a visiting si ientist from I lie linguistic s and philosophy department at Mi l will speak on "I ai ing l'p to I Inn.mativisin'' at •} p in m Room -/111 Cdlhert Hal! The event is sponsored liv the Philosophv ( Inh The chronic fatigue svr drcime support group meets Sunclav at I p in in the Ian era Id People's Utility Dis trie t building. ,Lt7 t.i Seavey Loop Road ( all ti8t> () 1 It) lor more information The film 1 /fee a c/e ot De struction w hich doc unients tile struggles ol rubber tree tappers m Brazil's rain for est will be shown by the l.at in A meric a n Support t ommittee at 1.! it) p m in the I Alt' Hen 1 .inder Room The Muslim Student Asso c iation Islamic Soc ietv ot North Americ a. the organi /ation alt11 iated with the ASl () w ill bold a session on rai ism in South Atm a Israel and the United States at 1 1 1(1 a m in the I MU (1 nutwood Room Muslim led u re a n d prayer also being spoil sored by the MSA ISN'A w ill be at 1 p m 111 the komonia ( enter, 1-11-4 Kin i .nd St I he \e w man ( enter Dial) Kmerald St is holding Masses Saturday at "> p ill and Sunda\ at 'I and 1 1 a m and at 7: ill p ill Deadline for submitting I t a/s tn tin■ Kmerald hunt desk, EMU Suite inn is noon thi' day hetore puhlii a lion I t a/s run the c/.n oi tho even/ unless the event takes pi,ii e hflorv noon Vetoes of events with a donation or admission i /large it ill not he ac i eptec/ t ALL WAYS TRAVEL AH1I M K\ K t A(iI >1 > J FARE WAR! Take advantage of our low air fares today. l ast Coast I os Angeles $358.00 $2 38.00 Midwest San Frant isco $5 I 8.00 $2 58.00 Travel must br completed by SrpIcmlH*! n) I 99 1 Ticket* must br purchased before luur 1 . 1991. Seven